A/N: Sooooo, anybody play Overwatch these days? Anyone up for a few matches? My gamer tag out to make it obvious who I am XD

I FINALLY picked up a copy the other day and I'm a BEAST with Reaper and Widowmaker. They're surprisingly fun to play as. The others...eh, not so much. Its pretty fun! And I'm looking forward to Doomfist's eventual arrival! It's gonna be big! Oddly enough, I actually found my passion for writing Overwatch Fiction through Omahdon on youtube. Watch her Overwatch videos, they're friggin hilarious! I especially enjoyed the Workplace Drama one, if you know what I mean.

So, when the request came down the pipeline, I had to do it.

Also, requests are temporarily closed until March so I can update everything. There will be ONE more new story after this, after which, I'm dedicating myself to updating all my stories and finally FINISHING them. *Sees torches and pitchforks* HEY have some faith! So now, here we are!

Also, points for anyone who can translate what Widowmaker is saying.

PREPARE TO LAUGH YOURSELF SILLY!

=D

"This is the part where you start grovelling."

"MERDE!"

BANG!

~A rather interesting meeting...

Not My Watch

So.

Overwatch.

Never before in my life have I needed something so much and never known until I received it.

Naruto, you ask what's so interesting about Overwatch? What could possibly catch the attention of an undead, dimension-hopping deity like yourself? What indeed, dear readers! Go ahead. Guess. Was it the richly cultivated story? The brewing conflict between Omnics and Humanity? That fine line between man and machine and what we know aa a soul? The witty quips? Those dashing costumes? No? C'mon! You still haven't figured it out? Seriously? My newfound interest in this explosive world can be summed up in three simple words.

Girls!

Guns!

Gorillas!

So I decided it would be a LOVELY universe to take a vacation in.

Just plain ol' hilarity and mayhem.

That's right, no godly duties. No keeping the galaxy in check. No world-shaking battles with demons threatening the very balance of life and death. No meddling in world affairs or mucking about with governments. Well, not too much. I might establish an empire if like it here, just for shits and giggles. So yes, needless to say, it caught my interest. I can read some of these folks like a book. Some are good, others, evil. The rest, not so much.

None more so than a certain widow...

(...)

When I was a girl, I had a fear of spiders.

I was told they felt no emotion.

That their hearts never beat.

But I know the truth.

Widowmaker smiled softly to herself as she glided across the rooftops of King's Row, a pale wraith in the night. Little more than a twitching of her lips, one wouldn't have noticed her amusement unless they were looking directly at her. Those unfortunate enough to actually catch sight of the elusive Talon operative soon found themselves wishing they hadn't. Then, they weren't wishing at all. She descended on any she encountered with cold merciless violence, leaving any security she encountered for the buzzards. Quick, clean kills, and it was with each kill that she felt her pulse quicken, her heart racing in a subtle burst of pleasure. Yes, she knew the truth of spiders, indeed.

At the moment of the kill, they are never more alive.

This was her undeniable reality.

Truth? A tiny voice-disturbingly akin to her own-scoffed as she clung to the darkness, the words harsh and cutting. What truth do you know, little Amelie? You're just Talon's doll. A puppet dancing on their strings. You don't have a scrap of free will and you know it. THERE is your truth. Do you even know what they made you? Do you even care about Gerard, anymore?

Scowling, she forced the rare impulse away and continued her preparations.

No, that was absurd.

Slipping back into the light, she flung her grappling hook forward, burying its tip into a brick outcropping. A nearby guard started at the sound, turning to glance at the metal protrusion. Amateur. He never saw the blow hammer into his neck, never felt it break until he was already dead. His companion was still turning when she spun and drove the butt of her rifle into his face. The man grunted in surprise and tried to raise his weapon, only for a silenced round to drive home through his skull and silence him forevermore. Widowmaker carefully lowered his body to the ground and, the final obstacle removed, she began her final preparations.

Winding the thread of her hook around her left leg, she braced herself on the edge of the roof.

Then she dropped.

A fleeting sensation of weightlessness consumed her for but a moment, then inertia kicked in. Wind rushed through her hair, tickled her face. She should have experienced something. But she felt nothing. Upside down, she merely raising her rifle and too aim. Her multi-faceted goggles clamped down around her eyes and enhanced her vision. What she was attempting would've been an impossible shot for most; even a member of that once-vaunted Overwatch organization would've been hard-pressed to attempt such a maneuver. Not so, Widowmaker.

Her mission was simple.

Set up in King's Row and assassinate the omnic monk Tekhartha Mondatta at the upcoming peace rally. Make it public. Make certain everyone saw him die. She didn't need to know why. Didn't need to care. There was only the mission. She would carry out her mission. The omnic would die and she would return to base to receive her next assignment. That was all. There was only the mission.

The target.

The shot.

The kill.

There was no wind to speak of, and no one had detected her intrusion.

She saw the so called "savior" of the omnics through her scope now, a target through the narrowest of windows. His white skull and lights made him the perfect target. He was speaking to his so-called faithful from the podium, utterly unaware that he stood squarely in a spider's sights. Soon, he would be aware of nothing, save his own death. Imbecile.

The slightest of smirks plucked at her pale lips.

"There you are."

Her finger tightened on the trigger, locking on. Just the slightest twitch, and Mondatta would be no more-

-then something small, black, and brimming with far too many legs swung into her sights. Scowling, Widowmaker tried to twitch out of the way and readjust, but the insect merely followed her, dangling on a thread of silk. Without thinking she reflexively reached up to swat it, not yet realizing what had even dangled itself in her sights. Mistake. The ghastly little creature chose that moment to spring onto the back of her hand and in an instant, she realized exactly what she was looking at it. Eight red eyes stared up at her with malevolent glee.

Golden orbs narrowed, widened explosively.

"Oh, mon dieu." she swore.

The black widow seemed to dangle there on her palm, mocking her as it defied gravity. Despite its lack of a human face, she could've sworn it smiled.

And then, impossibly, it spoke.

"Bonjour, mon cheri!"

"EEEK!"

Looking back, Amelie Lacroix couldn't quantify the sudden outburst of emotion that compelled her to react the way she did; that burst of raw, instinctual terror at the sight of one of her childhood fears actually coming to life and speaking to her. She couldn't explain it. Nor could she explain the sudden and undignified shriek that exploded from her all at once. Screaming, she threw herself backward, abandoning her shot to fire wildly at the eight-legged abomination. Impossibly the little devil actually cackled at her and dodged all her bullets with punitive ease, swinging easily on a thread of seemingly indestructible silk.

"Ohohoho!"

Even as she spat endless French profanities at her tormentor and flailed on her line, Widowmaker was aware of her monumental blunder. Damnit! She'd all but blown her mission wide open; her outburst and subsequent shooting spree had attracted all sorts of unwanted attention below. Mondatta-her target!-was likely fleeing the scene even now, ushered by his guards into an armored limousine. She couldn't bring herself to care. There was only the disgusting little arachnid before her, that terrible age-old fear and the need to squash it, to KILL it before it crawled all over her!

Kill, kill, kill!

As such, she was completely unprepared when her "spider" suddenly became something else entirely, gaining form and mass where there had been none, a riot of gold and white exploding upwards. In almost no time at all it didn't resemble a spider at all, but rather, a man. An laughing, grinning, glowing man. His hand shot out, seizing her by the face and flinging her backwards with incredible force. The next she knew, her back kissed a wall then slammed through it, sending her tumbling out into open space. If not for her extensively modified body, she would've shattered her spine. By the time she thought to use her grappling hook her attacker was on her again, a booted foot driving her back to the ground. Rather, another rooftop.

Widowmaker didn't get mad. She got even.

"Alright," a rough voice growled in her ear, "I've seen and done some fucked up shit in my day, but this? We're shooting robot monks now? That's an all new kind of low. Still! You're actually afraid of spiders! Ha! Who would've guessed?"

By some miracle she'd managed to hold onto her rifle in the chaos, and now she took aim at him.

His sharp blue eyes seemed focused intently on the unfolding chaos below, paying no notice to her for the time being. It gave Widowmaker a chance to take stock of to him. His state of dress was almost comical in its absurdity and outlandishness; she didn't see a single matching piece anywhere amongst his odd attire.

All black jeans with light orange plating scattered haphazardly upon the joints and other odd places, the random bits of armor flowing up past a strange belt with little red-and-white spheres tethered round his waist, accompanied by an equally strange meta cylinder. All of this lead up to an eerie ebony chest piece, partially obscuring what looked like chainmail of all things. It was so archaic that she didn't know how to respond in the slightest. If Widowmaker had to guess, he looked as though he just walked out of one of those eccentric anime-cons Gerard had been fond of. Where those red horns coming out of his head?

Merde, but what was it with this fool and orange?

And there, tethered to his back by a thick orange-of course it was orange!-strap and, somehow defying the very laws of gravity and physics themselves, was a giant knife. It looked as though someone had taken a giant cleaver, wrapped its tang in bandages, and left the job unfinished. It radiated death on an almost primal level, and just looking at it made her head hurt. How he stood with that thing on his back was beyond her...and irrelevant! Snatching up her gun, she pointed it a him once more, only to find that he had somehow gotten behind her in the last blink.

"So," the stranger began slowly, "Widowmaker, right? I'm Naruto. Self-proclaimed god, walker of the multiverse, wrecker of everybody's shit, blah, blah, blah. Let's skip the introductions, neh? This is the part where you say I'm sorry, I won't do it agai-

BANG!

Naruto nimbly ducked the short, beaming.

"Ha! Missed! Now, en grad!"

Widowmaker frowned.

"You're not even saying it right, pig!"

The blond paused.

"I'm not?"

"NO!" she hissed. "It's en garde! Bouffon!"

"Don't you mean buffoon-

"Allez-vous-en!"

"Nope!"

"Merde!" she hissed and spun, blasting him point blank.

It was a very good shot a very small part of Widowmaker thought; the sniper round ripped from the barrel to blast him right between his eyes and punched a hole in his skull. The horned blond tottered on his feet for a precarious moment, eyes glazed. Then he toppled backward with a dull thud. Widowmaker exhaled fiercely, glaring bloody red daggers at the corpse. Warily, she nudged it with her foot. Odd. It was still...twitching. Still, just who did that fool think he was? He hadn't even tried to disarm her, or at the very least, try to dodge-

A hand clapped down on her shoulder from behind and quite abruptly, she found herself frozen in place.

What sorcery was this?!

Why couldn't she move her body?!

"Oh, Widowmaaaaaaaaaakeeeeeeer~!" Naruto's distorted voice slithered in her ear, silken with menace, "That wasn't very nice. Here I am trying to be your friend, trying to help you, and you put a hole in my head. A man might get the wrong idea if a girl keeps trying to kill him. A girl wouldn't like that. A girl might find herself someplace...unpleasant. Like the surface of the sun. Now," he continued, absently patting her frozen cheek, "Here's what you're going to do for me. You're going to drop your gun and slowly, very slowly, turn around. We're going to have a chat like the adults we are."

"Ce n'est pas demain la veille!" she ground out through gritted teeth.

"Oh, you're a sassy one." the blond laughed. "Now. MOVE."

Against her will, she found herself doing just that.

Widowmaker hissed, fighting the forces controlling her, to no avail. It felt as if someone had physically taken control of her body; like she was a mere puppet and this stranger was pulling all her strings. Stiffly her body turned, rifle dropping from nerveless fingers. She turned, obeying him even as she cursed him, resolving not to flinch. She would not give this idiot the satisfaction of having bested her, she was loyal to Talon and she'd not falter, she would not bend, she would not break, she would not...not...not...

Her stomach nearly bolted.

Naruto was indeed standing there.

So too was his wound.

As this range, she could clearly see the bloody hole where her bullet had bored through to shatter his his skull; just as she could also see the city lights of King's Row shining through said hole and what remained of his brain. It was a mortal wound that would've dropped anyone but Reaper, and that he was still standing without any obvious signs of regeneration was...chilling, all things said. As though spurred on by that very thought, his forehead began to mold itself back together as she looked on; flesh and bone flowing like seamless milk, the grievous wound stitching shut before her very eyes.

Yet again, she felt that odd prickle of fear.

...wait...how did...what even are you?! How are you even standing?!"

"Two words, love." the blond mocked in a sing-song voice. "Infinite. Respawns. Now, mademoiselle! Perhaps you'd reconsider and hear me out?"

The assassin growled.

"No."

"Aw, why not?"

"Because you are a foolish boy." she growled through clenched teeth. "And I do not deal with fools." Stall. She had to stall. If the dropship made here, then maybe, just maybe she'd have an out...

"Oh, are you waiting for your ride?" her tormentor interjected. "I'm sorry. Blew that up about an hour ago."

"Et je jure que cette fois, je te tuerai!"

"Right, right. Sticks and stone and all that." the self-professed deity purred in reply. "Its not very fun being compelled to do something against your will, is it? But if its any consolation, getting shot hurts like hell. Now, I know you've been brainwashed to hell and back, and frankly, that rubs me the wrong way. So!" Pacing away from her stiff body, the blond spun around and spread his arms wide, almost as if he were silently beseeching the heavens for aid. "I decided to play you a little visit before I have my fun." he winked in what he no doubt thought to be a dashing manner. "Think of it as a late Christmas present. You get a miracle! Free of charge! No more Talon brainwashing! Maybe then you'll be more...inclined to help me build that empire I've been working on."

A flash of cold dread-and strangely hope?-hit Widowmaker all at once.

"Don't you dare-

"Hmm?" Naruto tilted his head, eyes flashing gold. "I already did. Undid it, that is. Just now. The shock should be hitting you any second now."

"You filthy little-

That was all she heard before her world flared red and her knees buckled.

A riot of images hit her all at once; noises, sights, sounds. Screams.

And emotion.

So much ANGER.

Widowmaker felt rather than heard herself utter a soundless scream. Felt her body collapse and go boneless, strength fleeing from her limbs and leaving her as helpless as a newborn babe. Pain ricocheted in her ears, a piercing ringing blotting out all else. It felt as though someone had jabbed an ice pick behind her eyes and poked around in her brain, leaving a pounding migraine. Feeling herself fading, she had just enough strength to raise her head and stare into those inky blue eyes. To watch, as their owner crouched, to scowl, as that scarred hand idly peeled the goggles off her head. No. Not scowl. Strange. Why was she smiling? Instead of anger she experienced only blessed relief, a relief mingled with pain, it was all coming back, the enormity of what she'd done, what she'd become, weighing down on her like a lead brick.

"Welcome to my parlor, little spider." he hummed. "Sweet dreams. We can talk about payback over pancakes."

"That's...that's not even...

Naruto merely smiled.

"I know. Sleep."

And blackness took her.

A/N: Cry havoc and let slip the dogs of madness and war! Expect all sorts of hijinks and mayhem ahead and vote for the pairings! As a side note I always felt bad for Widowmaker. She's been in a hell not of her own making for awhile now, and I don' see her coming out of anytime soon. So! I threw her a lifeline in the only way I knew how. Also, fuck Talon. Fuck, fuck, fuck em. I did some reading on the organization and they're a real bag of dicks! Not to say that I hate Reaper and Sombra, not at all!

This is going to be one hell of a wild ride, updated REGULARLY, as in weekly, depending on whether you guys like it. I've finally got a damn schedule for this! I'm also accepting beta readers at this time, so if you're down for that, have at it.

What does Naruto have planned you ask?

Why, you'll have to stay tuned for that!

So in the Immortal Words of Atlas...

...Review Would You Kindly?

And Naturally...

...ENJOY THE PREVIEWS! HOPE YOU ENJOY!

(Previews)

"Boy, you know tranquility can kill you."

"Ack!"

"Beep-dee-beep!"

"What's that? Bastion? You want to be able to eat pancakes? No problem!"

"Tu es l'animal idiot qui m'a humilié, qui m'a coûté mon emploi!"

"Alright, I know you're angry, but-OW I NEED THOSE!"

"You kinda had that coming, papi."

"PISS OFF SOMBRA!"

"That's it. I'm out. I'm done. I quit!"

"Aw, Reaper! Its only been two rounds! I'll even stand still this time! No cheating, I swear!"

...really?"

"Really!"

"In that case, you can DIE DIE DIE!"

...its only battleship, ya know."

;3