DISCLAIMER: One Piece belongs to Eiichiro Oda.

~ Overboard ~

"We're pirates, not a daycare center!" Buggy shouted, upon discovering that his crew had smuggled a small child aboard the ship. "You can't just adopt some random orphan off the street!"

"We can, and did," Alvida replied calmly. "Besides, we've already set sail. What are you going to do, throw him overboard?"

Buggy glared at the little boy.

"Eek!" the child shrieked, and ran to hide behind Richie. The lion growled at Buggy.

The captain sighed. "Alright, fine. I won't throw the brat overboard. But we're dumping him on the next island!"

And, with that, he stormed off to his cabin and slammed the door.

When the captain ventured out on deck later that day, most of the crew was gathered around Alvida, who had the child on her lap.

"Who's nice and fluffy?" she asked.

"Richie!" the toddler replied excitedly, pointing to the lion.

"And who else?"

The child's forehead scrunched up in concentration as he looked tried to think of the answer. He looked at the pirates gathered on the deck.

"Mohji!"

"Right," Alvida said.

The child laughed and clapped happily in response.

"And who has a big red nose?" she asked.

The rest of the crew became awkwardly silent at this question. Even though they didn't know that their captain happened to be standing behind them right at this moment, they did know how sensitive he was when it came to the subject of his nose - especially if anyone mentioned how big, round, or red it was.

"Buggy!"

The kid was pointing right at him. Buggy was tempted to throw him overboard despite his earlier statement to the contrary. Instead, he turned around and went back into his cabin, slamming the door behind him once more.

"Who's got a big red nose?"

"Buggy!"

"Who's your favorite person?"

"Hmm. Richie!"

The female pirate sighed. She wasn't sure the kid was old enough to understand that lions weren't people even if she were to try explaining it to him, so she decided to switch tactics.

"Can you say 'Alvida'?"

The child dutifully repeated the name, although it came out sounding more like "Owl Peeta".

"Eh, close enough," she said. "Now, can you tell me who's the most beautiful woman in the world?"

"Boa Hancock!"

At this pronouncement, Alvida promptly tossed the child overboard.

~end~