A/N: I'm very new to the Casualty fandom, so constructive criticism is very welcome! This is speed written and unbeta-ed, apologies for grammar and spelling errors.

Chapter 1

It had been over a month since the car crash which had left the Holby Emergency Department so severely shaken, and things were slowly returning to normal. Jeff's funeral had been and gone, Iain was becoming a more familiar face in the ED, and Ethan had been back at work for over a week. Despite all of this, Cal had noticed something was off.

"Did you walk back today?" He asked, as an exhausted Ethan walked into their - apparently now-shared - flat. "Or get a taxi?"

Ethan eyed his brother, taking off his coat and hanging it up. "What makes you think I did either?"

"Your car," Cal explained, gesturing to the window. "It's in dire need of a wash - some of the local kids have been writing rude words in the dust."

"Oh, God - really?" Ethan hurried to peer through the window. "Wow er- wow. I'll um- I'll clean that up I suppose..."

There was a brief silence as Ethan continued gauging the state of his car, broken every so often by him bemoaning the mentality of children. Cal watched him, considering how best to broach the subject he really wanted to confront. In the end he decided to go for the blunt approach.

"So why haven't you been driving to work?"

Ethan stiffened nearly imperceptibly for barely half a second, before turning from the window with a feigned smile. "Oh. Er, I don't know really... I suppose I was sharing lifts with you for a while and then it was just easier to walk back."

"And when we've been on different shifts?"

Ethan's smile faltered. "W-well it... er-"

"Ethan." Cal looked hard at his younger brother, whose false smile slipped away altogether. "What's going on?"

Ethan opened his mouth - perhaps to invent some other excuse - but then he took in Cal's expression and his shoulders slumped. "I've... been having some trouble."

"Right," said Cal. "Get two mugs, will you?"

"Oh. Um, sure."

Cal filled the kettle as Ethan scrabbled around in the cupboard. "So. What kind of trouble?"

"Just since the accident I've had some difficulties driving again." Ethan explained, grabbing a couple of tea bags and looking as though he would rather be having any other conversation than this one. "It's not a big issue, I've been coping."

"By walking to and from work every day?"

"Not every day," Ethan defended. "And actually I've started driving lessons. Trying to ease back into it that way."

They were both quiet for a few moments. The kettle boiled and Cal handed Ethan his tea, leading the way to the kitchen table. Once there, Ethan began to fiddle with the handle of his mug, staring at the table-cloth.

Eventually, Cal spoke. "What happened to you, a few weeks ago, it was- it was scary. I mean you could have died. So this fear you've developed is- it's normal, it-."

"I know," Ethan agreed quickly. "I know that. But the crash was over a month ago now and everyone at Holby should be allowed to move on - no one wants to hear about my problems."

"Ethan I'm usually the first to tell you when you're being arrogant, self-obsessed, stuck-up-"

"Not helping, Cal."

"-but," Cal finished, grinning, "in this instance, I'd say you've been very... um..."

"Yes?"

"Oh come on Ethan, don't make me say it," Cal moaned. "Very brave, alright?"

Ethan snorted. "I don't feel very brave."

"Maybe you do and you're just not used to it?" Cal suggested. "It's a pretty rare feeling for a swot like you after all."

"And Cal as we know and love him is back in the room," Ethan chuckled, taking a gulp of his tea. He winced. "There's far too much sugar in this."

Cal rolled his eyes, but ignored the insult to his tea-making. "How are the driving lessons going? Any progress?"

"No, not really." Ethan took another sip of his too-sugary tea. "It's um- it's a tricky situation. The instructors I've tried are..."

"What?"

"Well, they're either confused and frustrated as to why someone who already knows how to drive needs lessons," said Ethan. "Or I tell them why and they become unbearably sympathetic."

"Yeah, that's a tricky one." Cal paused, as a thought struck him. "Or maybe not..."

"What do you mean?"

A decidedly smug look made its way across Cal's face. "It sounds like all you need is a better instructor."

Ethan frowned, not getting it. "Do you know someone?"

"Me!"

"Oh." Ethan put his tea down. "Cal that's very generous of you, but I really don't think that's a good idea."

"I do," Cal replied easily, getting to his feet. "I think it's a great idea. Tomorrow morning, yeah?"

Ethan tried to protest, but Cal was already out the room.