Ch 31:

"Skinner," I greet him dispassionately.

"Simonson," he says, standing in surprise. "What are you doing here?"

"Mulder called me. He told me about...the circumstances of what happened."

"Oh." His gaze falls to the floor. Is he...blushing?

"I am of the opinion that there's been a misunderstanding. Give me something, anything to help exonerate you."

He sits, his head in his hands. "I don't know...nothing about this makes sense. I...I don't remember the night the woman was attacked."

He doesn't remember? Does that mean he doesn't remember calling us off? Maybe he didn't realize what he was doing or didn't really mean it. I push such thoughts from my head. This conversation needs to be professional, not personal.

"Have you gotten a tox screen?" I ask.

"No, no need. I've been on...substances before. I know how they would make me feel."

I raise my eyebrows at that but say nothing. He always seemed like a buttoned up goody-two shoes. "When?"

"The war. Vietnam," he clarifies unnecessarily.

"I see. Have you noticed anything of yours go missing – anything out of place? Done anything out of character?"

"You mean other than supposedly hiring a prostitute?" He looks at me with his soulful, deep eyes. And I see the fear and uncertainty in them. "No," he says.

"I think you should see a doctor all the same. Maybe someone is trying to poison you like they did to Mulder."

"Alright. I'll grab my coat."

We catch Mulder on the way out, crossing paths in the empty hallway. "I want to get some labs on Skinner's blood. Since he's been acting out of character, it could be a sign of poisoning."

"It's a good thought. Can you take him to the lab? I want to finish up a few things here first."

"No, Mulder," Walter interjects. "Not her."

He looks between us, searching our faces for an explanation. Seeing none, with a hint of irritation he asks, "Why not?"

Walter shifts uncomfortably. "If there is...someone deliberately setting me up, trying to provoke violence" he steals a glance at me, "I don't think being alone with female agents is wise."

Normally, I would dress Skinner down for that hint of sexism, but I hold my tongue. So, he doesn't want to be alone with me. Fair enough. Let him deal with this on his own.

"Sir, with all due respect, we're limited in resources here. You can trust Simonson to have your back. And to handle herself in a pinch."

"Alright," he answers finally.

Stiffly, I lead the way to my car. I drive in silence. He sighs heavily, and I suspect he's about to address the awkwardness between us.

"The good news is that it seems they don't know about us. Or they probably would have exploited that already."

"That is good news," I answer in a monotone. "Though apparently there is no 'us'." I wait in agonized silence, but he says nothing. "Do you remember the piece of last night, when you called me?"

"Yes. That part I do remember. But I think you can better understand now why we had to stop seeing each other. I can't risk anyone finding out about us. Your life...I feel," he sighs and starts again. "I care too much about you to endanger you in this project."

"There's always risks. I'm an FBI agent, damnit, Skinner! And we are stronger together. We have a better chance of besting them together. Please, Walter, I-" love you, I think. I stop myself before the words leave my lips. "I want to help you fight them," I say instead.

"Well, it might be irrelevant soon enough. I don't know if I'll still have a job tomorrow."

I can't help but reach across the space between us to clasp his hand. "Mulder, Scully, and I will do everything we can to make sure you do."

When we get to the lab, I sit with him, watching the technician to make sure they don't do anything suspicious. When they're done getting his blood and urine, we're alone again, left in the doctor's office.

Unprovoked, Skinner turns to me. "I'm sorry, Laila. I should have been gentler when I told you that we couldn't see each other anymore...I had a feeling that something bad was going to happen, and I didn't want to risk you getting involved. But believe me, us staying apart is for the best. My life is too complicated for us to be serious. You deserve someone who can...care for you openly. Fully. Besides, my professional judgement is too compromised when you're around." He runs one finger across my bottom lip, and I ache to feel his lips on mine.

"Walter," I whisper, my eyes welling with tears. "Please."

"I've made up my mind. It'll be best if we forget we were ever anything other than coworkers."

I bow my head and nod once, blinking to clear my eyes. "Very well. If that's what you want. I can give you a ride back to your place." I'm proud of how there's hardly a quiver in my voice.

"I'll take a cab," he mutters. "Thank you for your help tonight."

"Any time, sir."

I get back to my apartment and sink to the floor. Part of me didn't want to believe it was Skinner on the phone. Didn't want to believe it was true. But now...there's no doubt about it.

Thankfully, I'm not called to testify at Walter's hearing. I would be terrified they would ask me anything hinting that they suspect he and I had a personal relationship. And, under oath, I would not be able to lie. Luckily, with the evidence that Mulder and Scully discovered and the drugs found in Skinner's blood – traced back to the bartender at the bar – Cigarette Smoking Man is foiled again.

A small part of me was holding out hope that once the drugs cleared his system and the heat from this inquiry died down, he would call me up. I told myself I would tell him off or play hard to get, but I knew that wasn't true. I would go running back into his arms. But I don't get a call. So, I try to do what he wants. Pretend that nothing ever happened between us.

I've been dreading this appointment all afternoon. Three weeks have passed since the hearing, and I've given up hope that Walter – no, Skinner – will change his mind. And I still have a job to do.

"It's good to see you back in your office, Sir," I greet him.

"It's good to be back, Simonson." He nods at my colleague Jim as he enters. "So, I hear you two need direction regarding the USDA? Brief me on your findings, and I'll see what I can do."

We walk him through the case. And it's almost like things are normal. Except for the silent breaking of my heart.