Sherlock,

I know you despise sentiment in all its forms, but right now I really don't care. This letter is full of sentiment. You can, of course, throw it away, unread, but then you will always wonder what it said.

I know you, you're still reading this. Anyway...

The last few days - no years - have been almost impossible. They would have been impossible were it not for you. I know, you'll say two of those horrendous years were your fault and you'd be right, but we've been through that. I understand why you felt you had to jump and I've forgiven you, so let's not rehash it here. There are things I've wanted to tell you for so long and that's what this letter is about.

Thank you. Thank you for giving me my life back that strange day when I walked into the lab at Barts with Mike. I didn't know it as we walked through those doors that I was getting my life back and I wouldn't have believed it if anyone had tried to tell me. I can still feel the thrill of the chase the next day and the laughter we shared standing in 221. Then there was the realisation that you had worked some sort of magic and cured my limp. You saved my life that day. You saved my life nearly every day for almost the next two years.

Then there was Mary and the baby. The less said about them, the better. The entire fiasco hurt more than when I was invalided home. Without you there, well, I might have done something foolish. So, you saved my life again.

When you ended up in hospital a few days ago, I panicked. The person on the phone told me what had happened, but all I heard was 'hit by car' and 'surgery'. I assumed the worst and, honestly, I thought my entire world had come to an end. It turned out you had to have a pin and plate placed in your arm. That's not great, I get that, but it meant you weren't going to die.

This is where things change in this letter, Sherlock, because this is where things changed for me. When I thought you might die, I realised I couldn't live through that again. There's a simple reason for that. I love you. Not as a friend or brother in arms, but with my whole self. There. I've said it. I don't expect things to change between us, but I feel you deserve to know. I won't bring it up again and I won't embarrass you with unseemly shows of affection. All I ask is this, know that your life is precious to someone.

John