What Is Real and What Isn't?

Chapter 6: The Confrontation

He looked… he looked just like she remembered. His hair was longer, more Dreamy than the last time she saw him, but he looked just like she remembered. He had less gray hairs, that was for sure, but his blue eyes looked more… welcoming, more loving. Meredith stared blankly at her husband for a long moment before she smiled at him. "Derek…"

The sound of his name on her lips sounded almost alien to her; saying his name and actually addressing him were two very different things and it made her heart race. Derek looked almost like a statue, watching her like a deer caught in the headlights; she just wanted to forget everything that had happened between him dying and this moment.

"Shouldn't you be in bed?" Derek asked, finally addressing why she was in a wheelchair and not in bed. Meredith didn't make a move and he began to make his way out from behind the nurses' station. "Meredith, is everything alright?"

She nodded. "Mhm hmm. I just, I wanted to see you." She tried to explain, staring at him unblinkingly. "Can we talk? I know Alex said he was bringing Zola to you…where is Zola?"

"She wanted something to eat and I was finishing up paperwork. Alex took her to the cafeteria." Derek was now standing just a few feet away from her. "We can talk. Meredith, I…"

Meredith smiled slightly at her husband, figuring that Derek had had a really tough time lately; she had been in a coma! Of course, Derek would be destressed. "Why don't we talk in a conference room or something? I… I just want to talk, Derek."

He nodded. He pushed Meredith's wheelchair into a nearby, empty conference room. Meredith felt uncomfortable under Derek's watchful eye; she kept thinking about what her doctor would say if she found out Meredith and Derek were together. Doctor Coven had her reasons for keeping them apart - Meredith had fainted last time she set eyes on Derek – but she missed her husband. She hadn't set eyes on him for so long, it seemed.

"What do you want to talk about?" Derek asked.

Derek pushed her wheelchair to the edge of the table after pulling away from the chairs, giving her room at it; he took a seat beside her and gave her his undivided attention. Meredith in turn looked stony, staring at her husband as she tried to pinpoint where everything had gone wrong between them before. She supposed him choosing Washington over her hadn't been a good place, but if she remembered correctly, she had been mad at him before all of that. She resented him…just like she had resented Cristina.

"How much did Doctor Coven tell you about… my issues?" Meredith begun, wishing to know how much Derek knew.

"Not much," Derek answered. "She avoids me as much as she can. She says she's busy, but whenever I corner her, somehow Mark pages her and needs her."

Okay, great. Now, where to start? Meredith wondered. She swallowed back her emotions, her fears, and focused on the possibility that this could be her happily ever after. Cristina would surely cackle at her for thinking such a thing if she knew. "In my coma, I… lived on. Things were different in my head. For one, Mark died after we were recused and Arizona lost her leg." Meredith began. "We sued the hospital, won, and then decided to buy the hospital. We decided to rename it Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital."

Meredith could see the way Derek's hands twitched and she knew he wanted to hold her, but they were two very different people in this moment. Meredith felt so old and worn by this point, and Derek… he wasn't tainted like she was.

She continued. "I got pregnant shortly after, I uh… almost died. But, thanks to Bailey, I survived and we decided to name our son Bailey." She smiled at the memory, but the ache inside of her chest reminded her how much she missed her three children. "After we had Bailey, things…went downhill. For one, you were called by the President to help him with something and we always were fighting. I… I didn't think we were going to survive it and then…you died."

"How?" Derek found himself asked quietly.

"You saved a couple of people in a car crash on your way to Washington. You apparently parked in the middle of the street to text me or something, and a transfer truck hit you." Meredith could feel tears fill her eyes and she felt her nails digging into her skin, but she continued. "I pulled the plug because the people at the Medical Center you were sent to weren't trained for any sort of trauma, and you were brain dead. Amelia - who lived with us by the way – was so angry with me. But, I couldn't handle the thought of keeping you on the machines so I told them to unplug you. You passed away quietly."

Derek was silent and staring at Meredith, and she could see the confusion in his blue eyes. But, she continued anyway.

"I later found out I was pregnant again and took the kids and left. I didn't take to anyone for months, and when I came back, I had had Ellis. People were ticked off sure, but it was worse when Callie fell in love with her Pretty Penny. Penny was one of the doctors who treated you and killed you." Meredith was still bitter about Callie leaving Seattle and taking Penny's side. She would never understand why Callie decided to love someone like Penny; Penny had killed Derek. She had stolen him from Meredith and her children. "Can you guess who was then hired at the hospital?"

"Callie's Pretty Penny?" Derek asked, raising an eyebrow.

Meredith nodded. "Bailey offered to fire her for me – she's the new Chief of Surgery – but I knew it wasn't fair to judge someone who wasn't trained correctly. So, I had Penny on my service and I made her life hell for you."

"It sounds like a lot happened." Derek commented, surprised.

"There's more," Meredith replied, shaking her head at the memories. It was nice to share them with someone. It was nice to talk to Derek. "Within a year, Penny was offered another job and she took it. Callie and Arizona had a custody battle over Sofia. Arizona won, and ended up giving Callie Sofia anyway. They left to New York and we haven't heard from them since. And then, Amelia got married."

Derek looked stunned by this news. "To who?"

"Owen. Cristina had left a year before you died and Owen had been alone ever since." Meredith said gently. "I passed out and hit my head at their wedding." She knew she was leaving out her relationship with Riggs, but could she honestly tell Derek about her feelings for another a man? A man who wasn't her husband? "Derek, there's more."

"How could there be more?" Derek was stunned by all of this.

Meredith took in a deep breath. "I met someone. I… I could see my chance to be happy again, after your… death."

He didn't say a word, stunned by all of this, and he got to his feet and left Meredith alone in the conference room. She bowed her head and let out a deep breath.

She had faced her fears by laying everything out to him, and Derek had walked away. Hell, she didn't even cover Maggie or what exactly Riggs was to her. Meredith sighed, feeling a headache coming on, and she covered her face with a grumble.

Up Next: The Decision: Does Derek decide to forgive Meredith for her coma-self deciding to try love again or not? And does Meredith even truly want him back?

REVIEWS

BrandiIndigo: I'm glad. I hope I continue to keep your attention.

Patsy: They still have a long ways before they can truly be together and happy again. ;) And, if I decide to write a MerMar story, it's my choice. I think they're cute together and I think Mark would make Meredith happy. Much more than Derek, to be honest. Derek was an arse near the end.

Sakural23: I'm glad to hear it!

Guest: Me and you both, buddy. You and me both… xD

Guest: 'Cause I dislike Izzie. *shrugs*

Thank you for the reviews and I hope to hear more from everyone! :D