I'd like to point out that this is a hurt/comfort fic- not a smut fic. If you're looking for a fun, sexy romp, look elsewhere. If you're here for feels with a mature edge- Welcome! You're in the right place.
Fair warning- this chapter is a LOT darker than the last one. I've put the necessary warnings in the summary and done my best to handle these heavy subjects with care and respect- I hope it shows.
Oh, and one more thing! If you get to the end and it feels like there's a scene missing, there absolutely is! No MA fic allowed here, after all. If you're 18+ and shuffle over to my Ao3, however, this story is cross posted there, spicy scenes intact!

Atem didn't really know how to describe Kaiba Seto.

Romantic certainly didn't fit. He was never the type to buy flowers or chocolates- sometimes he'd buy a box of trading cards for Atem as a surprise, but it was more of a desire to duel Atem at the top of his game than a considerate gift- and he'd started doing that before they'd started dating, anyway. Seto always paid for their meals when they went out- but again, it was only the logical thing to do, seeing as Atem worked part-time at the Kame Game Shop and Seto was a multi-billionaire. And of course Seto never opened car doors for Atem- he rarely opened them for himself. He had a chauffeur for that.

(He did help Atem reach the top shelf quite often though, and it was appreciated. The Kaiba Mansion seemed to be built for giants, to Atem and Mokuba's chagrin. The difference between them being that Atem wasn't entirely comfortable with climbing on the counter... at least when Seto was home.)

Sweet felt even more off the mark. Their every interaction was a challenge, a test, a Game. If one saw the other slipping, it was their responsibility to point out that weakness and help the other back to their feet. Their relationship was built on always pushing each other to newer and greater heights, not on soft words and tender embraces. To some, it might have seemed the boyfriends barely got along- but the fact was that the two spoke a metaphoric language all their own. Seto's personal brand of kindness was unique, and that made it all the more valuable to Atem. It felt like dark chocolate tasted- dark, rich, and warm, the slight edge of harshness making it even more exquisite- but not sweet.

Atem didn't mind their connection being personal and private, but he knew telling his friends over and over that no, things were fine between them, he was happy, you just don't get it, was worrying his nakama more and more as time went on.

It wasn't until Jounouchi took a trip to visit his uncle in Brooklyn and offered to teach Atem some American slang when he came back that Atem found a word that fit his relationship with Seto perfectly.

Thirsty.

The first time he'd seen it was maybe an hour after the last time Seto had almost beaten Atem, when Seto had asked "what was your last card, anyway?" and Atem had to admit the truth. Atem had predicted Seto would either find it funny or get angry, but he'd done neither. He'd leaned down to Atem's level, so close he could feel Seto's breath on his face, and whispered, "You do know how to get your way, don't you? Do your friends know how manipulative you really are?"

Atem had almost protested, but then Seto had leaned in even closer and his words had failed him.

"They don't, do they? You hide that side of yourself from them. You don't think they'll like it. But I do. I like… all of you. "

There had never been anything remotely resembling shyness on Seto's part- the first time their lips met, he'd taken Atem's mouth with the ferocity of a starving man, forcing his lips apart with his tongue and fisting his right hand in Atem's hair. His left had found its place in the small of Atem's back, forcing their bodies together.

They'd pulled apart for air, Atem panting, Seto running his lips down Atem's throat, nipping at his collar bone. Atem threw his head back and Seto had pressed forward, hard, and the back of Atem's knees found the edge of Seto's bed and then Atem was on his back and Seto was bent over him, running his tongue over Atem's Adam's apple. Atem had shifted, rising a leg onto the bed and accidentally brushing the area between Seto's legs- Seto gasped, then moved a hand to Atem's thigh, grinding into Atem's flesh. Seto's hand had crept lower, higher on Atem's thigh, and Atem felt his body responding in kind- it was an unfamiliar sensation, but a welcome one. They'd continued on like that for a few minutes- Atem lost his shirt and ended up on his stomach somehow, Seto pressing his fully-clothed body into him and panting…

And then he'd broken contact and stood up, with a simple "That's enough." The only physical signs that remained of their activity moments before were his blush and rumpled clothes- Atem didn't think he'd come, but his erection was completely gone.

Atem hadn't thought much of it. Atem was a virgin and Seto had, in his own words, "never had a romantic encounter before," so it wasn't surprising to him that a first kiss hadn't turned into a first time.

But then it happened again. It started happening often.

It wasn't hard to get Seto aroused at all- all it took were a few choice words or a prolonged touch. After "The Scrabble Incident," Atem began wondering if he and Seto didn't have some sort of shared gaming kink as well, to be honest.

Every time, Seto had acted as if with borderline desperation, forceful and passionate and thirsty.

Every time, he'd stopped it after a few short minutes. He never took off his clothing. He never came.

Atem had never had more than a passing curiosity about sex before, regardless of gender- he'd always been far more interested in mental stimulation then physical sensation, and the deep, ingrained need most everyone seemed to have for sexual gratification simply… didn't exist in him. His body responded in the expected way when he was with his partner- feeling Seto grinding against his bare stomach though his pristine white suit as he pinned Atem's wrists against the wall in his dark office after hours was very, very arousing.

But he didn't really feel like he needed sex, and that didn't particularly bother him.

Seto, on the other hand, very clearly did feel that need and was holding himself back. Each time it happened Atem felt a little more sure of what that peculiar look in his eyes was every time he pulled away. Seto was distressed.

And that bothered Atem a lot.

And so Atem's new plan had started.

Step one was research- Atem put his new KC-brand laptop and Seto's high speed internet to good use during this phase. He had a vague idea what sex between two men entailed, but wasn't entirely sure of the specifics, and that really wouldn't do. His first few forays into the Japanese side of the internet weren't terribly insightful, mostly finding hentai sites and fujoshi forums. In his second attempt, he searched in English- and this led to several sites discussing the expansion of American civil rights to include gay couples. Still not what he was looking for, but one site had a forum as well- and there was where he hit the jackpot.

The users were surprisingly welcoming to him, particularly considering his grasp of the language was shaky at best, and in just a few short days he knew more about safe sex than he felt he strictly needed to (and he'd learned that there was a real, solid chance of same-sex marriage being legalized in parts of America within the next few years, which sent his mind down a new exciting-slash-terrifying direction for his and Seto's future that he shelved for now. One relationship milestone at a time.)

Part two of the plan involved physical preparations- starting with a trip to the mall. This should have been the easiest part. Considering the fact Atem didn't drive, it proved to be the hardest. He'd picked up his phone and dialed Yuugi's number without hitting "call" three separate times before he finally admitted to himself that asking Yuugi to help him by condoms and lube was just not something he was mentally capable of doing. He ran through a list of his other options- Isono and Sugoroku were out for obvious reasons, so that left four options, each with their own pros and cons;

Honda, who would have been the obvious choice if only he had a car and not a motorcycle.

Jounouchi, who was the least likely to have a bad reaction to being asked for a dubious favor but had a less than ideal relationship with Seto.

Otogi, who he liked and got along well with but Atem was fairly certain wouldn't be comfortable discussing sex with him at all, let alone doing this.

And Bakura, who logically would be fine if not for the fact that Atem had the feeling that letting him know this many personal details of his life was a Bad Idea. He wasn't sure where the bad feeling came from, but it was strong enough that he dialed Bakura, shivered, hit "cancel" and called Jounouchi instead.

In the end, Jounouchi had found Atem's "grocery shopping" trip incredibly amusing. The most he'd pried was asking if Atem was sure he was getting the right size (he was,) and had dropped him off at the Game Shop with a single "Let me know how it goes, yeah? All the embarrassing little details!" before driving off. He didn't need to say who he was talking about.

Atem quickly stuffed his bag in his room and jumped in the shower, half tripping down the stairs a few minutes later as he pulled on a jacket and rushed into the shop. He heard Yuugi's voice from the counter as he stumbled through the back room.

"Ten… nine… eight… sev- oh, wow, you made it."

Atem slammed his hands on the counter as he caught his breath. "I'm not late!"

Yuugi laughed. "One would think you'd have less trouble making your shift on time considering you, you know, live here and all."

Atem sighed. "I'm afraid my upbringing didn't exactly do a good job preparing me to enter the workforce."

"Speaking of which- do you think you're going to take the University Qualification Exam this year, or are you going to wait until next year?"

Atem blinked. "I… I'm not sure. I haven't decided yet." He'd completely forgotten about it.

"You haven't? It's coming right up."

"I know."

"It's not a big deal if you wait until next year, you know. You're officially seventeen."

Atem furrowed his brow, looking at Yuugi. "You don't think I can pass it."

"I…" Yuugi looked away. "I think if anyone can pull this off, it's you. But it was only six months ago that you could barely string a sentence together."

It was true- his knowledge of Japanese had been entirely borrowed from Yuugi, and the afterlife didn't have such a thing as language barriers. Aside from some basic vocabulary he still remembered, he'd had to start learning Japanese and English the day he came back to life earlier this year.

" Aibou , you know how hard I've been studying."

"I do! But Atem, that exam is to prove you've had the equivalent of twelve years in the education system. And you'd technically be taking the exam a year early if you took it now. You don't have to rush this. And there's one other thing to consider too- the longer you wait, the less likely it'll be that someone will discover Mutou Atem didn't exist until six months ago."

"I'm sure Seto didn't leave any loose ends."

Yuugi lowered his voice, leaning on the counter in a way that it wasn't suspicious he was hiding his mouth from the storefront window. "Electronically, no, I'm sure he didn't. But the hospital you were born in, the doctor that signed your birth certificate, your preschool, your elementary school, the officials that made your immigration from Egypt to Japan official- all of them are real, and none of them remember you. If someone starts doing interviews and trying to pick apart your story, it won't hold. Kaiba-kun didn't just stop at forging those documents for you, Atem. He hacked into government databases in two countries and added them in. If anyone ever finds out… In a best case scenario, he'll be sent to prison."

Atem lowered his eyes. "I know. I owe him so much…"

Yuugi stood up. "I need to start getting ready for my night class. Just... promise me you'll think about what I said, okay?"

Atem nodded. "I will. I promise."

Yuugi headed into the back room. "Later!"

"Later, Aibou! "

Atem really hoped it didn't seem like he was trying to get rid of Yuugi- but he had something a bit different on his mind. As soon as he heard footsteps on the stairs he fished his phone out of his back pocket and picked Seto out of his contacts.

Want to meet up tonight? Let me know when youre free!

Absolutely.

This meeting just started 8 minutes ago and the representatives from Apple and Microsoft are already screaming at each other.

I need to blow off some steam.

Seto if youre in a meeting youre not free!

Worried about me, Atem?

You don't need to be. I know how to not get caught.

Aren't you at work too?

Please be careful :(

Theres no customers. Im all alone here.

Its lonely. Wish u were here

Cant wait for tonight :)

So needy, Atem! I feel wanted.

And by the way, apostrophes exist. They look like this: '''

I do want you! I do need you!

All of u

Tonight

:3

Atem, don't say that sort of thing if you don't mean it.

I hate being disappointed.

When have I ever disappointed u?

See u tonight 3 3 3

And so Atem's plans were laid. All that remained was to anxiously wait just a few more hours...

Isono arrived five minutes after the Kame Game Shop closed for the evening, almost down to the second. Unfortunately, a small gaggle of children had come in right before closing time- the good news being they'd spent a lot of money between them, but the bad news was that one of them had knocked over and entire display of Pokémon TCG booster packs on her way out, and another had decided to open all ¥2000 of his Duel Monsters booster packs while he waited for his friends to finish and throw the crumpled packages on the floor.

Atem felt horrible making Seto and Isono wait, but if he left for the Kaiba Mansion to spend the night with his boyfriend and didn't clean this mess up first, he had a feeling Sugoroku might ask him to stay there, secret child of his long deceased son or not.

"Atem-dono, would you like some assistance?" Isono offered.

"Wha- I... no. No, this is my job, Isono. Why don't you sit down? I should be done in a few minutes."

Isono shifted. "Atem-dono… Truthfully, I'm supremely uncomfortable watching you crawl around on the floor picking up trash. I would be far less so if I were helping."

Atem looked up. "Alright. You can hunt around for any more Pokemon boosters I missed, I'm sure there's a few, but please leave the garbage to me. Seto doesn't pay you to be a janitor."

Within seconds, Isono had located a handful. "I find you of all people saying that ironic, Atem-dono. Weren't you a prince in the alternate dimension Kaiba-dono took you from?"

Atem laughed. "King, actually. My entire family is probably rolling in their graves."

Isono slipped the boosters back into the display case. "My deepest apologies, Atem-dono. I've overheard you speak of your father both as king and not approving your coming here- I hadn't realized that you had succeeded him."

"It's fine, Isono. You don't need to apologize." Atem threw his last handful into the trash. "That was my old life- and it ended a long time ago. I feel like a completely different person now. Did I miss anything?"

"I don't believe so. I don't mean to impose, but I believe it may be in our best interest to hurry. I should warn you that Kaiba-dono is an a… peculiar mood."

Atem flipped the lights off in the showcase. "I just need to grab my bag out of my room before I go- I'll only be a minute."

"Is there any way you could go without it?"

Atem smiled apologetically over his shoulder. "There really isn't. I'll hurry."

It wasn't the first time Seto had sent one of his staff to pick Atem up for a visit.

But it was the first time he didn't meet them at the door.

"Kaiba-dono said that he'll be waiting for you in his room," Isono told Atem without needing to be asked. Atem adjusted his backpack as he made his way through the winding halls- it was nothing compared to the Puzzle of course, but Atem could see how Yuugi managed to get himself lost in here at least once per visit. Atem had no difficulty navigating to his destination, but the walk was still several minutes long and he felt a wave of anxiety creeping up his spine as he walked.

Isono had said Seto was in a peculiar mood… and from his tone, likely not a positive one. Atem wondered if something had gone wrong at work- but then again, he hadn't said it was a foul mood…

The passing of the always-locked great double oak doors of the mansion's master bedroom- Gozaburo's room- signaled that he was almost to Seto's location. His bedroom was just around the corner.

Atem knocked twice and pushed the door open in response to a muffled "Come in." Seto was sitting on the edge of his bed in his black-and-white leather getup, elbows on his knees and intertwined fingers hiding his mouth. He didn't stand or greet Atem when he entered, but he did look up.

Atem smiled. "Yo," he greeted, dropping his bag on the floor as he made his way to the bed. He was half afraid Seto would try to refuse his touch, but he let Atem tilt his chin upwards, away from his hands, and press their lips together. Seto didn't make any move to deepen it for several seconds, and Atem pulled away. It was probably the most chaste kiss they'd ever had at this point. Atem gently placed his right hand against Seto's cheek.

"Is everything alright?"

"I'm not sure yet. I told you before- don't joke about this sort of thing. Were you… Are you…" Seto visibly swallowed. "Do you actually want to… sleep with me tonight?"

And then the pieces clicked into place. Seto was nervous. Atem had seen him angry, ecstatic, tender, from manic to depressed and most everywhere in between- but he'd never actually seen Seto nervous before.

"Only if you want to as well." Atem pressed their foreheads together. "What I want is to please you tonight, in any manner of your choosing."

"Atem," he breathed, "You don't know… what…"

Seto wrapped his arms around Atem's upper back instead of finishing his thought, pressing his face into the crook of Atem's neck.

"I've never done this before. I never thought there'd be anyone…" Seto relaxed his arms enough to look Atem in the face, and Atem responded by lowering his hands to Seto's hips.

"I want to do this… with you. Only you."

Atem leaned in again, the kiss going deeper this time, their tongues meeting for more than a few seconds. Seto stood, shrugging out of his coat. He pulled Atem's knit jacket off a second later with almost the same amount of ease. The two completely broke contact for an instant as Atem abandoned his shirt and Seto unzipped his fly- he'd thought to remove his extra belts and kneepads from the outfit before Atem had arrived, thankfully. Atem had always secretly wondered how difficult it was for Seto to get out of those tight leather pants/boots- the answer seemed to be "not very," considering the speed at which he stripped down to his socks and boxers. Atem slipped one sneaker off with the other foot before Seto distracted him with another kiss.

Atem ran his hands down Seto's muscular abs and grabbed the hem of Seto's knit turtleneck, but immediately Seto's own redirected them to the buttons of his jeans- which was mildly irritating. Seto's skin tight polyester shirt he'd mostly changed out this one for hugged his every line and curve in such an enticing, almost scandalous way. He'd been craving the sight of the rock-hard abs he'd explored by touch countless times for months!

Atem slipped out of his other shoe and jeans with Seto's help, now wearing nothing but his underwear (and one stubborn sock.) Atem made to pull off Seto's shirt once again-

And Seto took Atem's hands in his own, stopping him. He traced circles on Atem's palms with his thumbs as the realization dawned on Atem that something deeper was going on here.

Something was very wrong.

"Atem…" His voice was shaking. Seto let go of his hands. "Let me."

With one fluid motion, Seto pulled his shirt over his head and discarded it onto the floor. Atem's eyes widened, his mind refusing to accept what he saw.

Scars.

Hundreds of scars. Long, thin lines from where something sharp had lashed his arms and shoulders. Countless circles burned black against his pale skin. Two deep burgundy brown lines encircling his throat- not unlike the pale pink marks that he'd seen in the mirror when Yuugi took his collar off at night, but ten thousand times worse. And the little white crescents scattered across his wrists and stomach- Atem knew what those were. They were fingernail marks .

Seto's eyes were closed. Atem realized that the silence had gone on for an uncomfortably long time, but he was utterly speechless.

Seto laughed joylessly. "Not quite what you expected, am I?"

The spell of silence was broken. "What happened?!"

"Gozaburo." He didn't need to say more, but he did. "He used to beat me. Choke me. Burn me with those damn cigars."

Atem knew what his next words would be before he said them, prayed for Seto to stop there, but no gods heard his prayers. "He raped me more than once."

The way he said it was so nonchalant and casual- as if he'd admitted something akin to stealing a co-worker's lunch or forgetting to let the dog out.

Atem had the pieces to figure this puzzle out in his hands months ago. Maybe he'd simply failed to do so, or maybe his mind had refused to even consider this possibility as a sort of unwanted self-defense. He wasn't sure. He wasn't sure of anything right now.

Seto wasn't even looking his direction- he was admiring the spiderweb collage of light and dark marring his right arm. "Pitiful, isn't it?"

The true meaning of his words struck Atem like a bolt of lightning. This was a test.

There was a right answer: "Seto, I've never pitied you once in my life!"

There was a wrong answer: "Seto, I'm so sorry."

This was an incredibly easy verbal trial by Seto's standards, even if it was the most important one he'd ever challenged Atem with. Of course this was a Game- another point to be won or lost in the endless Match that was their relationship.

There weren't many things more important to Atem than a challenge. But there was one.

Games were supposed to be fun.

"Don't do this, Seto. Please. "

Seto locked eyes with Atem. "What, exactly, am I doing?"

"Testing me. Challenging me. Fighting me."

Seto smirked, his eyes glittering. "And why should I stop? If we throw away our little games, Atem, we'll have nothing left. I'll do you one better- what would you call what you're saying now, if it isn't a challenge?"

"A plea!" Atem was near tears, from frustration if nothing else. "Seto, I'm begging you to stop. What do you want? To prove my loyalty yet again, so you don't have to trust me fully? To crush me, punish me, and push me away- all so you can prove yourself right, no matter the cost? What is your goal here!? "

Seto cocked his head to the side. "The same goal I always have, Atem. To win. "

"This stupid game of isolation has no winner!"

Atem met his gaze- Seto was pleased.

Of course he was. Two sets of ideals, clashing against one another, hearts bared as they shouted at the top of their lungs- this was exactly the sort of challenge Seto loved.

But Atem was done playing games.

"You're absolutely right, Seto. Everything we have is based on these games of ours. I don't even know how to talk to you without them… and that's not good enough for me anymore."

Emotions flashed Across Seto's face in quick succession.

Satisfaction at Atem saying he was right... A win-

Curiosity at Atem's next move-

Uncertainty as he realized Atem wasn't playing anymore-

Atem stepped forward. Seto stepped back-

Fear then- real, genuine fear-

Atem entwined his fingers behind Seto's neck. The taller man was trembling. Atem pulled him down to his level- slowly, gently.

He pressed a kiss to each scar on Seto's throat.

"I love you, Seto. There's no strings attached to that- you don't have to fight for it. You don't have to earn it, or win it. It's just how I feel. I love you. "

There seemed to be no reaction at first- Seto was still, silent and trembling. Then his breath hitched, his balance shifted, and he wrapped his arms around Atem, crying.

In perfect sync, the two sat down on the bed together, still in each other's embrace. Atem ran his hand through Seto's hair and Seto's tears trickled down Atem's chest.

"I'm sorry," Seto finally muttered.

"For what?"

"I'm sorry that I… That I can be so…" His breath hitched again.

"Take your time."

He pulled Atem tighter. "I'm sorry I'm so ugly."

"Don't say that. You're not," Atem scolded.

"Don't patronize me. I know my own strengths and weaknesses- I know I'm not a nice person."

"That's not true. You aren't like anyone else in this world or any other. I don't want you to be. You're you. And you're beautiful."

Seto laughed gently. "Atem… I love you." He kissed Atem, pulling away just far enough to speak. "I… need you."

"You have me- all of me. Just say the word."

"Fuck me."

Seto flopped down next to his panting partner and kissed him.

There were a few serene seconds then, both laying side-by-side, smiling as each saw nothing but the other.

"I love you."

"I love you too."

Then Atem burst out in giggles.

"What a mess!"

"We should probably take a shower, huh?"

Atem gaped. "You aren't going to make the poor maids clean this up, are you?"

"Why not? It's what they're paid to do."

"Do you even know how to do your own laundry?"

"I know that I have billions of yen, Atem. Billions ."

"Alright, get up." Atem climbed out of bed as Seto pouted. "First we take a shower, then I'll show you how to run that fancy industrial washing machine of yours."

Seto rolled his eyes, but got up as demanded. "Why would I ever need to know how to do that?"

"I think you're looking at a prime example of life doesn't always take you where you think it will ."

"Touché." Seto linked his hands with Atem's. "So, this is us now? No more games… just serious discussions… and laundry?"

"We are who we are, Seto. Of course we'll still play our games. But this time… let's have fun doing it."

Seto kissed Atem, just one more time. "Only fun games from now on… I like the sound of that."

~FIN~