Disclaimer: Don't own and never will.

AN: Written for The Outstanding OCs Contest by Hillstar and the Pick Up Lines by Screaming Faeries

"Are you a Boggart? Because I have a fear of hot girls."

Matthew Hall gave his friend James an amused look and smirked.

"I think you need your eyes testing mate. I'm pretty sure I don't look like a girl," he replied and James rolled his eyes. Matthew simply grinned.

"So who's this girl you're thinking of using it on?" Matthew asked as he looked around the Gryffindor Common room. "Pretty sure you've managed to break the heart of every witch at Hogwarts who isn't family."

"That's not fair!" James protested. "I've only dated-"

"Rebecca Smith, Hannah Day, Alice Bagshaw, Katherine Nott, Shreena Gohil, Laura Greengrass and Susan Adelson. That's pretty much all the good looking ones taken in our year," Matthew said, cutting James off before he could get any further. "Who else is left?"

James just glared at his friend.

"There are times I wonder why I'm friends with you Mattie boy."

"Mainly because I'm the only one to keep up with your awesomeness?" Matthew replied and James grinned.

"I knew there was something I liked about you," James paused for a moment and drew himself up to his full height with an air of pseudo pompousness that made Matthew grin. "I have some very important news indeed. The lucky girl I have decided to bestow my attentions on is none other than," he paused yet again for dramatic effect, an effect ruined slightly by Matthew's chuckling.

"You do know you look ridiculous like that?" he asked and James glared at him once more.

"Matt, you put me off!" he complained and Matthew shrugged. James gave his friend one last glare before continuing. "As I was saying before you so rudely interrupted me, the girl I'm looking at is none other than Anita Vane."

"Hufflepuff girl, our year with long dark hair, big brown eyes and dark skin?" he asked and James nodded with a snort.

"How many Anita Vane's do YOU know in this school?" he asked and Matthew shrugged. "Yes, that Anita Vane."

"I thought she was dating Lawrence Randall?"

"She dumped him an hour ago. Bet your little gossip train isn't that fast," James replied with a smirk and Matthew sighed.

"Not this time. So how do you know this? Like, know for sure?" he asked and James grinned.

"Walked in on them breaking up. It was pretty heated," James paused and whistled. "Some of the language coming out of Anita's mouth…ouch."

"Language you'll hear when you break up with her. You sure you want to do this?"

"Hey, it's me. I'm sure she can't be worse than listening to Victoire cursing away anyway," James said with a smile. "Besides, I know for a fact that she won't hex me. I'm James Sirius Potter, the king of awesome!"

"And somewhat big headed as well," Matthew added with a grin. "Go for it!"

HPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHP

Matthew was sitting at the Gryffindor dining table eating breakfast when he was suddenly joined by a somewhat desolate and depressed looking James.

"James, you alright mate?" he asked and James just stared into space with a shocked expression. "James? James, what is it?"

"She said no…" James said in a somewhat disbelieving voice. "She actually said no."

"Sorry mate, didn't expect that. She say why?" Matthew asked and James nodded.

"She said…she said with pick up lines that bad, I must be desperate…"

"I thought it was a good line mate," Matthew said consolingly. He looked over to the Ravenclaw table where Rose and Scorpius were busy eating breakfast (and debating over some probably dull point about something or another) "Wanna go wind up your cousin Rose?"

"No!" James suddenly exclaimed with excitement, a sudden light in his eyes. "If she thinks THAT pick up line was bad, then I must try a new one, one that I am sure will win her heart!"

Matthew sighed and concentrated on eating his breakfast.