Shots in the Night

(A Hogan's Heroes Fanfiction)

NOTE: I do not own any of the characters of the Hogan's Heroes. These characters belong to Bernard Fein, Albert S. Ruddy, and associates.

"What do you mean I need a new guard?" Colonel Klink asked. "I have as many guards as needed, and I certainly don't need a private to…"

"I do not want your excuses, Klink!" an angry Burkhalter shouted through the phone. "Private Langer is my great nephew."

"On second thought, sir, I do need a night watchman."

"Good, he will be arriving in two days."

"Thank you, sir, I can't express…."

"Shut up, Klink! Heil Hitler."

"Oh, yes. Heil Hitler."

Colonel Klink quickly hung up the phone and busied himself with some paperwork.

"Okay, LeBeau. Your mission is to deliver this information to a Dr. Edgar Klein in this restaurant in Hammelburg. He will be in German uniform. He will say 'You look familiar, do you not?' and you will say, 'Yes, you are Julia's father.' Then he will say, 'Julia has spoken much about you.' And you will reply, 'I have not forgotten her even in this war. Please see that this gets to her.' Then you give him the papers and leave," Colonel Hogan said.

"Oui, Colonel. But what about that new guard that Klink was talking about with Burkhalter?" LeBeau questioned.

"He won't be here for two days," Colonel Hogan replied. "Just don't stay out too long."

"Don't worry, Colonel," LeBeau said as he made his way into the barracks entrance of the tunnel. Hogan watched as the short Frenchman disappeared into the frame of the bed and shut the entrance behind him.

LeBeau hurried through the passageways in the tunnel until he came to the exit that was disguised as a tree stump. He carefully lifted it up ever so slightly and took a look around.Good, no one in sight. He lifted the stump top the rest of the way, got out and shut it softly. Then he ran swiftly through the woods towards Hammelburg.

"Colonel, London just sent a message," Kinchloe said holding out a piece of paper.

Hogan took the folded paper and read it to himself. When he finished reading he said, "Looks like London wants us to knock out the munitions base that's two miles east from here. LeBeau, I need you to…" Hogan started. "Where's LeBeau?" he asked looking around the room.

"Colonel, LeBeau hasn't come back yet," Carter said.

"Not back yet, he's been gone for over three hours!" He laid his head on his palm and sighed heavily.

"We could do the mission without him, sir," Carter piped up.

"No, we couldn't have done it tonight anyway. It'll have to be tomorrow night before the new private comes. Kinch, radio London and find out all you can about Private Langer, Burkhalter's great nephew. We need to know more about him." Kinchloe nodded and made his way to the tunnel. "Carter, we'll need some dynamite and a detonator. And Newkirk, you keep an eye out for LeBeau. He should've been back by now."

Colonel Klink was busy doing his paperwork when he heard a knock at the door. "Come in."

"Herr Kommandant, there is a Private Langer waiting to see you," Sergeant Schultz said.

"Private Langer? But I'm not expecting him for another two days. There must be some mistake."

"No mistake. He was sent by General Burkhalter, and he is anxiously waiting to see you."

"Fine, send him in."

Schultz saluted and motioned for the man to enter. The man that entered was tall and handsome with dark brown hair and a mustache. "Colonel Klink, I am here reporting for duty," he said gruffly as he stood at attention.

"General Burkhalter just told me today that you would be here in two days."

"The General is mistaken. I have papers here from my former kommandant," he said handing them over to Klink.

"Hmmm," Klink mumbled looking them over. "Alright, you will accompany Sergeant Schultz tonight when he is on guard duty at the main gate."

"Jawohl, Herr Kommandant!" Lange said as he saluted.

"Schultz, show Private Langer to his quarters."

"Jawohl, Herr Kommandant! Exactly where would that be?"

"Schultz!" Klink shouted threateningly. "Dismissed."

"Colonel, while we've been here chattering away, a staff car has come in and dropped off that new private," Newkirk said.

"Hurry, the coffee pot." The men scrambled for the coffee pot (which doubled as a listening device in Klink's office) and listened. After a few seconds of silence, Hogan said, "It's too late, we've missed them."

Soon it was dark out, and Private Langer accompanied Schultz to the main gate. "Any words of advice before my first night as a guard?" Langer asked Schultz.

"All you must remember is to keep your eyes out for anything suspicious, and do not shoot."

"You mean these are loaded?"

"Of course they are loaded. How else would you expect them?"

LeBeau went through the woods quietly. He took off the German uniform and hid it inside a hollow tree, then he approached the edge of the stalag. It seemed quiet—too quiet, so he moved a little closer and looked to see if there was any unexpected company around.

Soon after Langer took his post with Schultz, the Sergeant fell asleep. Since Langer had never done this kind of work before, he began to walk quietly back and forth by the gate. He heard a branch snap in the woods a little beyond the gate, so he slowly picked up his binoculars and peered through them. He saw a man clad in red standing by a tree watching the stalag intently. He raised his gun, forgetting what Schultz had told him and fired a few shots at the man.

The noise of the gun going off woke up Schultz.

"Achtung! Sound the alarm! There's a man in the woods! There's a man in the woods!"

Schultz joined in the shouting, and the guards in the watch towers sounded the alarms. Soon the dogs were let loose and chaos broke out.

Colonel Klink came running outside in his nightcap and shouted to Langer and Schultz, "What is going on?"

"There's a man in the woods, Herr Kommandant," Langer replied.

"What were those shots I heard?"

"I fired at him, sir," Langer replied happily.

"Fired at him? What if he was German? Or one of our prisoners? Or someone from the Gestapo?"

Before the Private could answer, the guards shouted that they had found the man.

Colonel Hogan had been lying in bed trying to sleep for half an hour wondering what had happened to LeBeau. His thoughts were interrupted by gunfire and then the alarm. He leapt out of bed and opened the door. Soon, the rest of the men were clamoring at the door to see what was going on. Dogs were running around, Klink was outside in his pajamas and nightcap, the guards were in complete and utter confusion, and there was total chaos. They almost laughed at how funny the whole situation looked. But soon they grew somber as one of the guards carried a man to the Kommandant. Hogan and the others poured out of the barracks and hurried to see what was happening. They all became quiet when they saw what it was. It was LeBeau unconscious and covered in blood.

When Colonel Klink saw the man and the blood he asked, "Langer, didn't Schultz tell you not to shoot?"

"Jawohl, Herr Kommandant. But he was…."

Newkirk stepped out of the crowd of men and angrily shouted, "You bloody Kraut! You shot him! I'm gonna….."

Hogan saw what was happening and tried with all his might to hold Newkirk back. But in his anger, he was stronger than Hogan and quickly pushed him to the ground. The other men all put in a collaborative effort and kept him from jumping on the Private.

"Colonel Klink, I demand that you lock this man up in the cooler! He threatened me!"

"Schultz, handcuff the Englander at once," Colonel Klink ordered.

"Jawohl, Herr Kommandant." He pulled out the handcuffs and walked over to Newkirk. "I'm sorry, Newkirk," he whispered as he slipped them onto him and locked them into place.

"Wait, Colonel Klink! Can't we worry about LeBeau first? He may be dying," Hogan reasoned.

"Wait, don't take him to the cooler yet," Klink ordered.

"Do any of you have any medical training?" Hogan asked the large crowd of fellow prisoners.

A man named McPherson stepped forward. "I've had medical training. Let me see him." The crowd of men parted to let McPherson through. "I need some light."

"Guards! Shine one of your lights over here!" Colonel Klink shouted to the guards in the guard towers. The guards, who had been curiously watching from up above, quickly turned the searchlights until they rested on the downed Frenchman

"Now someone help me get his coat off," McPherson ordered. Hogan moved quickly and helped him. "I've found the entry point." He pointed to LeBeau's side.

Carter edged his way over to LeBeau. "There's some blood on his head, too."

Hogan took a look at the area around LeBeau's hairline and said, "A bullets grazed his head, too. It's not that bad."

"Just how many shots did you fire, Langer?" an annoyed Colonel Klink asked.

"A few shots, Herr Kommandant. Four or five."

"What should we do?" Sergeant Schultz questioned.

"Someone needs to call an ambulance. He's lost a lot of blood," McPherson stated.

"Schultz, call an ambulance at once," Klink ordered quickly.

"Jawohl, Herr Kommandant. Right away," Schultz said as he rushed off to Klink's office.

"He's coming to." McPherson moved closer to LeBeau's head. "LeBeau, can you hear me?"

"Papa, est ce vous?" LeBeau mumbled opening his eyes ever so slightly.

"What did he say?" Klink asked suspiciously.

"I think he said, 'Father, is that you?' He must be delirious. What should we do, MacPherson?" Hogan asked.

"Keep talking to him and apply pressure to the wounds. We have to try to keep him awake," he said as he pressed his handkerchief into the wound in LeBeau's side while Hogan applied pressure to his head.

LeBeau cried out in pain. "Papa, s'il vous plait faire cesser!" LeBeau's hands tried to push away MacPherson's.

"No, LeBeau. I have to apply pressure."

"Je ne comprends pas. Suis je pas en France? Qu'est it en train de m'arriver?" LeBeau shouted in rapid French.

Hogan translated, "He thinks he is in France. He's not understanding English, and he doesn't know what's going on. Does anyone speak French? I can only translate."

"Colonel, I can speak for you," another Frenchman shouted. He approached LeBeau and said, "Vous etes en Stalag 13 en Allemagne. Vous avez ete tire. Calm-toi, tu seras bien." (You are in Stalag 13 in Germany. You were shot. Calm down, you will be okay).

Schultz rushed back, "The ambulance is on its way, Herr Kommandant."

"Thank you, Schultz. At ease." Colonel Klink looked back to LeBeau. "How is he?"

"He's holding his own. But it's pretty bad."

"I hear the ambulance," Schultz added.

LeBeau's breathing was very choppy, and he struggled to say, "S'il vous plait faire cesser la douleur! Je ne peux pas le prendre!" (Please make the pain stop! I can't take it anymore).

"L'ambulance est sur son chemin." (The ambulance is on its way).

"Guards, open the gate for the ambulance!" Klink commanded.

As soon as the ambulance was through, the attendants jumped out. "Where was he shot?"

"He was shot in the side. Another bullet grazed his head. He's very confused and delusional. He is not understanding English at the moment."

The medic bent down and quickly examined LeBeau. "Alright. Let's get him in at once. He's critical!" the German shouted.

"Kommandant, request permission for me and some of my men to come along with LeBeau," Colonel Hogan said.

"Request denied," Klink replied quickly.

"But Kommandant, LeBeau may be dying." He lowered his voice, "It may be our last time to see him. Please."

Klink looked from LeBeau to Hogan. "Who did you have in mind?"

"The Frenchman, myself, and Newkirk."

"Why Newkirk? Why not Carter or Kinch or one of the others? You're not planning an escape are you?"

"Newkirk is LeBeau's best friend and I…" Hogan started.

"Herr Kommandant, do not let this prisoner 'Newkirk' leave this camp. He tried to attack an officer and should be duly punished," Langer said.

"Colonel Hogan is right. If LeBeau is truly dying, they should be with him. Schultz, un-handcuff the Englander. He will be punished later."

"Jawohl," Schultz said as he un-handcuffed Newkirk.

"Everybody back to the barracks!" Colonel Klink shouted. "Schultz, you will accompany Colonel Hogan and his men to the hospital."

Hogan, Schultz, Newkirk, and the Frenchman named Andre climbed into the ambulance. Everyone watched as it drove out of the barracks and into the night.

As soon as the ambulance started moving, the German medics got to work on LeBeau, manually taking his vitals, maintaining pressure on the wounds, and trying to keep him conscious.

"You need to stay awake. No, stay awake," the medic said to LeBeau.

Andre bent over LeBeau, "Vous avez besoin de rester evelle."

While the medics were busying themselves about LeBeau, Newkirk turned to Hogan, "You think he's going to make it, Colonel?"

Hogan lowered his voice, "I don't have enough medical knowledge to know for sure, but he doesn't look too good."

Soon they were arriving at the hospital. The medics lifted the stretcher out of the ambulance and rushed him inside. When Newkirk and the others tried to follow LeBeau into the room, one of the medics said, "I'm sorry, but you will have to wait out here. We have to take him to surgery."

"Kommandant, I really must protest this allowance of prisoners to leave the stalag," Private Langer said angrily.

"The man may be dying, and I sent my best guard along with them. I see nothing wrong with that," Colonel Klink countered.

"I think you are really wrong. Just wait and see."

"Dismissed, Private."

"Jawohl, Herr Kommandant."

As soon as Private Langer was in his quarters, he called General Burkhalter. "Yes, General. This is Private Langer."

"Ah, Hans, how do you like it at Stalag 13?"

"That's what I wanted to talk to you about."

"I figured that much. What has Klink done now?"

"That dummkopf has let some prisoners leave the stalag including one who tried to attack me. I tried to stop him, but he would not listen."

"Why would he let prisoners leave the stalag? Even Klink is not that stupid…At least I do not think he is."

"A prisoner was shot, and a huge commotion was caused."

"A prisoner shot? I will come by tomorrow…and do not tell Klink. I would like to make it a surprise visit. Don't worry, Hans. I will see that it is all sorted out."

"Jawohl, Herr General."

"Heil Hitler!"

"Heil Hitler!"

"Are you the guard sent from Stalag 13 for Corporal LeBeau?" the doctor asked Schultz.

"Yes, how is LeBeau?" Schultz asked as the group gathered around.

"He got through surgery alright. But he was still very weak and disoriented when we took him in. He hasn't come to yet, but you can go in and see him now."

The group made their way into the small room in the hospital set aside for POW's. What they saw was not what any of them had expected. Instead of seeing the small but mighty Frenchman that they all knew and loved, they saw a frail-looking man covered in bandages. His head was bandaged as well as his abdomen. He did not stir as they approached the cot.

"Poor little Cockroach," Schultz whispered.

The next day arrived and Hogan and his men still hadn't returned from the hospital. Colonel Klink was just about to call the hospital when he was told that General Burkhalter had arrived.

"General Burkhalter, what a pleasant surprise. I wasn't expecting you," Colonel Klink said nervously.

"Shut up, Klink! I think you know why I am here."

"I assure you General that I do not."

"I am here to find out about the shooting and why you let a man leave the stalag who tried to harm Private Langer."

"General, I think you are missing some of your information."

"I think my great nephew is a very reliable source. Although he wasn't very specific. Tell me exactly what happened."

"Well, Sir, Corporal LeBeau was shot by your great nephew last night…."

"MY great nephew?"

"Yes sir, Private Langer. He saw something move in the woods outside the stalag and shot at it. Might I add sir, against my orders."

"Where is the Corporal now?"

"He was taken to the hospital with multiple wounds. Two severe ones, I think it was. Colonel Hogan, Corporal Newkirk, and Private Andre accompanied the Frenchman to the hospital under the supervision of Sergeant Schultz."

"Which prisoner tried to hurt Hans?"

"Corporal Newkirk got…a bit agitated at his friend being shot."

"Why did you let these prisoners leave?"

"The Frenchman was very bad off, and they were convinced he may not live. So I allowed them to go with a guard in case…"

"I see…and has anything happened?"

"I was just about to go down to the hospital. I haven't heard anything yet."

"I think I will go with you, if only to see if there really was a shooting last night."

Newkirk moved closer to LeBeau. "Louie, ole mate, wake up. Come on, wake up." LeBeau moaned softly bringing Hogan and the others closer. "Come on, LeBeau."

LeBeau moaned again and opened his eyes. "I don't want to wake up. I'm so tired."

"You really had us scared there, LeBeau," Hogan said.

"Colonel, I did not know you were here," LeBeau said struggling to sit up. He winced at the movement.

"Don't try to get up, you're not well," Newkirk said slowly pushing him back down.

"My head is pounding so hard…What happened?"

"That bloody new private shot you is what happened!" Newkirk shouted angrily.

"Please…lower your voice. It makes my head hurt," LeBeau groaned.

"Sorry, LeBeau. I lost me head for a minute."

"Maybe you should go outside for a while and cool off for a bit, Newkirk," Hogan replied softly.

Newkirk started to protest, but Colonel Hogan shot him a warning look. "Yes, sir." Newkirk went out into the hallway and nearly ran into Klink, Burkhalter, and Langer.

"What are you doing here, Corporal?" Burkhalter asked.

"Just visiting my ole buddy, General."

"Then why aren't you in the room with him?"

"I got too loud shouting about that incompetent Private." He pointed to Langer threateningly.

"If you don't mind, we would like to see him for ourselves. I'm having a hard time believing he was even shot at all."

"How bad off am I?" LeBeau asked.

"Well, your head was grazed by one of the bullets, and the other had to be extracted from your side. Other than that, you're as fit as can be." Hogan stated. "But you sure didn't look it when the guards carried you into camp."

"You mean there was blood?"

"Lots of it."

"Lots of it?"

"Yes, like this blood here," Hogan said holding up LeBeau's blood-soaked shirt. LeBeau's eyes widened, and he passed out.

"Why did you do that, Colonel Hogan?" Schultz asked.

"That way if Klink shows up, we'll have an excuse to stay here longer and in turn do our mission."

"But of course….What mission?"

"Our mission from London to blow up the munitions base." He paused. "We're really looking forward to it, you know."

"Jolly Joker. How would you get a mission assigned to you from London? You haven't even been there since before the war started."

"It's simple, Schultz. We used our secret radio."

"Secret radio? What are you doing with a secret radio? Hogan, you went too far! I must report this to the Kommandant! It would be worth my life if I do not report this!"

"We'll only be gone for an hour. We'll go to the plant as German officers, get a tour, set some charges, blow it up, and be back before dinnertime."

"I know nothing! Nothing! Nothing! So what do we do now?"

"Wait until Klink arrives."

The door opened and in walked Klink, Burkhalter, and Langer.

"How did you do that?" Schultz whispered in amazement.

"Where is the Corporal?" Burkhalter asked.

"He's right here," Andre said moving aside.

"I can't believe it! Hans, why did you do this?"

"I…I was trying to….."

"Shut up. I do not want your excuses. You disobeyed your Kommandant's orders and will be punished. I will see to it myself. Later."

"Yes, Herr General."

Colonel Klink spoke up. "How is the Frenchman?"

Schultz started to tell them everything that the doctor had said.

While this was going on, Hogan whispered to Andre, "If LeBeau starts to wake up, tell him in French that he must pretend to be delirious."

Andre nodded and turned to listen to what Schultz was saying. "According to the doctor, he will not be allowed to leave for a while due to the severity of his wounds and the trauma he has gone through."

Everyone's attention turned to LeBeau when he started to moan. Andre quickly moved to his side and said, "LeBeau, le colonel dit d'agir en délire. Nous avons des 'visiteurs' ici." (LeBeau, the colonel says to act delirious. We have some 'visitors' here.)

"What is he saying?" Burkhalter asked suspiciously.

"He is telling LeBeau that it is time to wake up and greet his visitors," Hogan replied.

LeBeau opened his eyes and was surprised to see General Burkhalter, Colonel Klink, and Private Langer in the room. He recalled Hogan's message to him and began to mumble, "Papa, it is good you are here. Mama has just made the most delicious stew I have ever tasted. Won't you join us?

Colonel Klink looked around expecting to see an older Frenchman, but he saw no such person. "What is he talking about?"

"He is still delirious, sir. Can we stay with him? I'd hate to leave him alone like this."

"Absolutely not, Hogan. I'm not about to let you escape. I let you see him for a while, and your time is now up."

"But sir…."

During this exchange, Burkhalter had moved to the cot to see LeBeau up close for himself. LeBeau did something that surprised him. He reached out and grabbed Burkhalter's hands. "What is he doing?!"

"Papa, don't leave me. Please don't leave me, Papa."

Burkhalter freed his hands from LeBeau and listened to Colonel Hogan's explanation. "I told you he's still delirious. He thinks you're his father. He's still really sick! That's why we need to be here…in case something happens."

"Klink, let them stay for a while longer. I would stay, but I have to deal with my great-nephew."

Soon after Burkhalter left, Klink returned to Stalag 13 to ensure that no prisoners had escaped in his absence. Hogan decided that now was the time they would make their move.

"Bye, Schultz!" Hogan ushered Andre and Newkirk out of the room quickly.

"Colonel Hogan, wait!"

"What is it, Schultz?" Hogan asked, peaking his head around the door.

"Where are you going?"

"We're going to the munitions base."

"But Colonel Hogan…"

"Schultz, we'll be back before you can count to a thousand."

"A thousand? Ok. Eins. Zwei. Drei. Vier. Funf. Sechs… Zehn." (1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6…10)

"Ok, men. You know what to do," Hogan whispered. He cleared his throat and began to speak with a thick German accent, "Colonel Zimmermann will be giving us a tour, so that we can inspect the building."

A German stopped them at the gate, "What is your business here?"

"We are the building inspectors."

"Where are your papers?"

"Here." Hogan handed the man the freshly printed orders from the Underground.

"Open the gates!" he shouted to the guard.

The gate opened and Andre drove the car inside. When they got out of the car, a tall man greeted them.

"Colonel Zimmermann, I assume?"

"And you three must be the inspectors. My time is limited, but I can give you a quick tour. Then you can look around all you want."

"Siebundreizig…Neunundreizig." (37…39) Schultz continued to count.

"Schultz, give it up. Hogan was using an American expression. He didn't mean for you to count that high," LeBeau commented from the cot.

"Then what did he mean?"

"He meant that he will be back very soon."

"Are the charges all set?"

Andre and Newkirk nodded and Hogan said in his German accent. "It looks like we're done here."

When they were almost the whole way to the hospital, an explosion shook the ground. "Good work, men. Right on schedule."

"What was that?" Schultz cried out.

"It sounded like an explosion."

"What kind of explosion?"

"A munitions plant blowing up?"

"I know nothing, nothing, nothing!"

Soon, Hogan reappeared at the hospital with Andre and Newkirk. "See Schultz? We weren't gone too long."

"Is everybody here? One, two, three, four, and myself makes five. Ahhh, good."

"And Schultzie, we even brought you this for being such a good boy," Newkirk said pulling out a chocolate bar.

A week later, LeBeau was discharged from the hospital. When he arrived at Stalag 13, he discovered that Colonel Hogan had gotten Klink to give him a welcome home party. Everyone was drinking and having a good time (a lot like when they convinced Klink that the war was over). "Colonel Hogan, where is Newkirk? I haven't seen him."

"Colonel Klink sent him to the cooler for assaulting an officer."

"For how long?"

"30 days. And so far it's only been seven."

"Do you think we can go talk to Klink?"

"Sure, why not?"

"And Colonel Hogan, what happened to that Private who shot me?"

"Private Langer? Well, let's just say we'll never see him again." Hogan pushed LeBeau's wheelchair to where Colonel Klink was standing. "Colonel, LeBeau would like to talk to you."

"Ah, LeBeau. You are looking well."

"Thank you, but I wanted to know if you could release Newkirk."

"Release the Englander? No, I will not. He assaulted a German officer."

"Can I at least bring him something to drink so he can celebrate?"

"Alright." He turned. "Schultz, take LeBeau to the cooler to see Newkirk and to give him a drink."

They're all having a party out there, and I'm stuck in here! Newkirk thought gloomily.

"Newkirk?" LeBeau shouted.

"LeBeau, is that you?"

Schultz opened the door and pushed a wheelchair through.

"I couldn't get the Kommandant to release you, but he did let me bring you something to drink," he said holding the bottle up. Then, he poured it into two cups and gave one to Newkirk through the prison bars.

Newkirk smiled and said, "Thanks ole mate."

"It was nothing, and besides I am the reason you're in here."

"Cheers to me best mate!" Newkirk said raising a toast to LeBeau.

The End

*All of the stuff in French may not be 100% correct and was translated through Google Translate.