Hey guys. So I've decided to take a break from LotR fanfiction (did I ever really even start?) And have some fun with HttyD. Its a series I'm very familiar with (my younger siblings watch it, like, almost every day) and its something that I can do in my hectic schedule with less stress and planning. I hope you guys enjoy it!

Side note; this is NOT a Hiccup/Merida romance. They'll be spending time together (duh) but it won't go beyond friendship. This isn't a crossover romance (not that I have anything against those if done properly). But I prefer to each Dreamworks character their own. Besides, I like Astrid. :)

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CHAPTER ONE

The Zippleback Experience

….

Let the wind carry us

To the clouds, hurry up, alright

We can travel so far

As our eyes can see

….

Hiccup had seen a lot of things in his eighteen years, but the last two days' fiasco absolutely and completely 100% took the cake to a whole new level.

When living in the same one thousand mile radius as the Thorston twins, one never knew what major catastrophe to expect next, except that it was best to be nowhere near anything that could explode, melt, fall on your head, or be lit on fire when it happened. They were wild and crazy, and only Thor knew how the Thorstons (or anyone within said thousand miles) had survived this long except through sheer willpower.

But for all their utter ridiculousness the twins loved their dragon. No, scratch that, they really loved their dragon. Hiccup had no problem with that. None whatsoever! He of all people understood what the prospect of losing a friend forever was like. They were Vikings! They didn't like to share their stuff.

But he wasn't okay with them trying to get him and/or Snotlout smited off the face of Midgard by an angry, overprotective, slightly crazy dragon. The twins clearly hadn't thought that one through at all. No, their 'risk assessments' didn't qualify as 'thinking it through'.

Hiccup paced back and forth across the room as he tried to formulate his words and sentences. From their perches on the stove, Tuffnut and Ruffnut watched him with mournful looks on their faces. Snotlout sat in a chair holding a cube of ice to his swelling jaw. Hiccup glanced at Toothless. The dragon watch everyone with his atypical serene green gaze. No backup there. Ugh, if only he could find a way to get through to the mule-headed Thorston twins.

At last he said, "Well, a little warning would have been nice!"

Snotlout pointed accusingly at the twins. He tried to speak, but the bruising of his jaw prohibited this and the only thing that came out of was a garbled, "Mmf. Mm!"

Tuffnut looked particularly droopy. He scratched his blond dreadlocks with a sigh. "Well, to be honest, Hiccup, we figured out what was ruining our plans."

Nodding at her brother's words, Ruffnut sniffed disdainfully. "It was you."

Hiccup stared at them, bewildered. "Me?!"

"Yeah," muttered Tuffnut. "You, my friend, are a terrible actor."

Hiccup made a strangled noise at the back of his throat. This was all his fault because he couldn't act scared enough to convince Barf and Belch that he was in need of life-saving? "So you made Snotlout attack me? Why?"

"Er, surprise is the word we prefer to use."

"We needed a real reaction from you," Tuffnut added

"And boy did we get one," Ruffnut snickered, nudging her brother and grinning. "Eh, Snotlout?"

Snotlout spluttered something unintelligible. Hiccup ignored him. The more he listened, the more he just wanted to hide in his hut with Toothless, plug his ears with wax, and sing la-la-la-la and let them all kill each other. Then he might at least get some peace and quiet. This was ridiculous.

"Unfortunately," Tuffnut went on. "We weren't expecting Thor's mighty hammer to meet Snotlout's paper jaw."

Okay, that one was on him. But Snotlout had asked for it. Even called Hiccup a coward and tried to hamstring him with an ax. But it wasn't like the twins were innocent! They'd been sitting up on the platform with a bowl of salted yakcorn (he was exaggerating, they hadn't actually had a bowl of yakcorn) watching the whole thing play out below without a single thought or regard for Snotlout's safety. Sure, the twins almost killed everyone on a daily basis but this was over the line.

He dropped his face into his hands and sighed. "Oh, this situation has gotten way out of hand."

"Please, Hiccup, you gotta help us." Tuffnut begged. "We're completely lost without our dragon! We have nothing to live for! Don't you understand?

Half of that very short speech was pure Thorston melodrama but the earnest fear in Tuffnut's voice momentarily surprised Hiccup. These two were really scared of losing Barf and Belch for good.

But by this point, he was far too exasperated to feel a lot of sympathy.

"We will get you your dragon back," he said, "But you two have to stop. Stop your plans, stop your schemes, okay? I'm going to figure this out."

And then he'd walked out to think. Toothless had tried to follow, but Hiccup had - rather sharply - told him that he wanted to be alone alone. The Night Fury hadn't like that one little bit and had even been a little hurt. It was obvious in the confusion in his green eyes. But Hiccup had gone anyway. He would apologize to Toothless later. Right now, he really needed some time alone to sort out his feelings and make a plan, a real plan, one that did not involve the dragon riders losing a team member.

And that was what Hiccup was doing right now as he walked through the woods toward the beach. It was a quiet peaceful night, nothing like the last where a certain someone had set his hut on fire. The warm breeze ruffled his hair and cooled his flushed face, clearing his head. Several times Hiccup stopped to listen for any sounds that Barf and Belch was following him. But he had seen the Zippleback fly away again toward the opposite side of the island, probably to get more fish to load into Hiccup's hut and dump on him later.

Well, at least Toothless wouldn't have to hunt tonight.

The thought of his best friend made Hiccup feel guilty. He shouldn't have given Toothless the cold shoulder. It wasn't the Night Fury's fault all of this craziness was happening. Likely he was off hiding in some remote part of the Edge plotting his revenge. Hopefully, in the morning when Hiccup actually managed to apologize, Toothless would accept his peace offering of a thirty-minute dragon massage, and not dump him out of the saddle into sticky mud puddles for a whole week.

Tuffnut and Ruffnut would try anything possible at this point. They were desperate. Hiccup sighed and ran a hand through his hair. He needed to come up with a plan and fast, before things got even more out of hand. Unfortunately, he was fresh out of ideas. They had already tried just about everything, and half of it had gone wrong. How many times could they tempt fate before something actually killed him, or worse, one of the others? Toothless wouldn't always be around to save them.

Maybe Astrid would have some ideas. She was always logical and inventive. He'd ask her later.

Something rustled in the woods behind him. Huh? Hiccup stopped and glanced over his shoulder. Nothing. The path was empty and silent. He started to walk again, then the rustling started up again, this time much closer.

A twig cracked loudly and Hiccup growled in annoyance. Oh for the love of Thor, he thought as he clenched his fists and turned. That didn't sound like a Dragon following him, and the only other rider present for Hiccup's outburst had been Snotlout, who was too busy nursing his swollen jaw to care about anything else. So that let only two people who would bother to stalk him.

"Tuff! Ruff! I know its you!" He hollered. "This isn't funny! Get back to the huts right now and be glad that Fishlegs has the last shift otherwise it would have your names on it, dragon or no!"

There was no response from the twins. Hopefully the threat of extra work would scare them off. Ohhh man, this was such a mess. Sighing, he turned his back on the path.

Hiccup yelped in surprise when a thick, smelly sack was pulled over his head and he was yanked aside and thrown on the ground. Hands grasped his wrists and quickly tied them behind him at the small of his back. A coarse rope was wound tightly around his arms, pinning them and further inhibiting his movement. Then he was picked up, thrown over someone's shoulder like a sack of viking potatoes, and being carried away amidst his protests.

"Gah! Ugh. Really, guys? What did I say?"

The person carrying him, Hiccup assumed it must be Tuffnut, was obviously in a hurry. Hiccup squirmed and wiggled as he tried to get free. Great. Absolutely spectacular. So it was the twins who will do the honors of dumping him in a pile of yak droppings. Could they be more immature?

"I said—I don't—argh, come on guys, I'm serious! Would you let me go? No, seriously, put me down!"

His protests fell on deaf ears. Hiccup resigned himself to a bumpy ride. The twins were mad at him, sure, but did that really merit tying him up and hauling him off to whatever nasty surprise awaited at… wherever he was being taken? Or was it just another attempt to win back their dragon? If that was the case, then now would be a great time for Barf and Belch to show up and 'save him'.

Yeah. Knowing the Zippleback it would probably be after he smelled like yak dung and three day old codfish. Thank you for nothing, you useless reptile.

"Guys," he yelled through the sack. Gods, it smelled like the dragon stable did after a week without cleaning. Couldn't they had least have washed the bag? "I know that you want your dragon back, but isn't this a bit extreme? What are you doing?!"

A hand was gripping his legs to keep him from struggling. Hiccup's protest did not stop but he didn't struggle. Who knows, maybe this newest crazy scheme might work. Barf and Belch would save him, the life debt would be paid, Ruffnut and Tuffnut would get their beloved dragon back, and he and Toothless would finally be rid of the overenthusiastic Zippleback. Life could finally go back to normal on the Edge.

Maybe. If Barf and Belch didn't smite the twins with Logi's fire from above first. Maybe.

Sounds were muffled due to the sack, but Hiccup could hear the rush of water on the beach coming closer. Birds chirped sleepily in the trees. Brambles and twigs crunched underfoot, then became thumps as the rough ground turned into soft sand. Then loud clomping; Hiccup was being carried across the wooden dock, up.

He was starting to get irritated. "Okay, you've had your fun. Now let me go. I mean it, Ruffnut and Tuffnut. Look, I want to get this life debt over with just as much as you two do, but is ridiculous! I don't think Barf and Belch will appreciate this in the slightest! You could get hurt! Guys. Guys!"

With a grunt, someone dumped him on the hard ground. The knot around his neck was undone, and Hiccup snapped as the sack was yanked off, "Okay. This is the single worst plan you have ever come up with."

"Oh, I don't know brother…"

Hiccup found himself facing the red-haired scarred face of none other than Dagur the Deranged, an enemy of Berk and a hunter of dragons. Beside him stood Ryker Grimborn, arms crossed and a satisfied smirk on his face.

"You're our prisoner," Dagur went on, placing his hands on his hips and grinning. "Seems like a brilliant plan to me."

Hiccup's back was pressed against the main mast of a ship. His hands were bound and he was surrounded by dragon hunters. His captors were two of the most ruthless men in the Norse seas. This wasn't a revenge prank. This was a kidnapping.

Oh gods. Astrid was going to kill him.

Review if you want to. Next update should be sometime next week.