How to (Be) Tame(d) (By) A Fox

"Yahallo Yukinon!"

"Yo."

"Ah. You're already here. Good afternoon Yuigahama-san. And welcome back Hikigaya-kun."

Welcome back indeed. I haven't been in this room for a long time afterall. You see, after waking up from my long slumber (which was on my fifth day on that hospital), I had to stay at the hospital for three more days because of the several tests that have to be conducted on me, all of which were supposed to help me on my road to recovery.

After being discharged from the hospital (which was on my 8th day there), I still have to take time off from anything because, as you'd expect of someone who's been stabbed (literally), I still have to recover even if only partially. I know I may not be normal by society's standard, but by biological standards, I am perfectly normal. Even with these dead-fish eyes of mine.

I'm still human you know? My body still needs to take some time for it to fully recover you know? It's not like I'm some kind of mutant who has a body that can repair itself from almost all kind of damage in just a matter of seconds (even if it would really be awesome if I had such trait, not that I always put myself in harm's way anyway) you knowwww? [1]

And so, I have been away from school (and any activities related to it, which includes attending the service club of course) for almost a month. Which is a pretty huge amount of time considering that a school year only lasts for 10 months (at most). That's almost a tenth of the school year that I have already missed.

…

What? I can do proper math if I put my mind into it. Seriously, don't go Yukinoshita on me now.

Anyway, I would have preferred to miss the whole school year altogether. I mean, I have no intentions whatsoever of joining Japan's workforce. To work is to lose is my mantra afterall. School is just a venue where society can groom the young ones into becoming a regular functioning member of, welp, you guessed it, SOCIETY. Which isn't necessarily something I'm aiming for. But alas, I cannot just skip school no matter how pointless it may appear to be.

See, my ultimate dream is to become a full-time househusband. And for that to have a chance of becoming reality, I need to go to school.

And would you please stop it with those doubtful eyes of yours? I'm not just spouting some bullshit you know.

…

Who am I talking to again?

Anyways, to continue my point, in order for me to advertise myself as househusband material, I need to build up some credit. By that, I mean credentials. I must be able to advertise myself as someone smart, capable (of doing housework, and satisfying my future wife's needs *wink*), and investment-worthy. If you were a woman who's loaded and has the power to snag any guy as your husband, would you even consider marrying a worthless good-for-nothing? Nope. Nada. 108% no. Even I wouldn't date me if I was a good-for-nothing. And that's saying something considering I truly, wholeheartedly, 108% completely love myself.

And so for that reason, I had to resume going to school.

That and Hiratsuka-sensei threatened to punch me. Specifically on the part of my body that was stabbed. And she would do it more than once. More than twice. More than thrice even! I'll do it over and over until you've learnt you're lesson she said.

Can someone just please take her already? So that she could be physical with someone else? Please?

No?

Then that would mean that I'd be the one taking her!

…

Hmm, come to think of it, having to marry her isn't really a bad thing. I mean, she certainly is beautiful. She's loaded (Pun intended?). She has that car. She has the body of a goddess. And she's got a well-paying job. We even have the same interests. She's definitely waifu-material in my eyes. And if I do marry her, I get to get live my dream of becoming a househusband!

But wait.

Didn't she want me to give up on my dream of becoming a househusband?

Oh, so maybe that's why I'm not really keen on the idea of marrying her.

Welp, back to the drawing board.

….

Which is why I am back here, in this clubroom where I spent most my afterschool club hours for the past year and more. I am here of my own accord. I was not forced to go here. Certainly not by a single sensei. Certainly not because of her threat, or threats rather, nuh-uh-uh.

Jokes aside, let' go back to the present: me being reacquainted with the service club clubroom that, even though I don't want to admit it, has made a place in my heart. A place where I feel that I can be myself. A place where I can find snippets of the genuine thing that I've sought for.

I'm not one to be sentimental. But hey, if you've been away from something that you consider precious, you can't help but feel sappy when you reunite you know? Even I, the one they call the Monster of Logic (though I'm not sure if that still applies to me now), can be emotional too.

...

"I'm back."

Even with my long absence, things at the club were still as usual. It may have to do with the fact that the two girls have been visiting me while I was still in recovery. But it's not like they come over everyday though. They do visit enough times for me to be able to be up-to-date as to the class lessons (we're on the same year afterall), and the service club. Requests were still coming even with my absence, but they would always consult me whenever the requests became, as Yuigahama would describe it, too deep for the both of them.

The same can't be said for a foxy kouhai of mine though. But that's another story that I am not willing to tell for now.

"So Hikki, how does it feel to be back?" asked the service club's resident bimbo.

"Wonderful. I get to see Totsuka-tan again afterall." was my enthusiastic reply. Unexpectedly, it was met by silence.

Now, I really have no idea why that would be their response. I mean, who wouldn't be glad to see Totsuka? I know right? Totsuka is such a ray of sunshine that it would be criminal to not be enthused by even the sight of him! Certainly Totsuka is enough reason for my enthusiasm just now!

"Gross Hikki." Yuighama finally verbally responded.

"I see that nothing about you has changed." as did Yukinoshita who decided that it was time for her to join in on the conversation. Oh, and I should mention that she said that while massaging her forehead as if she's having a headache.

"H-hey. What's wrong with being glad to be able to see Lovely My Angel Totsuka-tan again?" Honestly, I was hurt by their reactions.

"You've made it even worse!" Yuigahama cried, disappointment even made more apparent on her expression.

"Please stop displaying such deplorable behaviour Hikigaya-kun. It reminds me that even with whatever effort we've put into correcting you, you still haven't improved, and that makes me question my capability." doubled-up Yukinoshita as she donned a much sourer look on her face than usual.

Okay now I'm really hurt. Here I gave them an honest answer and an honest question, yet what they give back to me is this? What is with this two? Didn't they know the philosophy of Equivalent Exchange?

…

Whatever. It's not like I'd be able to change their minds anyway. Even if I give a very compelling argument as to why they're wrong and why I'm right. Seriously, why am I still associated with these two again?

"Yeah yeah. Anyhoo, what was that about me not having changed at all Yukinoshita? It's not like I'd suddenly change just because I've been hospitalized." And it's not like I've been hit in the head. Now if I was hospitalized because of that, I might be questioning myself too.

"Well, you're not wrong about that." Whoa. Yukinoshita accepted my argument. I expected a retort, not agreement! She's… she's confusing me! One minute she's against you, the other she's with you. How am I supposed to understand her?

"But I expected some sort of change from you considering you've been absent for a number of days."

Well, she's not wrong either. Usually, when someone's been away for some time, they might have been some changes that said someone has gone through. Granted, these changes are, most of the time, small ones like a change in hairstyle or mannerisms, but with that someone being gone from your presence in a long while, one can't help but have an image of said someone ingrained on one's brain. Said image will obviously be said someone's self before his/her absence. And so, because of that, there will be changes that will be noticed even if said someone won't.

But, there's a big BUT here.

"Well, even if I did change," not like I did really "it's not like you would notice."

As expected, that statement of mine garnered confusion from both my companions.

"What do you mean?" asked Yukinoshita while slightly tilting her head. Please don't do that. It's cute and makes my heart skip a beat.

"Yeah Hikki. What do you mean by that?" followed-up Yuigahama, also slightly tilting her head. Although, it didn't affect me as much as Yukinoshita's because, well, she does it too often that I've become accustomed to it.

But anyway, enough of introspection. Let's give these girls their answer.

"Well, even with my absence, we were still seeing each other right? You two have been visiting me afterall."

At that, both girls' faces went a tinge of red. The reason? Embarrassment probably. Although I don't really get what it is that they should be embarrassed about. It's not like going to someone's house, someone who you probably like, is something to be embarrassed… about…

Well, when you put it that way.

…

I faked a cough hoping that it would clear the awkwardness, and continued on with my point.

"I mean, isn't that just how it is? If you're constantly spending time with another, chances are, you probably wouldn't notice the changes that the other would go through. Take oneself for example. It is an undeniable fact that oneself would be spending 100% of oneself's time with oneself. Now tell me, how often does oneself notice oneself's changes? Not that often I tell you. Oftentimes, another would notice oneself's changes before oneself himself/herself. That is unless if they're really big noticeable changes."

I could have ended it at that. "Like Yukinoshita having development on a certain part of her body." But I just couldn't resist the chance of taking a jab on Yukinoshita's ego. "Or should I say parts?" Such chances don't come along that often afterall.

It took a moment for the jab to sink in. But when it did, oh boy was it satisfying.

Yukinoshita's face became redder, as so did she cover her chest with her hands while giving me, what I think of, the sharpest glare that she could give me. But to me, she appeared like a tiny cat trying its best to scare off its predators. What I meant to say was, instead of looking terrifying, she looked strangely cute. But I won't say that to her. That would just hurt her ego more.

"H-hey Hikki! That's mean!" came Yuigahama to Yukinoshita's defences.

Hey, it's not like what I said was wrong!

But I guess I may have gone too far? Nah. A win is a win, no matter how underhanded the methods one did in order to get it. Hikigaya Hachiman 2 – Yukinoshita Yukino 999,999… Let's not keep track of that shall we?

Yukinoshita cleared her throat loud enough for the rest of the club to hear. That meant that she had something to say.

"Even if I find it unnecessary for you to mention that thing about my body, I kind of see your point."

"Well yeah, I kinda get what you mean Hikki."

Welp, as long as my thoughts get across then.

With that, I deemed the conversation concluded. And so I went back to my usual club activity which was reading a light novel while sipping tea from time to time.

…

Hmm.

"Hey Yukinoshita, did you do something new with the tea?"

Things in the clubroom have become relatively uneventful after that particular exchange between us. We all went back to our usual activities, me doing you know what, Yukinoshita doing you know what, and Yuigahama doing you know what. Basically just another day at the service club. It's not like something else would happen just because it's my first day here after being gone for an amount of time right?

As if on cue, the clubroom's door suddenly opened without prelude so much so a knock. Now based on those facts, we can narrow down the culprit to two people. Culprit one would be Hiratsuka-sensei. It is a known fact that Hiratsuka-sensei never knocks whenever she enters the clubroom.

However, it is also a known fact that whenever Hiratsuka-sensei enters the room, Yukinoshita would say 'Hiratsuka-sensei, please knock'.

"Yahallo!" Another known fact is that Hiratsuka-sensei never greets anyone with that god-awful excuse of a greeting. Can you just imagine what would happen if she does? Utter chaos I would say!

And so, we can finally trim it down to one culprit which is none other than…

"Yahallo Iroha-chan! It's been a while."

"It's been a while indeed. Good afternoon Ishikki-san. Come, please take a seat."

…my one and only foxy kouhai, Isshiki Iroha.

After the greetings though, something I could classify as strange happened. Even after Yukinoshita offered Isshiki a seat, she didn't budge from where she's standing, which is at the clubroom's entrance, wearing a cheerful smile on her face. I'd say strange because she'd always take such offer wholeheartedly.

That made us stare confusingly at the fox, which seemingly had no effect on her. Said fox just stood there seemingly unfazed. If I were her, I would get antsy because of the attention. A moment after, the stare of the two girls were transferred as if I would have the one answer to the theoretical question. I'm sorry girls but as much I want shed light to you, I cannot for I have no explanation for the fox's current action.

"Iroha-chan?" voiced out Yuigahama. I presume that she did so to question the fox about her behaviour. Such brave soul!

But then it hit me.

I may actually know the reason for the fox's action.

It's simple actually.

…

With a sheepish smile on my face, I looked at the fox and voiced out "Y-yo."

See, that is what was missing. I haven't actually greeted her yet.

"Finally. I was starting to think that I'd be standing here forever you know?" said the fox, ending it with a pout. H-hey. At least I actually greeted you. And it's not like you'd actually stand there forever should I haven't right?

…

Yeah, she might really do that.

"But anyway, Yahallo once again Yuigahama-senpai, Yukinoshita-senpai. It really has been a while hasn't it?" said Isshiki as she finally entered the clubroom.

And thus, club activities have resumed once again, albeit with the addition of the sly fox.

…

Ha.

As if!

Note to self: whenever the fox's involved, you can bet your ass that it won't be like usual.

"Uhm, Isshiki?" I whispered to her.

"Yes Hachiman?" she replied in a sweet voice.

"Hachiman? Did Iroha-chan call Hikki Hachiman?"

"…"

…

"Why are you sitting there?" I whispered to her once again.

"Hm? Isn't it expected for the girlfriend to seat besides her boyfriend whenever they can?" Oi! Shhh shhh! Girlfriend?! What bullshit are you spouting?! Who knows what ideas you can plant into the minds of these girls right here!?

…

I know. I know. It's not exactly bullshit. But if I remember correctly, I really haven't agreed on becoming her boyfriend. What I agreed upon though is that we could be considered exclusively dating.

…

Hey, it's an entirely different relationship from that of a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship! Like, for one, the former is kinda like just testing the waters, pretty much entering a relationship without commitment. The latter is pretty much like a done deal, it requires commitment.

….

Yeah, I don't believe myself either.

…

"So they're like that now huh? I guess that we should have seen it coming ne Yukinon?"

"…yeah."

…

Sigh. I was hoping that I won't have to do this anytime soon. But, well, that's just wishful thinking. Ever since that time, I have known that this moment would come. I've been putting it on hold for quite a while now even. I know that it was pretty bratty of Isshiki to do this here and now, but I can somehow understand the reasoning for her actions. I'm pretty sure she's aware of the girls' affection for me. She's getting pretty impatient. Maybe insecure. She just wants me to clear things up already.

While it is true that I am not obligated to explain anything to them, I personally feel that they should know. They're one of the few people that I've open my heart to, even if just slightly. And needless to say, they have done the same to me too.

I am not their property yes. I am allowed to date anyone who I want to. Heck, I am allowed to not date at all. I am not in anyway obligated to these two girls.

…

But, and I know Isshiki knows this too…

I cannot just let these girls be out of the loop.

It 's the reason why Isshiki is here.

"Let me-."

"Uh-uhm. Hachiman?"

…

"Right. Let us explain."

"Isshiki, I-"

"SENPAI YOU JERK!"

Have you ever been put in a situation where you have no idea how to act? I've been. Countless times by now when I think about it. Surely by having such experience I would know how to act in accordance to the situation that has been to me right now, right? Well, that's beautiful irony of it. No matter how many times you've put into such situations, no amount of experience will teach you what to do, how to act, how to react.

Just like now. I'm not certain as to how to react to the actions that a certain kouhai of mine have committed. I mean, am I supposed to apologize to her since she's pretty mad at me? She did slap me just now, which is pretty much an indication that she's mad at me. Or am I supposed to comfort her because she's crying? While she may not shedding actual tears (probably she already cried them all), that sobbing of hers tells it all. I mean, whenever Komachi is crying, as the aspiring perfect Onii-chan that I am, I do what I can to be able to comfort her. Or am I supposed to hug her back? Because, as of now, Issshiki is tightly hugging my frame, seemingly afraid of letting me go.

They often say that having more is better. Having more is merrier. And while what they say isn't wrong, it's not like it is always right either. Having more certainly isn't always better. Take multiple choices exams for example. Wouldn't it be better if there were lesser choices? The chance of getting (hint: guessing) the correct answer is higher the fewer choices there are. Now, what does that say about having more?

Being presented with multiple choices of actions is a grey area. It's great when all of the choices are correct. It's less when only a few of the choices are correct. It's worst when only one of them is the right one (there has to be alteast one correct choice; what's the point in giving choices if none of them were correct right?).

And it's not like going with all choices is the correct way to respond either. Aside from investing more of your time and putting more of your effort, should there be only one correct choice, the end result will never be positive. At best, it would be neutral.

But unless 'not doing anything' is one of the choices, inaction isn't exactly better than possibly making the wrong choice. And that's why I have to take action now. Even if I don't know exactly what I should do.

Maybe I should just let my instincts take in?

…

"Isshiki, I'm back."

…

"…Welcome back Senpai."

"Isshiki, I'm sorry." I said to the one still hugging my frame.

Such statement made the girl look up to me.

"Hm? What for?" she asked with curious eyes. Even with the disheveled look she had, I cannot deny that she looked cute.

…

She was spot on with her question though. I mean, what am I exactly sorry for though? Am I sorry because I practically 'broke' up with her? Or something?

…

I really don't know exactly.

"Well, I don't know. It just felt like I had to say it."

I decided that I should just come clean with it, consequences be damned. It's not like I'll be losing anything anymore right?

…

At that, Isshiki finally let go of me. She then relocated herself, seated on the edge of the hospital bed that I was laid on.

While looking towards the room's window, she said "I don't think there's anything that you should be sorry for Senpai."

…

I… I don't know what to say to that.

"Well, except for almost dying in front of me." She added, giving me a brief smile "But you already said you're sorry for that." And she once again directed towards the window.

…

"Isshiki-" I tried reaching out to her.

"Hold it Senpai. I really mean it. There's nothing for you to be sorry for."

Do I really have nothing to be sorry for? Or was she just saying that because she thinks that she's the one who should be sorry? Just because one party is guilty doesn't make other the guiltless right?

…

But as of earlier, when I apologized, I really didn't what I was sorry for. Does that mean that I'm guiltless afterall?

"Ever since that day, I've been thinking about things. Things like, if I have been more honest with you, would things have gone differently?"

Not really.I am as guilty as Isshiki is.

"I have been unfair to you. Maybe even to the both of us."

I really haven't been honest either. To myself. To her. To everyone.

"You were right about the 'dates' not being about Hayama-senpai. They never were. They were an excuse for me to be able to spend more time with you… with just you."

Well, it's true that I honestly think that I don't deserve. In fact, I think that I don't deserve anybody.

"And the sad thing was, even though I've been straightforward with other things that involved you, I never had the courage to just straighten it up you know? Was it because of my pride? Was it something else?"

But even so, I wanted to give myself a try. What I think and what I feel won't always be the same. There will be times when what I say, what I think, what I do won't agree with each other.

"So I kept on wearing that façade hoping that one day, you'd catch wind of what I'm actually doing. And as expected, you did. Although I'm not really sure exactly when you did."

Maybe it's time for me to open my doors again?

"After that, I had hoped that you'd take advantage of the circumstance. But that was only wishful thinking on my part. We're talking about you afterall."

…

"I want something genuine. That's what you said right? What you desire? And what I gave you wasn't anywhere close to it."

I want something genuine. It's a phrase that has haunted me, maybe for years now. I've had enough of lies, deceit, pretending. I just wanted to things to be real. I just wanted to truly understand. I just wanted to truly know what it is that I am. What it is I am to this world. What it is that I am to them.

"But know this Hikigaya Hachiman, my feelings for you. They're real. I don't care how you interpret them. I don't care how you would handle them. It's only fair after what I've done to you."

…

"I know that I can't take back what I did. I can only hope that you'd completely forgive. Meeting you was one thing. Spending time with you was another. Losing you forever is something I don' want to go through.

Senpai… is it too much of me to ask that we start over again?"

But can we, Isshiki and I just start over again?

"I… I don't think we can just start over again Isshiki."

No. I don't think so.

But that doesn't mean that we can't start something new right?

"But I'm willing to give us a try... to try something new."

"Aren't you happy that they took it better that we thought they would?"

…well, they did take it better than I expected. I was expecting a little more drama, that they would question the 'genuineness' of our relationship. And while they did, I was expecting even more. That might just be my pessimism though.

"Oh come on Senpai. You can't seriously still be mad at me."

But just because things went smoother than I thought they would be doesn't mean that the fox automatically a get-out-of-jail card for the fiasco that she caused. I mean, ok. It's great that we were able to handle that situation. But what if things didn't go the way they were? I'd possibly break two bonds, or even three!

We could have absolutely avoided all that risk if she just told me that she was planning to do this today.

"Y-You could have told me beforehand!" I blurted at her "And what, you're calling me Senpai again now? You were so steadfast in calling me Hachiman earlier you know?" and some more. If you'd ask me where that came from, I'd answer you with 'I don't know. Ask the author'.

…

"But I've waited long enough! You can't just make me wait forever you knoowww?"

A-aahh, well… she's not wrong. I may have hoped that I could put this on hold for like, and indefinite amount of time. Ehe.

"And I thought that maybe you don't want me calling you that... so…" she meekly added. H-hey! You were so brave and stubborn earlier though! Don't go tsundere on me now!

…

But I suppose I understand her. I didn't exactly give her my approval of her calling me that. But it's not like I don't approve of it either. Rather,

"It's fine. You can call me whatever you want."

And it's true. In fact, I don't care what she calls me. She's been calling me Senpai for who knows how long. Did I bat an eye? No. So why should I start now?

Annndddd before you accuse me of being apathetic and non-romantic, lets me stop you there. The point of letting her call me whatever she wants isn't solely because I don't care. It has also to do with giving to what she wants.

"Is that so? Can I call you Darling?"

…uhmm.

Okay, maybe I do care a little about what she calls me. I just cannot, for the life of me, let her call me that. It's just to… ughhhhhh.

"Please, not anything cheesy." I pleaded to her.

Isshiki pouted at that. Oh come on, please?

"Fiiiiinnee… I guess Hachiman will do then." Thank you!

…

"So, will you be calling me by my name too?"

"Hmm? Don't I call you by your name already?"

Isshiki gave me a disappointed look at that. What? It's not like what I said was wrong though. What did I do to be given such look?

"Silly. I mean my given name. Since, you know. We're already dating now. Truly dating."

O-oh. So that's what she meant. Ahah.

…

Well, it's a pretty common phenomenon for couples to call each other by their given names. But is that enough of a reason for me to call her by her name? From what I gather, we two aren't exactly normal people. And by that logic, I am not expected to follow the norm right?

"Hmm… nah, I think My Sly Fox fits you better."

"Hh-hey! Senpai you jerk!"

How to (Be) Tame(d) (by) A Fox – End.

[1] Reference to X-men's Wolverine.

And that's a wrap. I can't believe writing this piece took me months. In all honesty, I thought of just about ending this at chapter 3 (A Tale of Three Phases). It seemed like a good ending then and there. But it also presented opportunities for me to write more. And so, here we are ending at chapter 6.

To be honest, I wasn't really that enthusiastic about writing this chapter. I mean, pretty much everything's been revealed in the past chapter and all we needed was a wrap-up chapter. There's practically nothing for me to write about. And I'm not one to just write a chapter just for wrap-up purposes. That would take like what, 2k words or less? I just can't find it in me to write just 2k or less words for a chapter.

And so, that explains the somewhat fluff intros. But it's not like it's entirely fluff right? They're still kind relevant to the story overall. And I know, I know. They're pretty OOC here. Especially Isshiki. But if there's one thing I've learned reading lots of fanfics, it is that story characters can be people too. They are not just one-dimensional characters. They can have development too.

…

Welp, that's it. Hope you enjoyed the conclusion although I bet that you already saw it coming and were just waiting for the execution. Until next time!