Note: Yeah, you read that right—I tagged this as humor. This is possibly the first and last time I've ever written something that I can tag as pure humor, with no angst or hurt/comfort involved, so enjoy it while it lasts. Just so that I could say that I did it once. Now I can cross that off my bucket list lol

"Ha! I got seven now," Natsu crowed triumphantly as another dark guild mage threw in the towel and dropped to the ground unconscious. "Beat that, ice princess!"

Gray rolled his eyes. What an idiot. "I've already taken out seven, ash for brains. What took you so long to catch up?"

"What?" Natsu leveled an impressive scowl at him. "Impossible. You couldn't have already taken out that many with your wimpy magic."

"Wanna count them?" Gray shot back, gazing around at the carnage with no little satisfaction.

This dark guild really hadn't known what was coming. Their cockiness had lasted all of about thirty seconds, until Erza had gotten tired of their posturing and made short work of two of them. After that, it had been a free-for-all. Erza had wasted no time in fighting her way through the ranks of the enemy, a whirlwind of swords and malice that only the most brave or foolhardy tried to stand their ground against. Lucy had also managed to take out a few enemy mages by herself, although her greatest challenge seemed to be keeping her spirits in line since the dark mages themselves didn't pose much of a threat.

As for Gray and Natsu… Well, as with most things involving Gray and Natsu, it had quickly turned into something of a competition. A competition that Gray fully intended to win.

He spun in a circle, looking for any dark mages left standing. Ties were unacceptable, and he needed to take out another enemy in order to really defeat Natsu. Lucy was doing fine against her opponent and Erza looked like she had the other two under control, but surely there must be someone left.

His eye caught on a wide-eyed man lurking in the shadows, and he clicked his tongue in disapproval. No leader of any guild should sit back and watch while his guild was decimated. How truly pathetic.

"I call dibs on that guy," Gray announced, starting toward his hapless victim.

"What? No! He's mine!" Natsu protested, darting forward as well.

The two rivals halted their advance to glare at each other.

"I saw him first," Gray said with a scowl.

"And? I'm gonna take him out anyway."

"Oh no you aren't!"

The object of their discussion was looking back and forth between the bickering duo uncertainly, but neither paid him any mind until he decided to seize his chance to attack them while they were distracted. The wind spell he sent their way wasn't terribly strong, and Gray easily threw up a shield of ice to deflect the sudden twister before it got anywhere near him or Natsu. Or Happy, who was hovering in the air behind them with a long-suffering expression plastered on his face.

"I made first contact," Gray said smugly. "He's mine."

"You didn't actually hit him," Natsu disagreed. "Just his magic. He's still fair game."

The dark mage was looking more and more disconcerted as the surreal argument dragged on, and began stealthily creeping backward, trying to disappear into the shadows of the alley behind him. Gray froze his feet to the ground.

"There, I made first contact with him."

"It doesn't count!"

"Sure it does. Looks like I'm going to win."

"Oh no you aren't!"

"Will someone please just put him out of his misery already?" Happy asked, whiskers twitching in exasperation. "I'm hungry and I want to eat a nice big fish, which can't happen until you finish this guy off so we can get going already. You'd better hurry it up, because Erza's almost done. If one of you doesn't take care of him soon then she's going to come do it for you."

Happy's appeal for food didn't really bother anyone—it wasn't like he would keel over if he had to wait an extra few minutes before getting his paws on some fish—but the warning about Erza certainly caught the boys' attention. They both looked over at the requip mage automatically, quickly ascertained that she was indeed finishing up against her opponents, and simultaneously came to the realization that Happy was right and she would come spoil their competition if they didn't wrap things up quickly.

"I got it!"

"He's mine!"

They both started forward in unison, calling forth their magic at the same exact time. Gray had spent so much time fighting against and alongside Natsu over the years that he knew exactly what his friend would do without even thinking about it. He could sense it: the slight shifting of weight onto Natsu's right foot as it slipped a half-inch in front of his left, the tensing of his muscles as he began to lift his arms, his chest puffing out as he prepared to suck in a huge lungful of air. Oh yes, Gray knew all the little cues that led up to Natsu overdoing things with a roar, as per usual.

As Gray subconsciously mirrored Natsu's stance and automatically adjusted to accommodate the dragon slayer's coming attack, he took a split second to reflect that it was rather amazing how in tune with each other they could be, even while competing. Then the thought skittered away as quickly as it had come, his mind firmly refocusing on the present.

It wasn't like he really had anything in common with this idiot anyway. What was amazing was how utterly stupid some of his own thoughts were sometimes.

Gray was still moving, his hands flying through the precise motions of his molding. He chose to just use simple ice lances this time, because they were quick and uncomplicated, and he needed something he could make in just a heartbeat if he wanted to be sure to beat Natsu's roar and score the win.

"Ice-make: lance!"

"Fire dragon's roar!"

The attacks were launched at precisely the same moment. And then everything went to hell.

Gray gaped in disbelief as a huge tsunami of water crashed down over the dark mage, cutting off his scream as it flooded his mouth and slammed him back into the building behind him. There was stunned silence for nearly an entire minute, before Gray turned on Natsu, eyes flashing with fury.

"What the hell did you do?" he demanded.

"What did I do?" Natsu asked indignantly, his shock quickly morphing into irritated anger. "What did you do?"

"You melted my ice! How dare you?"

No one messed with Gray's magic. Not anyone who lived to tell the tale, anyway. Natsu had some nerve, screwing with Gray's ice like that. Although Gray was also curious about how he had done it, given that the ice was magicked and shouldn't be able to be melted that easily. Natsu had never managed to melt it like that before, and Gray had no idea how he had managed it now.

And oh, his pride was smarting. Natsu shouldn't have been able to do that.

"Your ice?" Natsu asked, throwing his hands into the air. "Who cares about your ice? What did you do to my fire? It's totally gone!"

"Yeah, well it melted my ice first."

"Ha, only because your magic is pathetic and mine is stronger."

"Excuse me?" Gray drew himself up to his full height and glowered at his rival. "Whose magic totally disappeared? Oh right, that would be yours."

"Hey! I–"

Natsu broke off, and both mages automatically turned back to where the leader of the dark guild had pulled himself to his feet and was attempting to stagger away.

"He's mine!"

"He's mine!"

Once again, their combined attacks somehow managed to produce only a jet of water that blasted the unlucky dark mage to the ground, where he lay in a groaning heap.

"Would you stop doing that?" Gray cried, rounding on Natsu again. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Hey, I'm pretty sure you're the one who's messing things up."

This was an entirely unacceptable state of affairs. Gray quickly let his hands fly through the familiar motions, and was relieved to see ice spring to his fingertips before he let it dissipate. Okay, so it wasn't like his magic was totally screwed up then.

"Well, it looks like my magic still works perfectly fine unless you go messing with it," he told the dragon slayer, eyes narrowing.

"Mine too," Natsu retorted, summoning a tongue of flame in his hand to illustrate his point.

What a mess. On the other hand, as horrible as this problem was, there was still a more pressing concern.

"Well, let me finish this guy off and then we can figure out what the hell you're doing to mess up our magic," Gray said.

"Uh-uh, no way are you going to win!"

"I surrender!" the dark mage squeaked, eyes widening as he tried to crawl backward, away from the Fairy Tail mages.

"You can't surrender," Natsu said, rolling his eyes. "You're our tiebreaker. One of us has to take you out."

"You know, he's already down for the count," Happy interrupted. "Just leave him be."

"But it was that weird messed-up magic," Gray explained, wondering how Happy could be so dense. "So we both kind of did it. That's still a tie, and ties are unacceptable."

"I'm sorry!" the dark guild's leader wailed, curling into a trembling ball as he waited for his impending doom. "Have mercy!"

Neither Gray nor Natsu had any interest in listening to his pleas, but their attacks were abruptly aborted when Erza came up behind them and whacked them both over the head.

"He's finished," she said, exasperated. "Stop that already."

"But then it will be a tie!" Natsu protested. "That weird watery thing doesn't count for either of us."

Erza's annoyed expression immediately morphed into one of curiosity. "Yes, I'd noticed that. What in the world happened with your magic?"

"He melted my ice!"

"He did something to my fire!"

"I've never seen you do anything like that before, and you've been fighting each other for years," Erza said, shaking her head. "So what happened this time?"

"How am I supposed to know?" Gray grumbled, crossing his arms as he scowled over at Natsu. "Our magics still work fine on their own, but it's like they're interfering with each other or something."

"I'm not so sure," Lucy disagreed, studying the boys with an almost awestruck expression. "I don't think your magics were interfering with each other at all. Did you just… Did you just do a unison raid?"

Gray stared at her, wondering if she had suddenly gone insane. A unison raid? Ha, that was ridiculous. As if he'd do a unison raid with someone he couldn't even get along with.

"Of course not," he snapped. "Why would I do a unison raid with him? His magic is just messing with mine."

"Besides, our magics are basically opposites," Natsu added. "They're not compatible at all."

"I don't know… Fire plus ice could equal water," Erza mused. "I'd expect to see a lot more steam if your magics were actually clashing rather than combining into something new. And even if your magics don't seem compatible, you two are so in tune with each other that maybe they overcame that. Although this is the first time that I've seen someone do a unison raid on accident. That's awfully impressive, considering how difficult and rare they are."

"It's not a unison raid," Gray repeated, throwing his hands up in frustration.

"I think it is, though," Lucy said, shaking her head. "I've done one before with Juvia, and it kind of looked and felt like the same thing. Like you can set aside your differences for a few moments and come together so seamlessly that your magics can blend together into one, no matter how dissimilar they are from each other."

Gray snorted. "I'm not 'in tune' with him. We were competing, if you hadn't noticed. We weren't working together."

"Well… You kind of were," Happy pointed out. "Even when you're competing against each other, you're working toward similar goals at the same time. Plus, you guys know each other so well that your fighting almost looks choreographed at this point."

"Nah, the ice block's right," Natsu said. "That couldn't be a unison raid. For one, I don't want to do a unison raid with him. And two, if we did do one, then it would be way cooler than some lame water thing."

Gray nodded his agreement. Not that he would ever actually want to work with Natsu, but if he did then their unison raid would be something cool and powerful. Water was totally lame.

"But this was only an accidental one," Lucy said. She grinned suddenly, her eyes lighting up as she considered the possibilities. "Think how amazing it could be if you actually tried to work together! Maybe you could make super cool ice dragons that breathe fire, or something! Seriously, if you can already do this much without even trying, imagine how powerful you could be if you actually worked at it!"

Gray shuddered involuntarily at the thought of working with his rival on something like that. Out of the corner of his eye, he caught Natsu's shiver of disgust as well, and turned to look at him. The two friends stared at each other for a moment, and then Natsu smirked.

Gray could already tell what the dragon slayer was going to say before the words even left his mouth. He could see it in the curl of Natsu's lips, the spark in his eyes, the slight shifting of weight to promote a better offensive stance.

"Since we ended up with a tie and we still have to decide who wins and who it is that's messing up our magic, I guess there's only one way to settle this, huh?"

Gray grinned, slipping into a battle stance and raising his hands in preparation to mold. "You're on, squinty eyes."

"They…did a unison raid…on accident?" Makarov asked slowly, eyeing the red-haired girl sitting across from him in disbelief.

"Yes," Erza confirmed. "I've never seen anything like it."

"On accident," he repeated, leaning back in his chair and shaking his head. "Only those two could accidentally perform such a difficult technique. I still can't believe that they did it with each other, out of everyone. Aside from the fact that their magics should be totally incompatible, they can't get along with each other to save their lives."

Erza smiled brightly. "It just goes to show that they are good friends, even though they always deny it."

Makarov wasn't sure he'd go that far, but he decided to let Erza have her small victory for now. She certainly seemed pleased as punch with this newest development. But even still, there was one tiny thing left to clear up.

"And why did I get a summons from the Council?"

Erza's grin immediately fell away. "What?" she asked apprehensively, her eyes taking on a shifty look.

Makarov eyed her suspiciously, before picking up a piece of paper in front of him and leaning over his desk to hand it to the requip mage. He watched in silence as she read the missive. It was just a few short lines, but each word dripped with thinly veiled hostility.

Whatever Gray and Natsu had done must have been a real doozy, because the summons had shown up before the team had even arrived back at the guild. The Council had been in such a hurry to send it that it gave basically zero details, aside from an order for Makarov and the troublemaking boys to appear before them within the next week and a warning to expect to be paying reparations. Reparations for what, exactly, was what Makarov wanted to know.

Erza clearly had some idea, because although she looked vaguely uncomfortable, she didn't appear as surprised as she should. Clearing her throat awkwardly, she handed the letter back to Makarov.

"Well, you see, Gray and Natsu weren't exactly…happy about all this."

Makarov sighed in annoyance. "They fought? How many buildings did they destroy this time?"

"Uh… Yeah, about that…" Erza hesitated for a moment, before shrugging and plowing on. "Well, they were trying to fight each other afterwards, but the thing is… Well, their magic was still on the same wavelength, and every time they came into contact with each other, they basically combined into mini unison raids."

"…What?"

"Yeah, it was really weird."

"So they couldn't fight each other?" Makarov asked with a frown, trying to figure out where Erza was going with this.

"Well, you know how they say that insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results?"

He closed his eyes. "What did they do?"

"They switched to fists for a little while, but they couldn't give up on the magic because they were frustrated that it didn't seem to be working right," Erza explained. "So they ended up flooding the entire town. And the surrounding area. And like three other nearby towns."

Makarov's eyes snapped open and he stared at Erza in bewilderment. "Flooded?"

The redhead smirked. "Apparently fire plus ice equals water."

"Water? They flooded…?"

"Everything," Erza confirmed with a sharp smile.

Makarov stared at her. He imagined how much damage would have been done by such a spectacular flood and how many homes would have been lost. He thought about what a pain in the neck the Council was going to be about this. He grimaced at how much the guild was going to owe in damages.

And then he imagined what Gray and Natsu's faces must have looked like when they saw the unexpected flood. For good measure, he also imagined the Council's faces upon hearing the news.

He burst out laughing. "Screw the summons. This is totally worth it."

Note: Yes, the jab at Juvia was totally necessary. Sorry not sorry :)

emmahoshi: Ha, yeah, it's so short because it's basically pure humor. My other stories tend to have more substance, which is why they run longer :) Lol, Gray and Natsu are just goofballs, and their priorities can be a little skewed. And yeah, I've got nothing against water except for where Juvia is concerned XD I didn't set out to bash her, but sometimes I don't have enough self-restraint to resist the urge to insert a subtle-not-so-subtle jab or two :3