''Okay Dean; you can do this. You can do this'' Dean mumbled for himself as he wiped his sweaty palms up and down his pants. He lifted his fist and was about to let it drop against the door; but it froze. He couldn't.

''Fuck this'' he cursed as he turned around and started to walked back towards the car. Behind him he heard how the door opened and his heartbeats started to pick up.

''Ambrose?'' Dean stopped.

''Thought it was you, what are you doing here?'' Dean didn't want to turn around but he had not much of a choice now.

''Hi Ms. Orton'' he said. His face expression made her know his intentions and just like that, the woman's mile faded away.

x x x

''So... how did it go?'' Kharma asked Dean as he entered the car again.

''How do you think it went. At least now I've done what I promised Roman'' he sighed, his gaze was empty.

''Right, and I'm proud of you…but Dean'' Kharma tried.

''I said no'' he snapped at her and she sighed.

''So you're really not going to the memorial?'' Kharma lifted a brow.

''Nope''

''And I don't need babysitting'' he added.

''Oh, but you do'' she corrected him and he snorted.

''Just drive me home'' he said tired and Kharma looked over at him.

''Fine'' she gave after; she was tired as well.

Before Dean knew it they were outside of his house.

''Thanks'' he said before stepping out. He heard how a second door opened and turned.

''What do you think you're doing?'' Dean raised a brow and looked at Kharma who had stepped out of the car.

''What does it look like?'' she gave him a look and he chuckled.

''Oh no, my house; my rules and you're not on the invitation list'' he glared at her and she crossed her arms.

''Really? Maybe it's time to adjust that list. Because the two, only, people on it ain't really going to be around anymore'' maybe the words were rough, but nobody said that the truth didn't hurt.

''The list stays'' he turned around and walked up to his door. Kharam looked after him before shaking her head.

''Then see you at the memorial'' she screamed behind him as he entered his home. Her response was a shutting door.

''Boy Elena, I'm really trying here but… it would just be easier if you were here'' she said looking at the sky before re-entering the car with a deep sigh.

x x x

''We salute you'' the flag was up and the boys stood in salute in front of the coffins.

''Dammit Dean'' Kharma sighed. She had looked everywhere for him, but he was nowhere to be found. Honestly, she didn't believe he actually wouldn't show up. She placed a rose on Elena's coffin, mumbled a prayer and finally decided to go home. She wanted to sleep.

''What the…'' she groaned as she looked on her phone screen with one eye open and one eye closed.

''He can't be serious'' she mumbled, looking at the 'Position for Dean Ambrose'-map Dean had sent her.

''God bless my soul. This is just for you girl'' Kharma pointed at the sky before stepping out of bed.

''Dean?!'' Kharma yelled, turning her phone around while it showed 'arrived'.

''Here'' she almost didn't hear it. She walked across some stones until she saw him on the ground.

''Dean, it's 2 PM'' she yelled but he didn't seem to care.

''What are you doing'' she whined, he just shrugged and pointed at the two tombstones between him. Kharma sighed and took a seat on the ground in front of him.

''Okay. Then let's do this. So do you have anything you would like to say?'' she asked.

''What would that be?'' he frowned.

''I don't know, some kind of goodbye?''

''What difference would that make? The dead can't hear us'' he snorted before he placed the whisky bottle against his lips and took a mouthful.

''I should have gone down with them'' he continued.

''But your orders…'' she tried.

''I want my family back!'' he roared which made her flinch in fear. Silence followed as they looked at one another.

''And you don't think I want that too? I lost Elena, remember?'' Kharma said a little irritaded.

''But Dean, holding on just don't make sense. They aren't coming back and...'' she continued but was cut of.

''Do you regret going?'' he asked, clearly still not listening to her.

''No, no I don't'' she replied.

''I do'' he said and she sighed.

''You don't, nobody knew this would happen. It's war''

''But was it really worth all this?'' Dean tensed his face as he pointed at the two tombstones between him.

''You can't…'' she tried again.

''But of course you should insist on going'' he continued. Kharam frowned, now she was confused,

''What ar…?''

''Bet you didn't count on this huh, you never think of the consequences you piece of shit'' he started to shake his head.

''Not that you were any better, always followed the Big Dog around. Scumbag'' Dean continued and Kharma frowned.

''So now we're here… and I guess I now have to say some bullshit like see you on the other side'' Dean lifted the bottle against the sky before taking a big mouthful of the last whisky that was left in the bottle. Silence came after that for a few seconds.

''How could you leave me'' the words came out as a breath as Dean closed his eyes. Kharma looked sad at him.

''Life's a bitch'' she now understood that he was talking to her again.

''I know buddy; I know'' she replied softly. They both looked at the two tombstones for a while before taking a big inhale. She gave him a look and lastly, he nodded.

''We salute you''

And that's the end of this story! Hope you liked it, thank you for all the reviews and feedback but I felt that it was time for this story to meet its end 3 Sorry that I killed Seth and Roman but well; it's war people.