:) Don't forget to review it means so much to me! I actually was going to drop it but a reviewer saved it ;)

Dean and Castiel pulled into the car spot out the front of the motel and went inside. Both instantly noticed the blood on the carpet and Sam sitting on the bed wrapping a bandage around his hand.

'Sam? what the hell happened? why are you bleeding?' Dean walked over looking for any other signs of injuries and Cas looked for any type of threat leashing his angel blade form his coat.

'Dean its fine, seriously its a couple of scratches'

he finished tying the bandage and placed his hand down

'Tell me what happened. Why is the mirror smashed?' Deans gaze was on the area above the sink were the mirror used to be.

'I uh, punched it.' this definitely got both Dean and Cas's attention. Castiel noticed the way the young Winchester had the same haunted look when he had Lucifer in his head and very quickly pieced together what happened,

'Sam, that spell, it's not completely gone is it?'

Sam stared deeper into his lap and answered softly 'No, its not'

Dean was confused and angry, what was Sam not telling him? hadn't they had enough secrets?

'Somebody better start talking now.'

Castiel thought it best that he explain what happened as Sam still wouldn't look either of them in the eye.

"The spell the witch cast was doing more than just making you and I furious at Sam, it was also messing with his thoughts and I believe that even though the witch is dead that part of the spell remains. The mirror was smashed due to Sams…. frustrations I'm guessing?"

Sam nodded confirming everything Castiel had just said

Dean shock filled expression looked at Sam who was now fiddling with a thread from his jacket.

'Sam why didn't you tell us any of this?'

'I didn't know, I kinda thought it was just me but then it was getting hard to focus and I ended up smashing the mirror. The pain gave me a bit of silence to work it out'

'Well whatever it is we'll figure it out, but no more smashing mirrors okay? i think you just cost us seven years of bad luck.'

Sam genuinely smiled, he felt a little better telling Dean and Cas. Dean was right they would figure this out.

'Sam I'll heal that'

Sam's head snapped up and looked Castiel in the eye for the first time in awhile. His expression was soft and definitely didn't have any signs of malice in them, but as Cas walked towards him all he could think about was the Castiel in his dreams who cut him mercilessly and healed him just to do it again. In that moment he was sure Cas was about to smite him. He got up and walked near the door.

'I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, please don't ...'

Dean and Cas stood there shocked,

'Sam. I only mean to heal your hand, I am not going to hurt you.' Castiel was definitely worried now, he had seen the fear Sam had of him like he was sure he was going to kill him. Whatever was happening to Sam it was using what Castiel had said before when he'd been under the curse about smiting him.

Dean cautiously moved closer

'Sam its us, your safe'

Sam looked up at Dean, finding comfort in seeing his brother. His thoughts quieted and he realised Dean was right, he was safe, all Cas did was offer to heal his hand.

'I'm sorry. I don't know what happened I just kinda freaked out'

Dean nodded 'Its fine it's not your fault.' Although Sam instantly knew Dean did not think any of this was fine

'My biggest question is how do we fix it? a spell that lives on even after the witch is dead? what the hell are we meant to do against that?'

It was a question no-one had and the answer to and the silence that followed felt heavier.

Dean and Cas kept an especially close eye on Sam, and Sam eventually reached breaking point when Dean; who was watching Sam very intently from the corner of his eye, accidentally dropped the gun he was cleaning.

'Dude seriously enough with the mother-henning. You can't even clean a gun your so focused on watching me, that goes for you too Cas. '

Dean might've been caught but he was quick to defend himself

'Ok guilty, but Sam you've been barely talking.'

' Your unsteady on your feet and you acting freaked out around us. Sorry if I'm a bit worried!'

Sam knew Dean had a point but that didn't mean he needed to be monitored 24/7

'I get that I do, but you gotta let me have some space.'

Dean caved and eventually grumbled out a 'fine' but in truth he was just going to be more careful that Sam didn't notice him watching.

Sam was just trying to focus on important thoughts instead of the ones that filled him with dread and guilt. He had actually convinced Cas and Dean to pick up a case on the condition that they would also focus just as hard to come up with a way to break the curse. Unfortunately for him it was a werewolf case and all he could think about how he'd been forced to kill Madison; a girl who didn't even know she was a werewolf and how he'd pulled the trigger. Of course they know knew that it was possible to live a normal life as a werewolf, who knows maybe she could've lived with Garth and his makeshift family or found another friendly pack. One thing is for sure, she didn't have to die. Add her to the list of people who should be alive had they not come into contact with one Sam Winchester.

Madison

Jessica

Mary

Kevin

Charlie

Bobby

Ellen

Jo

so many more came to mind but he pushed them away, mostly he'd made peace with their deaths. He mourned them and never forgot the sacrifices they had made but he had learned to move on. That is until now where the guilt felt like it could eat him alive, things he should of known or prevented and now those he loved are dead because of it.