R&R

Just Live Right

"You just need to live right."

Preface

He hadn't been lying, when he told Ushio he was full.

His life had always been full of despair, of sorrow, and anger. The times he had ever even felt a shred of happiness were miniscule, and vastly overshadowed by all the darkness that had filled him. For so long he had thought hatred was the only feeling he could feel, until he met them. Rama, and his sister. The thought of hating them has felt so wrong, so absurd and impossible.

But once more, his selfishness ensured the demise of the happiness he had finally found.

He had placed them above others, and he had paid the price. If he had stayed, if he had protected everyone, then maybe they would have lived. He would have lived. Lived to live right, to be the human he hadn't thought he'd been.

But instead, his selfishness and anger had bred the ultimate evil, and he had been cursed to live with the repercussion in the form of a demon, the demon he had always thought himself to be.

How ironic.

And even more ironic, was that only as a demon would he understand all that he didn't as a human. What it meant to accept, to protect, to put others before yourself. He saw in Ushio the good of mankind, all that he had overlooked as a human full of hatred for his kind. And only then did he begin to see the world with new eyes.

It was only until he met Ushio, that he truly stopped being a fool…

The battle was over, and as he was surrounded by the comforting golden glow, he knew his time had finally come.

Finally… he could rest.

He would join Hakumen in eternal sleep, a sleep that should have happened millennia ago.

Finally, he could leave this world with no regrets.

And as memories flashed before his eyes, as the last of his energy slowly melted away with the glow that enveloped him, one more memory overtook him.

She was smiling, that brilliantly stupid smile of hers as she leaned in to touch his nose with a finger.

"Oh, come on, Tora-chan. You still haven't learned my name? It's Mayuko. Inoue Mayuko."

Come to think of it… she'd been another human to open his eyes. One that was always putting others before herself.

He finally understood what she had meant, when those monsters had asked why some humans died with a smile, what it meant to draw the short end of the stick.

"I'm sure those people had something more important to worry about."

Here, at the end of his long life. He was one of those people. As he smiled at Ushio, he had never been more content.

Yet…

When he thought of her, he felt a twinge of regret.

'Sorry Mayuko. It looks like I won't be able to keep those vows after all…'

As darkness began to overtake him, he tried to hold onto those last few memories.

"I just want to walk through the quiet city with you…"

The warmth of her smile.

"I think it'd be great if you were human, Tora-chan…"

The piercing look of her eyes.

"Then Asako, Ushio-kun, you, and I could all go on a date together…"

The feel of her hands on his fur.

"I'll buy you lots of hamburgers, okay?"

The strength of her embrace.

"And we can go see an anime movie…"

The comfort of her presence.

"I'll even knit you a scarf…"

The kindness of her words.

"I'll peel apples for you…"

The love for her friends.

"Do you like sweets?"

The unyielding stubbornness.

"I'll bake you a cake, too…."

The silent understanding.

"And then you'll let me ride on the back of your bicycle…"

"Let's go to all kind of places…"

"You said you were going to eat me, right? You'd better eat me, no matter what! I don't want you to go away before you eat me."

'It looks like I won't be able to eat you either... what a failure of a monster I am…'

"Tora-chan… I love you. I love you lots!"

'Why do you even love me?'

"It seems I'm the fourth Okayume-same. So when Hakumen goes to sleep, I guess I'm going to live a long life and watch over it too."

'Ahh, that's right. That's when I realized it…'

"Hey Tora-chan… Even after a hundred years… maybe two hundred… you'll still protect me, won't you?"

Because how could he… how could he let her sacrifice herself once more… for the monster he had been responsible for?

Yes… there was something more important to worry about. Something beyond him and his own selfishness. His own pride. His own guilt.

She was more important. Ushio was more important. Those alive were more important. They were all bigger than him. Bigger than him and his own foolish mistakes. He was stuck in his own past. But they all still had a future. A future he refused to let be taken away by Hakumen. The creature he had created.

And that's why… as the darkness began to engulf, as the knowledge that he had protected that very future cleansed his soul… he was content.

'Thank you Ushio. Thank you Mayuko. I'm sorry… that I wasn't able to say goodbye. I'm sorry I wasn't able to keep all my promises… I'm sorry I couldn't give you everything you wanted and everything you deserved. And thank you… for loving me for who I was. Foolish monster and all…'

"…Tora."

"Wake up… Tora."

"You are not dead just yet…"

As consciousness began to return to him, so did a certain warmth. This warmth was unfamiliar to him, odd in a way he could not describe. It was not something he had never felt before, but it made him feel more energized and alive than he had ever felt as human or demon.

"W-what… I'm… not dead?"

He had been sure he had died. He had felt his own life force disappear. How could he still be alive? Had it all been a dream?

"Shagaksha. Nagatobimaru. And as you now prefer… Tora…"

As Tora opened his eyes, the light with which he was greeted with was almost blinding, and he had to squint to be able to look on. Through the light, he was able to see the outlines and shapes of something, but he couldn't tell whether they were human or demons. Yet… something told him they weren't either. The feeling that radiated from them was beyond both human and demon. It was an almost overpowering presence that left him frozen and awed all at once.

"Who are you?"

His voice sounded strange to his ears... it wasn't the usual gruff and raspy voice he was used to hearing for the past thousands of years. And yet, it wasn't unfamiliar either. There was a sense of familiarity to it, but one he couldn't quite place.

"We are beings of Life and Creation, Death and Destruction. And we have brought you here to offer you a second chance."

Confusion filled his being, and millennia of distrust caused him to frown at the words.

"Eh, what the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Tora, you have undergone a trial that no one before you has undergone, and have been robbed of a life due to our own negligence of the creature that became known as Hakumen no Mono. And yet, thanks to you and those united thanks to you and the boy known as Ushio, you have protected the very existence of your world. As thanks, and our own form of compensation, we wish to do something we have never done before. If you wish to accept, you will be able to rejoin the world you left. Not as the demon known as Nagatobimaru, but in the human form you were never able to live like you wanted. We offer you a second chance, to live as a human."

Tora felt a pang in his chest, a mix of what he recognized as fear and longing. For some reason, he knew that those words were not lies. The previous distrust faded the more that these beings talked. A part of himself knew that they were the reason he was able to believe everything they said, but something also told him that it was okay to believe them.

Still, what they were suggesting was no small feat.

They were willing to give him his life back. Just as he finally thought he would be able to rest… they were giving him the chance to return. Return to the world that he considered hell for so long, the world that made him experience only hatred until those last moments. To return would mean that he would have to face all the ugly that came with such an imperfect world…

But…

Would that also mean that he would be able to see them again?

"If you give me this second chance… what would it mean? When and what would you return me to?"

The beings were silent, and Tora gasped as he felt as if something cold and hot had entered his very being, and a sudden tightness in his chest overcame him, only this tightness was not painful, at least, not in an uncomfortable way. Before he could help it, memories flashed through his head, memories both old and new, throughout the entire time of his existence. His childhood, his rise to a hero, his first smile, his first loss. He saw the years spent fighting Hakumen, felt the despair, the anger, the regret. He remembered the time spent pinned by the spear, felt himself grow colder and colder the more he relived his life those 500 years, until he felt as if he no longer had a heart. Only for that frozen heart to thaw throughout the adventure spent with a mere teenage boy and the allies and companies they made throughout. He remembered it all, even the point at which he felt his life force slip away from him.

The experience was over as fast as it began, leaving him breathless and with a strange feeling of yearning.

"You will exist in the body you were born into, but rather than your first name, you may continue to be known as Tora. You will be able to walk among the friends you made in your final battle, but they will not remember you. They will know only that they lost a dear friend and companion, but they will have no clear recollection of the demon known as Tora."

Tora frowned, his newfound heart and soul torn at the decision given to him. A part of him craved the rest and peace that death would finally give him… but… as he thought back to t

hem, back to her, and all the promises he had failed to fulfill… the yearning in his heart returned.

And he knew.

He knew what his decision would be.

And he couldn't help but wonder if this made him selfish or selfless.

Maybe it was a little of both.

Still… he knew what he would do.

"I'll accept your offer."

A/N: Ahh, here we are, first installment! As promised. I have a lot planned for this story I just hope I can have enough time and muse to keep up considering the load I have already with life. Please let me know what you think and feel free to let me know what'd you like to see in Tora's new life!