STEVEN'S LAST FOOT LONG
Made by: Boonaw
Influenced by Ruka Ruka Ali's song: Jared the Foot Long Lover
Seriously listen to it before you take a read
CHAPTER 1: EATING FRESH
It was a normal day on the board walk for Steven, a Subway had been added to it, and Steven's fat ass needed to eat, so he decided to go to Subway, but Steven's not the type of niguuh to eat Subway alone... Steven pulls his phone out with his soft beautiful hand, and calls his main hoe.
Steven: "Hey hey hey! Connie come to the Boardwalks subway, because my fat ass needs to eat" Steven demanded softly.
Connie: "Okay…" she said dismissively.
After 4:20 minutes of hunger passed, that little African showed up…
Connie: "Hey Steven! How a-"
Steven: "SHUT THE FUCK UP MA FAT ASS NEED TO EAT!" he said as he rudely interrupted Connie, but she didn't seem to care.
They then ran to the Subway hastily! Steven and Connie were now in Subway, and had already ordered their shit. Steven takes his first bite into delicious cheese and steak sub.
Steven: "Mmm DAMN that SHIT GOOD!" Steven exclaimed!
Connie: "Yeah I haven't tasted balls this good in a looong tiiime *wiiink" she moaned!
Steven stayed quiet, he didn't want to show her any affection… A tall man then walked beside their table...
"Hey there little kids…. Can I eat a sandwich with you?" the strange man asked….
Steven: "Um… who are you?" Steven asked…
"I'm the FOOT LONG LOVEEEER!" the man shouted!
Connie was visibly disturbed, Steven had sympathy for her, why you ask? That's for another story *wink.
Steven: "Get away from us!" Steven said angrily, with his head down.
FootLongLover: "Or I could get closer to you!" he said with a smile!
Steven: "Cah me outside how 'bout dah!?" he rebelled!
The FootLongLover just stared for a while, before putting a grotesque smile across his face, while walking out of the Subway, looking at them, only to disappear into the day.
Steven: "Ugh! Fucking freak! I hate this damn place!..." Steven said stout.
Connie: "Why did he wanna eat with us!?" she said frightened!
Steven: "I don't know, but at least he's gone…" Steven said in relief.
Steven and Connie then finished their 5 dollar foot longs, and headed for the exit. Steven opened the door like a gentlemen, only to smash her big ass nose into the door! Steven started laughing, and so did she, she laughed, I sounded weird but she laughed so hard tears were in her eyes! Heck she even got a nose bleed from the sexy Steven!
Steven: "Hahaha, aaaah let's go to my PLA-!"
Steven was interrupted by fists made of mayo aka FootLongLover!
FootLongLover: "I caught you outside! HOW 'BOUT DAT!?" he said blissfully, with no remorse for what he had just done!
Steven's teeth started to bleed.
Steven: "Wut da fuk!?" he said dazed!
Connie: "STEVEN! ARE YOU OKAH- hmph HMPH"
Connie's mouth had been covered by FootLongLover's creamy hands!
FootLongLover: "Shhh… Feel the cucumber!" he said as he unzipped his pants…
A freshly perfect cucumber then sprang out from within his pants! FootLongLover pushed Connie into the door of the Subway, then did a dash jump to Connie and hobknocked her into the door! The color dissipated from her eyes, and was replaced with a void of milk! She fell unconscious... Steven then tried to attack him but FootLongLover nipple twisted him so hard his orgasm knocked him out!
FootLongLover: "Don't worry my seeds… I'll treat you nice…" he said as he dragged them off…
CHAPTER 2: FOOT LONG TOO MUCH
FootLongLover had dragged Steven and Connie into his little hobo hut near the lighthouse… He strapped them both to a wooden, metal textured table. FootLongLover caressed Steven's anime girl face cheeks, they blushed. But Connie is what really made his mini-sub turn into a footlong, her loli features were perfect for him! FootLongLover lightly slapped Steven awake!
Steven: "AH! WHERE AM I!?" he yelled!
FootLongLover: "Shhh… I have a boner…" He whispered sofly in Steven's ear, with the creamy moisture from his breath.
Steven: "I'LL KILL YOU! EERR! Huh?"
Steven was trying to go for a punch, but he was strapped to the table! FootLongLover then crept up over him, and was squatting above him, smiling.
Steven: "Um… This is gayly uncomfortable…" he said uneasily…
FootLongLover: "So cutie, what'd you have at my Subway?" He asked.
Connie was starting to awake.
Steven: "Um um um, A-a-a 5 dollar foot long!" Steven said hastily. "Gay fuck" he whispered…
FootLongLover: "Well you're about to have my 5 dollar FOOT DOOOOONG!" he shouted then he unzipped his pants! A turkey ham sub burst from his pant, and it was a foot long!
Connie: "Uuuh… WTF!? STEVEN!" she yelled in fear as she watched in horror as the FootLongLover forced his foot dong into Steven's mouth! She saw mayo starting to form!
Connie struggled but managed to get her thin African arms and legs through the restraints. FootLongLover noticed it but she quickly drop kicked him from atop Steven! The beautiful turkey sub landed on the floor, all of its glory splattered on the floor. FootLongLover instead of smiling, frowned for the first time in this story, he looked defeated. Connie removed Steven's restraints. FootLongLover got up angrily…
FootLongLover: "Y-YOU MONSTER!" he said heavily breathing!
His eyes rolled to the back of his head, but this seemed all too familiar to Steven!
Steven: "OH NO HE'S GOING SUPA SAIYAJIN!" he said in a weeaboo manner!
Connie: "UH… Let's kill him while he's transforming!" she suggested!
Steven: "Riiiight…" he agreed.
Steven and Connie charged at him, Steven and Connie were punching him and kicking him, but to no avail, the FootLongLover didn't move a quark! The FootDong-LongLover started to violently scream, like an angry guy who just watched his friend blow up in the sky, by some white and purple alien! An explosion of light emitted from FootLongLover, very bright fucking lights. A yellow aura formed around FootlongLover, his hair turned into a turkey and ham, and his skin was hard bread, he was now in his final form, he called it The Molester Sub! FootLongLover summoned a big 'ole cumcumber, and wacked Connie's godly nose!
Connie: "WHY DOES MY NOSE KEEP GETTING HIT!?" She questioned angrily.
FootLongLover didn't reply he just Goku gut punched that little bitch! The pain was unbelievable…
Connie was on her knees now… FootLopngLover then went for the Eat Fresh Punch! Connie put her hands above her head in a guarding position, because she's a little pussy!
Connie: "AAAH I'M ONLY 12! DON'T KILL ME!" She pleaded!
FootLongLover fist stopped within an inch of her face!
FootLongLover: "Ya know… heheh… I like my women, like I like my subs, 6 and 12" he stated.
Connie gulped in fear.
"THAT'S ENOUGH JARED!" a mysterious voice said!
TheFootLongLover aka Jared, Steven, and Connie looked behind their selves!
"I use to work at a Sooubway… Now I make YouTube videos about it…" the man said as he walked from the darkness.
James: "I'm James from the Odd1sOut, and this is my pawn shop! Oops sorry the memes are getting to me, *coughs This will be the last kid you molest!" he stated as he leaped with a forward punch!
Jared also went for a forward punch! Their fists collided and the shockwave of it blew Jared's hobo hut into pieces! Steven and Connie managed to stay stationary though!
Steven: "We gotta fuse Connie!" he urged!
Connie: "Riiight!" she agreed!
Connie and Steven then did their little gay fusion dance as Jared and James were fighting! Stevonnie was born again, and joined in on the intense battle! James was occupying Jared so Stevonnie went for a Super Gem Fist but Jared's pedo senses took notice of this so he deviated from James. Jared clutched Stevonnie's fist, and threw it (hopefully that's right) towards James, Stevonnie gained her composure before it hit James. Both James and Stevonnie went in pursuit of Jared! Jared seemed to be doing well, he was dogging all their hits for some time, but they quickly overpowered Jared, with the power of friendship (even though they just met)!
Stevonnie: "Give it up! You're done!"
James: "Yeah I have YouTube videos to make!"
Jared: *panting "You guy are strong… I like a fighter…" He said with a creepy smile!
Jared noticed Stevonnie looked older now and he didn't have a hard on for them, so he decided to somehow unfuse them.
James and Stevonnie got into their stance, Jared then flying kicked James into the lighthouse! Stevonnie quickly managed to get behind the pedophile! Jared turned around only to be greeted by a judo kick to his meatballs! Jared was thrown aback by this!
Stevonnie: "I GUESS YOUR MEATBALL SUB IS GONE NOW!" it said as it did a rotational punch, into Jared's chomo face!
Jared went flying towards the light house, what a cowinkidink! James out of nowhere Knee's Jared from the back! Jared fell to the ground, forming a pile of earth.
James: "You know this would make for a great video!" he said overjoyed!
Stevonnie: "Eh this stuff happens to us all the time" it dismissed.
Jared breached the pile of earth. He had been battle damaged.
Jared: "I can't make them my lover like this…" he thought to himself… "I must call upon all the Pedo's and Child Molester's…"
Jared got up, and raised his hands to the sky! He was going to make a Pedo ball!
Stevonnie: "Huh, he's still up!?" it said shocked! "Er! Let's end this this!" it said as it darted towards Jared!
James: "Uuugh do we haaave to?" James sighed.
Stevonnie: "YES!" it replied!
Jared: "I call upon all the Pedo's and Child Molester's! Please give me your energy!" he yelled!
Out of nowhere a blue arura formed around Jared, Jared's shit burst from his body as his body engulfed the power, boosting his" MASUCLAS"! Stevonnie and James stopped in their tracks! Instead of making a ball Jared engulfed the power! Jared then summoned a long stick of bread.
Jared: "Now YOU WILL BE MINE MY SEED!" he shouted as he snap vanished to Stevonnie!
Jared smacked Stevonnie with the bread stick! It was as hard as 5 erections! Stevonnie gained its position back but Jared quickly hit the top of its head! Sending it into the ground. James, like the ninja he is, shot a drawing tablet pen into Jared's leg! Jared screamed in pain, James had no time to waste so he did a meteor crash on Jared (If you don't know what it is, go play a Dragon Ball Z game)! Jared wasn't affected by it at all though, he just healed from it!
Jared: "I guess I'll kill you to, sense I'm not into grownup features" Jared said demonically.
Jared threw an Eat Fresh uppercut at James, crushing some of his teeth! Then he slapped James, and side kicked him into the ground right next to Stevonnie. Jared picked up James by the hair.
James: "Omg so much pa-aa-aain!" he cried.
Stevonnie looked up at Jared and James, daized. Jared had a giant smile on his happy 'ole face!
Jared: "I hope YOU FEEL THE CUMCUMBER!" Jared said as he forced a big cucumber into James anus!
James: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH" he screamed!
That cucumber went straight in him, there wasn't even lube to make it easier for him… Jared let go of James. James had fallen, and couldn't get up.
Stevonnie: "Wha-what do you want!?" she asked, defeated.
Jared: "…. I want YOUR BOOTY!" Jared said and another turkey ham foot dong sprouted from his unzipped pants.
Stevonnie could no longer hold the fusion and unfused.
Jared: "Oh… That's even better…" he said in a sinister tone.
Steven and Connie: "DARN IT" they said!
Garnet: "NOT SO FAST!" Garnet shouted!
Jared turned around confused!
Garnet: "THIS IS YOUR END! FOR WE ARE THE CRYSTAL GEMS!"
Pearl and Amethyst got in their fighting stances and they all charged at Jared.
CHAPTER 3: SUBWAY DISASTER
Garnet hit Jared with a barrage of punches! This knocked him back allot, he could not regain his balance in time, so Pearl used that to her advantage and summoned her spear and stabbed Jared right in his right lung, crafty bitch! Jared coughed out some osteoporosis, Amethyst then, dash kicked him in the face, and uppercut his gut! Pearl and Amethyst then restrained his movements by holding his arms and legs back. Garnet then walk up to him like a badass.
Jared: "Fuck… FUCK! I'LL FUCK THOSE KIDS!" he stated while coughing out autism-osteoporosis!
Garnet: "DISGAUSTING! DISGAUSTING!" she shouted as she summoned her gauntlet.
Garnet then hook punched Jared in the face. Garnet thought it would break his neck, but he was resisting!
Jared: "GAAH! 5 DOLLAR! 5 DOLLAR! 5 DOLLAR FOOT DOOOOOONG!" he chanted.
Jared got even stronger and broke from Pearl and Amethyst grip! He spin kicked them away. A giant cucumber sprouted from his pants!
Jared: "NOW I'M REALLLY HORNY!" he yelled angrily!
Jared cross hobknocked Garnet's face, he went for a Baked Punch but his hand went through her afro, it had so many tangles that his arm got stuck in there, Garnet then proceeded to continuously gut punch him! Jared was losing energy fast and was coughing and throwing osteoporosis, wait I mean blood up! Pearl then stabbed him through his left lung, barley missing the heart!
Pearl: "Well at least my aim is getting' better" she stated.
But Jared's pedo energy kept him going! Amethyst then whipped him like a slave. Jared was just being physically rapped, metaphorically speaking of course *flaunts glasses.
Jared: "I will not die without my foot dong in someone!" he stated!
James: "JARED! THIS IS THE END!" he yelled!
Everyone stopped and looked at James!
Jared: "I thought I killed you!" he said in disbelief.
James: "Well… You didn't… NOW TAKE THIS!" James yelled!
James clutched his fist, a ball of energy formed around it!
James: "That cucumber hurt!" he said epically!
James then boosted forward at a tremendous speed! Garnet, Amethyst and Pearl stepped away from Jared. James was had now popped Jared bubble!
James: "FUCK SOOUBWAAAY!" he screamed!
James then punched Jared in the gut sending him flying! Garnet grabbed Jared by his silky knees and threw him towards the ground! Pearl the kneed him in the guts!
Jared: "AAAAGH!" he screeched!
Amethyst summoned her whip and then bitch whipped Jared to the ground! Stevonnie out of nowhere comes up to Jared and does a flying spin kick to his juicy nuts, and judo kicks his chin! Stevonnie then pulls out its sword and Stabbed Jared threw his guts!
James: "Let's put an end to this!"
James summoned the mythical sprinkle storm to finish off Jared! The storm was a very powerful! A bolt of sprinkles shocked Jared, and a huge explosion set off! They had finally thought they'd beaten him, but the smoke cleared, only to find Jared in a new form, the Minecrafter!
Jared: "Oooh this new form of mine really makes me hungry for kids!"
Stevonnie: "Omg… Wtf!" it said in shock!
Garnet looked scared, very scared!
Pearl: "Oh no! G-Gaaarnet what do we do!?" she asked fearfully!
Garnet: "He has become a pure pedo… We can't beat him!"
Amethyst: "But what if we fuse!? All of us including, that weird looking human over there!?" she suggested.
James: "HEY! I'M NOT WEIRD! I'm special." He replied!
Garnet: "Not even that much power in enough!"
Jared: "Enough dialogue! That's what I like about Minecraft, there's barely any in it!"
Jared then unfused Stevonnie, with a punch he called Builders delight! Jared then grabbed Connie and Steven and brought them above the lighthouse!
Connie: "Uuugh! Let! US GO!" she shouted as she tried to break free!
Steven: "EER! H-he's too strong!"
Garnet: "NO!" she said as jumped towards Jared!
Jared put out his hand and blasted Garnet! She was no match for the blast, since she had diffused because of it!
Jared: "Hey little African, you know it feels better when they ain't awake!" he stated in a perverted manner with a wink!
Jared held Connie from his arm, and then released Steven, Pearl went to Steven's safety, and put him genteelly on the ground. Jared proceeded to punch Connie in her temple, but his hand got gravitationally attracted to her nose knocking her out cold! Her nose bled like a, bleed nose! The bruise was so big it made her nose the biggest of all, a Jew nose!
Jared: "Oops! I guess she's dead now… Necrophilia was on my to-do list anyways." He struggled to say.
A circular opening split the clouds, and a light shinned on Connie and Jared, it was almost make believe, like this story. Connie floated up, out of the grasps of Jared rapist hand. She was then struck by lightning! But it wasn't ordinary lightning, it was the power of a God, A JEW GOD! Connie woke up immediately, and knew exactly what to do with her new found powers!
Connie: "IT'S TIME TO GO JARED!" she said as superior voices echoed the same.
Jared could only see love, and a good sex life from now on, so he dashed at her! She teleported to him and karate chopped his cucumber off!
Jared: "AAAAAAAAAH" he screamed like a little girl!
Connie then opened her Jew nose, and sucked in! The force of Connie's sucking *wink, was too much for Jared, and he flew within her nose, where he was digested by Hitler's gas chamber! But before Jared died he said one thing…
Jared: "I'll come back AS A GOD! Oh and don't forget to buy a 5 dollar foot long!" he strained to say.
Jared had been killed by the power of Jewish noses! Connie then lost all her powers, her big ass nose was reduced to her normal nose now, she then fell lightly to the ground, because she doesn't weigh much, she's African.
James: "OMG FINALLY IT'S ALL OVER! Well guys I would like to stay and chat but…." he said as he just left the conversation open for interpretation.
Steven: "I'm never eating another foot d-long again…" Steven said traumatized.
Steven and Connie were sent to the hospital, the Subway was then destroyed by the B.L.M. movement not a day later. Then everything went back to normal, whatever that is. Oh and James made a video about all of it, but no one believed him… Obviously…
THE END