Title: Maura's Farewell Party

Rating: T

Author: tika12001 (aka Katie)

Summary: Well, I don't know about everyone else but my theory is that Jan is going to leave the show with Maura going away somewhere and the final episode being her goodbye party. So this is my answer to my theory... even though my theory could be way wrong. Just read it. Rizzles of course. :-)

Author's notes: Does anyone else have this theory that Jan will brilliantly (please note severe sarcasm) have Maura leaving to go do something else? Because I think she will and it makes me angry. But... yay for fic idea? Anyway, I have a cold and my writing muscles have not been used in a while so this could be very very bad but hopefully you guys like it anyway.

Disclaimer: the characters belong to Tess Gerritsen and the tv show creation to Janet Tamaro. They are the owners, I own nothing but my imagination and a computer. I make no money off this so please don't sue :-)

You know, Jane wasn't entirely sure, but she was pretty certain that she was not supposed to be this miserable over her best friend leaving when said best friend didn't appear to feel the same way.

Like, at all.

Jane glared moodily at her drink, running her finger around the lip of the beer bottle and watching as condensation built up on the side of it as she continued to... well, not drink it.

I will be happy for her, I will be happy for her, I will be... she repeated over and over to herself sternly, finally steeling herself for another glance up. She had to look around the Dirty Robber a bit before she spotted the familiar head of wavy, blonde hair, its owner standing at the bar. Maura's eyes were crinkled in that way they did when she was super happy, and Jane could see almost all of her teeth on display as she giggled and laughed with everyone, celebrating her achievements.

She was happy. And Jane was miserable.

Did that make her the worst friend ever or what?

"You know," a voice spoke without warning besides Jane's ear, making her jump and her hand immediately head for her hip, for the gun that was normally holstered there. She turned to see who was speaking and found herself glaring at Kent. Of course. "...you could be up there with her, celebrating," he continued, seemingly unaware of the eye daggers being shot his way.

Jane's eyes narrowed. Here was the reason for all her misery. Wasn't he the one who told Maura about her brain condition, that... what was it called again? Anyway. Here was the one who catalogued all her symptoms, convinced her to go for the surgery, made her doubt herself so much, made her start thinking of alternate fields of work... Jane conveniently didn't think about the fact that Maura only got injured because of Jane herself, and that the surgery was actually necessary. No, it was much easier to just feel angry with Kent. "Go away, Kent," Jane gritted out unimaginatively.

"'Go away, Kent'? Come on, Jane... you're usually more creative in your insults than that." To her annoyance, Kent sat down next to her and seemed to be making himself comfortable. Her glare ratcheted up a few notches. He looked at her and snorted. "Jane, my dear," he said, and Jane realized for the first time how much she truly hated this man, "you really think that glare will work on me? My mother's is far worse."

Jane was now offended. "Excuse me?"

Kent paused with his drink halfway to his lips. "Your glare. Not scary." He looked at her briefly as her eyes narrowed once again. He half rolled his own eyes. "I mean, it's scary. Just not like... mother scary, you know?"

Jane floundered at that, her mouth open as she struggled to come up with a retort. Finally she crossed her arms over her chest and sat back huffily. "Great. Not only am I miserable, I have to hear you insult my badass-ish-ness."

"Yeah, speaking of you being miserable..." he sat forward and leaned into Jane's ear. She shooed him away like one would a pesky fly, but he leant right back in again. She sighed and went along with it. "Why aren't you up there with her?"

Finding her bottom lip starting to poke out slightly (without her permission too, thank you very much), Jane reached forward and began tracing the lip of the beer bottle once again. "Dunno," she muttered, even as her eyes sought out that familiar golden head again.

"You do know," Kent insisted, and Jane ignored him – Maura had just turned around, seemingly searching for something. Or someone, Jane was forced to amend that to when Maura's eyes landed on her and she immediately relaxed and smiled. Jane forced herself to look away, but not before seeing Maura lose her smile, a frown of confusion taking its place. "Jane..." Kent persisted, and Jane turned to him angrily.

"I'm gonna miss her, okay?"

Kent smiled gently at her. "We all knew that, Jane. The question is... why will you miss her?"

She rolled her eyes. "I'm assuming you're looking for an answer that comprises of more than 'she's my best friend'?"

"It'd be nice," he replied, taking a swig of his beer. Jane turned her head just enough to see Maura out of the corner of her eye. She was apparently deep in conversation with Jane's own mother – poor girl, won't get out of that for a while – but her worried gaze kept landing on Jane.

Jane sighed, turning back to Kent and finally picking up her beer. "I... it's just... we do everything together, you know? We have breakfast together most mornings. Lunch together when we can. Dinner if we get out of work at the same time. We go for runs, we talk about everything..." she sighed and lifted the beer to her mouth, taking a long swig before setting the bottle down again. Warm. Unsurprising, really. "I mean," she said, lifting her gaze and focusing it on Kent earnestly, "I'm happy for her. I truly am. I mean, this is what she wants... she wants to write. And God knows she has the talent. And the support... but I just... I don't know what I'll do without her." Jane was horrified to hear her voice break at the end of that sentence and immediately started picking the label off the bottle just for something to do with her hands.

When Kent's silence lasted for longer than seemed reasonable, Jane finally looked up curiously. He was staring at Maura with a faraway look in his eyes. "You know," he finally said quietly, "I've asked several people about your relationship with Maura. No one seems to know what to say."

Jane wonders if she should be more upset about the fact that Kent has apparently been discussing her and Maura with every tom, dick and harry, but can't seem to summon up the energy. "I know," she agrees numbly.

"How would you categorize it?" he asked softly. Jane bit her lip.

"We're not gay."

"I never said that," Kent agrees carefully, and Jane looks at him, sagging slightly.

"No, you didn't," Jane agreed with a sigh. "I did." She looks at Maura again, who was still caught up in a conversation with Angela. Maura was looking slightly frantic now and Jane deliberately turned away before Maura could catch her eye. She needed to finish this conversation first. "Maura is..." Jane trailed off, seemingly unable to finish what seemed to be, on the surface, a simple question. Maura is... a doctor, a genius, a blonde, a hazel eyed person, a yoga doer, a runner, a seemingly never-ending spout of knowledge, a giver, a donator, a hugger, a kisser, a snuggler... Jane shook her head. That train of thought went places that Jane wasn't entirely sure she could handle yet.

You better learn to handle it soon, a little voice in her head (that sounded depressingly like her mother) berated her. Because otherwise it will be too late.

"I can still visit her. All the time," Jane said, and Kent raised an eyebrow at her.

"That doesn't answer my question."

Jane blinked and decided to try her innocent expression. "What question?"

Kent shook his head. "Nope."

Jane sighed. Should have known that wouldn't work. "Our relationship... Maura is my best friend."

Kent took a sip of beer. "And?"

"And... an amazing person."

"And?"

"And... a doctor."

Kent raised an eyebrow but didn't rise to the bait. "And?"

"She's a medical examiner," Jane answered, sarcasm dripping heavily from every syllable. Kent simply smiled.

"And?"

"And..." Jane started, but deflated abruptly. "And she's my whole world." This time, the tears could not be held back. Jane sniffled and wiped her nose with the back of her hand. Kent handed her a tissue and she gratefully took it, handing it back when finished without thinking. To his credit, Kent took it with barely a grimace, though he did sanitise his hands with a pocket container of hand sanitiser when the tissue had been disposed of in the bin next to the table. Within ten seconds though, he sighed and handed her the whole box of tissues. Jane accepted with a watery smile of thanks.

"Have you told her this?" Kent finally asked after a couple of minutes of the tears showing no signs of abating.

"No," Jane sniffled, blowing her nose again. "I can't. I need her to know I support her."

"So... you're doing that by sitting here and looking like your dog just died?"

"Shut up," Jane groused, then conceded, "but duly noted." She glanced over at Maura once more, who seemed to have accepted her fate. Her face bore a look of dismal despondency as she nodded along to Angela's emotional outpouring. Jane couldn't help but smile slightly.

"You know," Kent said softly, "I'm pretty sure there are police stations in Maine."

Jane turned to him so fast her neck cricked. She rubbed it while she stared at him. "I'm not going to just follow my friend blindly! We're not... we're not dating, for fuck's sake!"

Kent nodded, and rose to his feet. Jane felt bereft at the apparent sudden ending of the conversation... until he leant down and whispered in her ear.

"Yet."

R&IR&IR&I

"So, Kent is really annoying," Jane said abruptly, breaking the silence that had descended over the two of them since they had made their quiet escape from the bar several long minutes ago. "How do you put up with him?"

"The same way I imagine that you put up with your mother," Maura answered drily, cradling her drink in her hand. Jane winced.

"Yeah, I, uh... I saw you talking to her."

"You must have witnessed a different conversation than the one I was involved in. The one I was involved in contained very little talking on my part. Your mother, however..."

"Well, you let her build up a head of steam," Jane said defensively. "You should know by now that when she gets emotional like that, you need to cut her off at the pass. Otherwise she won't ever shut up."

"Yes, but you see normally my best friend is there to help me... how did you put it? Slice her off?"

Jane couldn't help but smile. Maura had improved so much over the past seven years of their friendship – Jane liked to think that was largely due to her own influence – but she still made adorable little faux pas like that occasionally. "It's cut her off, Maura."

"Oh."

"Yeah," Jane rolled her beer in between her hands and vaguely considered just getting a new one... this one had been held for long past its life span. In essence, she was cradling a corpse in her hands. The thought made her snort with laughter, then blink rapidly as more tears threatened beneath her eyelids. Damn, how many tears can one person have inside them?

Maura either didn't hear the snort or chose to ignore it, instead asking, "So why didn't you come over to me?"

Jane winced. "I... didn't notice you?"

"I saw you looking."

Of course you did. "I was talking to Kent."

"Ah, yes, the annoying one."

Jane let out a soft laugh, lifting her beer to her mouth. Blech. Yep, definitely a beer corpse now. "Yeah," she said softly, finally. "Him."

"What were you talking about?"

Jane went for the sarcastic method. "Well, gee, Maura, here we were, sitting at the Dirty Robber for you, attending your goodbye party. I'm best friends with you, he works with you, and we were talking about Korsak of course! Doesn't that make perfect sense?"

"Jane," the voice was soft, and Jane felt herself deflate as rapidly as a popped balloon.

"We were talking about you, Maura. We were always talking about you."

She felt Maura press herself up a little bit tighter to her side, but still she refused to look at her. The truth was, Jane was scared. Scared that, if she turned to look at Maura, she'd never want to stop looking. "What about me?" Maura asked quietly, and Jane sighed.

"He wanted to know why I was sitting alone."

"Oh," Maura said softly. Jane waited for her to say more, but nothing more seemed to be forthcoming, so she forged on ahead.

"And why I was miserable."

"I see."

"And why I wasn't up with you, celebrating this big change in your life."

The only noise for several long moments were the muted sounds from inside, the sounds of the trees moving in the wind, and a car alarm a few blocks away. "Why weren't you?" Maura finally asked, and when Jane heard the tears clogging her voice, she immediately wrapped her arm around Maura's shoulders.

"Because," she said quietly, "I... I couldn't... let you know." She felt Maura shift slightly, her head turning so she could look at Jane unimpeded. Stubbornly, though, Jane continued to refuse to look back at her.

"Let me know what?"

"How..." Now Jane could hear the tears clogging her own voice and she cleared her throat a couple of times before speaking again. The ball that had lodged in her throat several hours ago was stubborn though... it wasn't going away any time soon. "How miserable I am that you decided to leave me."

"I'm not..." Maura started but Jane cut her off.

"I know you're not leaving me, Maura. I'm an adult... I know this. I know it's because you're following your dreams and your passions, and your career opportunities for writing are greatly increased if you go there, I just... I can't help but feel..." The ball was bigger than ever, and no amount of swallowing or clearing of her throat seemed to be able to dislodge it. Jane shook her head, hoping that would be enough.

"Feel...?"

Damn it... "Like you're... like you're leaving me. Like... I'm not important enough to make you stay."

"Oh Jane," Maura whispered. Jane covered her face with her spare hand and they sat in silence for several long moments as she collected herself.

Finally... "You never asked me to stay," Maura murmured, her cheek resting on Jane's shoulder. Jane jerked in surprise and anger.

"You think I would be so selfish?"

"No, Jane, I..."

"No," Jane interrupted, pulling her arm back and standing up. Going down the last couple of stairs, she started pacing down the bottom, leaving Maura to watch her movements back and forth like she was watching a tennis match. "No, Maura, I would never do that. I want you to be happy. I want whatever it will take to make you happy. And if moving to Maine will do that... that's fine. In fact, that's great! Let's grab your stuff now and start moving it! We can hire a moving van and a couple of guys... or hell, Frankie and I can do it. Even Tommy will help I'm sure, if I promise him I'll get him a video game or something. I. Want. You. To be. Happy. That is all that matters to me. Understand?" She found herself stopped, her finger poked aggressively into Maura's chest, Maura's glittery multicoloured eyes staring up at her trustingly.

"What about you though?"

Jane blinked. "What?"

"What... about... you?" Maura reiterated slowly. "How can I possibly be happy if you're miserable?"

"I..." Jane stared. "I don't know."

"What would make you happy?"

Jane blinked again, rapidly. "This isn't about me."

Maura sighed, standing up and carefully smoothing down her skirt before heading down to join Jane. "I think it is. I think," she added carefully, "that to talk about one is to talk about us both. I don't think we can be as easily separated as all that."

Jane stared for a long time, before finally her face crumpled. "You never asked me to come with you."

"And you never asked me to stay," Maura repeated herself softly, a small smile on her face. "We are both entirely too selfless."

Jane sniffled. "Definitely."

Maura sighed. "I'm sick of being selfless."

Jane looked up. "You are?"

Maura nodded. "It's a long drive to Maine."

"4 hours," Jane agreed.

"It would be nice to have someone to chat to."

"Sing along to music with."

"Badly," Maura added.

"Hey, I'm not too bad!"

"Be good to have someone there to help me unpack too."

"Of course. Unpacking sucks."

"Maybe cuddle at night."

Jane swallowed. "Cuddles are good. Don't tell anyone I said that though."

"Your secret is safe with me." Maura took a step closer.

"Good."

"The police station at Maine would be happy to have you."

"They would?"

"Yes. And... it's quieter there. You could teach part time. Tell the rookies all your secrets."

"Not all of them."

"Most of them, then." Maura stepped even closer. They were now toe to toe.

"How do you know I'd even want to do that?"

"Because you secretly love teaching."

"Do not."

"Do too."

Jane blinked. "You know me too well." Her gaze focused on Maura's lips, and she couldn't seem to tear it away.

"I do."

"What about my apartment?"

"Your mother has already decided how she wants to redecorate it."

"You told my mother?"

"Do you think I needed to?"

Jane put her head to the side in mock consideration, her eyes never leaving Maura's lips. "No, I suppose not."

"I think she knew before we did."

"I wouldn't be surprised."

"That's your mother for you."

"And we'll be four hours drive away from her."

"Don't celebrate too soon," Maura smiled. "Phones still exist."

"Don't remind me." There was a brief pause. "You know this means we have two households worth of shit to pack up now."

"That's okay, I'll go through it all for you."

"You just want to throw out stuff don't you?"

"No."

"Maura."

"I'll donate it, not throw it out."

Jane laughed. "Of course."

"Can't waste it."

"Never," Jane murmured. She leant forward, her lips mere inches away from Maura's when...

"It's cake time!" Kent opened the door, cheering loudly. "Oh. Shit... uh... I'll just..." he hooked a thumb over his shoulder and disappeared inside rapidly. Jane moaned, letting her head drop onto Maura's shoulder.

"I really can't stand that man."

Maura laughed brightly. "Oh, he's not too bad. Shall we?" She held out her arm, and Jane grudgingly thread her arm through it, her lips still tingling from the promise of a kiss that was never delivered.

"I guess so." Stomping up the stairs, Maura giggling beside her, Jane threw open the door melodramatically, bowing before Maura and gesturing she go inside first. "You do realize," Jane hissed as Maura walked past, "that now we'll have to tell everyone I'm leaving now too."

"Oh," said Maura, as they walked into the room where the cake was sitting on the bench. Jane walked over to it curiously, dying to have a look since she hadn't been allowed to earlier. It was huge, and the writing on it was beautifully done in cursive. Jane admired it for a second before actually reading the writing:

Goodbye and good luck, Jane and Maura!

"... I don't think anyone will be surprised," Maura finished softly as Jane whirled around to look at her, the crowd clapping around them.

"How did...?"

"We had a backup cake, just in case," Kent exclaimed eagerly, approaching with a big smile but backing off when Jane glared.

"Admit it," Maura whispered. "Kent's not so bad."

"I admit nothing," Jane murmured back, and finally, finally threaded her fingers through silky hair, bringing Maura's lips to her own.

Yeah... I guess he's not too bad at all.

END.