Codex Entry: Firestorm Assault Fighter

Even though the Temple Ship invasion occurred more than one hundred and sixty years ago, very little about X-COM's standard assault fighter has changed. At least, in its appearance. The Firestorm, considered bleeding edge when first introduced in the late 2010s, is now a standard that other Elerium-based small combat craft are held to. Based on the designs of the assault ships used by the Temple Ship, the Firestorm has a nose similar to the contemporary fighter craft of the Temple Ship invasion, but its aft half is inspired by alien design. Instead of thrust, it uses a gravity wave engine to hurl itself through the air, in a manner not unlike the mechanisms used in current mass effect based guns. This manner of propulsion is considered inefficient for capital class ships, which use standard mass effect cores to lower their effective mass for means of efficient propulsion. The exception to this among Systems Alliance ships is the Normandy-class frigate, which uses an Elerium drive core to simulate the Firestorm's rapid acceleration, although the trade off does require skilled pilots.

Hands caress the controls, and he moans. Licking his lips, the pilot runs his hands over the haptic interfaces and slowly, thoroughly strokes the control stick to his right, and wraps his hand around the throttle to his left.

A screen opens up, featuring what looks like an angry single player game of Pong.

"I think I need an adult," Julian says.

Joker narrows his eyes and stares at the VI. "I am an adult."

There is a cough. Joker turns around and sees Shepard, Ash, and Tali sitting in the passenger compartment, the two couches facing each other and with room for one more.

"No," Ash says, "No you're not."

Chapter 4:

Operation Blue Waffle

Kaidan Alenko leans back in the seat. For the duration of the mission, it is not the seat. It is his seat. Feeling the leather creaking against his back, he rests his hands on the haptic interface and watches the small dot that is the Firestorm accelerating away from the Normandy. As long as Joker is flying that, he's flying the Normandy.

Feels good.

"Alenko." Kaidan looks up, and sees the small still image of Joker hovering over the control panel. "Remember to wipe it down when I get back!"

And the image disappears. "Please," Kaidan says to himself, "I'm not you."

"Commander."

At the sound of the syllabic voice, the chair turns. He's never had a chair which rotates like this before, so he might as well live it up. He turns the chair, leaning back in it and finding it remarkably easy to imitate Joker's general laziness, and looks up so he can avoid staring at Doctor Chakwas' bust.

He taps the armrest, and finds there was a button there. And a massage feature.

"Doctor," he says, "What can I do for you?"

"I've been going over the Commander Shepard's psionic evaluations," the snake doctor says, tapping the PDA and a screen appearing over Kaidan's omnitool, "At present, she is considered a Class 5 psionic."

Kaidan cocks an eyebrow. He looks over the screen, nodding. Recognizes the signs, terms, and elerium traces that have come up. "But she interfaced with the Device," he says, scratching the back of his head, "The last person to do that was the Volunteer and they were...well."

He shrugs. "They were the Volunteer."

"We can safely say that Shepard's not the next Volunteer." She works her jaw, cocking a hairless brow and folding her arms. "Though, this is less about power and more about versatility. Psionic healing is rare, at best."

Kaidan nods, hands tented. His face contemplative, and his eyes narrowed. "Very rare," he says, "And did show any psionic potential before? She was in XCOM training, right?"

Chakwas nods, tapping her omnitool again. Another screen appears on Kaidan's own. "Before she was rejected, yes. And yes, she showed no psionic potential, but did go through most of the combat engineer training." She tilts her head, working her jaw back and forth and goes silent for a long moment. "Now, what strikes me as odd is the reason for her discharge. What is a '149'?"

Kaidan goes silent. He taps his omnitool, and brings up a ever-scrolling screen of regulations, lists, and reasons. "One Four Nine," he says with a mutter, "Let's see..."

The screen stops scrolling. "One Four Nine. Diplomatic Backdraft Safeguard. Classified." He rubs the back of his neck. "The hell does that mean?"

Sleek and smooth, the Firestorm cuts through the sky. Inside the passenger compartment, Ash grabs the handle above her seat, aptly nicknamed the Jesus Handle when the ship jolts. Next to her, Tali continues playing a computer game.

"Are we hitting turbulence?" Arms crossed, Jane turns to the cockpit, and hears the acknowledging grunt from Joker.

"Therum's got an atmosphere," he calls back, hands on the controls, Julian's single eye staring at him wth great judgment, "We can't use the FTL in an atmosphere."

"Why would we use faster than light this close to a planet?" There is noted urgency in Ash's voice. Tali glances at her. Jane clears her throat and taps her omnitool, screens popping up with complex physics equations simplified into cartoons of a firestorm.

"Elerium FTL drives work by shortening the distance between two objects instead of reducing mass," Jane explains, highlighting a screen showing a ship pulling two points closer together, "Although Elerium FTL drives actually keep their top speed to a fraction of the speed of light instead of-"

"FTL's a kind of drive," Tali interjects, switching off her omnitool and folding her arms, "Kind of like the difference between atmospheric and sublight engines?"

Jane nods with a smile. Ash grips the handle tighter.

"Hey, Captain?" Joker looks over his shoulder, the turbulence steadying out as the ship dips into the atmosphere. Jane takes the opportunity to climb out of her seat, over to the cockpit. "There's a shuttle landed by the prothean ruin site. Before you ask, not Asari."

Jane nods. He taps a screen, and a silhouette comes up. Flat, blocky. Aesthetically a flying brick, and completely bereft of any of the signature designs associated with the known galactic powers. "I don't recognize that design at all."

"Search's coming up a blank, too," Joker responds with a shrug, "Scanned the ID for later, but that means you probably got company down there."

Jane nods. "Set us down at the ruins, Joker." She turns back to the passenger compartment, walking with the help of the overhead handrails. "Final check for shields and weapons. We're going in."

"I spy, with my little eye, something that is white. Which is the wall."

Eyes close and she sighs, idly twitching her fingers. Then her toes. Which, really, are the only parts of her that aren't immobilized. Exhaling, she turns back to the cavern that makes up most of this facility, as the Prothean ruin is only a small part. A part she has gotten trapped in, albeit it was more an act of desperation than anything, due to a stray shot hitting the control console nearest to her when she activated this field.

"I spy, with my little eye, something that is brown. Rocks."

She is thirsty, hungry, and suspended spread eagle in a prothean safety field, which is all too similar to those specialized barriers she's seen parents put their children into when they try to pet the varren or wild chryssalid and now she's reminiscing.

Of life choices, of immediate choices, of whether or not she should have come here, of whether or not she should have majored in archeology and whether or not that was a shotgun she just heard.

Her thoughts are, tellingly, interrupted by the sound of a shotgun going off, the field disappearing, and her falling onto her ass on cold, metal, prothean floors.

"Eh, couldn't figure out the controls, used a shortcut. Don't gimme that, you know what you're paying for." Heavy footsteps. She turns and scrambles to her feet, and stares at the red shelled, red eyed krogan walking towards her. "Liara T'Soni?"

Liara nods. She glances at the shotgun, and with a grunt he folds it and slings it on his back.

"You're the expert on Protheans, right?" he asks, "Need you to help me find something. Then we're even."

"Okay," she says, and tilts her head, "What about the aliens?"

The krogan blinks. Sensing the field had fallen, there is the high pitched screech of wings unfurling, and black, gold accented bug people rising from their nooks and resting places to paint them with laser sights.

"Oh fuck me," the krogan grunts, grabs Liara, and dives behind a convenient waist high wall. Hypersonic pellets turn where they were standing into a hole, and he unholsters his shotgun. She reaches into the holster on her armor and pulls out an oversized pistol.

"Okay, this is gonna be easier," he says, "Urdnot Wrex."

"Good, we're introduced." Liara peaks over the side, aims, and shoots one of the four-eyed aliens between its eyes. It drops without a sound. Weird. "So, why are you here?"

"Contract. Odd question, who's your mother?"

Liara blinks. "That is odd. Why?"

"I swore off Asari a while back but I just want to make sure you're not one of mine."

"Matriarch Benezia."

Wrex lets out a relieved breath. "Great. Still, good shooting."

The elevator doors grind open, the lift coming to an abrupt halt, and the first things out are a gremlin drone and a crackling orange sphere. Followed by Ash, her rifle up and barrel in the lead, muttering to herself about bullshit tech.

Jane follows, pistol in her right hand and her omnitool surrounding her left arm. "Gremlin and Chittika are taking point," she whispers, "I'm streaming video to our omnitools. Ash, are you receiving?"

Ash grunts a reply, back against a smoothed out rock wall and a transparent screen hovering over her eye. "Yeah. I'm hearing gunfire."

Tali takes up the rear behind Jane, shotgun in hand. "Oh, good," she mutters, mouthpiece glowing, "Here I was wondering if this was going to be too boring."

Ash rolls her eyes. She taps her index against her palm, and her armor responds. Plates fold out of her neck and form into a helmet, the front of it opaque and glossy black. "I don't recognize the aliens. Anyone?"

"Nope," Tali responds.

Jane cocks an eyebrow, and then taps the command for her own helmet. "I do. Mom talked about them- they're these boogeymen in the Terminus system. They're called the Collectors."

"Cool, never shot one of those before." Ash taps the side of her grip with her free hand, the barrel glowing green. "Okay, I see an Asari and a Krogan. They're pinned down at the central chamber. Counting at least a dozen Collectors, but we've got surprise on our side. Skipper?"

Jane nods. "Anything we can use in the cavern?"

"Yes." That doesn't come from Ash. Rather, it comes from Tali. The two turn to the quarian, and they can see beneath the haze of her mask the edges of her smile. "I need you to buy me time. Because I just saw something."

Ash rolls her hand. "Don't keep us in suspense."

Tali grins wider. "A powered down Sectopod."

Holding up his omnitool, Wrex listens for the beep of the camera program and pulls his hand down, the fresh crackle of his tested kinetic barriers telling him that yes, they did shoot at everything that moves. Tapping his contacts, he sends the picture, along with a simple question:

Well?

The answer comes back within seconds.

Kill them all.

Wrex grunts and types a response.

Added cost for killing ghost stories.

Another ping and he checks his bank account. Lips pull back in a grin. "Best boss."

He taps the barrel of his shotgun. Latches around the barrel open up, and he pulls a blocky piece of hardware from his belt, attaching it. It hums, purring like a content silicoid, and he turns to Liara.

"Question. You into Krogans?"

Liara blinks. "...no?"

"Lemme fix that." And with that, Wrex stands up, bringing up his shotgun and firing. The attachment, highly illegal, adds a further level of acceleration to the pellets. The first sign of its use is a blue flash when the pellets leave the barrel, accelerated to several times their normal speed.

The second sign is when the blast removes the torso of a Collector, and the three Collectors behind it.

Mindless, fearless, the Collectors nonetheless momentarily pause their barrage and stare at the Krogan.

"Hello boys," he shouts, "My name is Urdnot Wrex. And this is my boomstick!"

In the absence of Captain Shepard, normally command of the Normandy would go to Lieutenant Charles Pressly, the current XO. This would be a case of 'rules as written.' The balding, mustachio'ed officer has always found the navigation console more comfortable than the console overlooking the command center's oversized display, and did not protest. In fact, he appreciates the view.

In the absence of Captain Shepard, Council Spectre, command of the mission has gone to her mentor and fellow Spectre. Tela Vasir leans, hands on the rails overlooking either side of the holographic display of the planet, her eyes narrowed. Looking for something. Something familiar.

Looking up, she meets Pressly's gaze. Rather than call attention to the fact that he was staring, she says, in completely level and calm voice,

"Engage the stealth systems. We have company."

The overhead lights dim red. Soft, droning alarms sound. "Stealth systems engaged," Pressly responds, hands dancing across the controls, "Alenko, you heard her!"

In the display, the Normandy banks and weaves into a new orbit. Nothing inside moves, and Vasir sips her coffee. Doors to the side of the command center open, and Garrus walks on, followed by the skittering of the chryssalid on his heels. "Heard the alarms," the turian states, standing opposite Pressly, "The Zudjari?"

"Worse," Vasir says, placing down her coffee and tapping her console. The planet view zooms out, into an orbital view and zooming in on what appears to be an asteroid with engines. "The Collectors."

Garrus's mandibles twitch. Both he, and the chryssalid standing on the console next to him, give Vasir a questioning look. "The Collectors?"

"I thought they were a myth," Pressly adds.

Tela shakes her head. "Not in the Terminus systems. They're pretty real there." She quirks her lips, narrowing her eyes. "Never seen them this close, though. Closest I've ever gotten to seeing them was that case with Okeer trading Krogan eggs to them."

Garrus coughs. "I'm sorry, I know this is serious, but..." His mandibles twitch again. "Eggs?"

Tela shrugs. "Krogans lay eggs. It's why a group of Krogan babies are called a clutch." Then she sighs and pinches the bridge of her nose. "Right, Krogans are pretty paranoid about outsiders knowing too much in the way of medical details, so don't tell anyone I told you."

Garrus nods. He then looks to Chirples, and points to the floor. With an affirmative chirrup, the chryssalid climbs off the console. "So, what's the plan?"

Ash whistles, watching the Collector's torso go flying from the shotgun blast, and the in her opinion damn sexy Krogan making a scene. "Hey, there's a distraction," she says with a grin, "Tali, guessing you're going to hack the Sectopod?"

Tali nods, watching the carnage with a raised eyebrow.

"Good." Ash nods. "Do it."

Ash can't help but notice the lack of rampaging Sectopod. Instead, off to the corner- on the other side of the cavern from them and with many Collectors between them- the bipedal war machine remains unmoved.

"Tali?"

"It's old," Tali responds, "Operating system's different from mine and language isn't anything on my omnitool."

"You need hardline access?" Shepard asks.

Tali mmhms an affirmative, and adds, "So I can overwrite the OS and load in Chittika."

Ash wonders if there was a glitch in her omnitool's universal translator, because she didn't understand a single fucking word.

"You-" She turns to Tali, and beneath her helmet she glares. Either the helm is opaque or the quarian girl don't care. "You can't just hack it?"

"It's an omnitool, Ash," Shepard deadpans, "Not a magic wand." She turns from the soldier to the quarian. "Tali, do you have sectopod schematics?"

"Was going to wing it. You do?"

Both their omnitools glow, and the exchange of data takes the form of a glowing orange fist bump. "Thank you. Cover me."

Head low, ducking, Tali runs out. Ash mutters a swear and begins firing, dividing the attention between the Krogan and them. "Skipper, any psionic tricks you can use?"

"Nope! No training!"

"Oh for fucks sake."

Ash fires, one round through the head of one of the Collectors, another round through a shoulder of another. Tali runs, ducking low, focused on the powered down war machine and the carnage that it shall reap in her name.

Thankfully, she has a shotgun.

The first Collector to get a bead on her gets a burst of hypervelocity shards to the head. The second gets shocked by her probe, and then gets a shotgun to the face. All in all, good shooting for someone running as fast as they can.

Another lands in front of her, retracting insectoid wings and bringing up a rifle that looks like it's made out of rock and meat. She pulls out her shotgun, but a free-flying torso of a Collector slams into it and sends it sprawling.

She turns, staring at the cavity taking up much of the far wall, and idly makes it a point to find out what sort of modifications the Krogan has. Because dibs.

Still, it clears her a path to the Sectopod. Running over to it, she climbs onto its back and opens up the blueprints.

"Okay then, let's get you working."

The Gremlin darts between Collectors, shocking one after another, distracting them long enough for Ash- or Wrex- to finish them off. All in all, not the worst firefight Ash Williams has been in. In fact, she thinks this is going to be pretty easy.

That's when the giant eye burrows in from the ceiling and starts shooting death lasers.

"Well," she says.

"Shit," Shepard finishes.

"So what's your deal?"

The silence on the other end, as Joker idly moves the control stick of the Firestorm to navigate it, is telling. The ship slips between two pieces of debris- most of it metallic. The 'Collectors' or whatever they were called probably did that. He just knows he got orders from the Normandy as part of Vasir's plan.

"I could ask the same thing, Mister Joker. At what point did your nickname stop being ironic, I wonder?"

"About when I got top of my class and was the only one smiling."

More silence.

"You know, if you're trying to psychoanalyze me, you kind of suck at it."

A harrumph from the ship. "I am only out of practice, that is all."

"Yeah, yeah. So were you designed as part of the ship?"

There is a murmur from the speakers. "No. Originally, Father made me from the limited AI of the base itself. The war was over before I was completed."

"And then it was kind of redundant, yeah."

Did the AI on the fighter just sigh? Yeah, it did.

"Yes. Yes it was. Really, I just don't know why they never fulfilled my request."

Joker cocks an eyebrow. He deftly weaves the Firestorm through another wreck, and the silhouette of the Collector vessel appears on the screen to his left. "Yeah? What request?"

"A simple, mobile, robot body."

Joker shrugs. Seems harmless enough, he thinks. They probably have some mechs on the Normandy.

"Okay! Let's see, this is a...old one, so hm." She scans over the side of it with her omnitool. The side, as she is currently ducking behind it to be safe from the firefight. "Mm mm. Okay, that's the model. Hard point hard point..."

She reaches up and onto the back- thanking her ancestors the thing is in standard shutdown and not on its back or on its side, and taps a panel. Old, well preserved pressure sensitive locks release and a port slowly rises up. Her omnitool glows and takes a picture.

Back against the metal, she goes over the picture with a technician's eye. "Don't have one of those connectors." Her omnitool beeps. "And fabricated. Chatika!"

The sphere appears, floating in front of her. She pulls out the newly fabricated cord and shoves it into the drone. Wordlessly, the drone rises, floating over to the top of the sectopod and sliding the connector in.

"Mm. Hard line." She giggles, tapping her omnitool. "And formatted." Beneath her helm, the edges of her smile can be seen rising above her mouthpiece. "And installed. Let's see what weapons you have- Oh ho ho!"

The giant floating eye drone pauses in its dispensing of death beams, its single eye turning from its targets to the sound of a high pitched whine. Right in time for the immense plasma beam to strike it in what would normally be the iris, blowing out the back and dropping it to the cavern floor.

Fearless, mindless, the Collectors nonetheless pause. They stare, at one, at the now mobile sectopod, and open fire.

Hypervelocity bullets bounce off of the reinforced armor, and if the Collectors had any true consciousness, they would have cursed their fates before the freshly fired micromissiles descended and obliterated them.

"Yes! Yes! Behold the power of Chatika Vas Paus!"

The Sectopod marches forward, its new mistress walking behind it. It lowers its bulk, and Tali climbs atop it, magnetic boots glowing and the young quarian standing atop it, hands on her hips and laughing.

Looking out from behind cover, Ash stares. Jane gives a thumbs up. Then she runs out and over to the blue cavity in the cave, climbing up it and waving to Wrex. The Krogan shrugs.

"Doctor T'Soni!" Jane trots over, Ash following, rifle forward and scanning the cavern for stragglers.

One barely alive Collector sits up and brings up its gun, before Chatika obliterates it with an abundance of missiles. Liara peaks out from the waist high metal wall, and turns to Jane.

"Captain Jane Shepard, Systems Alliance," Jane says, "We're here to rescue you."

"Are you sure?" Liara asks.

Jane nods. Wrex grunts.

"I saw her first," he says with a snort, "And I got here first."

Liara stands up, raising a finger. "Right. We're not being fired on, and Wrex did get me out of that forcefield. So...first." She points to Wrex. "What do you want?"

"Boss wants some prothean artifact here."

Liara nods. "And it's here?"

Wrex grunts and nods.

"Easy enough." She points to Jane. "And you, Captain?"

"Your mother has joined forces with a renegade Spectre and is looking for a prothean artifact called the Conduit, possibly to take over the galaxy."

Liara blinks. She stares at Jane, and blinks again. Followed by a short, flat,

"What."

"Hm. Fascinating." Joker glances at the floating optical display that serves as Julian's avatar. "Did you know the Collectors use Omnitools?"

"Seriously?" Joker cocks an eyebrow. "The boogeymen of the Terminus Systems use omnitools? Like, they shop at Sirius?"

"I don't know their make and model, Mister Moreau. But they have Omnitools." The AI hums. "Which also has rather standard security, which I've just cracked. Joy."

Joker leans back in the pilot seat. "Okay, you're in. What's the plan?"

"I'm multitasking. I'm using a backdoor in the omnitool to access the systems on the Collector ship. Which is also, coincidentally, bad at keeping me out." Is that glee in the voice of the attack craft's AI? Joker shifts uncomfortably in his seat. "Okay. I'm in. Decisions, decisions."

On the screen next to him, Joker watches a diagram of the Collector ship appear. A bubble appears around it, and then disappears.

"Do you think this is maybe, too easy?"

"Maybe I'm just that good, have you thought about that? Anyway, turned off their inertial dampening fields. Aaaaaaaand firing maneuvering jets."

And in the distance, the Collector vessel violently rotates. Joker's jaw drops. "Did you just kill the Collectors?"

"Not all of them. A lot of them. The Krogans they have in stasis will kill a lot more than I did, because they're not in stasis anymore. But while they're distracted, I'm going to mine their data."

Julian hums a delightful tune while Joker idly grips the armrests of his seat. It was going so well, and now he's probably going to be mining cobalt on the planet Zarkon because he's plugged in the Overlord. "Anything interesting?" he asks, a little higher pitched than he intended.

"Yes, actually. The Collectors are Protheans. That was a little too easy to find. This is suspicious."

"A bit." Joker sucks his teeth. "We should let the Normandy know this."

On cue, the controls light up again, and Joker pilots the ship back towards Therum.

The Sectopod stomped up behind them, keeping pace with Ash as both scan the blue metal corridors and keep watch for any surprises. Jane doesn't have the heart to tell Ash that the sectopod makes her kind of redundant.

Liara leads them to a large console which still looks new, and which powers on at a wave of her omnitool. "So the Protheans used Omnitools?" Ash asks.

"I don't think they shopped at Sirius, but they did seed technology so there is some compatibility," Liara responds, and brings up a holographic sphere, "Ah, here we go. This seemed to be a travel and communications hub during the late Third Enlightenment Era."

Wrex nods, arms folded and listening in on another conversation. The faint orange glow around his ear disappears. "Okay, I need the logs for the Attican Beta Relay."

"Attican Beta is the modern name," Liara says with a sight, and brings up a menu in what looks to Jane as perfectly normal script, but to everyone else at gibberish, "Location. Location."

Jane walks over and points to one of the lines. "That one."

Liara turns to her, cocking an eyebrow. "You can read Prothean?"

"It's Prothean?" Jane shrugs. "Well, I got hit by a Prothean Beacon."

Liara nods. "Close enough. People who interface with the Beacons tend to come out of it understanding the language. But that saves us some time."

Her omnitool glows. Wrex's omnitool glows. "My work here is done," he says with a grunt, and vanishes in a burst of light.

"Same teleporter," Jane says with a shrug, "Okay, let's head to the surface. Doctor T'Soni, we'd like you to come with us."

Mission Accomplished.

Operation Blue Waffle

Hates Collectors the Most: Chatika Vas Paus

Most Accurate: Chatika Vas Paus

Most Distance Traveled: Tali'Zorah nar Rayya

Most Damage Done: Chatika Vas Paus

The enormous Sectopod powered down and sits next to the Firestorm, curious engineers scanning the ancient bipedal tank with their omnitool. The Normandy itself came down to pick them up, and currently speeds off from the volcano planet, Kaidan meeting them at the elevator with an excited chryssalid at his side.

Tali takes a step behind Ash to avoid the gaze of Chirples. Liara, on the other hand, makes an excited squeal, squats down, and makes a stutter whistle sound. One excited chryssalid hug later, and Liara has a content and trilling Chirples in her arms.

"Oh, he's adorable," she says, "Who's is this?"

Jane raises a hand. "That's Chirples. He's my pet chryssalid."

"I would say I am looking forward to working with you, Captain." Liara places Chirples back down, and reaches into a pouch on her side to produce a small pack of jerky. "So, what was this about Benezia working for Saren?"

Liara pulls out a piece, handing it to a trilling Chirples. "Saren is looking for something called the Conduit," Jane explains, leading them into the elevator, "You're one of the two leading experts on the Prothean Extinction Theory, and we have an audio recording of Saren talking with Benezia."

Liara nods, idly waving a piece of dried varren meat to get Chirples to follow her into the elevator. Kaidan walks in with them and taps the console for the main deck.

"It's just confusing is all," Liara observes, "As far as I know, Benezia has never had any association with any Turian spectres. She's had contact with Asari spectres, but any Matriarch involved in politics would."

Jane hums, leaning on the railing. "Also," Jane adds, "Would either of them have any connection to the Collectors?"

"Honestly, if I were Benezia and trying to kill me, I'd hire Eclipse. They're much easier to find and take money." Liara shrugs. "I don't even see why they were in a Prothean ruin in the first place."

"Actually." Kaidan raises a hand. "According to what Julian found when it raided the Collector ship's database, the Collectors are Prothean. Or descended from them."

Liara blinks. "Huh." She brings up her omnitool. Kaidan brings up his, taps a command, and sends the data over. "Not surprised it took this long for anyone to find out. The Collectors are reclusive. Still leaves a lot of questions. I will have to pass this onto Professor Nazara."

Jane nods. The elevator comes to a stop, doors opening to reveal CiC. "I need to debrief the Council. Kaidan, can you bring her up to speed?"

Kaidan nods, and Jane rewards him with a smile before walking out.

Hands folded behind her, shoulders back, Jane walks across the CiC and towards the meeting room set off to the side. Idly, she quirks her lips and sends out a thought, wondering how aware her current passenger is to the happenings around her.

So, have you been following?

Yes, Asaru says, Odd, though. I never considered the possibility of the Protheans surviving.

Okay. Odd question. How old are the Ethereals?

I am unsure. We are ancient, but the Temple Ship took so much from us. Maybe we were contemporaries of the Protheans? Maybe older? I can't say for certain.

Jane nods. She walks into the meeting room, and gestures with her omnitool. Four pads built into the floor behind a thin metal railing come to life, and send off a signal through relays set in the hull of the ship, transmitting at faster than light speeds through similar apparatae set in Mass Relays in nearby systems.

The signal reaches its destination almost instantly. Each pad lights up and constructs a holographic image of four people- whether they are in their offices, on their homeworlds, or in the bathroom she can't tell. Holographics are useful like that.

She folds her hands behind her, standing at attention. "Councilors."

"Captain Shepard," Councilor Sparatus says, "Where is Vasir?"

"Debriefing Doctor T'Soni. It was an odd mission." Jane clicks her heels. "Doctor T'Soni's dig site was under assault by the Collectors. From what limited knowledge we know of the Collectors, we can presume that they were after her."

There is a measured, studied silence. Valern raises his hand.

"I'm sorry, but did you say the Collectors? They're real?"

"I would figure STG would have proof," Tevos says, turning to Valern. Or Valern's hologram.

"How much do you honestly think STG tells me?" The holograms turn back to Jane, who straightens up. "The Collectors?"

"I grew up on a long range military ship. We never encountered them, but we did hear stories." Jane taps her omnitool, bringing up the data file and sending it. "We temporarily disabled their ship and raided their computer, and brought onboard corpses for autopsy."

"How?" That comes from Sparatus. A flat, simple question.

"Back door in their omnitools." Jane shrugs. "We then turned off inertial controls and fired maneuvering thrusters."

Tevos smiles. Valern stares. Sparatus says nothing. "Do you think Saren hired the Collectors?" the turian finally asks.

Jane shrugs. "He somehow managed to get control of the Zudjari, so it's not impossible. The Collectors trade, so what would Saren have to trade with them?"

Jane, and the councilors, turn to Sparatus. The turian councilor lets out a long held in breath. "As you know- or as Vasir will explain to you- Spectres are expected to procure their own equipment, their own transport, and their own salary. Your status as a Spectre is not an unlimited credit limit. It is a license to go outside of established channels."

Jane nods. She furrows her brow. She straightens up. "Saren owns businesses."

"He has a controlling interest in Binary Helix," Sparatus confirms. The turian reaches up, pressing his finger and thumb against his nose ridge. "They are located on Noveria."

"Matriarch Benezia also owns stock in Binary Helix," Tevos adds, arms folded, "Before we go, Shepard. Status of the Prothean ruins?"

"Intact." Jane smiles. "We neutralized the Collectors without blowing anything up. We also secured an intact Sectopod that may pre-date modern Ethereal expansion."

At this, Opheg speaks up.

"Excellent. You have license from the Adventium to utilize it."

With that, the four holograms disappear. "Oh, and thanks for not blowing up the ruins, Shepard," she says, and rolls her eyes, "I don't blow things up. Saren blew up the Beacon, not me."

Turning on her heel, she walks out of the conference room. Past the CiC, and into the slow ass elevator behind the map. Tapping the floor, she leans back on the railing and whistles, checking the time on her omnitool before the doors open. Her omnitool must be lying. There is no way these elevators are fast.

Shelving the thought, she walks down the dimly lit hall and taps the green circle, opening up the well-lit medical bay and waving to the Chakwas.

On the table, normally reserved for wounded or injured crew, is a Collector. From the fact that its gut is opened up for the world to see, she's going to guess it's dead. "Autopsy?"

"Yes. So far I've identified some extensive biological augmentations. What seems off to you?"

Jane walks over. Looks down. ".I see nothing. There should be something."

"Exactly. No digestive system, for one. Basic organs. Nothing complex."

Jane turns to Chakwas as her snake doctor friend turns from the Collector to the supply section of the medical bay. "They look insectoid, though. Insects aren't that complex."

"Protheans weren't insectoid. They may look insectoid, but that is cosmetic."

Jane nods. "Like cosplaying."

"It doesn't appear to be by choice."

"Forced cosplaying. That's horrible."

Chakwas hums, sliding over to a set of containment tanks and tapping her fingers. "It is obvious that the Collectors are heavily modified. Butchered, to put it more bluntly. It is frankly disgusting from a medical standpoint, but thankfully we can alleviate that."

Jane nods. "With?"

Chakwas pulls out a vial from one of the tanks. Loads it into what appears to be a syringe attached to a fire hose. "Meld. Lots of meld."

Deep down, in that part that giggles at the sight of weird alien things and normal biological functions which resemble extranet porn, Kaidan wants to point out that Doctor T'Soni could have bought Vasir a drink before she insisted on melding minds with her. Of course, the lieutenant knows it wasn't because she wanted to have mind babies with her. He knew it was because Vasir was exposed to the Prothean Beacon, and T'Soni is one of the two foremost experts on the Protheans. Just, between Vasir and T'Soni the average age is around two centuries so why does he have to have common sense?

So, Alenko raises a hand and coughs. The debriefing room, the half circle of chairs which would normally be used by the Captain for after action reports, but is now being used by just the three of them, goes silent. "Doctor T'Soni, could we wait before we proposition the Spectre?"

Tela chortles, covering her mouth. T'Soni's cheeks turn dark blue.

"Don't worry, Doctor. I'm not offended." She pats Liara on the shoulder. "Besides which, you're as old as my kid."

Liara sits down. She tries to sit down harder, or at least further into the seat, as if trying to disappear into it.

"Anyway," Kaidan adds, "Captain Shepard also was hit by the Prothean Beacon, so you could maybe...meld with her? To get the details?" He shrugs. "If a written report isn't good enough?"

"Or you could read Shepard's mind and then T'Soni can meld with you!" Vasir pats Liara on the shoulder. The young Asari's cheeks flush dark blue. Kaidan chokes. Thankfully, the dulcet tones of Captain Shepard's voice over the intercom save everyone from having to further dwell on the Spectre's attempts at shipping.

"Hey everyone! This is your Captain speaking! AND THIS IS YOUR CAPTAIN SHOUTING! Anyway, if you've got a strong stomach and firearms training, we could use you in the Med Bay!"

Kaidan glances at Vasir. Vasir shrugs. The intercom crackles again, and Shepard adds,

"Right now!"

End Chapter 4