To Thee with LOVE

My emotions started pouring in the cardiac chamber and very soon, my blood too, started carrying the emotions of profound nervousness with it by eliminating all the holy reserves of oxygen from it. What was the specialty of reacting like this? I started wondering and questioning to myself. Would she be possibly remembering me from the last time I met her? Would I be able to recognize her? Has she been left with any memory or affection towards me? Or now I stand no longer to her than possibly a penny?

"Mr. Harker… she is asking for you." said an attendant of barely 19, "Room no. 157 sir… please help yourself."

"Sure… don't worry… I will make my way till there. Thanks anyway." I said as I made on my moving.

Now every step I took seemed to cost me a great test of my courage. With the onset of every step of my self-helped efforts, I was appearing braver than the first Everest scalers. The prize of conquering the Everest is a reserved place in history but to my desires of completing my task, only suits the prize of winning her love.

"Room no.-157" read the name plate hung on the front door. I swallowed the last remains of my throat's encouraging secretion before making my next move. I thought of many self-created plans before making my visit here. But right now I seriously doubt their effectivity and probability.

"Richard is that you?" came a voice piercing through the atmosphere and vessels of emotions started pouring down my senses. For a moment I felt as if I was in the middle of nowhere but in the second moment I was having a hard time struggling my senses, now dominated by my emotions. The voice seemed to be wearied off but never did it loose its usual sweetness… the reason for which I did adore it. As the pressure of the given atmosphere started forcing my emotions from outside, the inward premises were affected by my struggling memories which were seriously affecting me from within. The philosophical description can be better expressed as if enough to create a parameter.

Finally I gathered my courage, hatred and aggression to deal with my emotions and produce enough energy to reply. "Yes… me it is… what's it to you lady?"

"Seems that my Richard is still the same… still angry with me, aren't you?" was her rather nonchalant reply.

Now it was too hard not to break down. Her every tone sustained that power to effect and affect me at the same time. Sure enough she is the beauty that killed my beast just at the time it was developing in me at a very tender age. But then I was no one to accept a defeat. May be she is my Goddess, but she got to understand the emotions of this priest of hers.

Realizing the unusual moments of gap I prattled, "Seems my memory wasn't washed off yours… or is it so that your dignity for the present time being needs my shadow?" I spat the words with all the unkind be-wilderness I can manage for that time being.

But she just laughed a gentle smile - a smile that seemed to radiate hope as if offering water to a travel-wary and rather thirsty traveler of the deserts. Having her fai share of her time she finally said, "Yes I do need you but not your shadow, and not for protecting my dignity either, but for earning a reason for living."

"Rachael… I was wondering that what on earth did bring you up to here?" I asked.

She replied in a tired tone, "A chapter of the book my life suggested my presence to be here. May be, as you may consider it… a penalty of my betrayal."

A storm of my flashbacks started blowing in my day of the betrayal, the acknowledgement of it by me… and especially above all… my self-helped reaction to this occurrence.

Realizing the overtime silence she continued, "Know what? I just love it when you acknowledge my identity." I remained all dumb-silent. I was too much eager to run to her and weep out all my inself-deposited tragedies. She happens to be the only one I can even trust after a betrayal. "Will you ever forgive this soul which stands as a criminal and begs to you for thy mercy?" A simple drop of tear which I failed to help started travelling right down my right eye, furnishing in its way all the secrets I was trying to hide from her, though in vain. I lost it all now and went right next to her on my knees and buried my head in her lying body. I was weeping all out. "Rest your aching heart in me whenever you need. Remember if you need, I am to be only found, and if you disgust, then I need to be necessarily found." She said while patting my head.

Noticeably to my audible pair of ears, her voice was growing weaker. She continued with an even weaker tone, "To all my properties you stand as the heir, but to the property of my heart… you always did and you always will, rule as the master. You are the best I ever had. " Now it was all with an whisper that she said, "RICHARD… I AM ALWAYS INCLINED TO THEE WITH LOVE."

No sooner had her voice been broken, than a beam of a high pitched sound started piercing through the air. As I struggled to re-establish my head above my neck, I realized the presence of her hand on my head. Upon raising it further I witnessed her eternal smiling face with eyes unusually opened and looking at my direction. Then I paid attention in trying to search the source of the sound and didn't take long to me to pay my vision's focus on straight moving lines.

Tears started racing down my face now. I was hearing the violent footsteps of the supposed arriving doctors. Then I laid my head back to her rather cold lap and watched my mum getting estranged to her death but with an oddly satisfied smile featuring on her rather pale face.

To this day I shall never forget that glow of death she emitted. I recall mum always saying, even before my proper attaining of my senses, that Death shouldn't be denied or stalled for it will prove that you are rather fearful or ashamed of your Earthly deeds to face your judgement day. Even till this day I recall her saying to me in her harmonious voice -

"Live a proud life my son and choose wisely your actions such that you may bear your consequences. And then you shall never fear death for you will be embracing him as your long-lost friend." …