AN: Typically, I like to say something about the inspiration for a story or give you a little insight to why I wrote it. This time? I honestly have no clue where this came from and I'm going to inflict it on you anyway.


"Oh, and totally don't forget to take deodorant," Thrash stressed. "Seriously dude, con funk is nothing to mess with."

"Con funk?" Nosedive frowned, not sure what his friend was talking about. He, Grin, Wildwing, and Tanya were all about to head out to Roswell for some sort of UFO Festival they had been invited to. Duke and Mallory were the lucky two who got to stay behind and deal with any crime or other issues that might pop up in Anaheim during their absence.

"Have fun," Mallory smiled and leaned backwards on the counter, elbows resting on the glass.

"Yeah," Mookie agreed. "Like, there was this one comic show I went to in LA. The elevator smelled so bad nobody would take it. Someone didn't shower and reeked big time."

"Can't be worse than the locker room after a game." Mallory stared at the pterodactyl hanging from the ceiling. "Trust me, hockey smells."

"Yeah," Nosedive's smile grew even broader as he looked sideways at Mallory. "Then again, so do you after a fight."

"Hah!" She hit him with the back of her fist, not hard enough to bruise, but enough to make her point. "I'm not the only one."

"Ow." He rubbed his arm, the smile switching to an annoyed frown. He took a step sideways to put more space between them.

"So, what else can I expect?" None of them had been to a convention before. There had been plenty back home on Anaska, but his family hadn't been able to afford to attend or send either him or his brother. None of the other ducks had ever gone either, so this would be a first for all of them.

"Um…" Thrash scratched his belly. "Food. Be sure to bring snacks. Mookie and me've done a few as vendors and a butt-ton as attendees. I don't know what it'll be like for you being a special guest. Maybe you'll get free food? Usually it's super expensive and crap. And I don't know if they'd have stuff you can eat anyway."

"It's usually hot dogs and hamburgers and shit."

"Sucks to be you," Mallory said. "I'm going to spend the—"

The bell over the door ringing interrupted her. A short woman bustled in, her black hair tied back in a neat braid.

"Monica!" The woman hurried over to the counter and began spouting off a torrent of words in Spanish. She pushed right past Mallory and set three mason jars of golden brown something on the counter.

"What the?" Mallory glared at the woman and thrust her hands up in frustration. She shook her head and moved to the other side of the counter. "Rude."

"Aye! Mami!" Mookie rolled her eyes and made shooing motions while replying too fast for Nosedive or Mallory to follow.

Nosedive raised an eyebrow and glanced to Thrash.

"Her mom." He took a step back and shrugged. Holding one hand up to block his words from the older woman, he mouthed, "She's loco."

Mookie came around the counter and tried to push the jars back into her mother's hands. Her mom held her hands up and wide, refusing to take hold of them again.

"No, I don't need these!" Mookie tried to push one of the jars into her mom's pants pocket. "I can make it myself. Go home."

"Te amo." She patted Mookie on the cheek and hurried out of the store. Before she left, she took the one jar out of her pocket and held it up, pointed to it, and set it on the rack of comics by the front door.

"What was that all about?" Mallory asked, picking up one of the jars and inspecting it. This one had what looked like nuts and raisins mixed in with the thick, syrupy liquid.

"She won't leave me alone! That's what." Mookie crossed her arms and glared at the jars. "A bunch of my family is coming up from Mexico for my brother's birthday and I volunteered to bring a dessert."

"So," Nosedive drew the word out and motioned to the jars. "What's this?"

"Cajeta." At his blank expression, she clarified. "Ever have dulce le leche?"

"Maybe?" Mallory shrugged.

"It's like liquid caramel. You put it on cake or ice cream or churros or whatever. I usually just grab a spoon and eat it."

Thrash grinned and snatched the remaining jar on the counter. He checked for any offending nuts before slipping it into his vest pocket.

"Sure, whatever." Mookie waved off her coworker. "Take it. There's probably a gallon of it at her house. You guys can totally eat it too; nothing in there that you don't eat."

"For the trip?" Mallory offered the jar she'd been holding to Nosedive.

"Totally!" Nosedive opened it and dipped a finger in, eager to try it. He licked the gooey substance off and nodded appreciatively. "This stuff is awesome."

"Gross." Mallory and Mookie shared a commiserating glance at his behavior. "Now I don't want any."

"Take the one by the door," Mookie suggested. "I'm not going to use it."

"Okay, thanks."

The bell above the door rang again and Wildwing stuck his head in.

"Nosedive! Come on, grocery trip before we hit the road." He waved to Thrash and Mookie before giving his brother another stern look.

"Gotta go. See ya later guys!"

"Bye, Dive!"

"I should go with them," Mallory moved towards the door, one hand up in farewell. "Make sure they don't buy half the store again." She picked up the last jar of cajeta and paused before following the Flashblades. "Thanks!"

0000

Nosedive tried to focus on the task of packing. They'd be gone five days and it wasn't even like they'd be traveling from one place to another like they did for a series of away games. After having spent a year traveling for the NHL, packing usually went pretty quick.

"Ooh, boy." He grimaced and rubbed his churning stomach. He'd eaten half the cajeta in one sitting, enjoying every bite. But his stomach? Yeah, not so much. Maybe he should have rationed it.

His guts audibly gurgled as they twisted in knots again. Nosedive took off for the bathroom.

This was not the best way to get out of an appearance, but he'd take it.

0000

Nosedive sprawled across the couch, one arm over his eyes and one leg half off the blue sofa. Cheesy, 50's era sci-fi monsters rampaged across the television screen. A mostly finished two liter of ginger ale, several empty yogurt containers, and a jar of bentonite clay littered the end table and floor.

Duke crossed his arms and looked down from behind the couch. Well, this wasn't going to work.

"Hey!" Mallory came in through the elevator door, a bag of carry out in hand. "Sorry I'm late. Those assholes at the—" She stopped when Duke motioned for silence. Confused, she shifted to walk silently forward and see what he pointed to. "Oh, great."

Duke shrugged.

"I thought he was supposed to be in New Mexico with the others."

"I dunno." Duke didn't seem perturbed. "Kid musta done something to get out of that convention."

Mallory sighed her frustration and glanced to the ceiling for patience. Finding none, she too crossed her arms. The bag of food swung at the motion, tapping her side repeatedly.

"So… Now what?" Mallory kept her voice low so as not to wake the sleeping teenager.

"Eh. My room or yours?"

"Ugh. I wanted to watch a movie and eat in here."

"Yeah, that wasn't all you wanted to do in here," he smirked.

"It's one in the morning! If he's still here, why isn't he at least in his own bunk?"

"What? At least we know he's here instead of being surprised in the morning or something." Duke exhaled forcefully through his nose. "Okay, fine. We reschedule for next week?"

"No." Mallory shook her head, refusing to let Nosedive ruin her fun. "We already missed last week because of that robbery."

"That don't count. We made it up Saturday after practice."

"That," she stressed the word, "Was taking advantage of an opportunity that presented itself." She drummed her fingers against her still-crossed arms. "Damn it, Nosedive."

"Hey, come on, sweetheart. It's a big base. We can just leave him here. Go to my bunk, eat, watch a movie…" He tilted his head suggestively. "Then, maybe…"

"Ooh?" Mallory matched his smirk. "Then maybe, what?"

"I dunno. Little allopreening, little something else."

"Hm. I like the sounds of that. But we're going to my bunk. You know I hate your couch."

"Fine with me." He offered his arm, "Shall we?"

She rolled her eyes and slapped his arm away.

"Don't get any ideas about what this is."

"I'm not. Just trying to be polite."

"Fine." Mallory turned and sauntered towards the exit closest to the bunks. "You coming?"

"Right behind ya, sweetheart."

As soon as the door closed, Nosedive sat upright and stared at it. He didn't even bother trying to hide his growing smile. Who knew a short lived stomach bug could be so informative?