Tap, tap.

Heavy rose petals danced around him. They beared the color of passion, so similar to his own carmine strands. He closed his eyes for a second, then released breath he had been holding.

'I'm ready' he thought. He opened his eyes, and then he realized. What danced around weren't petals; it was blood.

Tap, tap, tap.

Blood was dripping down his palms, making him feel him and tainting the grass before him. He looked at the Rocket grunt before him, knife blade straight in her heart. Expresionless, her lifeless eyes staring unseeing at the gray, kissed by the dusk sky before her.

Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe.

He will never know her name. He will never know if she had a family, or a dear person to come back to. She died, taking story of her life with herself.

And not only this.

Sneasel.

He wasn't ready. His head just refused to twist but he knew he had to. He had to.

Sneasel. She took him down with her. Her death won't bring him back. He didn't want to accept this reality. He just wanted to run, run, run, to the place where nothing hurts. Where the scent of blood didn't make him want to throw up, where wide trees of Ilex Forest didn't mock his pained features and tear stained face. Where he still had someone to live for.

Tap, tap, tap.

It was all over now. But he couldn't accept it, he couldn't.

Still, he had to act. Act fast.

He wasn't ready.

But still, with one quick glance, he took his dead friend into his arms, running away. Tears blurring his vision, blood making him feel dirty, he ran.

'I couldn't save you. Forgive me, Sneasel.'

He was weak, weak, weak. So very weak. He couldn't protect his only friend, his only reason to stay alive.

It was already dark out. Not a single person could be seen on the streets. Good. He made his way towards Mt. Silver. Sneasel was born there and loved this place. Sometimes, when he was sad, he pointed his claws towards snowy mountain that could be seen from the distance. The neverending hail - that could seem dangerous to some people or even Pokémon - brought him happiness and feeling of home every single time. He made it to the freezing cave near the top of the mountain and looked at the scene. The world before him, snowy trees, pure clean snow, shining stars, they were so beautiful, so pure they sickened him. Why couldn't the world suffer with him? Why death of someone so precious was left unsaid, as if it never meant anything to begin with? He looked at Sneasel. His beautiful ruby eyes were closed. Forever. His fur was stained with crimson petals. He was smiling.

Silver eyes blinked, gloved hands rubbing away the tears as new ones continued to form. Heart open, mind broken, he took his friend to his arms. He embraced every frostbite pain in his arms and legs as he lied down. He knew what's waiting for him. But he didn't care. Nothing mattered. Not anymore, he decided, as he felt cold blood stain his clothes and skin on his cheek. But it didn't make him feel sick. Not anymore. The cold made him numb, numb until he couldn't feel. He knew he will never wake up again. He'll never see another sunset. It was okay.

So he thought. But then, he opened his eyes.

What? He wasn't hurt and he couldn't smell blood. He couldn't see Sneasel. He wasn't even on Mt. Silver anymore. he was in bed. Someone's bed. He looked around. The room he was in seemed simple but pretty. There was a TV and a desk with PC on it placed pretty close to each other. On a wooden floor, there was a small blue carpet and a single flower in the far edge of the room for decoration. On the other side of the room, there was a single window with green curtains; a forest could be seen from it.

He was alive. Or so he thought. He pinched himself, the faint pain reassuring him that this is reality. This is reality, and Sneasel wasn't here to make it feel right anymore.

It didn't hurt. Not really. He couldn't feel anything anymore. If someone asked him to picture his state of mind right now, it would be an empty box. He didn't have the will to get away, so he just stayed where he was and looked at bedsheets before him. At last, he lied down and stared at wooden floor before him until sleep has taken control of him again.

When he woke up once more, the sky had color of a warm afternoon and... He wasn't alone anymore. Next to his bed, there was a chair. A cerain boy sat on it, golden eyes examining him with an expressionless face. He knew that boy. He had been a nuisance ever since the day he met him, with his social Butterfree attitude and mighty speeches about trust, joy and friendship every single time they battled. Gold.

But this look, it didn't fit his usually cheerful face and honey coated smile. Raven haired boy looked like he wanted to say something but couldn't find the right words to, taking in deep breath and opening his mouth, only to exhale and close it a short while after. At last, Gold just took his hand, and Silver let him. Not like it mattered, anyway. Nothing had a meaning anymore. The silent agreement from Silver was empty, just like his eyes of steel.

"I brought you some food," Gold said finally, handling him a plate that had some neatly chopped berries on it. When Silver made no move to grabe it, Gold just placed it on his bed.

"Silver..." it was hard for Gold. Why wasn't he saying anything? Why wasn't he asking questions? Why wasn't he thanking him for saving his life? He was a hero, after all.

Silver turned his head towards the other trainer. He was looking at him with lifeless eyes and it didn't look like he was going to speak anytime soon.

The whole matter seemed so delicate, so scary, that he didn't know how to bring up the subject. He remembered finally beating Red and officially becoming not only a champion of Johto, but also champion of Kanto. He remembered his joy and high fiving his brave Typhlosion to celebrate their victory. He remembers Red's usual silence, this time followed by a small smile and a nod of his head. He remembers going down the mountain, ready to tell his mom about something that felt like the biggest achievement in his life and... finding Silver in one of Mt. Silver's caves, clinging to a body of a Sneasel... bloody body of a Sneasel, insides out. This scene was terrifying and he had no idea what to do, what to say.

They sat like this for a while, not daring to say a word. Gold looked at the clock in his room and realized how much time had passed. Half of an hour. He decided that it would be best to call it a day, and try to get Silver to talk one more time tomorrow. He begain rising from his chair, and then, he could hear it.

"How could you..."

Silver's voice was quiet. Quiet and raspy. Even with silence in the room, it was very difficult to make words out of his murmurs. But not impossible, Gold thought, although it didn't make things any easier.

Storm was coming.

"How could I what? I saved your life, Silver! Me and Exbo brought you here all the way from Mt. Silver, treated your frostbites with mom, which were pretty bad by the way, just for how long have you been there?! Well, nevermind. Then I put you in my own bed, sleeping on the couch myself. I brought you food, and 'how could you' is all I get in return?!" Gold's biting words burned with anger. He had the right to be angry, after everything he's done for Silver.

Right?

"Well, nobody asked you to! I wanted to stay there! You ruined it, you ruined everything..." Silver was perfectly ready to cry, his chest raising up and falling back down at close to impossible speed. His words and his voice were falling apart.

"Where is Sneasel?! Tell me, where is he! How could you take him away, you son of a-" he wanted to continue yelling, he wanted to bestow all sorts of curses upon the Johto champion, and oh, he would, but Gold's right hand suddenly covering his mouth tightly and left hand holding his shoulder in a firm grip made it hard to struggle, combined with lack of food and emotional exhaustion. It was worth a try, anyway.

"Listen to me! I helped you, I saved you! Sneasel couldn't be helped anymore, he..." his voice broke for a moment in the middle of his sentence. He wasn't brave enough to continue what he was going to say, so he decided to move the subject in another direction. "...I should be the one to ask questions! What happened? When I found you in such state, my stomach just flipped, I was scared it was too late for both of you... I want to help, and I've been doing my best to help you all this time too! So tell me, Silver!"

"Shut up!" Silver's scream could beat Exploud's yells for sure, and at the back of his mind, Gold was grateful his mom has gone shopping, although he was mostly focused on the fact that Silver broke from his grip and pushed him on the bed, looking down at him.

"Shut up, shut up, shut up!" eyes of steel were filled with fury, sorrow and betrayal. His pale hands clawed at Gold's shoulders, making him wince and hiss.

"You're not helping! I wanted to be dead, you bastard! You hear me?! What was happening back then was exactly what I wanted, and you ruined it! Why do you always have to appear out of nowhere and ruin my plans?! What makes you think you can make decisions about my life, and have enough guts to try to make decisions about my death! Who the hell do you think you are?!"

More screams, so loud Gold's ears were aching and his eyes were wide. And then, nothing else was said. Loud sobs filled the room, hot tears falling on Gold's neck and clothes. Gold took a deep breath and closed his eyes, then opened them again to look at the tear strained face of his rival.

Tan hand moved up a bit and rested on Silver's cheek; slowly, gently, he made it to brush some of Silver's red strands.

Color of passion.

"Are you okay now?" quiet, delicate voice. It didn't match Gold, Silver thought. Not like it matters, anyway.

"... I don't know."

And this response was better than nothing.

End of chapter I

Okay guys, I'm back!

I didn't really see the way to continue my previous story, Locked Boy (Tomoka, if you are reading this: I'm sorry!), since all of my ideas usually end with one chapter. I plan to make this one a two-shot though, so I guess this is okay enough?

I'm sorry if it seems chaotic, all my betas currently struggle with their exams (good luck!) and I'm trying to manage without them. I checked this fanfic for possible typos and all other things but if you still see some things being wrong in here, please tell me!

And of course, thank you for reading this crap, I hope to see you all in the next chapter!