AN: Illaoi is one of my favorite champs in a long time, and I wanted to write her a quick story because she didn't show up in Unholy Alliance. This is just a little one-shot flash fiction style thing. Uploading it because hey, someone might enjoy it.

Trinkets and talismans jingled from her hips as Illaoi walked through the bustling Bilgewater marketplace. Whether it was due to her odd clothing, her massive physique, or the enormous totem she carried, the common shoppers seemed to avoid the priestess, ducking out of her way while doing their best to pretend they were ignoring her. She felt a smile tugging at her lips. That was just fine with her. Made it much easier to go about her more mundane business.

A nearby fruit stand caught her eye, and Illaoi couldn't help but be drawn towards it. She had spent the past few days in deep meditation, conferring with the spirit of Nagakaborous. Her god was wise, and powerful, but supernatural beings tended to ignore how hungry their mortal conduits could get after hours of continuous channeling. Resting the rock between her head and shoulder, Illaoi approached the stall, pulling a few coins from her pocket.

The attendant was an elderly man, one eye missing with what seemed to be the distinctive burns of a pistol shot surrounding its socket. That was surely an interesting story, but not one she had the time to hear. Illaoi pressed three Serpents into her palm and dropped them on the front of the cart.

"What can I get for this?"

The salesman glanced over the money briefly before snatching it up. Reaching an arm back, he pulled forth a small cart of fresh fruit.

"Any five things outta here." he grumbled. "Six, because I like your tattoos, lady."

Illaoi chortled, a deep booming laugh. "Why, thank you." She began to search through the presented stock, and settled on a few grapefruits, a lime, and an orange. With a last nod to the cart attendant, she departed into a nearby alleyway.

With the rest of her purchase left in her bag, Illaoi took a bite out of the orange, not bothering to peel away the skin. Life was too short to worry about such things. Mentally, she began preparing her route back to the Temple. She'd need to cross this alley, head upwards from the Slaughter Docks, and…

The Priestess' train of thought was interrupted as the orange was snatched from her hand. Shocked, Illaoi watched as a cloaked figure dashed ahead of her, prize in hand. Pickpockets and thieves were nothing new in Bilgewater, and shouting about one would likely just attract more. Illaoi would simply have to deal with this herself. She grinned again. That was how she preferred things anyway.

The thief was quick, but Illaoi was certainly no slouch either. The towering mystic dashed after her quarry, eyes locked on the cloak as it flurried with the pickpocket's movements. Something was odd about all this. What kind of thief stole half-eaten fruit? And, of all the targets, someone as imposing as Illaoi? She could only come up with two answers.

A desparate one.

The cloak turned a corner and scrambled down a small side-street, leaping over a stack of crates. Illaoi simply burst her way through the flimsy barricade. She'd pay the shop owner reparation fees later. The thief slowed down, but a glance over the shoulder seemed to show that Illaoi wouldn't be stopped by such a pathetic obstacle, and she could hear panting as the pickpocket entered a mad dash for the nearest alley.

Or, perhaps, simply a bad one.

Anyone who knew Bilgewater as well as Illaoi did was aware of how the streets were laid out. For this reason, she simply walked to the entrance of the alley, laughing as the thief's progress was blocked by a stone wall. Of all the side paths in Bilgewater, this was one of the few dead ends.

Hefting her totem into her hands, Illaoi strode slowly towards the panicked pickpocket, who seemed unarmed. They made no move to reach for a pistol or blade as the Priestess bore down on them, her shadow engulfing the alley.

"Don't be shy, now. Show me your face."

Lurching forward, Illaoi tore the cloak from her target. Beneath was a young woman, by her estimate, around nineteen. Her hair was matted and disheveled, as if it hadn't been cut or washed in weeks, and the rags she wore were ill-fitting. Her cheeks were gaunt, and her eyes were fixed on Illaoi's, but the terror was clear within her.

"Don't...kill me."

Her voice was raspy. Illaoi frowned.

"I'm not the one who gets to make that decision, child."

Before she could question it, the thief was suddenly struck by a ghostly appendage. A translucent tentacle had erupted from Illaoi's totem, ripped something from her chest, and between them, a scene began to play out with ghostly forms.

Illaoi watched closely as the spirit of a man dressed in sailing clothes handed a bag of coins to the thief's spirit.

"Spend that carefully, Alessa. I don't know how much more of a haul we'll get this month."

"Alessa?" Illaoi asked, eyebrow raised.

The thief recoiled in shock, eyes wide. Apparently, she could not hear the voices. But the ears of Nagakaborous were always open.

"How did…"

"Hush."

The scene before them shifted and changed. The man from before was standing on the Slaughter Docks, a sword clenched tightly in his hands. There was an open wound on his leg, and he was limping. Alessa seemed to tense up as she watched the man struggle his way forward. To Illaoi's surprise, another figure entered the scene, a phantom made of swirling mists, that gave itself a familiar form. An ethereal Sarah Fortune pointed her weapon at the man, and fired. He crumpled to the ground, the bullet landing cleanly in the back of his head.

Alessa began to sob, falling to her knees. Around her, ghostly tentacles rose from the ground, shaking and squirming as Illaoi spoke.

"So, your...brother, he worked for Gangplank?"

No answer. She did not require one.

"And Fortune's got a bit of a vendetta on her hands right now. She gunned him down, and now you're left with no one to feed you? Forced to steal from anyone you can?"

Another sob, but no real answer. Illaoi had seen enough. The spirits whispered in her ear, and she knew it was time to administer the test. With a wave of Illaoi's hand, the spectral tentacles began to smash into Alessa. She shouted as they crashed against her, seemingly phasing through to batter her very soul.

"So, what will you do? Will you starve and die?" Illaoi's voice raised as the tentacles slammed, adding almost a sickly drumbeat to her words. "Or will you live and fight? For food, for him, for revenge?"

Alessa opened her eyes. She struck out with both fists, beating back the tentacles as she struggled to her feet, the many spectral assailants continuing their attacks.

"I will."

At her words, the tentacles stopped. As quickly as they had appeared, they were gone, seemingly sinking back into Illaoi's totem. For a moment, the two women simply stared at eachother. Then, Illaoi spoke.

"You have a strong will. But no talent. At least, not yet. You will find your way, but it will take some practice."

Somewhat reluctantly, Illaoi reached into her pouch, gathering the rest of the fruit she had bought. She handed it to Alessa, who seemed taken aback by the gesture. "This ought to keep you fed while you work on your "trade"." She turned, and began to leave the alley.

"Wait."

"Hmm?" Illaoi turned, looking over Alessa again.

"You asked what I'm fighting for. I think you should-"

Illaoi scoffed. "Do not worry, child. I'm not concerned with your reasons. Only that you act. That is the way of Nagakaborous."

As she left the stunned thief behind, Illaoi muttered a muffled complaint at her god. Yes, the Bearded Lady was wise, and his way could give that girl the chance to become great. But why did the Priestess always have to be hungry?