AN: So … SURPRISE. Of the few things I thought that wouldn't ever happen, me writing a Criminal Minds fic again was pretty much on top of that list. But I guess my muse found her inspiration with the new season. A part of me feels like I'm actually cheating on Morgan/Garcia, BUT…. a ) he left and b ) how funny were the Garcia/Alvez scenes? Also, Adam Rodriguez, who alone was the reason I endured two seasons of Horatio Caine on CSI Miami (sorry to everyone who liked the show. I'm certain there was something good about it – other than Adam Rodriguez. I just…. didn't find it. Other than Adam….) With the Alvez/Garcia thing I fell like a teenage fangirl all over again...

"So what are you doing tonight, chica? Hanging out with your Canadian boyfriend that totally exists?"

"Okay, he does. Totally exist. And he's not Canadian. And …why does it matter what we are doing. What are you doing Mr. Tall, dark and blandsome?"

"Just kicking it with Roxy"

"Ah, who's that?"

"That's my girl. Yeah, you should meet her some time. You'd love her."

"Does she love you?"

"Yeah, she adores me."

"Tell me to call when she's come to her senses"

(Dialog between Luke Alvez and Penelope Garcia - Season 12 premiere)

Three weeks and it wasn't getting better. I hated him. Somewhat. After Morgan left I swore I'd not get attached to anyone new in the BAU. I obviously couldn't do a 180 on Rossi, JJ, Hotch and Reid. I mean, they had been around me for so long going all professional on them all of a sudden would have been weird. Even for my standards. But that didn't apply to anyone new joining the BAU.

And of course he had to be hot. Somewhere out there someone had a weird sense of humor. And don't get me started on the fact that this case somehow managed to include BDSM- and sex shops. I really was trying to be all professional without my usual remarks and comments and flirting, but seriously….?

Why I had been telling him about a boyfriend I didn't have I am not sure. This wasn't high school where I had to prove anything but… we'll call it a defense mechanism. For now. Leave it to him to see right through my little white lie. That was the problem when working with profilers – they spotted the smallest fib.

A few weeks later

"What has you so tense these days, Garcia?" I heard JJ asking, joining me for lunch on one of the rare days that the team was actually in D.C.

"Alvez. He's just…. uh, driving me insane," I said through gritted teeth and saw JJ and Prentiss laugh next to me. "What?" I asked.

"I remember your first reaction to Morgan when you guys met. He was driving you insane as well…" JJ smiled.

"Oh no no no no. Wrong tree, sweetie. Morgan was… different," I argues, seeing her smirking at me.

"Sure he was…" JJ answered, sounding not very convinced.

"What exactly is Luke doing that is so bad?" Prentiss asked curious.

"He is… personal," I said, seeing the eyebrows of both my friends hit their hairlines.

"In what…way?" JJ asked cautious. "Is he… harassing you?"

"What? No!" I exclaimed, making sure to say it loud enough so anyone actually listening in wouldn't get the wrong idea. The last thing I needed right now was HR or someone up my ass, asking me questions about Luke Alvez and how inappropriate he was behaving.

"He is just…. constantly in my personal space, asking me all these questions about my weekend and my boyfriend. And he keeps telling me about… his weekend and…girlfriend." The moment I said it out loud, I knew how stupid this sounded.

"How exactly is that a bad thing?" Prentiss asked, while JJ's question was "What boyfriend?"

I turned to Prentiss first. "I am trying a more professional approach to things at the office…" I said, seeing her looking at me confused.

"Why? What is wrong with how you have been until now?"

JJ chose that moment to repeat her question. "What boyfriend?"

"The one I made up when he asked me about my weekend when we met during his first few days with the BAU."

"And you made that boyfriend up why exactly?" Prentiss asked.

"I don't know, ok? He just… asked me all these questions about my weekend and what I had been up to. So I told him I spent it with my awesome and hot boyfriend. It was the first answer that came to my mind…"

"That is an odd first thing to come to your mind for such a general question…" Prentiss said.

"Were you trying to make him jealous?" JJ asked amused.

"What? No! Of course not. No jealousy or anything of the likes."

"So what exactly is it that has you so agitated?"

"I don't know. He is just so…. Ugh," I said, feeling like shouting almost.

"You are right," Prentiss all of a sudden said. "So not like Morgan. He didn't make you speechless," she grinned and I wanted to hit her.

"I'm not speechless. I just can't explain what exactly it is about Luke Alvez that has me so tense. Maybe it is that I want to exercise some professionalism."

"Oh please, you couldn't be professional if your life depended on it. And… we wouldn't want you to. With all the gruesome things we see all day thanks to our job, it is good to still have something to laugh about and joke with and feel good about something."

"He told you about his girlfriend?" Prentiss asked confused out of the blue.

"Yeah, he told me about Roxy during one of our short-lived elevator conversations. They seem to be our thing apparently," I said sarcastically.

"So?" JJ asked.

"So what?" I asked back.

"What did he tell you about Roxy?" Prentiss asked.

"Nothing, other than a name and that she adores him and that apparently I would love her – as if."

"Why wouldn't you?" JJ asked amused.

"Seriously? Can't you see that kind of girl he would be dating? Some… wannabe Victoria's Secret model, that probably orders salad and then with dressing on the side. Someone who is on some beach/zone/Atkins-diet thing and complains about carbs… We would probably have nothing in common."

"For someone who is annoyed by Alvez, you seem to think an awful lot about the guy," JJ remarked and Prentiss just nodded, smiling.

"I wouldn't say Roxy needs to be on a diet…" I all of a sudden heard a voice from behind me. A very familiar voice.

I was almost flying out of my chair due to the surprise.

"What the hell?" I said, this time shouting. Way to give a girl a heart attack.

"Well, you wondered about Roxy…" he said nonchalant.

"I didn't wonder about Roxy. I was… simply stating a fact."

"How is it a fact when you don't even know it?" Luke Alvez asked, seeming more amused than anything. "Roxy is my Shiba Inu. My dog – which I got from a shelter a few years back. She might be well fed, but I wouldn't say she needs a diet per se."

Oh my goodness, this was not happening! Of course it had to be a dog. And from the animal shelter. He discovered my white lie in regards of my boyfriend, but apparently I just walked straight into his Roxy-storyline. He could have corrected me back when we had that conversation initially, but no…

"Also, her being a dog might make it a bit complicated calling you when she comes to her senses – as you suggested," he remarked, grinning. This could not get any worse.

"I walked right into this one…" I said, seeing him nod smilingly. "But… I'll take the high road out of this one and just say…. I'll see you in the office, JJ and Prentis."

"This will be very interesting," I only heard his remark to probably no one in particular.

And maybe I should look at transfers. Alaska maybe - if it weren't for the cold.

From now on, I guess it were stairs for me. Leave the elevator to Agent Luke Alvez. Stairs were better anyway. Fitness and the likes. Yeah, that sounded like an awesome plan. Not!

- THE END -

Post AN: My first "Roxy" thought was actually it is his daughter. But the way he smiles when he says she adores him lets me actually believe he is talking about a pet. I'm sort of undecided of whether I'd pair them or whether I'd actually write more on them. They have an interesting chemistry to be honest and make the show fun again.

For the moment I have it marked as Garcia/Oc, since FF . net has not yet a name tag for Luke. I actually sent them an email, asking to add him. The moment that happens, I'll change the OC to L. Alvez…