Title: Unimaginable, You And I (Until We Were All I Imagined)

Pairing: Lucius Malfoy/Lily Evans, one-sided James Potter/Lily Evans

Summary: If Lily Evans had to choose between dating James Potter or dating the Giant Squid, she'd date the Giant Squid. Scratch that. She'd rather date Lucius Malfoy.


Lily Evans hated James Potter. He was an arrogant bullying toerag, and she never wanted to see him again. For this, though, she might be able to get him expelled. It was the only somewhat positive bit of this nightmare. Severus Snape, her very best friend, hung upside-down in the air. He struggled to get free as he yelled obscenities and threats.

"What was that, Snivellus? I didn't understand. I don't speak slimy snake," Sirius Black taunted. For all his good looks, he was one of the ugliest people Lily knew.

"Let me down right now, or I'll—"

"Sorry, didn't catch that either." James Potter grinned and bounced on his toes, like an unruly child. "Sirius and I don't speak dirt poor."

The part that hurt most of all was the laughing. The other students just stood around and bloody well laughed, jeering and pointing at Severus. No one was even trying to help him. She loathed it. Lily despised each person in that audience of cowards.

Magic was supposed to be beautiful.

Potter reminded her that magic was ugly; sometimes, magic was the most hideous thing she had ever seen. Yes, Muggles could be bullies. But Muggles couldn't curse someone with pimples, or take away someone's free will with a love potion (and think it was all a bit of fun, instead of assault). Sometimes what people did with magic made Lily want to vomit. More than once, she had seriously considered withdrawing from Hogwarts and going home, never to return.

But home wasn't much better than Hogwarts. Not anymore. Not with a Mum and Dad who couldn't understand the magical world, and certainly not with Petunia, her once beloved sister. Petunia, who called her a "freak" and "unnatural" and insisted Lily had to be adopted; after all, Petunia was "normal," so they couldn't possibly be related by blood. Lily still hadn't decided if Petunia's words stung so much because she loved her sister, or if it was because her parents only rolled their eyes and never stopped it from happening.

Lately, it felt like Lily was on a battlefield. Curses flew left and right. Bodies dropped all around her, relationships tore asunder, and she was in the middle of it. Severus was the only person at her side. Her willow wand and his wand kept up a once-admirable shield that was starting to flicker under the onslaught. She didn't know how much longer they would last.

She stalked forward. The students spread to let her through, and it wasn't because of her Prefect badge. In general, Lily kept a firm grasp on her temper. When Lily was mad, she was biting. And when Lily was enraged, bad things happened. "Potter!" She snapped his name like a rubber band stretched beyond its limits.

Without missing a beat, Potter turned to face her. He beamed at her. He bloody grinned at her, all the way to his eyes, as if he didn't have her best friend strung up in the air. His emotions flipped from cruelty to admiration in the space of a huffed breath. It terrified her. He was unstable. Potter reminded her of the rumors of insanity which surrounded the previous Dark Lord.

"Yes, Lily-Flower?" He winked at her and flipped his messy chin-length hair. Several girls sighed.

"Don't call me that!"

She almost punched him in the face. Lily would wager that he wouldn't smile at her like she was mindless and obsessed with him if she broke his nose. Not even the brainless chits sighing at him would find him attractive with blood pouring down his face and staining his perfect teeth. The only reason she didn't—and Merlin, it was so hard to resist—was because Lily couldn't live through another detention. Not when Potter somehow always got himself into detention with her. If she was forced to spend another hour locked in a room with him while they wrote lines or scrubbed cauldrons—

"Let Severus down, Potter." She felt guiltier than ever for dragging Severus to Hogsmeade last weekend. He had planned to teach her some of the new spells he invented. Instead of having the knowledge to free him, Lily had three new quills, some ink in various colors, and a parcel of sweets from Honeydukes in her trunk.

Potter smirked and held out his hand to her. "I will if you'll go out with me, Evans."

If Lily had to choose between a date with Potter and a date with the Giant Squid, she would pick the Giant Squid. She opened her mouth to tell him that, but didn't get the chance.

"Lily," Remus Lupin interrupted.

She wouldn't even look at him. Lupin was supposed to be one of her best friends, but sometimes she couldn't stand him. She had refused to accept his cowardice in the face of Potter and Black's bullying ways for too long. She was done. If he was willing to let her best friend be publically humiliated just because Potter was bored or feeling like more of a toerag than usual, their friendship was over.

"Let Severus down, Lupin," Lily ordered. He winced when she called him by his last name; she refused to apologize. If he wanted to act like someone without a conscience, she would treat him like a stranger.

"Okay," Lupin whispered.

"Remus, don't—"

The objection came too late. Lily flicked her wand and silently cast a charm to catch Severus before he landed on his head and became even more injured and humiliated than he already was. She thrust her hand down at him. For a second, she thought he was going to smack it away. "My Charms essay can wait. I'm ready for you to teach me now."

Severus's mouth snapped shut. Grudgingly, he took her hand. It wasn't all for show, though. It broke her heart that she was physically strong enough to pull him to his feet. And, not for the last time, Lily contemplated murdering her best friend's parents: Tobias, for what he had done, and Eileen, for all she had failed to do. Severus was skin and bones.

Somehow, her best friend managed to swallow all the scathing words he would normally be spitting at Potter about now. He grabbed her hand and pushed his way through the crowd. "I . . ."

"Expelliarmus!"

Lily cast a shield just in time to block Potter's spell. How like the git to attack someone from behind. "Just stop it, Potter! Grow up already!"

"You haven't given me an answer yet, Lily-Flower," James said. "Drop the slimy Slytherin's hand and let me escort you to dinner." He winked. "Come on! Just one date?"

Her response came swift and vicious; she didn't regret it. "I'd shag Malfoy before I'd date you, Potter!"

Their snickering audience fell silent.

Black stepped up beside Potter, looking as disgusted as Petunia did when she spat the word magic. "You don't mean that, Evans," Black whispered.

"Yes, I do," Lily hissed. She flipped her hair over her shoulder and let them see her smirk when nearly every boy followed the gesture with his eyes. Her hair was dark red, reminiscent of the finest of wines. In a school of people with brown, blond, and black hair, she stood out from everyone.

Potter scoffed. "Nice one, Evans." He looked like he wanted to vomit. "You almost had me there." He rolled his eyes. "Like you'd pick Malfoy over me."

"Oh, but I would," Lily said, driving the dagger deeper. "If I wanted to be some pureblood's pet Muggle-born, I'd offer myself to Malfoy without even giving you a chance." He stumbled back a step; her grin widened. "For all that he can be a smarmy bastard, Malfoy's a class act. Everything that he owns is always in pristine condition. His family keeps artifacts as heirlooms, instead of getting rid of something valuable just because something new and shiny comes along." She leaned forward, as if sharing a secret, though she spoke loud enough everyone could hear her. "If I gave myself to him, he'd never let go. He'd probably keep me around for the novelty of knowing he was the only one to ever have me. And since I was wholly his, well, he couldn't let anyone else take what was his, could he?"

"How could you say that?" Potter asked. It was biting and theatrical, as if she had just accused him of rigging a Quidditch match. "How could you say you'd choose Malfoy over me?"

"Because it's the truth."

"I don't believe you, Evans!"

"I don't care!"

She kept the shield up as Severus tugged her hand, refusing to give the group of bullies another second of her time. If she weren't so used to rushing to keep up with his long strides, she would've tripped and dragged them both to the ground.

As Severus ushered her past his Slytherin friends, who hadn't been there when she went to confront Potter, Lily inhaled so hard that her lungs burned. Lucius Malfoy was leaning against the castle wall, his sycophants around him. His silver eyes darkened the closer Severus led her, melting into pewter. In front of loads of witnesses, she had claimed she would shag him and let him own her. Then she had sworn she was telling the truth.

Merlin, the next few weeks were going to be awkward.


"Oi, Evans, can I have a minute?"

Lily sighed and clutched the strap of her book bag. In the past five days, Hogwarts had become more unbearable than home when Petunia was at her nastiest. Guys propositioned her left and right. According to the newest rumor, she was easy. It was extremely insulting.

"What do you want, Smith?" Lily asked. She pasted a smile on her face that wouldn't fool anyone with a lick of sense.

Hezekiah Smith beamed at her. "This is for you, Evans," he said, before shoving a package at her.

"Thank you." Though she had seen the sixth-year Hufflepuff Prefect in meetings, they had never interacted socially. Still, her mother had taught her to say "thank you" after being given a gift when she was three years old. Lily already disappointed her mother enough. She could still do this simple thing right.

Before Lily could put it in her bag to open later, Smith asked, "Aren't you going to open it?"

Though she wanted nothing more than to eat lunch, because she missed breakfast finishing up an essay, she said, "Yes. Of course I'll open it now." It was a lumpy package that clinked. The wrapping was plain brown paper and messy enough that she knew it had been done by hand. It reminded her of Severus's gifts to others before he asked her to do all his wrapping for him. There was a spell to wrap gifts, of course, but she and Severus considered that cheating. As for Smith, it wouldn't surprise her in the least if laziness prevented him from learning the charm.

"Well, do you like it?" Smith asked. His gaze was much too intense; frankly, it alarmed her.

"It's—" Lily removed the last bit of paper; it crumpled into a ball in her fist. How dare he! Seriously, of the rubbish she had put up with over the last five days, this insult was the worst by far. "It's a collar," she ground out.

Smith nodded and grinned. "Since you said you want to be a pureblood's pet Muggle-born, I wanted to let you know I'm interested." He waved his hand at the collar. "You'll become accustomed to stuff of this quality if you belong to me."

"My parents are Muggles," Lily snarled. "That doesn't mean I'm poor and uneducated." She threw the collar at him as hard as she could, viciously pleased with the feminine yelp Smith gave when it hit him. "If you think costume jewelry is going to pass as gold and diamonds, you're as stupid as Potter!"

"Evans! Wait, Evans!"

Continuing to ignore him, Lily raced down the corridor. She shook with rage. How dare he! What right did Smith have to act like he could buy her? Honestly, the collar wasn't the greatest insult. No, it was the fact he had given her something so cheap, implying that she was as worthless as bargain bin leftovers. Bastard!

Lily stormed into the great hall. Most of the students were already there for lunch. She swerved away from the Gryffindor table, unable to stomach the thought of having to deal with Potter right after this latest fiasco.

"Miss Evans," Lucius Malfoy acknowledged as she stopped at his right side.

Lily sketched a mocking curtsey. "May I eat lunch at the Slytherin table please, Malfoy?"

"Why?" Malfoy asked. It was the same question he asked her every time she made the request. As the Emperor of Slytherin, he got to decide who sat at the table. It was one of his many, many unofficial duties.

"Because I need Severus's help to plot a poisoning that lingers, is difficult to detect, but won't be fatal," she replied. Lily almost always kept her head, but when she didn't, revenge was swift.

"Barty." All Lucius had to say was his name and Bartemius Crouch Jr. slid down a space. It opened up the seat to Severus's left. Severus always sat directly across from Lucius.

Lily didn't thank him. She never did.

"Who are we poisoning?" Severus asked after she sat down. He grabbed a pitcher of water and poured her a glass. Both of them hated pumpkin juice. Severus despised it because his father tried to drown him in a vat of it. Lily loathed it because Severus did, and she supported him in any way she could.

The minute she turned seventeen, they were going to swear a blood oath as siblings. Then neither of them would be unloved or unprotected from family ever again. If they used the right potion, they could even start their own bloodline. She was still debating what their new last name would be. All Lily knew was that she wouldn't budge on the topic. And once she decided to let Severus in on the plan, he would be all for it.

"Smith." Lily curled her fingers around the knife at her place setting. She eyed the Hufflepuff table, where the bastard sat with his fellow sixth years. He looked offended. It boggled her mind. Why was he offended?

"Which one?" Crouch asked. He licked his bottom lip as he scanned the Hufflepuffs. It was a nervous tick that amused her. She didn't think purebloods were allowed to have nervous ticks.

"The Bastard Prefect," Lily replied. Her voice was cheerful and bright; every Slytherin within hearing distance froze. She knew why. Last time they heard her speak like that, Potter and Black cost the Gryffindor Team the Quidditch Cup in an unforgettable manner.

"What?" Malfoy asked. Lily had never seen him look so discomposed before. He gaped at her, as if someone had just told him being obscenely wealthy was out-of-style. "What did Smith do?"

"He tried to buy me."

Regulus Black, an adorable brat who was nothing like his brother, leaned forward from the other side of Crouch. "Are you poisoning him because he offered to buy you, or because his offer was insulting?" He was much too curious, but that never stopped Lily from indulging the boy.

"The first," Severus answered for her. People often accused him of reading her mind. They had no idea how true that was, or that he only did so because she welcomed him through her Occlumency shields. His brow furrowed as he frowned at her, hurt and anger flashing through his black eyes. "But the offer was so insulting that he deserves a lingering, non-lethal poison."

"Hmm." Malfoy folded his arms and tapped his index finger against his bicep. "I see." He turned his focus from Severus to her. Lily fought not to fidget; when Malfoy stared right at her, he made her feel like she was the only person that mattered in his life. "And what did Smith decide was the going price for a pet Muggle-born?" When Lucius threw her own words back at her in a dark taunt, it didn't bother her. It never had.

Lily stabbed her ham with her knife. The metal clinked against the plate, and then scraped obnoxiously. She blinked; Smith's face disappeared from her mind's eye. "A cheap piece of costume jewelry."

A scoff sounded from halfway down the table. "I'd pay more for you than that, and I hate you, Lily."

Without sparing the girl a glance, Lily retorted, "I know, Narcissa. You hate everyone who's prettier than you. Luckily, I don't have the reverse complex. I'd never accomplish anything if I spent all my time hating women who aren't as pretty as I am." Narcissa Black was the catty female version of Sirius Black. How those nightmares were related to Regulus, she would never understand.

Lucius laughed, full and deep and seductive; his shoulders shook with it. "You found a real treasure as a child, Severus," he said.

Severus lifted one eyebrow. It was his politest way of saying "Duh!" without words.

"Thank you, Miss Evans, for helping Severus," Malfoy said. "Marius Avery came to get me when he saw what was happening. He's only a second year, so it wasn't safe for him to interfere." Malfoy stood and rolled his shoulders backwards. It was no wonder that he was the Emperor of Slytherin. Everything about Malfoy was high class and upper crust.

"I didn't do it for you," Lily said.

Malfoy smirked and came around the end of the table. "I know you didn't. You did it for family." He stopped right behind her, but Lily wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of making her turn around. The heat of him at her back was soothing and unnerving at the same time. The butterflies in her stomach woke, and Lily cursed Malfoy in her head yet again. "I noticed anyway."

"Good for you," Lily whispered, instinctively lowering her voice to the same level as his. She fiercely clung to her annoyance at Smith. If she let it go, she would inevitably do something stupid, like twist around and kiss Malfoy's infuriating lips. She had already embarrassed herself enough this week.

"Smith's a disgrace to pureblood wizards everywhere," Malfoy said. She didn't have to see his face to know he was sneering. She could hear it in his voice. He possessed the singular talent of being able to sneer at people as if they were illegitimate lovechildren of the wannabe Dark Lord his father had put down like a rabid Crup.

"Too right," Crouch agreed.

"Costume jewelry? I can't possibly let that insult against our ancestry stand," Malfoy said. Yet again, he was bending words to suit his purposes. He was an unparalleled wordsmith. She would never tell him so, but it was a delight to watch him work. A heavy weight thumped against her chest. "It's Lucius from now on. Lucius, not Malfoy. Don't pretend to forget just to be contrary, Lily. I won't be amused."

He left. Mal—Lucius just walked off after putting an extravagant necklace on her. It had to be worth several hundred Galleons, given the braided gold chain that glistened in the sunlight. The pendant set the butterflies in her stomach free: a hunk of green garnet. It was stunning because it hadn't been changed to suit the jeweler's vision of what it could become if only it were cut, carved, or faceted.

She wasn't perfectly cut and polished. Lily resembled the garnet that matched her eyes and hung between her breasts. It was raw and beautiful and, for the first time, Lily wondered if she might have a real chance with Lucius.


Lily dragged her finger through the fog she had breathed against the window of the Hogwarts Express. The letter from her father, ordering her to come home for the two-week spring break, lay crumpled in her lap. Severus, of course, was still back at Hogwarts. He never went home unless he had no choice. Not that he had a home; all Severus had was an abusive household. Someday, that would change. Lily would make it change.

"Lily-Flower!" Potter called from the seat across from hers in the compartment. She ignored him, as she had the last eighteen times that he had spoken the unwanted pet name he had given her in third year.

"Evans, come on, have a heart," Black chided. "Give my buddy a chance and agree to go on a date with him over the break." She ignored him, too.

After they had followed her to a fourth compartment, she quit trying to get away from them. Lily had too much pride to hide from them in the girl's loo for the entire trip back to London. For all that she would've loved to hex them, she couldn't. She wasn't in school. Using her magic was forbidden.

That law, out of all of them, was the one she hated most.

Ever since the incident a little over a month ago, Potter kept trying to weasel his way into her affections. He was even more persistent than before. He offered to walk her to classes, carry her bag, and would not bloody stop sending her bouquets of intent. It seemed that he was dying to prove that he was a better pureblood than Malfoy, as if gifts of any quality and meaning could counterbalance how revolting he was personally.

"We can go wherever you want," Potter declared. He leaned toward her, but thankfully kept his hands to himself. That was one point of etiquette he never forgot when it came to her. It was the only smart choice he ever made in her presence. If he'd dared to lay hands on her without her permission, she would've taken great pleasure in ruining his reputation; she wouldn't even care if she destroyed his family in the process.

"James's much more handsome than Malfoy. You can't have been serious, Evans," Black said.

Lily snorted and continued adding different varieties of flowers to her fog painting. Lucius appealed to her more than James did. It wasn't even a purely physical comparison. If Lucius were disfigured, his personality would still make him more attractive. Though they hadn't spoken often when she was younger, Lily knew Lucius.

Oddly enough, Lily had fallen for Lucius because of Severus. In order for her and Severus to learn Occlumency, they practiced Legilimency on each other. Lily saw Severus's memories. She witnessed Lucius tutoring him in the common room, new pajamas (which just happened to be the Malfoy family colors) suddenly appearing on Severus's bed, sincere compliments, and unwavering support. From the moment he stepped out from under the Sorting Hat, Lucius took Severus under his protection. The other Slytherins didn't harass him.

How could she not be drawn to him?

"I wish you would take that off, Lily-Flower," Potter said. His voice was all knotted up with frustration and disgust.

Lily tightened her grip on the necklace Lucius gave her. She hadn't taken it off since he put it on her. It was a sign, from her perspective, that maybe her infatuation wasn't entirely one-sided. Anyone who wasn't ignorant about the Malfoy family knew that a pendant necklace was always the first gift a Malfoy offered in a courtship.

"You don't really think Malfoy loves you, do you?" Black's voice was so painfully condescending that Lily couldn't help but break her silence.

"No." For all that she lived in a world of magic, Lily was too old to play the game of make-believe. She and Petunia weren't princesses. Dad wasn't a knight in shining armor, and Mum wasn't her fairy godmother. She wasn't a child. Lily couldn't afford to live in an illusory world.

Platform Nine-And-Three-Quarters came into view. Lily breathed a sigh of relief. She was almost away from Potter and Black; just a few more minutes and she wouldn't have to see them again for a full two weeks. It would be paradise!

"Good. You had me worried for a minute," Black said. "Malfoy doesn't love you, Evans."

Every time Black spoke those words, it was harder for Lily to breathe. "I know."

The Hogwarts Express pulled into the station. She heard the wheels screeching in protest on the tracks as it came to a stop. A gout of steam blew past her window, obscuring her view of the waiting families. Hers wasn't out there, of course. No, her parents always waited for her on the Muggle side of the station. They insisted it would be easier for her to find them; Lily knew it was because they were uncomfortable with her new world, even years after it was actually 'new' to them.

"I love you, Lily-Flower."

Her head snapped around, because of all the things Potter had spouted at her over the years, that had certainly never been one of them. He stared at her with intent in his eyes. He believed that, Lily realized. Potter actually believed that he was in love with her. Those three words had never inspired terror in her before; they did now.

"I mean it," Potter said. He watched her like a predator eying prey it was about to devour. "I love you."

Lily stood up. It took everything she had, and she still failed to completely stifle the way her body shook in fear. "If your love is abuse, I'd rather have your hate, Potter," Lily whispered.

And as Potter reeled back as if she had just hit him with the Cruciatus Curse, Lily yanked open the compartment door and ran for the nearest exit. She collapsed back against the train, breathing so hard her lungs hurt. How dare he call that love! How dare he imply she love someone who never listened to her or respected her and humiliated her best friend!

A body leaned against the train, less than an inch away from her. Lily flinched away instinctively, thinking it was Black come to seek revenge, when a lock of flaxen hair brushed across her shoulder.

"What happened?" Lucius asked. His voice was ever so soft, yet ferociously hard.

Lily turned towards him and offered a curtsey that, for once, wasn't mocking. "I need a hug, Lucius." When he immediately opened his arms to her, Lily felt the tears come. She buried her face against his chest. She didn't care who saw them. If he didn't want people to see them together in public, Lucius never would've granted her request.

"Tell me what happened, Lily."

"Potter confessed to me."

Lucius huffed. "The idiot does that every day."

"He said . . ." Lily squeezed her eyes shut, which did nothing but send the tears spilling down her cheeks. She hated crying. It gave her a headache and her eyes felt sticky for hours afterwards. "He said he loves me."

"He doesn't know the meaning of the word," Lucius spat. "He had no business saying that to you!"

Lily sagged against him, and Lucius tightened his grip on her. He didn't complain she was crying on him. He didn't pat her head, as a silent demand she stop, and push her away. He didn't say 'females' or 'witches' in a derisive tone under his breath. Lucius held her. He was warm and safe; Lily never wanted to leave his arms.

"Aren't your parents coming for you?" Lucius asked, a considerable time later.

She chuckled then, with all the bitterness she normally locked away. "And expose themselves to a world of 'freaks' and 'unnaturalness' any more than they have to? Of course not." Lily looked up at him. "I was ordered home for the holidays. They expect me to meet them in Muggle London." Her voice was as defeated as she felt.

Why? Why did Muggle-borns even exist? Why would anyone ever give magic to a baby who would have to be raised by people who didn't possess or understand it themselves? She didn't belong with her birth family—not really. She hadn't since Professor McGonagall showed up and delivered her letter. That day destroyed her parents' beliefs that she had an overactive imagination, and Petunia was just jealous of her sister's new friend.

"So don't go back to them," Lucius said. He smiled down at her, sly as the Cheshire cat. "Spend the next two weeks with me at one of my family's cottages, Lily."

There would be consequences if she agreed. Oh, there would be so many consequences. But Lily was too weary of trying to please her parents to care. She didn't belong in the Muggle world; she hadn't belonged there since she was born. The only good thing it had ever given her was Severus Snape.

"I won't—"

Lily pressed her fingers to his lips; they felt softer than she had imagined them. Merlin, she wanted to kiss him. Why did he have to be so bloody tempting? "You're stronger than me physically, and you can use magic while I can't. But I know who you are, Lucius Malfoy." Her fingers swept over to brush along his cheek. "The only thing I have to fear is a broken heart." She smiled softly at him. "And that would be my own fault, not yours. I can't blame someone for not wanting my love when I'm the one who offers it, selfishly hoping I'll receive the same in return."

For the first time since she had viewed Severus's memories, Lily had trouble reading his face. "Your answer?" he asked.

She refused to let the disappointment overwhelm her. What had she expected, a love confession in return? Hadn't she bloody well told Black that she knew Malfoy didn't love her? Selfish, little fool, she chided herself. "Please take me away, Lucius," Lily said.

So he did.


Lily lay along a bench in the rose garden. Her hair was all tangled up with the lawn, and though the sun was high in the sky, her eyes remained open. It hurt to look at it. Yet, it was warm and burning—like her love for Lucius.

"Where are you now?" Lily sighed. Disappointment throbbed in her heart, but she wouldn't let it spread.

In the past week, she had only seen Lucius a handful of times. Though they were living together at his French cottage—which was a bloody castle, even if it was only three floors and fifty-five rooms—he was often gone. Oh, he was polite about it. A house-elf always came to inform her when he left on one errand or another. Lily tried not to dwell on the knowledge that he had missed over half the meals.

She rolled to her side and cut a rose from the nearest bush with the pruning sheers she abandoned an hour ago. It was the deepest of crimsons. Lily didn't even cry out when thorns pierced her fingers; she knew that beautiful things usually had a bite to them.

A flight of fancy overcame her. "Just this once," Lily breathed, remembering a game she hadn't played since she was a child. She plucked off the first petal. "He loves me." She kissed it, before letting it flutter to the ground. She removed another petal. "He loves me not." She kissed that one as well, because her love was not dependent on whether or not Lucius loved her in return.

And so her torturous game continued.

"He loves me. He loves me not. He loves me." Lily smiled so wide that her cheeks ached. "He loves me not. He loves me. He loves me not." Her lip wobbled, and she was grateful no one was there to see it. "He loves me." She paused, tracing her blood-stained fingers along the last petal. "He loves me not." Lily's hand shook as she removed that final, condemning petal.

Of course he didn't love her. He had invited her because he was too honorable to send her back to the Muggle world to wallow. His kindness and ingrained politeness were the reasons for her presence, nothing more. The necklace cried otherwise, but Lily was starting to wonder if that were nothing more than a delusional hope on her part.

It's just a stupid game. It doesn't mean anything. But even as she thought that, she couldn't fully convince herself of it. Maybe it was because her world was literally magical now. Maybe it was because of all the tales and traditions and customs she learned over the years. Something felt painfully final about the bare, thorn-covered stem in her hand.

A gasp ripped itself from her throat as a single petal grew back. It was white as snow.

A strangled sound from her left had Lily rolling over. Lucius stood there, his wand in hand, shaking. He was paler than she had ever seen him before. He looked like he was going to faint like a maiden in one of those unbelievable wizarding romances her dorm-mates giggled over.

"Lucius?" she asked. He must've eavesdropped! Why else would his wand be out? Why else would a single petal have grown after she declared the final one meant he didn't love her? Which, in turn, meant—Lily slammed that thought behind a section of Occlumency shields. False hope was not something she needed.

"You little fool," Lucius rasped. He stumbled forward a step, before toppling to his knees before her. "If I hadn't been here when you invoked that Ancient Rite of Blood Magic—"

She had no idea what he meant, though she gathered it had something to do with the flower. And since Lucius mentioned "Blood Magic," it probably referenced her thorn-torn fingers.

"Lucius, I—"

He pulled her off the bench and into his lap. Then Lucius wrapped his hands up in her hair and kissed her. Lily traced his cheeks as she fervently returned his kiss. And as her blood painted his skin, she trembled. Because with every sweep of his tongue, Lily felt his desire and love; it poured out of Lucius and into her.

Groaning, Lucius nipped her lip and then broke the kiss. His heavy breath washed across her face, sending chills down her spine. "I'll kill whoever taught you the Ancient Rites." He kissed the corner of her mouth. "Whoever it was misled you, or outright lied to you." He kissed her full on the lips. "If you performed that without me here to finish the rite and grow the final petal, Magic never would've allowed us to be together. Magic would've seen it as an utter rejection of you on my part." He hugged her more fiercely than he already was, as if he thought someone would rip her away.

"Lucius, I—"

Lily tumbled with him, as Lucius fell back against the lawn and stretched out. No one had ever taught her the Ancient Rites. It was the only part of pureblood culture she didn't have instruction in. The members of the Sacred Twenty-Eight usually kept their rituals to themselves, and she hadn't wanted to pry and be socially destroyed. Black would've been all-too-happy to teach her, but she wouldn't trust him as far as she could throw him. Because it wouldn't surprise her in the least if Black lied and twisted stuff around so that she accidentally got herself locked in an engagement with Potter.

"I got everything settled with your father and mine," Lucius said, as he gazed at her with soft eyes. He rubbed his hand up and down her back. "I was going to tell you tonight. The new moon is a great omen for success in new beginnings."

It didn't escape Lily's notice that Lucius said he would 'tell' her as opposed to 'ask' her. Given how honest and fervent her confession was in London, she didn't blame him. And if he was alluding to what she thought he was, then. . . . "What's settled?"

Lucius smirked, and then kissed her as if he never wanted to stop. She only tore her lips away when she felt something cold slide on her hand. On her left ring finger sat a ring that matched her necklace: a braided gold band with a smaller hunk of green garnet—uncut and unfaceted. "It seems redundant now, seeing as you just proposed to me more passionately than what I had planned." He buried his head in the crook of her neck and kissed her jumping pulse. "I wasn't going to do what Potter did to you, Lily. I wasn't going to speak my heart without being able to fulfill all the unspoken promises that implied." He met her gaze, his eyes a darker pewter than when she had passed him in the courtyard after loudly declaring she would let him own her.

"Lucius?" Oh, how desperately she wanted to believe what he was implying.

And with a grin on his face, Lucius purred, "Why, Lily, for all that I can be a smarmy bastard, I'm a class act. Everything that I own is always in pristine condition. My family keeps artifacts as heirlooms, instead of getting rid of something valuable just because something new and shiny comes along." He placed the gentlest of kisses on her lips. "You gave yourself to me, and I'll never let go. But I swear I'll keep you around for more than the novelty of knowing I'm the only one to ever have you. And since you're wholly mine, well, I can't let anyone else take what's mine, can I?"

Lily laughed, then, robust and as vibrant as her hair. She felt alive. Lily peppered his face with kisses. Then she smirked in perfect mimicry of him, curled her hand around his throat, and said, "I've always wanted a pet pureblood. I hear the going price for one is love that never fades." His lips were too tempting for her to ignore them any longer, and Lucius kissed the thoughts right out of her head for a long time. "I'm willing to pay that price. Can I keep you?" she eventually breathed against his flushed cheek.

Lucius didn't say anything. He didn't need to. His eyes answered for him; they were both willingly bound in chains of love offered and received—neither ever wanted to be set free.