Zootopia Tails:

Baby's Been a Bad Bad Bunny

By Jeremy McLaughlin

Chapter One:

Oh Those Virgin Ears

Saying that the ZPD firing range was a room was a bit of an understatement. It was more like a parking garage. The open expanse echoed every sound in the room no matter how small. It was cold, gray concrete walls with a matching floor and ceiling to boot. The only thing that set it apart from a parking garage were the small tracks suspended from the ceiling, each responsible for totting a paper target to the desired distance for the gunman targeting it.

Judy felt the sweat beading on her brow, catching in her taut black eyebrows. The soft thup sound from her tranquilizer dart gun was quiet, but still loud enough to cause an echo. The new aluminum casing on the rounds offered no resistance against the air, the sleek purple feathers at the rear kept it flying straight for longer, driving it to the paper destination right where she'd been aiming.

"That was a good shot, Judy."

Nick leaned against the counter next to her. He twirled his traq gun on his index finger like a gunslinger from the old west, a trick she'd caught him doing off and on. Judy's found his slumped form out of the corner of her purple eyes. It still surprised her how strapping he looked in his on-duty blues. Police academy had been increasingly difficult for him, but with her tutoring, he'd finished in the upper twenty percentile, as the first Fox police officer, not an easy feat. Chief Bogo seemed a bit more accepting this time around.

"Oh piddle stick." The chubby cheetah next to Nick wasn't having the best of luck with the prototype tranquilizer cartridges. "These things are defective if you ask me."

Judy smirked, it was well known that Benjamin Clawhauser wasn't the strongest member of the police force. All of his scores in the academy were middling at best, but he was a very good receptionist at the front desk. Friendly and driven to be as helpful as possible, not too mention he was well liked by many of his fellow police officers, and very charismatic. If you ever needed help getting your paper work done in a hurry, he was the one to see about it.

"Nah buddy, you're just looking at it all wrong." Nick chided, sliding a fresh clip of six darts into his tranq gun. "You have to pretend that the target is something more then a black outline with white target lines on it." At the mention of this, Judy stopped firing and decided to watch the self assured fox work his magic.

Nick held the gun as he was trained to do. Right arm straight, the butt of the handle firmly pressed against the crease at his thumb, his fingers cradling the gun more then gripping it. His other hand holding the weight to add support. Judy was impressed by his stance, Nick was a officer now a real professional.

"Alright Benny, focus on it. Imagine the targets something you want, desperately...the only way to get it is to..."

Nick kept both his eyes open, Judy's keen ears heard him suck in a breath holding it, she watched his finger depress the trigger. Thup filled the room and a second later the dart struck the paper, it was nearly a bullseye. Judy couldn't resist a tiny cheer for her friend, pumping her fists in the air.

"That's pretty amazing, Wildecat." A fond pet name Clawhauser chose for Nick. It always warranted an eye roll from Nick and a giggle from Judy.

Nick moved to stand next to Judy with his arm around her shoulders. He whispered a warm breath against her sensitive ear. "Watch this."

Clawhauser struck the same pose, it differed slightly because of the cheetah's larger stature. It was still a standard ZPD stance. "Pretend that target is a juicy back up dancer tiger's fanny, and..." Nick quipped as the cheetah pulled the trigger. The dart thwacking the paper. When it settled back, Judy was amazed to see the perfect bullseye.

"Yeah buddy, I told you."

"You were right, Wildecat. Once I envisioned those tasty cakes, all I had to do was follow through with putting the stem on the apple." The cheetah snapped back, holstering his gun at his hip.

Nick gasped and covered Judy's ears with his hands."Easy there, Benny. You keep that up and you'll make Judy's virgin ears bleed."

Judy jerked away glaring up at the fox. "Virgin ears?! Are you insinuating that I don't get or appreciate adult humor?"

"What? Me? Parish the...no that's exactly what I mean. I'm not saying that you couldn't enjoy it, but you're pretty wholesome. A precious cinnamon roll, if I may."

"I like cinnamon rolls." Clawhauser added.

"We know you do, bud..."

"That just goes to show how much you know about me, Officer Wilde." Judy interrupted, her face growing hot.

That was the signal telling Nick he may have gone a little too far with the teasing, but as usual his pride kept him from backing down. "I'm not insulting you, Jude. If anything I'm kinda envious. I've seen some stuff. Stuff I wish I could unsee, while you on the other hands see the world through the eyes of a precious lamb."

"Keep yucking it up, fox. I guess I'll just have to prove you wrong." Judy twirled her tranq gun on her finger, slamming it into her holder, strapping it down all in a smooth motion.

Nick's easy smile moved along his muzzle, she could see his lazy eyes searching her face, Judy tried to hide the fact that she was angry. Tried to will away the building blush that always came on when he looked at her with those green eyes.

"Alright, if you can prove me wrong then I'll come to work in women's clothing for a week."

Judy's demeanor faltered as the thought of the fox in women's clothing made her chuckle. "And if I can't, what do you get."

Nick rested both of his hands on her shoulders, a smirk playing across his face. "Then you have to invite me to your folks house for dinner, tell 'em we're dating."

"Oh snap." Clawhauser added, having been quiet through most of the exchange.

"No, no, no. I can't do that. It would kill my father."

"Then you better dirty that halo, honey bunny, or we'll be holding hands at daddy's funeral." Nick managed to spin his gun on the edge of his finger, holstering it much the same as Judy had done. Judy watched him walk away, his tail twitching in time with his footsteps.

"Girl, congratulation on yours and Nick's blossoming 'relationship'." Clawhauser added in a snarky tone.

"Thanks." Judy uttered, knowing that she'd have to work fast if she didn't want to be humiliated in front of her family.