Part Three

Giles didn't come back like Buffy hoped, but he did send for Willow to go stay with him in England for a bit; to retrain her in mystical ethics or whatever. It took a lot of convincing, but she eventually went on the understanding that getting better was the only way she and Tara ever had a chance of getting back together.

To say Buffy was relieved at the result was an understatement. The atmosphere in her house had already improved tenfold. Plus, it made what she was about to do so much easier. Less chance of being ganged up on…

"Buffster! What brings you by?" The smile froze on Xander's face as his eyes widened. "There's not another apocalypse, is there?"

She tried to give him her best reassuring smile, but she wasn't all that invested in it. "Not the end of the world per se, but it might feel like it when you've heard me out."

Xander patted the space on the bench beside him. He'd only half finished sanding it. "I'm all ears. Consider me your multi-eared local carpenter."

Buffy took a deep breath and jumped right in. "Dawn said that Tara overheard Anya and you plotting to try and set me up with someone."

Xander's jaw slacked and he looked around. "Look, Buffy, I know it's been a while, but he's a really nice guy. I'll introduce you."

"No."

He waggled a finger at her. "I'm missing something here, aren't I?"

Another deep breath. Three. Two… And exhale. This was it. "I've been sleeping with Spike."

Xander took a long hard blink. "You… huh?"

It would be okay. Enough time had passed, and she had begun to heal. She could do this.

Buffy hoped her inner pep talk was right. She had a feeling that, either way, it was already too late to back out. Stood right beside Spike's crypt door, she had a fair idea he'd sensed her presence.

So she knocked.

And she waited.

And she knocked again, frowning. Surely he wasn't ignoring her? Not that she'd blame him.

"Spike?"

Her feet were getting itchy. If this was the suspense that came with being considerate, she might just go back to barging in and switch to apologizing after the fact instead. That would be enough of a change, right?

"Spike?" Buffy called again, hating the desperation in her voice. She couldn't risk letting the doubts creep in. They almost killed her last time.

Reaching for the handle, she held back at the last moment.

As much as it might kill her to go back to the uncertain place with Spike, it wasn't fair for her to take him to the other place. The bad place. The – ugh! I can't do this.

"Buffy?"

Just as she was about to turn and walk away, a voice came out of the bushes off to her left. She turned to face it.

"Clem?"

The Slayer's eyes focused on him as he emerged into the clearing before her. Those eyes then moved along to who was with him, and then down to the damp earth.

"Buffy!" Clem said again. "Hey, good to see you! How ya been?"

"Uh, good," she replied, cringing at her favorite shoes. They were covered in dirt again. "I'm better," she added, forcing herself to look up. Rallying her bravery some more, she gave Spike what she hoped was a significant look on the word 'better.'

The tentative smile on his face made her cheeks burn, and she hurried on with the conversation.

"So, uh, my birthday," she said.

"Next week, init," said Spike, surprising her.

"Yeah," she affirmed. "You, umm, wanna come?" Quickly, before he had time to answer or she had time to run away, she added, "As my date?"

Spike was silent – his face awash with warring emotions. Clem looked back and forth between him and Buffy, which reminded her that he existed.

"You too," she said. "I mean, you should come too. As a… uh, non-date." God, was there a mystical heatwave coming in over town again? Buffy fidgeted in her jacket.

"Cool," said Clem, giving her a thumbs up, before looking back at Spike. "Hey," he nudged him in the ribs. "Ain't that cool?"

"Cool, yeah," Spike agreed, as if on autopilot. His eyes hadn't left Buffy's. After another moment, they unfogged and he told her, "Thanks."

That one word shouldn't have had such an impact, but the way he said it, she almost swooned.

She could do this. It was all gonna be okay.

The End.

(For real this time.)