4.

Maura had been sure that the sexiest form of Jane Rizzoli, was the one who had her heart completely set on winning. When they were four or five days into a case, so close that they could taste it, something about the detective would shift; her breathing would change. The way she slept at night would change. She would hold herself like some great jungle cat, just on the precipice of striking.

Maura thought that this was the sexiest her girlfriend would ever be.

But that was before she met Jane, the mother.

Sylvie Margot is the first to arrive, forty four days after Chloe shows up at Jane and Maura's house. It is a drizzly day in early June, and Maura just barely hears the rumble of Chloe's beat up Volvo as it pulls to the curb outside.

Jane has been pretending to watch TV in the sitting room, and she hears it too. They meet in the hall by the front door, and for a moment they just look at each other.

"You ready?" Jane asks.

"No," Maura says honestly. This has been her answer for the last forty four days.

Jane no longer looks hurt or scared by the response. "Are you sure you want this? With me?" She asks, they way she has been for the last month at least.

"Yes," Maura says, just as firmly. "I love you."

Jane smiles and pulls the door open. "I love you too."

It is just possible to make out the top of Sylvie's dark head in the back of the volvo. Chloe stands by the back window and speaks through the glass, coaxing.

Jane rolls her eyes.

"She should be in a booster," Maura murmurs, lifting a hand in greeting as Chloe turns to them.

"We have one," Jane says. She doesn't wave.

She hasn't warmed to Chloe, not even in the last two weeks of preparation, when they spoke on the phone at least every other day.

Chloe finally gives up on trying to get the little girl to let herself out of the car, and pulls the back door open herself.

"Sylvie," she says cheerfully, "You remember Doctor Isles and Detective Rizzoli? Remember a few weeks ago when they came to invite you and your sister to live with them?"

Sylvie slides out of the car and stands on the sidewalk. She doesn't look at any of them.

She is small for eight, with a delicate bone structure, like that of a bird. She is holding what looks to be a quilt square in both hands.

Her socks do not match.

"Do you want to say hello?" Chloe prompts, still in her overly cheerful voice.

Jane shoots her a glare. "It's okay," she says. She takes a step forward, and Sylvie takes a half step backwards. Jane squats, her immediate instinct to be less imposing.

"My name is Jane. Forget all that detective stuff." She points over her shoulder. "And that's Maura, Not doctor." She pauses, inspecting the little figure before her. "But neither of us mind if you don't say anything at all."

She stands and looks at Chloe, who still is not able to be in Jane's presence without flushing.

"She has bags?" Jane asks curtly.

Chloe looks for a moment like she doesn't speak English, before jumping into action. "Yes! She has one. I'll grab it."

Jane rolls her eyes at Maura, who hides a superior smile and gestures Sylvie towards the door. "Come on, darling," she says. "Let's get out of the rain."

"My sister was with me," Sylvie says as they head up the walk. She has the softest whisper of a voice, and Maura has to replay the words in her head to make sure she's heard them all.

"Your sister?" She asks gently.

Sylvie glances up at her, and then away. "My sister, Gemma," she says. "When I saw you. My sister was with me."

Maura reaches for Sylvie automatically as they climb the steps to the house. Her hand between the little girl's shoulder blades feels huge.

"That's right, honey," she says, pushing the door inwards. "And she'll be here again, really soon. I promise."

.

And so Maura inadvertently endears herself to Sylvie, when Gemma Margot arrives eight days later, thereby keeping Maura's promise. Sylvie is sitting at the kitchen table, tracing the lines on a page of her coloring book, whispering, "blue, blue, blue," when the telltale sound of the Volvo floats in through the open window.

Jane is sitting next to her, reading a case file, and Maura is filling in the Friday crossword, and when she looks up at the sound, it is to see Sylvie staring at her with wide awed eyes.

Jane grins, closing her folder. "I think that sound means that somebody's sister is here," she says playfully.

Sylvie looks at her, and then back at Maura. "Whose?" she whispers, concern flashing across her features.

Jane raises her eyebrows, but Maura doesn't miss a beat. "Yours," she says, standing. "Let's go see!"

They stand, and head to the doorway, and Sylvie lets go a little cry of delight when she sees Gemma emerging from the back of Chloe's car. She looks up at Maura for a nod of approval before jumping down the steps and sprinting towards her sister. Gemma is tall for 13, willowy and muscled. Chloe steps up to her and moves to reach in for her bag, and Gemma blocks her immediately.

"I got it," she snarls, and she throws Chloe such a Jane-like glare, that the social worker takes a couple steps back.

Jane chuckles. "Impressive," she murmurs to Maura. "I like her already."

Sylvie locks her older sister in a ferocious hug. "Gem," she whispers through her smile. "Gem! You came!"

"Of course I came, I said I would," she says. She kisses the top of Sylvie's head, and Maura thinks it's the way a parent might do so. She wonders again what she's gotten herself into.

"Hi Gemma," Jane says, and if she's nervous, there's no trace of it in her tone or her easy smile. "It's really great to see you again."

Gemma removes one arm from around her sister, and glares at Jane. "Whatever," she says.

It makes Maura flinch, but Jane nods pleasantly as though Gemma has responded in kind.

"Let's get you guys inside." Jane gestures towards the house, and as they start back up the sidewalk, Sylvie reaches tentatively for Maura's hand, but just as she's about to take it, Gemma reaches out and pulls Sylvie away by the shoulder.

"I'm here now," she says, with a look at Maura that is pointed enough to pierce her heart.

"Maura got me some coloring books," Sylvie says. "But I was waiting for you to do them. Planned the colors though."

Gemma smiles at her sister. "That's real good, Vivi," she says softly.

Sylvie glances at Maura, who smiles. "I missed you," she says quietly, as Jane pulls the door open for them. This makes Gemma's smile disappear. She glowers at Jane and guides her sister into the hallway, as though it is she who has been with them for eight days, and not Sylvie.

"You can't separate us," She says to Jane, each word wielded like a weapon. "I won't let anyone separate us again."

Jane puts her hand in the small of Maura's back as she steps through the door. "Neither will I, kid," she says simply. "Sylvie, you want to show Gemma the sheets and things you picked out for her at the store?"

Sylvie nods excitedly and tugs at Gemma's hand until the older girl lets herself be led towards the stairs.

"They're like the McNallys," Jane and Maura hear Sylvie say as they climb. "They're real nice, just like them."

Whatever Gemma says in return is unintelligible, but her tone is unmistakable: skepticism, pure and simple.

Jane kisses Maura just below the ear. "I love you," she whispers.

Maura smiles.

…

The girls reappear just before dinner. Sylvie waves at Maura and then at Jane from the threshold of the kitchen, but she doesn't approach, and Maura can't help but feel as though all of their progress over the last eight days has been a waste.

Jane has just finished setting the table, and Maura brings out the last dish as Gemma helps Sylvie into her seat at the table.

"How did you like your room?" Maura asks, she reaches for a spoon to start putting potatoes onto Sylvie's plate, but Jane's hand on her knee stops her.

Jane serves herself and then passes the bowl to Gemma, who serves Sylvie first, then herself.

"Gemma?" Jane prompts softly.

"Sylvie's going to sleep in my room with me," Gemma says argumentatively.

Jane nods, "That's fine," she says.

Gemma scowls. "I wasn't asking," she says, and this time, when Jane responds, there is just the tiniest bit of edge to her voice.

"And I wasn't fighting," she says slowly. "You and your sister are welcome to sleep anywhere in this house that you feel safe and comfortable."

Maura sees Sylvie looking back and forth between Jane and Gemma, her lower lip starting to tremble.

"It's alright, sweetheart," she says gently. "No one's upset."

But it is too late. Sylvie picks up her plate of food and slides down from her chair, disappearing from the kitchen with a sniff.

Gemma spares Jane and Maura one deep look of disgust, before pushing her chair back and hurrying after her.

Jane sighs, picking up her dinner plate.

Maura touches her on the arm before doing the same. "We anticipated this," she murmurs.

"I know," Jane takes a last swig of her drink. "But three days in a row at the table had me feeling hopeful."

They find Sylvie in her normal spot, behind the TV stand, pushed all the way back into the corner. Gemma is crouched in front of her, speaking quietly, though she falls silent when Jane and Maura settle on the floor too.

"What are you doing?" she asked incredulously.

"Eating," Jane says, picking up a forkful of broccoli, looking at Gemma as if this is obvious.

"Sylvie doesn't want you here," Gemma hisses, and this time, Maura cannot help herself. The words leave her before she can check them.

"Everyone in this house gets a voice, Gemma," she says firmly.

Gemma looks outraged, but she turns to her sister, eyebrows up. "Tell them," she hisses, and her voice shakes with the effort of keeping it quiet.

Sylvie looks down at her plate, and Maura is just about to say that this is negating the whole idea of a 'safe space,' when Sylvie says, just above a whisper, "I do...want them to stay, Gemmie."

Maura looks, wide eyed, at Jane, but the detective's face is impassive. If she wants to jump and shout with joy the way Maura does, she is doing a really good job of hiding it.

Sylvie smiles shyly at Maura. "Will you tell a story, like last time?" she asks slowly.

Maura is so excited that she's been given permission to stay, that for a moment she doesn't fully understand the question. Had she told a story last evening at dinner? It seems like ages ago.

But Jane grins at her. "Yeah," she says with a little laugh, "tell us more fascinating facts about bacteria." She nudges Gemma gently with her elbow. "Go get your plate," she urges.

Gemma stares at Jane for a long moment. "Do you know why she's hiding?" she asks finally, still in her argumentative voice. "Do you even know anything?"

Jane shrugs her shoulders. "Does it matter?" she asks Gemma. She turns to Sylvie. "You can tell us," She says reassuringly. "You can tell us anything you like. But as long as you're safe and happy, we won't press you."

Maura wants to kiss her. She does, right where Jane's dimple is when she smiles. Both girls watch with dumbfounded expressions.

"Go get your plate," Jane says to Gemma with a nod. "Maura makes science sound like music."

Gemma gets up and walks slowly from the room. It takes her almost three minutes to return to the living room, and when she does, she seems startled that they are all still waiting for her, food untouched.

She plops cross-legged between Maura and Jane, and picks up a piece of bread. "K," she says after a moment. "I'm back."

Maura smiles at Jane. "Okay," she says. "Well yesterday, I was doing some follow up research at work…"

…

5.

Maura keeps a record of everything, writing it all in a spiral notebook she keeps by the side of her bed. She has a fear that she will forget the important things. That if one of the girl's asks her about something from their past, something that the four of them have done, she won't have the answer right there for them.

She doesn't want them to ever be uncertain again.

Jane kisses her, and pulls the covers around them at night, and tells her that uncertainty is part of being an adolescent.

Maura shakes her head, as much as she can with it pressed against Jane's shoulder. "You don't understand," she whispers. She's not angry, she's just stating the facts.

Jane knows loss, and fear, and pain that Maura cannot comprehend. But she doesn't know about this.

Jane is still for long enough that Maura thinks she's fallen asleep. Then she kisses the crown of Maura's head again. "You're right," she answers. "I don't." She squeezes Maura around the middle. "You'll help me," she says. "You'll help us."

Maura feels confident with Jane there. Even in the darkness.

...

She discovers that Sylvie needs glasses.

The little girl loves stories. She wants Maura to read to her during almost all of their downtime. Their trip to the bookstore for new material becomes an almost weekly routine, and as July rolls around, Gemma opts to stay home, letting the two of them go book shopping by themselves. Maura hugs Gemma good-bye, and she thinks maybe this time the hug Gemma returns is a little less grudging than usual.

She lets Sylvie lead the way in the store on each visit, praising every decision no matter what it is. But she notices the little girl squinting at the signs that point the way to the children's department, and she holds her back for a moment, kneeling so they are at eye-level.

"Sylvie," she says, watching the little girl bite her lip nervously. "Can you read these signs, sweetheart?" she points at the one above them.

Sylvie shuffles her feet. Maura sees her lip quiver, and resists the urge to pull her into a hug. She does what Jane has told her is best. "You can tell me the truth," she says. "I promise that I won't be upset. Just…take a couple deep breaths and tell me."

Sylvie takes two shuddering breaths that break Maura's heart. "I could read it, Mo," she says apologetically. "If it was closer to me."

Maura nods. "Okay," she says, smiling brightly. "Let's go pick out some books, hmm?"

Sylvie lights up as Maura stands. She takes the doctor's hand without invitation. "Really?" she asks excitedly. "I can still have one?"

Maura nods. "Yes," she says. "And when we get home, we'll talk to Jane about getting you some glasses."

Sylvie swings Maura's hand in both of her own, smiling up at her. "You know," she says happily, "Your and Jay's house is my favorite of all the houses. Even the McNallys."

Maura remembers the name from the file. She remembers that it had been about to become a permanent home for the girls until a drunk driver had taken the husband, and the grieving wife had found out that she was pregnant with the child they'd never expected to have.

Their next string of homes had not been as kind to them.

Maura, with a little difficulty, manages to only nod at this information. "I'm glad," she says. "You and Gemma can stay with us for as long as you want. Jane and I both love you very much."

They have both said it before, during bedtime routines and school drop-offs.

Jane and I love you, we'll be here at 3:30.

Good-night, you two. Maura and I love you lots and lots. We'll see you in the morning unless you need anything.

But this time, Sylvie stops walking, both of her hands still holding onto Maura's. She looks up into the doctor's face, her expression solemn.

"I love you too, Maura," she says seriously. "Is that okay?"

.

They come home hours later, laden with shopping bags, and Sylvie's worried expression fades to relief and then delight when Jane and Gemma meet them in the front hall and the former bursts into laughter.

"Did you leave anything in the store?" She asks, still smiling, hugging Sylvie and kissing Maura on the cheek.

"We got things for you, Gemma!" Sylvie pipes up. "And something for you too, Jane!"

Jane looks extra excited for Sylvie's benefit. "That is super thoughtful of you, babe! Thank you!"

Sylvie runs off towards the stairs. "C'mon, Gem!" she cries excitedly. "Come see all the new stuff! I got some things for you too!"

Gemma starts after her sister, but she stops at the bottom of the staircase and turns back to face Jane and Maura.

"Um...thanks," she says to Maura's chin. "That was, um, really nice."

Maura beams at her, and Gemma smiles back.

"Gemma," Sylvie calls from upstairs, and the teenager rolls her eyes, and turns away for good.

Jane snakes an arm around Maura's waist. "That was, um, like, really nice," she says, mocking Gemma.

Maura laughs, and then finds there are tears in her eyes. "I'm taking her to get glasses tomorrow," Maura says thickly. "And she said she loves me."

…

Gemma finds them a month later, after Sylvie's gone down to bed. She slides into the sitting room, dressed for bed, hair in a loose ponytail.

"Hey," she says to her feet.

Jane puts aside her work and sits up. "Hey, Gemma," she says with a smile. "What's up?"

Gemma bites her lip, then shoves her hands in the pockets of her sweats. "So...I'm making this dumb model for school," she mumbles, "And like...I keep telling Sylvie not to touch it, but she doesn't listen."

Maura opens her mouth to reply, but Jane shakes her head discreetly.

"My little brother once kicked over a model of the space station that I'd been working on for like three weeks. I almost killed him," she says.

Gemma nods vigorously at this anecdote. "Yeah!" she says with more enthusiasm than Maura's ever seen. She looks at Maura, and then at Jane as though she is really seeing them for the first time. As though she is just now realizing that the people she's met over the last six weeks are Jane's family and friends.

"Uh...which one?" she asks after a moment, taking a step a little closer.

"Tommy," Jane says, easily. "My mom made me share a room with him until I was like, sixteen."

Gemma makes a face that makes Jane chuckle. "Yeah," she says, nodding. "It was rough."

Maura watches Gemma consider Jane for a long time, clearly trying to decide something. Jane lets the silence sit, seemingly unbothered.

"So...the room that Sylvie stayed in, before I got here," Gemma begins, and Maura has to work hard to hold herself still when she realizes the direction this conversation is taking. "That's like...hers right?"

"Yeah," Jane says. "There's a guest house in case anyone comes to stay, so you two get your own rooms." She snorts at this. "Luckies."

Gemma grins, but it fades after a moment. "Whenever we were together, we never slept alone," she says quietly. And now she comes all the way into the room, sitting down when Jane gestures to the ottoman. "I always promised her. It was like...a pact we made."

"Yeah," Jane says. "I get that. It's hard to take care of someone when you're not sure what's going to happen. And you take really good care of her, Gemma. That's clear."

"You took care of your brothers a lot?"

Jane smiles. "Yeah. And sometimes I just wanted to…" Jane makes a vague gesture with her hands, and Maura sees Gemma watching them. Looking at the scars on the back of her hands.

"I just wanted to be a kid," Jane says. "Even though I love them more than anything."

Gemma nods. "Do you think I'd be a bad sister if I told her she's gotta go back to her room?"

The question is so earnest, that Maura can't help smiling.

Jane manages not to. "You could never be a bad sister," Jane says, and she waits until Gemma looks up at her. "Never."

Gemma smiles into her lap before getting up. "Thanks, Jane," she says.

"Anytime, kid," Jane says. "You heading to bed? There's no more of that horrible Algebra to do tonight, is there?"

Gemma makes a noise that might be half of a laugh. "Math isn't so bad," she says quietly.

Maura perks up. "That's my girl," she says.

Gemma looks at her, eyes wide, for a split second before turning away. "K," she says. "I'll tell her...tomorrow."

"Night, Gemma," Jane says, leaning back into the couch. "We love you."

"Yeah," Gemma calls from the hall. "Me too."

Maura waits until she hears the door upstairs shut to climb onto Jane's lap and kiss her hard.

"What's that for?" Jane asks when she pulls away.

"Seeing you as a mother," Maura says, sliding her hands onto Jane's stomach. "It's sexy."

Jane just growls.

6.

…

Maura thinks that it takes Jane an amazing amount of restraint to not slam the door. She shuts it carefully, like it's made of glass, and then rests her hand against it, breathing hard.

"It will go better next time," Maura says, stepping up to put a hand on Jane's arm.

"I said they weren't ready," Jane says through gritting teeth. She is still leaning against the door, eyes closed. "I told them we needed to wait."

"You know we couldn't have asked them to wait any longer. Especially not Addison."

Jane doesn't answer, and Maura rubs her hand up and down her arm. "She got so much of your attention and love, Jane, and she needed to see where you were putting some of that energy now."

Jane opens her eyes, turning to face Maura. "I don't remember kids being so cruel when I was young," she says lowly, running a hand through her hair.

Maura smiles sadly. "You were pretty and sporty…I don't think you had the opportunity to experience the cruelty children are capable of.

Jane reaches out her arms and pulls Maura to her. "Did I do the right thing?" she asks.

Maura slips her arms under Jane's and up around her shoulders. She thinks of Jane's face as she'd stepped between Addison and Gemma, both of them looking like they were ready to jump at the other.

"What is going on?" She'd yelled.

"I DON'T WANT HER," Gemma was yelling. "YOU CAN HAVE HER. I DON'T WANT TO BE A PART OF YOUR FUCKING FAMILY ANYWAY. YOU'RE A FREAK."

Addison's face had gone as red as the front door of the Bartlett home, but her voice had been very calm and even as she'd replied.

"Well at least that's better than an orphan that nobody wants to take care of."

"Addison has a mother," Maura says quietly, because she knows that Jane is remembering the way she'd yelled at her. The way she'd put her arm around Gemma and yelled at Addison for saying such calculatedly cruel things.

How she'd turned on the spot and left the Bartlett's, Maura following close behind with Sylvie.

"Addison has a mother, and it's not you, Jane. No matter how much she may wish it sometimes." She presses a kiss to Jane's shoulder.

"You did the right thing. You'll keep doing the right thing. I know it."

There is the sound of a door slamming upstairs. The ride home had been prickly with silence, and the moment they'd gotten inside, Gemma had stormed upstairs to her room, Sylvie following behind her as fast as she can.

Jane pulls away, and looks at the ceiling, like she can see through into Gemma's room.

"Okay," she says with a deep breath. "Let's go."

…

Sylvie's door is open, and so that is where they stop first. They peek into the room, and see the little girl standing by her dresser. Her back is to them, but her shoulders are shaking, and she sniffles every so often.

"Sylvie?" Maura calls, and the little girl turns around at her name. She is clutching her worn quilt square, and her eyes are red from crying. "Honey," Maura says, stepping quickly into the room. "What's wrong?"

Sylvie takes a deep breath. "G-g-gemma says I can't take everything w-with me, and I-I-I don't know what to bring because I like it all a lot."

She bursts into tears, and it's Jane, who moves across the room to scoop her up in her arms. She sits down on the bed with Sylvie in her lap and strokes her hair.

"Where are you going, bug?" she asks softly.

Sylvie clings to Jane. "Gem says you're going to give us back," she says, her voice dropping almost to a whisper. "I'm sorry we were bad at the party."

Jane wraps her arms around Sylvie so that she almost disappears in her hug. "You weren't bad, Vee," she says. "And even if you or Gemma were to do something wrong, we would never send you away. That's not how families work."

Sylvie presses her face to Jane's chest, still holding tight. "Gemma says we aren't your family. She says we're just stand ons."

Jane's jaw tightens. Maura sees her physically restrain herself from tensing. Instead she stands with Sylvie in her arms as though she weighs nothing. "Let's go talk to Gemma," she says. "clear everything up,"

As she walks to the door, where Maura is still standing, Sylvie reaches out her arms for a hug.

"Mo?"

"It's going to be okay, darling," Maura says, a little shakily. "Jane and I love you and your sister so much. Nothing you do could change that."

Sylvie burrows back into Jane, but she nods. "Okay."

.

Maura doesn't get an answer when she knocks on Gemma's door across the hall, so – at a nod from Jane – she pushes the door inward.

Gemma is in the middle of her room, open duffle bag on the floor beside her. She's staring at the door as it opens, and then she fixes Jane with a withering glare.

"You can't keep her," she says.

Jane stands for a beat with Sylvie in her arms, just sizing the teenager up, then she shifts Sylvie towards Maura. "Go to Maura, sweetheart," she says, when Sylvie clings tighter.

"No!"

"Vee, go to-"

"No!" Sylvie cries again.

Maura puts her hands on Sylvie's back, fighting against the tears in her eyes.

"Sylvie," Jane says, still as gentle as ever. "I need to talk to Gemma, now. Go to Mommy. She'll hold onto you. I promise."

The word slips from Jane's mouth so easily that Maura doesn't initially realize why she has chills. Sylvie does as she says, shifting herself into Maura's arms, and wrapping her arms around the doctor's neck.

"Mommy," she mumbles against Maura's cheek.

Jane turns back to face Gemma. "We're not sending you back," she says evenly. "There's nothing you could do that could make us want to."

Gemma scoffs at this. "You're a liar," she says, and it's clear that she's trying not to cry. She wants to project only anger and strength.

It makes Maura feel weak with affection for her.

"I'm not lying."

"Yes you are. You're just looking for a replacement for your dead kid." Maura sees Jane's hands curl. Gemma doesn't miss it either. Fear flickers across her face for a split second, before it is replaced by determination. "Well I'm not his replacement and neither is my sister."

"Gemma," Jane begins, but the girl shakes her head, wiping away an escaping tear with the back of her hand.

"No!" She says, voice rising in an attempt to keep her anger. "You can't deny it. You just got us because your son died. You don't really care about us."

"Yes I do," Jane says.

"How come you never say you love us?" Gemma counters, and Jane frowns at her.

"I say it all the time," she says, confused.

"No you don't!" Gemma yells. "Maura says it all the time. She says I. Love. You. Just like that. You haven't said that you love us. Not once. And that's because you don't. You still love him."

Jane works her jaw. She repeats Maura's reassurance from before Gemma and Sylvie arrived. "I can do both," she says. Her voice is on the razor's edge of anger.

"Maybe with Addison," Gemma says the other girl's name with open disgust. "But not with us. How come you never talk about him?" She states the question like a challenge.

Jane does not answer. She is speechless.

Gemma crosses her arms, but she doesn't look satisfied. The gesture is protective, not aggressive. "How come you never talk about him?" she asks again. "But you always say that Sylvie and me can talk about our mom whenever we feel like it. You always say we can talk about the things that scare us, but you never talk about your scary stuff."

Jane is as pale as one of the bodies in Jane's morgue. "I want you two to know that it's safe here."

"You want to erase those memories," Gemma says, like a correction.

"No," Jane says, "I don't."

"Yes, you do. But you can't. I won't do it. I won't lose her, and I won't let Sylvie either."

In Maura's arms, Sylvie sniffs, trying to push further into her arms.

"Jane," Maura says quietly, but Gemma moves at that moment, trying to push past them out into the hall.

Jane blocks her way. "No," she says firmly. "If you want to leave, that's one thing, but you don't just get to walk out."

"What do you care?" Gemma asks. Movement seems to have shaken the tears loose. They roll down her cheeks and drip from her chin.

Jane puts her arms around her, half a hug, half a restraint. "No," she says, again. "No."

"Get off me," Gemma cries, though she no longer seems to fighting it.

Jane wraps her tighter.

"Get off me! You're not my fucking mother!"

Jane flinches, but doesn't let go. She drops her chin onto Gemma's shoulder, and one tear rolls down her cheek too.

"And you're not my fucking son," she growls.

…

…

Jane holds out her right hand to Sylvie, palm up, offering it for inspection. She takes it tentatively and touches one finger to the raised scar in the center.

On her left, Gemma is already inspecting the other side of Jane's hand, brow furrowed.

"Did it hurt?" Sylvie asks in a whisper. She's sitting in the open circle left my Maura's crossed legs, and when she's looked her fill, she drops Jane's hand and presses backwards, against the doctor's chest.

It's past 11:30 at night, but she's still wide awake. They all are.

"Yeah," Jane says, nodding. "And sometimes they still hurt a little."

"I have a scar on my shoulder from where a boy we were living with bit me one time," Sylvie says. "But it doesn't hurt anymore."

"Good," Jane says. She glances at Gemma, who is still looking at her hand.

"So," Jane glances at Maura, and then around at Gemma. "You guys know how, when you lost your mom, they told you that it was okay to feel whatever you were feeling?"

Gemma nods, and Sylvie does too. "The doctor said that, 'member Gem?"

"The psychiatrist," Gemma says. "Yeah."

Jane nods. "My psychiatrist said that too, when I lost Connor. Everyone said it. A lot. And my Ma, and the people I work with. They said all the things that I bet people said to you."

"It will get easier," Gemma says with a snort.

Jane smiles. "One day at a time."

"Be happy you have each other."

Jane touches Gemma's knee gently. "Exactly. And they repeated and repeated it, but as time went on, I felt like…the way they were saying it got…" Jane trails off.

"Impatient," Maura says quietly, and Jane and Gemma nod at the same time.

"Like they think I shouldn't be hurting anymore," Jane says. "Like I should be over it."

"But that was your baby," Sylvie says.

"And it was your mommy," Jane responds. "And, I'm really, really sorry if I made you feel like you should forget about her. I know how that feels, and I wanted the opposite for the two of you."

Gemma is crying again. Jane's hand is still on her knee, and the girl reaches out and takes it in hers.

"Addi said you wouldn't love us like you loved her because we didn't have any connection."

Jane shakes her head. "She's wrong," she says simply. "And when we go over to apologize for the way we spoke to her, we'll have that conversation as well."
"I got jealous," Gemma says. "And scared."

Jane pulls Gemma's head closer so she can kiss her temple. "I know both of those emotions really well," she says. "It's okay."

"Is he dead?" Gemma asks shakily. "The man who killed Connor? Who did that to your hands?"

Jane nods. "Yes."

"Good," Sylvie says from Maura's lap. She is finally starting to get sleepy. Maura rocks her gently.

"Time for sleep, honey? This has been a long, long night."

Sylvie nods, but doesn't let go. "I want to stay with you." she rubs her eyes. "I want to stay with you and Jane."

"Me too," Gemma says, though she means something different from her sister. "Can we? I mean. Do you think it will work?"

Maura starts to struggle up from the floor, Sylvie still clinging to her like an oversized sloth.

Jane stands too, waiting until Gemma is up and facing her to answer.

"Yes," she says quietly. "I love you. And I love your sister, and I love Maura. And this is the family I want."

Sylvie's eyes are closed, but she grins from Maura's shoulder. "Hooray," she says sleepily.

Gemma hugs Jane. Hard. She says something into the folds of Jane's sweatshirt, but Maura cannot make it out.

Jane whispers back to her, squeezing back just as tight.

"I'm here," she says. "It's going to be okay."

…

They tuck them into bed side by side in their room, promising to be back within the hour, and after she's flicked the light, Maura stands in the hall, listening to her children whispering in the darkness of her room.

Jane takes her hand. "Maura," she says, tugging her towards the stairs. "Come downstairs for a while, I want to talk to you."

Maura lets herself be lead downstairs. In the hallway by the kitchen Maura stops, waiting until Jane turns to her.

"Maura,"

"Call Chloe in the morning," she says. "Tell her there's no more trial period."

"Okay," Jane says with a smile.

"Promise."

"I promise." Jane steps up to her. "Now shh, so I can kiss you."

Maura smiles. She lets the kiss linger.

"Remember that day you first invited me in?" Jane asks quietly. "Remember? The rain?"

Maura doesn't think she'll ever forget. "Yes. I was so afraid you wouldn't go out. And then I was afraid that if I didn't go, you'd be there and you'd think I valued being dry over you."
"I thought," Jane looks away for a moment, and then back. "I thought, if I go out today, and she's there, I'll try and get closer. It will prove that she cares about me, and I'll…"

"Me too," Maura says, grinning.

"But you're braver than me. You asked to me to come in."

"You did it. That makes you brave too."

Jane runs a hand through her hair. "I've never asked you to…" she falters, and then recovers. "You've always just seemed to know what I need. Last year on Connor's…That scrap book. I couldn't have verbalized that need. And you just seemed to know."

Maura doesn't answer. There's doesn't seem to be a need to.

"Loving you was like the first thing I did for myself in forever. Just letting myself love you. And I told myself that I would just do it. And it wouldn't be betraying him because if you loved me back, you would have loved him."

"I would have loved him," Maura echoes. She is sure of it.

"And the same with the Bartletts. It wasn't betrayal, because…because," her voice breaks, but she shakes her head when Maura reaches for her. "No. I'm…It was fine because he was inside her. He still is, even though she's herself now, too."

Maura just nods.

"So…please tell me that how I feel about those two isn't betraying him." She looks at Maura, all dark, imploring eyes. "I want this family. So badly, Maura."

Maura swallows. "I read his autopsy," she says finally.

Jane just blinks at her.

"Frost asked me to. Before I met you. Before the funeral. He came and asked me to read it. To make sure that Dr. Pike had done a thorough job."

Jane shakes her head. "Frost never said…"

"So I know everything," Maura says over her. "I know the wounds he sustained. I know what you did to your hands to get to him when he stopped making noise, and I know how long you gave him CPR, to keep his heart beating, even though you were dying too, Jane."

Jane leans against the wall, and covers her mouth with her hand. Maura steps up to her, she presses her forehead to the taller woman's shoulder.

"And that kind of love can't be locked away. It can't just be shoved aside because the person who earned it first is gone. The real betrayal to Connor would be to let the love you have to give stay hidden. To let it eat away at you until you're nothing."

Jane shivers, and Maura kisses the shoulder closest to her mouth.

"It's going to be okay," she says. "You and me, those little girls…we're going to be okay. And that's not betrayal, honey. That's justice."

As if in answer to this declaration, There is a thump from upstairs, and then the sound of tiny feet on the hardwood of the hallway.
"Mommy?" A whisper floats down to them. Sylvie, on the top landing, her head through the bars of the railing.

"Mommy? Mama J?" she calls, "Has it been within a hour yet?"

Maura stifles a laugh against Jane's chest.

"Coming, love," Jane calls back quietly. "We'll be right there."