Disclaimer: RWBY is owned by Rooster Teeth.

Cover Art: [calvinklein2501] on Twitter.

Author's Notes: A simple idea I had yesterday.

Her chin stung, and her face was covered in dirt. Ruby felt that it was safe to assume that her plan had failed, and her life was over.

She didn't remember when the idea had first taken root, but suddenly the thought of taking something that wasn't hers hadn't bothered her. There were vague images in her mind – long aisles of produce, fluorescent lights, the rattle and clatter of shopping carts, and a big box of cookies – that hinted towards her first ambition. Who would care if she took a cookie or two? The box had so many, and if she was fast no one would even know. And Ruby Rose was fast, especially with cookies; her parents had had to hide the jar somewhere new every week it seemed. It couldn't hurt, right? In the end, she had restrained herself, scared of the consequences if she were caught.

But the next time, she wasn't as scared. She was more assured of herself, absolutely positive that if she was fast and timed it right so no one would see, she'd get to enjoy a free box of cookies. She made plans, marked where the cameras were on a mental map, and carefully watched for employees that walked by her targeted aisle. Her heart had been beating at what felt like a million times a second as she reached up and took the box, tucked it underneath her sweatshirt, and made for the exit. Every pair of eyes seemed to watch her as she walked to the doors, and she had held her breath, hoping she didn't look nervous. No one had stopped her, no one had noticed, but she hadn't planned on the sirens as she walked through the scanners. So nervous she almost fainted, something inside her told her to run, and she did. She had sprinted, panting, no longer caring who saw that it was she, that it was Ruby Rose who had stolen the cookies! She ran, thinking only about escaping the pursuit she was sure was on her heels, using every trick to the escape path she'd planned out the day before until finally she arrived at her hideout. She waited, breathless, for the authorities to come and drag her out, make her return the cookies and apologize, and then they'd tell her dad!

But no one came, and she enjoyed the fruits of her labors until she was sick. It had probably been her nerves, but she had vomited the entire contents of her prize, and then felt even worse. She hadn't been able to stop shaking and checking over her shoulder for three days, but in the end she had gotten away with it, and her confidence soared. The next week, she did it again at a different store, using the same procedure – plan, execute, escape – and again the week after. They couldn't catch her, she was too good! They were left scratching their heads while she was snacking on sweets!

She grew bold.

Cookies were nice and everything, but that new video game Dad said he wouldn't buy her was nicer. She followed her procedure, planned, executed, and escaped, but as she had been walking out of the store someone had told her to stop. She had bolted, terrified, and when in the safety of her hideout had puked again. Just nerves, that was all; she'd take it easy for a while. She never did finish that video game – it wasn't exciting enough. After a week, she was back out, searching, planning, scheming. She'd be more cautious this time, and make sure no one saw her.

The pair of red headphones captured her desire the moment she spotted them in the store's window as she was walking by. She knew she had to have them, but also knew she couldn't pay for it and that Dad would say 'no' if she asked him. So she began planning. She'd have to be quick, but Ruby Rose was the quickest! She'd be in and out in a flash, laughing in her hideout before they knew what had happened!

Despite her confidence, her hands had been sweaty as she had meandered around the store, waiting for another customer to distract the cashier so she could get to her goal. Her hood kept her face hidden from the cameras, and she had been careful to not look too suspicious by pretending to examine other products. Then, her opportunity had presented itself: an older woman needed something from the top shelf, and the cashier was too happy to oblige. The second his back was turned Ruby made straight for the headphones. The plastic was cool and smooth against her fingers as she pulled them from the window, and she had felt her pulse quicken as the adrenaline rush of theft made her hands shake. She had turned to make her getaway...

…but had smacked directly into the cashier. He had smiled at first, beginning to ask, "Would you like to purchase that, miss?" but then noticed her hand holding open her sweatshirt and his mouth had closed.

She had been so terrified she hadn't been able to speak, merely mumbling "Umm..." before dashing towards the door. She had felt the cashier's fingers close around her hood, pulling it down and revealing her face to the world and the cameras as she bounded out the door, shoving an entering patron out of her way. The face of every person on the street flew to her, and she froze. The world felt motionless and silent until the mystifying stillness had been broken by the cashier's shouts.

"Stop her! She stole that!"

The little voice that had saved her that first time had once again whispered into her mind, Run! and she had ran. She could barely hear the sound of the cashier's footsteps clacking against the sidewalk over the deafening booms of her heart as she had pushed her legs to their limits, pumping her arms and rocketing down the street, somehow managing to avoid colliding with any of the pedestrians in her way. She had been too scared to look behind her and see if her pursuer was still after her, but the first turn of her escape route was approaching and she had known that, if she made it to that, she would escape. She'd nearly lost her balance as she took the turn too fast – her shoes had slid on the gravel that lined the pathway – but then she had been pounding down the narrow path towards the next point on her escape route. She had already been able to see it, the empty construction area at the end of the path, and had pushed herself harder to get there quicker. There was a hole in the fence on the other end that she was going to slip through, eluding any punitive force that tried to stop her.

But it was not to be. Three steps into the construction area she had suddenly felt herself falling.

Her chin stung, and her face was covered in dirt. Ruby felt that it was safe to assume her plan had failed, and that her life was over. She was caught, and soon the police would show up and arrest her for theft, and then her dad would have to pick her up from the station and she'd never be able to leave the house again.

Moving slowly, Ruby pushed herself to her knees, hissing as pain lanced through her hands, elbows, and shins from scrapes accrued during her fall. She pat her sweatshirt, relieved to feel that the headphones were still in her possession, and also felt still in one piece. Maybe she still had a chance to-

"Oh my my, that was a nasty spill, wasn't it?" a teasing voice said from above her, and Ruby froze. "What's got you in such a hurry hmm?" Brown shoes that would have sparkled but for the tan dust that coated the toes appeared in front of Ruby's head, followed by the black tip of a cane. "Well?"

Ruby pushed off the ground, hoping to get past the man blocking her path, but a hand gripped the hood of her sweatshirt and dragged her back, causing her to once again fall onto the ground.

"Ah ah, tsk tsk! I wouldn't do that again, if I were you," She heard the crunch of the man's soles against the ground as he walked to stand in front of her again, and she hesitantly raised her eyes to look at him. He was tall, wearing a white coat and a black hat with a red band, and had bright orange hair brushed so it covered his right eye. His left twinkled as he smirked down at her, crossing his arms. "What have you got there, hmm?" The man pointed at Ruby with his cane, "Come on, show me,"

Seeing no point in resisting, Ruby reached into her sweatshirt and pulled out the headphones, hanging her head as she held them up for the man to examine. She looked up again when she felt him take the headphones out of her hands. "You're not going to turn me in, are you?"

The green eye whipped back to her and narrowed. "Hmph. Get up." The man waited until Ruby stood and brushed herself off, then started walking further into the construction. "Come with me." Ruby glanced at the fence at the end of the yard. "Don't even think about it, kid. Now hurry up!"

Certain that her punishment would be worse if she tried to run, Ruby reluctantly followed after the man, feeling miserable inside. He lead her into the shade of the half-finished garage of the house being built on the lot, taking a seat on a stack of wooden planks and placing his hat on his knee before taking another look at the headphones. Ruby shifted uneasily in front of him, casting nervous glances towards the pathway outside, waiting for police officers to appear and take her away. "Umm, are you-"

"Shush! Quiet, kid, I'm thinking," Several moments passed that saw Ruby only get more nervous as she waited for the strange man to speak. Finally, he set the headphones down on the wood and leaned forward to rest his chin on his hands. "Hardly something to risk your future over, eh?" He said, nodding to the headphones, "And aren't you a little young to be a thief?"

Ruby's hand flew to her chest. "I'm not a thie-"

A raised hand silenced her protest. "Don't try and deny it, kid, I saw the whole thing. Pretty sloppy..." He leaned back against the half-completed wall, putting his hands behind his head. "Was this your first time?"

Ruby looked at the ground and shook her head. "No..."

"Oh?" The man sounded excited by the answer, and when she peeked upwards Ruby saw a hint of a smile at the corners of his mouth. "You do this sort of thing a lot?"

"No!"

"Don't lie to me, kid; I can smell a lie a mile away."

Ruby hugged herself. "Then... yes. I..." She felt tears gather in her eyes, "I steal a lot..."

"Aww, and why would a nice, sweet little girl like you steal? Didn't your parents teach you stealing is bad?"

"Yeah, but-"

"Then what, you were feeling 'rebellious'? Wanted to get back at Mommy for telling you to do your homework?"

Her hands clenched into fists and shook by her sides as she stared at the ground, and the tears of regretful guilt fell instead as tears of pain. "My mom's dead..."

"Oh... I see. My condolences." Several minutes passed where the only thing that broke the silence was the gentle breeze the brushed through the garage's framing, then the man cleared his throat. "Anyway, I won't turn you in, kid," He held up a finger at Ruby's shocked, hopeful expression, "If you do a favor for me..."

Ruby gnawed on her lip as she considered her options; the man was the only one who was here and could turn her in, but she already knew that she couldn't escape from him. It was a risk to accept whatever 'favor' he wanted her to do, but the alternative was police, possibly jail, and definitely her father finding out what she'd been up to. "What's the favor?" A wide, blinding smile split the man's face, and Ruby felt a little unnerved. The old warnings about talking to strange men came back to her, "It's not anything weird, is it?"

"Heavens, no!" the man scoffed, waving away the question as though swatting at a pesky fly, "I just need to know if you're in, or if I need to take you down to the police station..." He peeked a green eye at her, studying her carefully, "I'll even give back your headphones!"

Her heart jumped at the thought of getting away with her prize but she fought down the urge to immediately agree, taking more time to look over each side of the offer. In the end, she decided she'd take the risk in favor of her father not finding out about her after-school activities. "I'll do it."

"Ha! Perfect!" The man stood and clapped, fastening his hat onto his head, "Neo, she said she's in!"

"Neo?" Ruby raised an eyebrow, then followed the finger the man raised in response. Behind her, silently smirking, stood a short woman in a fancy-looking jacket leaning on a small umbrella. Her hair was two different colors, as were her eyes, and Ruby jumped back in surprise. "H-How long has she been there?!"

The man shrugged. "The whole time. She was the one who tripped you, kid. Now come on, we've got work to do." He lead the way out of the garage, turning right and heading for the end of town Ruby was less familiar with.

"Wha- You-!" Ruby turned to the woman, Neo, "You tripped me?"

Neo winked at her, then nodded her head to tell Ruby to get moving.

The man set the pace as they walked down back alleys and side streets, and Ruby quickly found herself getting lost. The relatively empty suburban streets she was accustomed to began to give way to identical avenues filled with cars and foul-smelling trucks that sputtered as they shifted gears along the road. She tried to keep track of how many turns they took and where so she could find her way back if she needed to, but every corner started to look the same, and she quickly realized she'd have to rely on this curious pair she was traveling with to get her home or be forced to call her father, and Dad would be very interested in knowing what she was doing all the way out here. Several times on their journey she had considered hanging back and ditching the strange duo, but she really wanted to see what they had planned. It strummed a chord in her chest that previously only stealing had been able to activate. She was excited.

Their small group eventually stopped underneath a secluded overhang next to a busy intersection, and the tall man gestured for Ruby to come close. "Okay, kid, this is it. Ready?"

"Ready for what?"

The man pointed across the street. "You see that building? It's a bank. In less than a minute a big truck is going to pull up in front of it."

"You want me to rob an armored truck? I can't do that!"

The man grinned and pat her on the shoulder. "Sure you can, kid. You know why? You're fast. Look, all you have to do is wait for them to open the back, then grab a bag, just one, and book it! Head back to where we came from, and we'll meet you there. Got it? Great! Get going!" He shoved Ruby towards the bank.

Checking both ways for cars, she quickly crossed the street, pulling her hood over her head then stuffing her hands in her pockets, hoping she looked like another average passerby. She felt nervous, more than usual – she didn't really have a plan, and had never dreamed of doing something as dangerous as this. Suddenly her father finding out about her shoplifting didn't seem so bad.

The truck arrived just as the man had said, growling to a stop in front of the bank just as Ruby was walking by, and two men hopped out of the front and moved to the back, chatting quietly to each other. Ruby kept her face forward and her pace even while her eyes roved over the truck. The back doors opened, and she had to stifle a gasp when she saw the sheer amount of bags that filled the truck. A third man dropped down from inside the truck, helping one of the first two to drag a hand cart out. Two of the guards then walked with the cart into the bank while the remainder sat on the truck's bumper, pulling a cigarette out of his pocket.

Ruby glanced at the opposite side of the street, searching for the man and Neo and hoping they'd give her a sign, some indication of when they wanted her to take the bag, but the pair had vanished. She stopped walking, feeling panic rise in her stomach; they'd abandoned her, probably heading off to report her to the police and get her arrested. She was about to give up and try to find her way home when she spotted the man walking towards her from further down the sidewalk. She opened her mouth to speak to him, but closed it when she saw him shake his head at her and wink. That was the signal!

The voice in her head ordered her, Run!

Turning towards the truck, Ruby took a deep breath and then sprinted forward. The guard sitting on the back noticed too late to stop her, and before she knew it she had a surprisingly heavy bag of money in her hand and was crossing into the street followed by shouts of indignation. A car driving down the road slammed on the brakes and honked at her, nearly causing her to lose her balance, but Ruby pressed on, barely giving a thought to what she was doing and focusing her entire attention on running as fast as she could. Getting caught definitely meant jail.

She ran, forcing her legs forward even though they ached and burned from exertion, trying to trace her way back to the construction area based on memory. Left, left, straight two blocks, right, straight, right - no, left - then straight three blocks, right, left, stop. Dragging her feet forward, she gasped in relief as she spotted the plastic-wrapped second level of the house being built, and began to make her way towards the garage. She entered into the shaded interior, panting and dripping with sweat, and collapsed onto the ground. She was exhausted, but relieved that she had managed to get back to an area she was familiar with. Now she just had to wait for the other two to show up.

They didn't take long. The first indication that they'd arrived was the man's cane tapping on the concrete floor, followed by two pairs of footsteps entering the garage. Ruby pushed herself to a sitting position, finding the duo standing over her, smiling. "Hey. I did it." Ruby said, out of breath, weakly holding up the bag of money she stole.

The man took the bag from her, handing it to Neo before crouching down next to Ruby. "Great job, kid, it worked perfectly." He reached into his coat and pulled out the red headphones, sliding them across the ground towards Ruby. "There you go, a deal's a deal." He stood, tipped his hat, said, "Good doing business with you, Little Red," then turned to leave.

"Wait!" He turned at her cry, "W-Who are you?"

The man smiled, then bowed. "Roman Torchwick, at your service," Straightening, he fixed his hat and said, "So long, Little Red, maybe we'll see you around. Stay out of trouble!" Then he left, turning in the direction they'd come from, and disappeared around a corner. A moment later, Neo scampered after him, giving Ruby a wink as a goodbye.

Ruby sat in the garage for another few minutes, trying to wrap her mind around the day's events. She'd robbed a store for some headphones, got caught, then ended up stealing a bag of money from an armored truck with her captors. Picking up her headphones, the meager reward for her great efforts, Ruby started on her way home. She wondered if she'd ever get to meet Roman Torchwick and Neo again...

…because there was no way shoplifting would ever be able to compare with the experience they had given her.

Author's Notes: I hope you enjoyed this weird little work of whimsy I whipped up. No plans to continue, but I'm leaving it open just in case.

Thanks for reading!

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