Yo. This is an idea I've been writing for the past couple of weeks whenever things were getting a bit hard to handle. I hope it doesn't sound awkward and jumpy, because it wasn't fully connected when I wrote it, and I had to piece it together.

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of its characters...

Sixteen year old Harry Potter stood in the Headmaster's office at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry during an average chilly, rainy afternoon in the middle of October.

"...Run that by me again?"

Dumbledore gazed at the teen before him solemnly, and repeated himself. "My boy, for the sake of the greater good, for the sake of ending the war with Tom, I feel it would be best for everyone if you and Professor Snape bonded-that is to say, married."

Harry blinked. "Yeah, that's what I thought you said. Now, let me retort with a clever and well thought out, are you high, Headmaster?"

Dumbledore seemed quite surprised. "I beg your pardon?"

Despite the question being rhetorical, Harry repeated himself anyway. "Are. You. High?" he intoned slowly, as if speaking to a child. "What gave you the idea that Snape and I would want to do this? We won't even survive without killing each other!"

"Professor Snape, Harry," the old man corrected.

The raven haired teen tried not to roll his eyes, frustration growing. "So, why exactly am I-are we supposed to do this? What would getting married solve? How would it end the war?"

"Love is the answer, Harry."

"The answer to what?"

"Everything, my boy, everything."

"Er, everything?"

"Do you recall, Harry? The power the Dark Lord knows not? It is love."

Again, Harry blinked. "You seriously think I can stop Voldemort by what?-falling in love with Snape?"

If Dumbledore noticed the sarcasm in his tone, he chose to ignore it. "Yes, Harry. I have already spoken to Professor Snape, so I suggest you do the same."

Scowling, the teen decided not to argue, nodded, and with a mandatory goodbye, left the round office, muttering curses under his breath. Once he was standing in the corridor, the gargoyle behind him, he fell into thought. Who should he speak to first? Hermione? Snape? Or the new Defence Against the Dark Arts professor? The latter of those was probably the best place to start. Professor Knight was definitely going to want to hear about this. The others could wait for now.

Nodding to himself Harry decided to do just that and made his way over to the Defence corridor. Classes had already finished for the day, save for Astronomy, and dinner was nearing an end too. Positive the man he was looking for would be marking homework in his office, Harry knocked on the wooden door, noting the corridor was empty.

"Enter," a low voice from within called out.

Harry glanced left and right once more, but pushed the door open. He stepped into the room, shut the door behind him, and approached the large desk at the other end. Professor Knight was seated behind it, head bowed and a quill in hand.

Harry smiled slightly, and took a seat in the dark leather chair across him, not bothering for an invitation, but waiting for the man to finish what he was marking before he spoke. Instead, he took the time to examine the teacher.

He was still fairly young, being in his mid twenties, tall at six three, with a head of silky chestnut colored hair that was swept back off a very attractive face. He was a little on the thin side, but toned and lean, and had a voice that fueled many daydreams and fantasies, particularly among the female population in the castle.

After Umbridge had been driven off by the centaurs of the Forbidden Forest, rumours had begun swirling that Dumbledore was looking for a new Potions Master, so Snape could finally take on the Defence position he had been wanting. However, not long after, Horace Slughorn, the previous Potions professor, and the only Master of the field in Britain, save for Snape, was found dead, killed by Death Eaters, or perhaps Voldemort himself, in the Muggle house he had been hiding out in.

With no one else skilled enough for the position, Snape was left stuck with teaching Potions, and the hunt for the new DADA professor had once more begun. But by this point, nearly everyone was unwilling to teach the class, all having heard of the curse. There wasn't a good track record, after all. Dumbledore was at a loss. He knew that if he couldn't find anyone to teach, the Ministry would send someone else. They didn't need another Umbridge, everyone now believing in the Dark Lord's return or not.

And that was where Harry came in. When Dumbledore had come to escort him from Number Four to the Burrow, he had absently mentioned the difficulties he was having in finding someone to teach Defence.

Harry had then brought up a friend of his. Said friend was Nathan Knight, a Britain born but foreign raised man he had been exchanging letters with for some time now. The man was a Master of Defence, and was already interested in a teaching position, though he had been looking elsewhere. Still, he always had wanted to teach at Hogwarts, and wouldn't this be the perfect opportunity? He wasn't a man easily intimidated either, and, because of Harry, already knew the goings on of the place.

Though Dumbledore had been surprised, and questioned him about this friend, he agreed it was worth looking into. A meeting was swiftly arranged, and after extensive inquiry, Nathan was hired. Needless to say, Harry had been quite pleased. Amused too, because one of the old man's enemies had gotten into the castle without his knowledge, and under his big nose too!

"What has got you in such a cheerful mood, Harry?"

The deep voice drew the teen out of his thoughts, and he blinked, finding himself staring into warm, chestnut colored eyes. Unable to help himself, he smiled. "Just remembering the day you were hired."

"Is that so?"

"Yep. How's the marking going?" he asked, nodding towards the stack of parchment on the large, mahogany desk.

"Finished for the night," the man replied.

"That's good." Harry got up when the professor did, and followed him into his personal quarters. He had been in there more than once, what with the two being close friends and all.

"How was Qudditch practice this morning?" asked Nathan as the door automatically shut behind them.

"Postponed until tomorrow morning. The Slytherins stole our pitch time. Again. I'm starting to wish I hadn't been named Captain. Half the team's new and needs to be trained up, but we're barely getting the time to practice."

Nathan released a low hum. "I'll speak to Severus about it."

"Thanks."

The two came to a stop in the sitting room, and raised their wands. They chanted the same spell, making identical sweeping gestures, and it was only when the tips of both wands glowed green, that they relaxed.

Harry replaced his wand and sank down on the comfiest couch ever (in his humble opinion), and watched as Nathan Knight's appearance changed before his very eyes.

While his height remained the same, his hair darkened until it was the same shade as Harry's, his eyes narrowed slightly as the colour changed from brown to crimson, his nose widened a little, and his lips thinned, even as his shoulders broadened and his skin paled.

When the changes ceased, Harry grinned, emerald gaze passing over the new form. "I miss seeing you like this," he admitted. "The whole Professor Knight thing still feels weird."

The man chuckled lowly. "Indeed," he voiced in agreement. "It will take time. You will simply have to get used to it."

Harry pouted a little. "Yeah," he nodded reluctantly.

The man smirked. "Don't think I do not know what is going through that mind of yours, Harry. The bed will have to wait for the moment."

The teen blinked, then fought not to flush. "Marvolo!" He may not have been a virgin any more, but he was still easily embarrassed, which was more than a little irritating sometimes.

Marvolo laughed, then moved to sit in the armchair opposite the couch. He steadily gazed at Harry for a moment, then spoke. "You have something on your mind."

Harry immediately thought back to what Dumbledore had told him earlier, and scowled. "The goat called me up to his office during dinner."

The Dark Lord straightened immediately, eyes burning. "What did he want?"

"For me to marry Snape."

"...What?"

"He wants me to marry Snape," Harry repeated, even though he knew he had been heard just fine the first time.

Marvolo merely blinked, confusion evident in his expression. "For what purpose?" he questioned finally.

"Because love conquers all, apparently. He thinks Snape and I will get married, fall in love, and I'll somehow be able to beat you with the power of love."

"...He's gone mad."

"I can definitely agree with that," Harry replied with a nod.

Marvolo ran a hand over his face tiredly. "What has Severus said?"

The younger of the two shrugged. "Dumbledore said he's already spoken to Snape and that I should too, but I thought I ought to tell you first."

"I see."

"He's obviously going to refuse, Marvolo," Harry pointed out. "Snape and I may not exactly hate each other, but there's no way we'd actually get married. Like I said to the goat, we'd probably just kill each other." He paused, then added, "I wonder why he wants it to be Snape though. I mean, there are plenty of other guys around. And why a man, for that matter? It isn't as if he knows I'm gay. No one really does, not with the way Ginny's always throwing herself at me."

"Perhaps he wishes for you to bond with someone of a darker nature."

"Then have me marry Mr Ice Prince," Harry retorted. "Then again, I'd rather marry Snape than Draco Malfoy."

Marvolo smirked, but the expression on his face showed he was lost in his complex thoughts, and Harry soon lost himself in his own, though he doubted they were as complicated.

He really wasn't opposed to the thought of marriage or anything. It was just something he hadn't expected Dumbledore of all people to bring up at Hogwarts of all places. He believed love would end the war, that love was the power spoken of in the prophecy, but the teen now knew that said prophecy was a fake, had always been a fake, pulled out by Trelawney via the use of a well placed Imperius Curse.

Dumbledore had been fully aware that Snape had been standing outside that room, listening in. He had known that, at the time, Snape was completely loyal to the Dark Lord and would report back to him once he'd heard the prophecy.

Harry sighed softly and ran his fingers through his hair, turning his attention back to Marvolo. The man had a thoughtful frown on his face, and the student wondered if he actually thought Harry was considering marrying Snape.

"I must speak to Severus and Lucius," stated Marvolo suddenly.

Harry blinked in surprise, but nodded in agreement. "The usual method?"

"Yes."

"Okay, I'll go get Snape." With that, the teen got to his feet and slipped out of the room, making his way down to the dungeons. It was past curfew for the younger students, and Harry didn't care much if the older ones saw him. Everyone was used to his strange behaviour by now, and the Slytherins had quickly discovered that he wasn't about to be bothered or fazed by them any more. None of them really knew why, though some of their parents did...not that they were allowed to say anything about it.

"Potter!"

Harry merely raised a brow. "Draco," he greeted calmly. While most Slytherins no longer bothered him, there were, of course, exceptions. "You'll have to excuse me. I don't have the time for our usual banter at the moment. Is Snape in his classroom?"

"Wha-yeah."

"Cool. Thanks. Later." Harry walked right past a very confused Malfoy, and followed the familiar path to the Potion's classroom, knocking firmly on the door once there.

"Enter."

Well, he sounds like he's in a shit mood. Whatever, not my problem. He opened the door and stepped inside, padding over to the large desk in front of the board. Snape, like 'Nathan' was busy marking homework. But since Snape wasn't the Dark Lord, Harry didn't bother waiting for an acknowledgement, and cleared his throat.

Snape's head snapped up, and he tightened his grip on his quill, a scowl immediately finding a place on his face. "Potter."

Remembering how Dumbledore wanted him to marry this man, the teen bit back a scowl of his own. "Professor Knight wishes to have a word with you."

As one of the few who was aware of Nathan Knight's true identity, Snape's eyes widened a fraction, and he inclined his head. "Very well," he answered neutrally.

"As soon as possible," Harry added with emphasis, wanting to make sure the Potions Master understood. "It's about what Dumbledore wishes for us to do."

Snape's scowl deepened, and he set down his quill, suddenly looking paler than before. Saying nothing, he stood and headed straight for the door, Harry following behind him, a near invisible smirk on his face. The emerald eyed teen was fully aware that Snape wasn't really in any danger, but messing with him was fun. Besides, revenge was sweet.

The two headed up to the Defence corridor, and paused in front of the portrait guarding 'Nathan's' private rooms. It was of a large albino snake with crimson eyes, and a small, dark furred wolf cub. The cub was fast asleep at the moment, but the snake, who was wrapped protectively around the wolf, raised its head to peer at the two males.

"Hogwarts," Harry hissed softly, voicing the password that been set.

The snake inclined its head, and the portrait swung open. Once the two had stepped over the threshold, it fell shut behind them.

With Snape having been in here a fair few times since the beginning of term, Harry didn't bother leading him. He knew where to go. Marvolo was still in the sitting room, and Lucius Malfoy was with him. Harry was a little impressed with how quickly he had made it.

He resumed his seat on the couch, the Dark Lord having moved there as well so Snape and Malfoy could have the armchairs. It wasn't for comfort or anything. He just wanted to be able to see both their faces properly. And it was only once everyone was seated that Marvolo began speaking.

"It has come to my attention that Dumbledore wishes for Severus and Harry to bond in an attempt to end the war."

Neither Harry nor Snape reacted, but Malfoy blinked in confusion, though it appeared he wasn't sure if he should say anything or not. Marvolo didn't ask, and continued.

"Neither of you agree to this."

While it wasn't exactly a question, both professor and student nodded. No, they didn't hate each other. Yes, they tolerated one another at best. This, in no way, shape, or form meant they would survive a marriage, particularly if the war itself was at stake.

"Good," intoned the Dark Lord slowly. Now he focused on the Malfoy. "Lucius, what is the legality in all this?"

The platinum haired man frowned slightly. "You are not yet of age, correct?" he asked Harry.

"No, not until the end of July."

"Who has been your Magical Guardian, discounting Sirius Black?"

"According to the Goblins at Gringotts, Dumbledore."

"I see." Malfoy raised a hand up to his chin, cupping it as he thought. "An underage wizard requires the permission of their guardian to marry. Likewise, if the guardian insists and signs the needed documents, there is nothing the child can do until they are of age." He looked at Harry now. "As your Magical Guardian, it is perfectly legal for Dumbledore to marry you off to Severus, if he so wishes."

"In loco parentis," Harry muttered, remembering reading about the term.

Malfoy inclined his head. "Indeed."

All four males fell into a thoughtful silence, as they pondered on what they could do and how Harry and Severus could get out of this forced marriage. Dumbledore was perfectly capable of doing this, but if he did, it wasn't going to solve a thing, instead, trapping two people in what would no doubt be a very strained marriage.

Harry frowned again. "If Snape and I did end up doing this, what would happen to all my titles? The ones the Goblins say I can't accept until I'm of age?"

"Remind me which titles we are speaking of?" requested the blond.

"Potter, Black, and Peverell."

"Ah, yes. I had forgotten of the third." Malfoy stroked his chin thoughtfully. "I would assume, seeing as it has happened before, Dumbledore would insinuate that as you are the younger of the two in the bond, Severus would be the one in charge of all your titles. However, with Severus having no interest in politics, Dumbledore would coax him into passing control onto himself, as proxy, just as he has been doing already."

Harry, who had been listening closely, nodded. "That definitely sounds possible. He probably thinks I don't know anything about this. I'm sure he assumes I'd go to Hermione if I had questions, but since she's a Muggleborn, she wouldn't know any of this either. Of course, that also means he's underestimating her researching ability. Ron doesn't care about anything that isn't related to food or Qudditch, so he likely wouldn't know either."

Despite knowing all this though, there was still no way out of it, was there...?

Like a bolt from the blue, Harry's eyes suddenly lit up, hit with a sudden revelation. "Question!"

The three men blinked. "Yes?"

"Since I'm not of age, this whole thing relies on my guardian, right?"

"It does, yes."

"My magical guardian, specifically? Or will any legal guardian do?"

"Of course," Marvolo breathed, understanding dawning in his crimson irises. "The Muggles."

Snape's own dark eyes widened slightly, but Malfoy continued to look confused. Harry decided to clarify.

"I live with my aunt and uncle," he spoke. "According to Muggle law, they are my legal guardians. I think that applies in the Wizarding world too, since they were supposed to sigh my Hogsmeade form for me. No one ever said otherwise. And the parents of Muggleborns, like Hermione, sign their forms too, which means they should have a say in all this, right? If Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon sign all the forms, will Dumbledore be able to do anything?"

Understanding where this was going, Malfoy frowned. "While the majority of these sorts of contracts are created and signed for Purebloods, I cannot recall any laws forbidding Muggles from signing in any fashion, likely because this has never occurred before."

"Good," Marvolo interjected before anyone else could speak. He looked over at Harry. "You will marry me instead."

"...Eh?"

The Dark Lord smirked. "You heard me, Kitten."

Too shocked to be embarrassed by the nickname used in front of Snape and Malfoy, the teen just blinked and stared. "I know-I know I heard you," he spoke faintly. "I just think I heard wrong, because I'm pretty sure you just said you wanted me to marry you."

"That, Potter," said Snape, "would mean you did not hear him."

Harry didn't bother rising to the bait, all his attention focused on the crimson eyed man gazing back at him in amusement. "You-you want me to marry you?"

Marvolo raised a brow. "Is that not what I said?"

Harry just nodded, but really wasn't sure what to say. Was he asking this because he wanted to, or was it just to ensure he and Snape didn't? He didn't want to sound corny or anything, but he only wanted to do this if there was love involved. And while he had told Marvolo that he loved him more than once, the man had never said the same. He had shown he did, but it would have been nice to hear the words. Maybe that was just his Gryffindor side talking. After all, didn't they say that 'actions speak louder than words'?

"Harry?"

"Okay."

The Dark Lord actually seemed surprised for a second there. "You agree?"

"Yes, I do."

Now Marvolo smiled, just slightly, before looking back over at Snape. "Did the old man say when he planned on having you bond?"

The Potions Master inclined his head. "Yule. He wishes to give us the time to...get used to the idea and one another."

"I see. Then Harry and I will bond the eve before. That will give you time to take care of the documents, Lucius. Inform me when you require the signatures of the Muggles. I will go to them myself."

Malfoy nodded in acquiesce, and the four remained as they were for a few more moments, finalizing their plans for December. Once finished, they separated, Malfoy returning to his manor, and Snape to the dungeons. After a kiss goodbye, Harry left the room too, needing to return to Gryffindor Tower quickly, since the later curfew was approaching fast and he didn't have his map or cloak on him.

About an hour later, secured in the privacy of his bed, the hangings drawn around it, Harry couldn't stop the grin that stretched out across his face. So, Dumbledore was really expecting him and Snape to bond, huh? He had no idea what he had just done. He was going to regret those orders. Regret it big time.

Time passed. Harry wasn't sure what was happening with those documents Malfoy was dealing with, but Marvolo was making sure to keep him informed, even though he didn't understand a lot of the more...technical law terms. The only other thing he noted was that Dumbledore looked oddly smug whenever he happened to catch that twinkling blue gaze on him. It was actually quite irritating.

Still, Harry was pleased the old man's plans were already in the midst of being completely and utterly foiled. And he didn't even know it! The irony! The funny thing was, while Dumbledore didn't seem at all suspicious, he seemed to find it odd that Harry and Snape weren't behaving at all different than before. What he had been expecting, the two didn't know. Just the thought of them becoming all lovey-dovey with one another was sickening. Marvolo seemed to find that rather amusing, for a reason unfathomable to the teen.

October passed into November, and November into December. As the days went by, both students and teachers began preparing for Christmas, or Yule, as others continued to call it. The castle was decorated as extravagantly as ever, and on the evening of the final day of classes before the holidays, Dumbledore made an announcement during dinner. An announcement claiming he would have another announcement to make on the morning of the first day back from the break, concerning the bonding (marriage, he clarified for the Muggle raised students) of one of the professors, though he didn't name who. Perfect.

Harry didn't at all regret what he was getting into. He really did care for Marvolo, and had for some time now. After he had been taken to the graveyard during the third task of the Tri-Wizard Tournament, and Voldemort had been resurrected, the Dark Lord had learned of the teen being a Parselmouth when he had spoken to Nagini, which had led him to discovering he was also his Horcrux.

Having always been a smart man, it hadn't taken Voldemort long to figure out what had happened, or that he and Harry had both been set up by Dumbledore. The Gryffindor had been reluctant to believe it all at first, but the tests and trials he had been put through since being left with the Dursleys and then starting at Hogwarts had been proof enough.

The two had begun discussions, careful ones, at first, trying to gauge where the other stood in this war they were taking part in, and this was when the identity of Nathan Knight had been created. The discussions lengthened and deepened as they went further into detail, and eventually, they reached common ground.

As a child who was being forced to take part in this battle, Harry would become neutral, and try to convince those dearest to him to do the same. These people would be on a list of sorts, one that would mean the Dark could not harm them, or face severe consequences. While Harry agreed to this at the time, it didn't take him very long to realize he was better suited to the Dark, though he had no desire to torture or kill anyone himself.

And as the discussions continued, the two started to become equals. They learned about each others' pasts and childhoods, and soon after, other odd feelings began to rear their heads, filling them both with confusion. It was at this time that Voldemort took part in another ritual, regaining his old body back, one the approximate age as his Nathan Knight persona.

The two corresponded all through fifth year, and Marvolo was the one to...deal with Umbridge after she had been run off by the centaurs. He had been furious to learn about the Blood Quill. And then, that summer, Harry had gone to stay with him, which was when they had finally become intimate.

Of course, Harry hadn't exactly been given permission to leave Privet Drive, but with the Order guard having been pulled for some unexplained reason, it hadn't been that difficult to get away, especially after having bribed the Dursleys. He had prepared an excuse regardless, just in case. With the death of his godfather, he was perfectly at liberty to rebel a little. But what Dumbledore and the Order (discounting Remus, Bill, Charlie, Fred, George, and Hermione) didn't know, was that Sirius was alive, healthy, and hidden in an undisclosed location, protected by some of Marvolo's very powerful spells. They were still working on freeing him from his fugitive status, but it was harder than previously assumed.

Harry had returned to Privet Drive a few hours after Dumbledore's letter had arrived, and when the old man had shown up himself, he hadn't said a word about Harry not having been there all summer. Meaning he either really had no idea, or he was ignoring it. It was difficult to be sure which. Not that the boy cared.

It was Christmas Eve and Harry, dressed in his finest (courtesy of Narcissa's fashion sense), was sneaking out of the castle under his Invisibility Cloak, Marauders' Map in hand. He met up with Marvolo and Snape in the cellar of Honeydukes, and after exchanging a nod, the three Apparated away.

Soon, they were walking into a large ballroom of Malfoy Manor, which had been decorated specially for this event, probably mostly thanks to Narcissa. She was in there with the three of them, along with Lucius, Sirius, Remus, Bill, and of course, the old Minister who was to marry them. They didn't want to have too many people, lest they draw attention to what was happening.

Marvolo and Harry came to a stop in front of the Minister, facing one another, and now the ceremony began as they two exchanged vows, before signing the required documents, the teen noting the familiar signature of both Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon. As he signed himself, he absently wondered if they had put up a fuss at all. Well, that wasn't important. He was never going to have to return there again, now that he was married, underage or not.

Once everything was taken care of, Harry had only just stepped back, when he was yanked into a tight bear hug. He grinned and looked up at his godfather's face. Most would have expected Sirius to be angry that his godson had just married the Dark Lord of all people, but with the Dark being the only side helping not just him but Remus and Harry as well, he wasn't about to fuss. Especially as it was clear Harry was as in love with Marvolo as James had been with Lily.

Remus was the next to pull Harry into an embrace, more gentle than his friend's, as he quietly told the teen how proud of him he was. He knew, despite the circumstances, that James and Lily would be too. Bill congratulated him as well, promising to let Charlie and the twins know things had gone well. Narcissa let go of her propriety for a moment to hug him as well, and Lucius Malfoy looked on in approval, even as Snape gave him an almost invisible smile. He approved too, though he was more glad he wasn't the one getting bonded.

They celebrated for a little longer, before the newlyweds and Snape returned to Hogwarts, though Harry remained with his new...husband, joining him in his private quarters as Marvolo dragged him straight to the bed, Harry blushing the entire way, even though they had already done this more than once.

All in all, it was a very enjoyable night...

When Harry woke the next morning, it was with a headache and a sore body. He groaned softly in discomfort, and cuddled in closer to the warm body under him. He was a little confused about all this at first, until the memories of the previous evening and night returned. He was bonded-married. Marvolo-Lord Voldemort, was his...husband.

What an odd thought.

As if having heard where his mind had been wandering, which was actually a possibility, the man stirred. "Mmm, good morning, Kitten," he greeted, dragging his long fingers through Harry's messy hair.

The teen smiled abashedly. "Morning."

Marvolo ran a thumb over Harry's bottom lip, his own smile turning into a smirk when he heard his young husband's breath catch, just as it always did when he did this. "We have another big day ahead of us, little one."

Harry nodded. "Dumbledore's gonna be pretty surprised when he can't marry me off to Snape."

"Indeed he will. But we have plenty of time until lunch. Until then-" He ran his fingers down Harry's spine.

Emerald eyes widened as his back arched, and he felt his cheeks heating again. He moaned softly, digging his nails into Marvolo's chest as the man's hand traveled lower...

After a very enjoyable morning, Harry headed to the Great Hall for lunch, joining his his friends Hermione, Neville, and Luna, and the others. With it being the holidays, and most students gone home, House seating didn't matter as much, so he settled at Gryffindor table between the girls. His three friends all shot him pleased grins, all aware of what had happened the night before, and he grinned in turn.

As he served himself some food, felling utterly ravenous, he glanced up at the Head Table, finding that Dumbledore was watching him with a frown on his face. Unable to help himself, Harry smirked, pleased when that frown deepened in return. No doubt the old man couldn't understand why he was so pleased when he would be getting bonded to Snape later that day.

The day passed uneventfully, and finally, near dinner time, Harry was called up to the Headmaster's office. He headed up without fuss, and stood before the desk, Snape a couple of feet to his left, face impassive. Dumbledore shot them both a confused look, before smiling cheerfully, eyes twinkling away like it was nobody's business. He got to his feet and pulled out his wand.

"Um, sir, there's probably something I should-"

"I'm afraid I cannot break this bond, Harry," said Dumbledore before the teen could even finish his sentence. "This must be done, you understand. It is all for the greater good."

"But, that's not-"

"Albus, list-"

The Headmaster cut them off as he started the ceremony without preamble, unwilling to let this chance slip. He chanted away in Latin, his words sounding different from the ones used by the Minister the previous evening. Harry didn't understand, but Marvolo had already warned him about this, so it wasn't concerning. The things he'd signed last night couldn't be broken so easily.

A golden thread came out of the end of Dumbledore's wand, wrapping around Snape, before coiling around Harry. It was meant to tether them together. But before it could attach itself at the other end, it broke off, leaving the old man gaping like a fish. Snape and Harry both smirked.

At first, the Headmaster had no idea what had gone wrong, sure he had pronounced all the words properly. Then he noticed something odd. The gold thread was still coiled around Snape, but not Harry. That could only mean one thing, but...how was that-? He looked at the boy's face, and frowned at the sight of the smug grin. "Harry, what have you done?"

Harry simply shrugged. "Hey, I tried to tell you before you started, but I'm already married-er, bonded." And the intensity of the alarm that crossed the old man's face had him wondering if he was about to have a heart attack. He kind of wished he would.

"To-to whom?" questioned Dumbledore in shock, unable to believe his weapon had just deceived him like this. Without him knowing about it too!

"To me," came a cool voice from a few feet away.

The Headmaster's head snapped up, even as Harry and Snape glanced over their shoulders, while the portrait Headmasters/mistresses all looked too. Nathan Knight stood in the doorway, examining his fingernails in disinterest. Seeing the attention on him now, he stepped into the room, coming to a stop when he was standing directly next to Harry.

He wrapped a firm arm around the teen and drew him closer, chestnut eyes filling with anger as he looked at the old fool. "I must say I do not at all appreciate you attempting to bond my husband off to another man."

"The boy and I did try to tell him," said Snape in a long suffering tone.

"He just cut us off!" added Harry, enjoying himself immensely.

"Harry! Why would you do this?" questioned Dumbledore, looking very disappointed, not that the grandfatherly persons was about to do anything to help.

The teen merely raised a dark brow, not at all impressed. "Hey, it was your idea."

"...Pardon me?"

"You were the one who said love would end the war. So there you go! I don't know where you got the idea Snape and I would ever fall in love, so I decided to go and marry the man I actually do love!"

Before Dumbledore could say anything more, Nathan once more focused his attention on him. "While I haven't a clue how you even have the authority to do this in the first place, the next time you wish to marry one of your students off with a professor, do make sure neither of them are already bonded in the first place." He dismissed the Headmaster with a cold look, and gazed down at his young husband instead, the cold melting into warmth. "Come, Harry, let us get you something to eat. Your friends have been searching for you."

The two began to walk away, Snape following behind them, a satisfied smirk on his face as he listened in silence, pleased he had chosen to remain on the winning side.

"Really?"

"Yes. Granger will not stop pacing, Longbottom will not stop worrying, and please don't ask me what Lovegood was going on about."

Harry laughed cheerfully as the three, completely ignoring the old man's indignant sputtering, began descending the spiral staircase, before the teen stopped abruptly.

"Harry?"

The teen looked up at both men, a grin on his face. "Didn't Dumbledore make an announcement a few days back about another announcement of the bonding of one of the professors? The students won't forget, will they? Does that mean he's going to announce his failure to the entire castle? After all, me marrying you instead of Snape is a huge failure in his eyes."

"Oh yes," said Nathan softly, crimson flashing through chestnut. "A great failure for him," he leaned down, brushing his lips over Harry's, "but a great success for us, my dear, dark love."

Wizarding Britain was never the same again...

Fin.

Looking forward to reviews! Laterz!