I read an excerpt from a book that really impacted me especially after the season 3 finale for Flash. I hope you enjoy this little one shot, and I will update my other stories soon!
It was honestly hard seeing himself...so broken. Looking at the time remnant that his future self had created to stop Saviatar, no the one that became Savitar, was like looking into a mirror that had been shattered. The different shards that lay cracked upon the frame represented the different aspects of his personality: his goodness, his kind heart, his will to do good and help others. Those were the small ones; the ones that were so tiny that they would have to be held with a pair of tweezers if they were to be put back together. The bigger ones were the hatred, the corruptness, the evil, the spite, and the anger that had over taken that good part of himself.
"You and I are so much more alike than you realize," Saviatar had told him.
Indeed they were. Barry could feel it within him. A darkness. The darkness of course was overshadowed by the light. But at times, he could feel it straining for the surface and digging its claws into his soul as if to wrench it from his anchor. There were times where it had almost gotten free even before when Saviatar had come to life.
"A fight is going on inside me," Grandfather said to the boy.
To hold the darkness down he had turned to Iris. She was his anchor, and his guiding light. She was the only one who saw both the good and the bad within him, and focused on the good as it was what made him, him. It was what made him both Barry Allen and the Flash.
"It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves."
But that didn't mean that he still didn't fight against the Dark Side. After seeing Saviatar; there was a little voice within him saying, "Couldn't I become that? Couldn't I become a god? With my powers, I could be unstoppable."
With his powers, he had transcended above humankind. He was more powerful than most and that made him feel guilty as the power could easy play him as easily as he played with it. If he abused it, there was no turning back.
One is evil – he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego."
Sometimes Barry wondered, if he would ever loose that good side to him, and channel his inner Darth Vader. But, there was that other side, the side that made him whom he was. That side was Iris. It was because of her that he hadn't succumbed. His mother...was another reason. Because of her presence in the first twelve years of his life, he felt as if her loving spirit had made him whom he was today.
Grandfather continued, "The other is good – he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. The same fight is going on inside you – and inside every other person, too."
Looking at the swirling vortex with Speedforce Nora standing with her arm stretched out, made him question himself. He had abused his powers. He in fact was no better in Saviatar by using his powers to pull a 'god-like' move and changing the timeline. He had changed several million individuals lives for the better or for the worst.
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "Which wolf will win?"
Taking a deep breath, Barry steeped forward into the light and closed his eyes as the warmth of the speedforce washed over him. He would come back; but only after his penance was through. He knew which side he chose.
The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."
I honeslty have mixed feelings about the ending. But I thought this story went along side Barry's struggle the entire season. I hope you enjoyed!
"The Two Wolves"
—An old Cheeroke legend