What the actual fuck.

Never in a million years did Wade Wilson, a.k.a. Deadpool, a.k.a. the guy who'd been antagonizing Your Friendly Neighborhood Spider-man for forever, expect Peter Fucking Parker to kiss him in a dark alley. Did his stupid flirting actually win over the one guy he'd been pining after for years?

It has to be a dream. Peter has never indicated that he even enjoyed Wade's company, let alone have feelings for him. This boy who despised him so greatly would never kiss Wade, but Peter's lips are soft and fit perfectly upon his. The kid even has his eyes closed.

Holy fuck. Peter Parker initiated a kiss with Wade Wilson.

Realizing he just spent way too long thinking about what is happening, Wade responds to the pressure, just before Peter is about to pull away. His eyes close and his arms sneak around Peter's back, pulling him as close as humanly possible. Wade feels Peter's hand cup the back of his neck and suddenly time stands still. There is only Wade and Peter and the warmth that is radiating from their entangled bodies. Nothing else in the world matters and Wade makes a vow that from now on, wherever Peter goes, he will too.

Peter utters a small sound that makes Wade go rock hard and he knows that if they continue, he will have no control of what happens. He pulls back as gently as he can and rests his forehead against Peter's. Because of his abilities, Wade is never out of breath, but his breathing is ragged now, matching Peter's exactly. He tries to speak, but no words come. The infamous Merc with a Mouth is speechless.

Peter's hands drop to Wade's shoulders, then down his arms to rest on his hips. Wade knows that he should loosen his hold but what if letting Peter go makes him disappear? As if reading his mind, Peter speaks.

"Wade?" He's quiet, almost whispering.

"Hm?" Wade can't open his eyes. Peter's face could say anything, including a lot of things Wade really, really, really didn't want it to say.

"I'm not going anywhere," he breathes, sending a shiver down Wade's spine. He pulls back to look at Peter, a very flushed and ruffled Peter. The sight makes a place below Wade's belt tingle, reminding him just how thin his suit is.

"Are you okay?" Wade asks after clearing his throat. It is a stupid question but they're the only words that come to mind. Peter grins and Wade is pretty sure it's the most dazzling thing he's ever seen.

"Yeah. That went a lot better than I thought it was going to," he says and looks at Wade with a happiness he had never seen from the kid and Wade knows that he will do anything for Peter to keep it.

"Same here, I never thought that this would happen," he says, realizing that the shakiness he feels is his heart racing.

"Wait, but you've been flirting with me since you met me," Peter's eyes are full of confusion and Wade kisses his nose.

"I didn't think I'd actually get anywhere. You didn't exactly like me," Wade chuckles but Peter looks ashamed.

"I'm sorry Wade. Since you saved my ass a couple weeks ago I've-"

"There's a couple other things I want to do to your ass," Wade interrupts and Peter smacks his arm as a blush creeps over his cheeks.

"Shut up, I'm trying to apologize," his lip wavers and it looks like he's going to pout but Wade kisses him again. It's soft and quick and it makes Peter smile.

"It's okay, baby boy, I understand that sometimes I can be a real handful," Wade says.

"Not to mention really annoying," Peter mumbles playfully and Wade snorts.

"You're going to pay for that, Spidey," he says, tightening his hold but Peter slips away, his mask already on.

"You gotta catch me first, Deadpool!" Peter calls, already shooting webbing up the side of the building.

"Well that's easy," Wade says, teleporting to stand next to Peter who is perched on the edge of a roof. Startled, he begins to fall but Wade catches him.

"Okay, how about this then: last one to my apartment has to buy the other dinner?" Peter proposes, finding his balance and preparing to swing to another building.

"But I don't know where your apartment is," Wade protests.

"That's why I'll win!" Peter says as he falls off the roof and reappears swinging into the street.

"You're on Spidey!" Wade teleports to where Peter just landed, "But just so you know, if I'm buying, we're getting Mexican."