Zootopia One Shots by Anguirus1955

Disclaimer: Zootopia is owned by Disney. Personally, I think that this information is obvious, but for the sake of legal protection, I will state it anyway.

001 - Babysittin' Duty

Finnick sighed. He looked over at the small sleeping infant next to him in his van. It was a strange sight, a cross between a rabbit and a fox, but not for the obvious reasons. Instead, Finnick found it strange because the infant could easily pass for a Fennec fox such as himself, at least from a distance. The ears, though, gave away part of the child's heritage upon closer inspection. While not exactly like those of a rabbit, they were still more rounded than a red fox's ears, although their ability to move like a rabbit's ears was somewhat inhibited by their broader base. They could move alright, but nowhere near the range of the girl's mother.

The face of the child, relaxed in her slumber, was also fascinating, as it was most definitely a fox muzzle, but the very end of her maw had those rabbit-like formations, although they were subtle, but still there nonetheless. When the child had been awake, he remembered, her teeth were a fascinating display of mixed biology, with canines near the front, but with regular chewers lining the mouth in between and behind.

Foxes, of course, were omnivorous, so this wasn't too much of a surprise, but nevertheless, it was the presence of those small buck-teeth in the front, or at least what would grow into rabbit fronts sooner or later. Weird, Finnick thought to himself with a shrug of his shoulders as he sat back and listened to the jazz that Nick had insisted the young girl enjoyed.

Sure, Nick. Of course a six-month old will enjoy listening to jazz. She's a frickin' baby, she's not gonna give a damn what the genre is! Finnick sighed. The rest of the infant's body was much more like that of a fox, but with gray fur and a fluffy tail with a white tip. Oh yeah, she definitely gets that from her mother, he thought. Glancing over to his right, Finnick looked at the girl's twin brother, who was much more rabbit-like, but with reddish fur and a shorter tail, although it was still bushy. His face was shorter and rounder, more in line with a rabbit, but his ears were definitely those of a fox. His teeth were the same as his sister's, and his eyes, which were currently open and studying Finnick, were purple, like his mother.

"Uh... hi," Finnick said quietly. The male hybrid tilted his head curiously, before smiling at Finnick and panting. "Um... so, how long have, uh, you been awake?" Finnick asked the young... pup, or kit, or whatever the hell Judy and Nick called their offspring. Finnick reached for a bottle of formula and saw how the... kip eyed it. Yeah. Kip. Hybrid of words for a hybrid of species... I guess, Finnick thought to himself.

The boy's eyes widened considerably after seeing the bottle. Finnick, of course, decided to tease the poor thing first. He moved the bottle towards the kip's face, whose smile brightened in anticipation. And then, when the bottle was mere inches from the the kip's muzzle, Finnick held it there. The infant moved his snout forward as far as he could, sticking his tongue out to try to touch the nipple of the bottle.

Finnick slowly shook his head as he watched the infant tilt his head and try to lick the bottle, only to pull back before moving his head forward again, once more trying to lick the bottle in a strangely desperate yet humorous attempt to feed. Finnick smirked, which the infant picked up on, looking at him with a hopeful expression on his face. Finnick then moved the bottle forward towards the kip, whose eyes widened in anticipation. The boy opened his mouth and closed his eyes, expecting nourishment as his tongue touched the tip of the nipple, only for his eyes to shoot open in shock after the bottle was pulled away.

The kip stared up at Finnick with shock clearly written across his face, along with disbelief, as if he were saying 'Why!? How dare you!?' Finnick chuckled at the display, only to stop when he saw the tears begin to well up in the child's eyes as he began to produce a high-pitched whine. "Uh-oh," Finnick muttered before moving the bottle forward and putting it in the infant's mouth. The child greedily suckled on it with an expression of bliss on his face.

"Well, at least you aren't as finicky as your sister," Finnick said with a sigh as he looked back over his shoulder at the sleeping female. "Just keep sleeping, Vicky," Finnick said quietly before noticing that he could no longer feel the bottle in his hand. Returning his attention to the boy, Finnick saw that he was holding the bottle with both paws. "Well, aren't you a fast learner?" Finnick commented.

The boy glanced over at him with an expression that almost seemed smug, before returning his attention to his bottle. While Finnick would never say it out loud, especially not around the rabbit cop, he found the sight to be quite... cute. Then again, since these children were also part fox, perhaps he could get away with it. Eh, that's a pondering for another day, Finnick thought to himself.

Finnick was brought out of his thoughts when he heard a small whine, followed by a chirp of sorts. Eyes widening in horror, Finnick slowly turned his head to look over at Victoria, who was staring at him. She looked over at her brother, Ben, before moving her sights back over to Finnick. She repeated this process several times, glancing between the bottle in Ben's paws and Finnick, adding a whine here and there, until Finnick sighed in defeat and went to prepare another bottle.

Finnick could have swore that he saw her smile as he stood up. "You're gonna be the death of me one day. I know it," Finnick said under his breath as he opened the container of baby supplies that Nick and Judy had given him earlier this morning. "Okay, now where was that instruction packet for preparing the formula?" he asked himself rhetorically.

He had just finished preparing the formula when his nose wrinkled. "Oh no," he whispered as he turned around. He looked over at Ben, who was staring at a butterfly that had landed on his nose. Moving slightly closer to Ben, Finnick ascertained that the young buck was not the source of his newest horror. Slowly turning to look at Victoria, Finnick definitely saw a wicked grin on her face as realization dawned on him. "Well... shit," he muttered.

Several Hours Later...

Finnick awoke to the sound of knocking on his van doors. He glanced over at Ben and Victoria, both of whom were sleeping soundly. The knocking persisted. "Okay, okay, I'm coming," Finnick said as he grabbed his baseball bat and opened the doors. He lowered the bat after seeing Nick and Judy in their uniforms.

"Oh, it's just you guys," Finnick said. "Yes, and you must be Finnick," Nick said. "Oh hardee-har-har, ass-wipe," Finnick retorted. "I hope you aren't using that language around our children," Judy said with a warning tone. "Don't worry, I speak every language except English around them," Finnick replied snarkily.

Judy rolled her eyes. She had gotten used to Finnick's behavior by the second year of her marriage to Nick, since both foxes had had a slight falling out when Nick had joined the Zootopia Police Department. It was Nick and Judy's marriage five years later which had prompted Nick to begin reaching back out to the smaller fox, seeing as the only other witnesses to the duo's small and quiet ceremony were Benjamin Clawhauser and Nick's mother. "So, how are the demon-spawn?" Nick asked Finnick.

"Hey, that's my line," Finnick replied in jest. "I know, but anyway, how are they?" Nick asked his friend. "They're sleepin'," Finnick replied. Judy looked over at her two infants, both of whom were sleeping in their small detachable car seats, which Finnick had found in a dumpster and polished for the Wilde's as a gift. "I hope they didn't give you too much trouble," Judy said as she hopped into the van and gently ran her paw over Victoria's sleeping face. "Only when shittin' their pants or whining for food," Finnick replied.

Judy frowned slightly but otherwise let the comment slide. "So, tomorrow my mother comes back to town, and we can leave them with her," Nick said as he reached over and held up one of the baby carriers. "Hey, Nick, that girl of yours... she's smarter than she lets on," Finnick said. "Of course she is. She's my daughter," Nick said as he flashed a grin at Finnick.

"I know. That's why she's such a pain in the ass too," Finnick said. "Hey!" Judy said with a frown as she looked at Finnick. "What? It's true. Earlier today, when she crapped her diaper, she grinned at me. She didn't whine or cry or anything. Oh no, she fu-I mean, well, she grinned! Like she knew that I would have to deal with it. Little Ben, though... he's all right, I guess. He cries when he craps himself, so I know he doesn't do it to torment me," Finnick said.

"Don't take it personally, Fin. Vicky's just... well, Vicky," Nick said. "Yeah, well I hope you train that out of her when it comes time for her to start attending school or daycare or whatever," Finnick said. "We'll make sure they're potty trained before we ask you to watch them again," Nick said with a smirk.

"I expect you to keep that promise," Finnick said. "Of course. Have I ever broken a promise to you before?" Nick asked him. "Do you want a short list or a long one?" Finnick replied with a neutral expression. Judy had to hold in a laugh as she hopped out of Finnick's van with her son in his baby carrier... seat... thing. "Well, thanks for watching them, Finnick. Take care," Judy said as she walked over to her and Nick's beat up old jeep and strapped her son in.

"Yup, take care," Nick said as he turned away, carrying his sleeping daughter over to the car where Judy was waiting for him. Finnick watched as the couple drove away from the lot where he had parked his van, before he turned to look at the setting sun. "Winter's comin' soon," Finnick said to himself. He then turned around and froze. Nick and Judy had forgotten to take the bag of baby supplies with them. He produced a growl/sigh of irritation, only for his ears to perk when he heard the sound of tires on the ground behind him.

He turned around and saw the Wilde's jeep stopping a few meters from his van. He reached into the his van and grabbed the bag before turning around and smirking at them. Nick got out of the vehicle and walked over to Finnick. "Forget something?" Finnick asked him with a smirk. "Yes. Yes I did," Nick said. "I forgot to give baby his goodnight kiss," Nick added with a chuckle. "You know what, Nick? The next you leave those kips where with me, I'm gonna use them to run a con," Finnick said.

Nick chuckled again, before looking at Finnick in confusion. "Kips?" he asked. "Kit and pup, like how your children are, you know, hybrids? Get it?" Finnick asked him. "Huh. I guess," Nick said before reaching over to take the bag. "Ah-ah. I changed your children's diapers and fed them. I expect some kind of monetary payment," Finnick said with a grin.

Nick sighed and reached into his pocket, producing his wallet. Finnick's eyes lit up as Nick handed him two hundred bucks. "Well, Nick. Thank you," Finnick said. "No, thank you," Nick said. "Huh?" Finnick asked. "Some of that is advanced payment for the next time we drop our spawn on you," Nick said with a grin. Finnick grimaced. "Well played, Nick, well played," Finnick said with reluctant admittance of defeat.

"Well, we'll see you by the time of the Winter Solstice. Hopefully one of our... kips... will be potty trained by then," Nick said as he retrieved the bag and turned around, walking back to the jeep where his wife and children waited. "Sure, and I'll grow wings and fly all the way to Reptaelia," Finnick whispered sarcastically to himself as he watched the jeep pull out of the lot and drive away. Oh well, he only had to deal with the children for one day. Nick and Judy, on the other paw, would have to deal with them for the rest of their lives, or least the next eighteen years, Finnick realized with a grin as he hopped back inside his van. Suckers.

Fin.