"Pen?" Derek says, looking extremely concerned. He stands up from the bed and moves towards me, and I shrink back away from him, still completely in shock. "What did the test day?"

"I'm-I'm pregnant," I respond, unable to make eye contact with him as I move to sit on the bed, clutching the pregnancy test hard enough that my knuckles are turning white. I see Derek moving towards me again and he kneels down in front of me, grabbing hold of my hands, trying to get me to look at him.

"Pen, we're gonna be okay. This is actually pretty amazing. I wasn't ever sure that I'd be a dad at all and now I'm gonna have two incredible kids, one of whom is with the love of my life. You're going to be the greatest mom that's ever existed. Don't doubt that for a second. This is going to be the luckiest kid in the world because they'll have you as their mom. Just don't freak out, and please don't let this affect us."

"Derek," I say, not really having heard anything that came out of his mouth. "I need some time. Do you mind leaving?"

"Some time to do what?"

"Think. Process. Figure out what I'm going to do," I respond, pulling my hands out of his grasp.

"What do you mean what you're going to do?" he asks, clearly upset now, standing up and pacing the short length of the bedroom. "This is our kid, Pen. We need to be talking about what we're going to do, what the next steps are."

"Derek, I never planned on this. Hell, I never planned on any of this. You left and I was finding a way to cope. And I was going to be okay. And now you're back and I let you in and now I'm pregnant. I never planned on this. I never planned on becoming a mother. It wasn't what I saw for myself, and I'm not entirely sure that this is what I want. What I want in general, and what I want my life to become. I just-I just need some time to think things through and to process."

"Why can't we talk through it together? I know that you didn't plan for this, and I didn't either, but it's happening and I think it's an amazing thing. You and me. Having a baby. What bad could there be in that? I get that you're upset because this is shocking and new, and it is for me too, but don't throw me aside because you're scared and upset. Please, Pen, please don't do that. Let me help. Let me be here and talk this through with you."

"Derek, I just-"

"Please, Pen," he interrupts me and I force myself to look at him, and only then do I see the tears brimming in his eyes. My instincts start kicking in and I move over to him, pulling him to me in a hug that he immediately responds to, pulling me impossibly tighter to him. Being held by Derek never gets old. Something about the strength of his arms as they surround me and the outpouring of love I instantly feels being held against him gives me the courage I need to accept what's happening.

"Okay," I whisper against his chest, "let's talk about this." I feel him breathe a sigh of relief at my words, and he instantly relaxes even further into our embrace.

"Thank you," he whispers back so quietly that I almost don't hear him. I pull out of our embrace only far enough to place a soft kiss to his lips before pulling him with me to the bed. Instantly cuddling up together on the bed, we lay there staring at each other for a few minutes before either of us can think of what to say.

"Am I really the love of your life?" I find myself asking before I can think better of it.

"Without a doubt," he responds without hesitation.

"Sorry, it took me a bit to catch up on all that you said. I'm in a bit of a daze right now."

"I understand," he says. "But, you are the love of my life and once we figure things out, I'll remind you constantly just how much I love you and how excited I am to be having a kid with you. But I get that you're scared right now, so I won't talk about it."

"Thank you," I say, feeling a goofy smile come to my face.

"Can I ask you a question?" Derek asks, looking concerned again. I nod slightly and he starts talking. "Did you really mean it when you said that you never saw yourself being a mother?"

I take a deep breath before answering. "Yeah. I think because of the way my relationships of the past had been going, and my own parents, somewhere along the way I wrote it off as something that would never happen to me. I think it really hit when you left and were fathering your own child. Because at some point I convinced myself that you were the only man I would want to have children with. I mean, that's still true, but when you left, I completely gave up on the idea of kids being in my future."

"I'm sorry you felt that way. But I won't deny how happy I am to hear you say that I'm the only man you wanted to have kids with." He looks at me and his smile is as big as I've ever seen it and I know without a doubt that mine is just as big.

"I love you, Derek. I'm sorry if I seemed unhappy about being pregnant, I just don't really know how to deal with this information."

"But it's going to be okay, Pen. We'll figure it all out together. I wasn't really there for Savannah during her pregnancy, but I'm going to be here for you. And we'll work it out and figure out how to do this. I love you."