So here's the final chapter! Finally a little comfort and R&R for our heroes :)

Thanks again to Aini NuFire for betaing this story! Check out her new S12 hiatus AU fic "Miracles Do Happen" for some angsty goodness ^_^

Chapter Twelve

Castiel's head ached, and he knew it wasn't all from when Naomi had knocked him unconscious. The inside of his skull felt like it had been carved out and rearranged. He shuddered as he realized that wasn't far from the truth.

He was still processing what he had done, what Naomi had done to him. Trying to figure out what she had made him do, the thoughts she had put into his head, as opposed to ones he'd had himself, only made his head hurt worse.

"Cas?"

He found he had stopped walking, the others a few steps ahead, watching him with concern. He shook himself, trying to focus. "I—I'm okay."

"No, you're not," Dean said firmly, sympathy and worry in his eyes. "And no one is gonna expect you to be either."

"What I did…"

Sam stepped forward and gripped his shoulder with a small smile. "We've all been there, Cas. We know it wasn't you."

"You're the one who needs to realize that," Meg told him.

Seeing the three pairs of trusting eyes settled on him, caused him to feel a warmth start in his chest, beginning to chase away the cold horror that had settled there. He knew it would take him a while to forgive himself, or at least to tell himself he wasn't to blame when he had felt himself hurting his friends, but if they were this forgiving, he decided he could probably do so eventually once he got over the shock.

He followed them again, Sam's hand still gripping his shoulder for a few steps, when Castiel caught sight of a body cast into a corner of the room. Recognition and grief crashed over him and he broke free of the others to crouch next to the body.

"Samandriel," he said sadly. "But, how…?" He vaguely recalled flashes of seeing the other angels carrying Samandriel's body and Naomi saying he had been killed by the prisoners; but Castiel knew now that hadn't been the truth.

Sam cursed softly. "He—he helped us find you and Meg, Cas," he said.

Castiel felt Meg's hand on his back, soft and supportive. Castiel didn't need more explanation than that. He reached out and touched Samandriel's cold cheek. "I'm sorry brother," he whispered. "Thank you."

"Sorry, Cas," Dean told him sincerely as Castiel straightened up again stiffly. "He seemed like an okay guy."

"Samandriel was one of the good ones," Castiel said, swallowing back the grief. "He truly understood what it was to be an angel. So few do anymore."

"You do," Sam told him.

Castiel gave the younger Winchester a rueful smile. "Sometimes I'm not so sure."

Meg's hand slipped into his and she tugged him toward the door. "Come on. We should leave. I don't want to be here if more angels show up."

Castiel nodded tiredly, casting one last look at Samandriel, before he continued toward the door with the rest of them.

The late afternoon sun made his eyes and head hurt again, but it was warm, and he was grateful for that at least. He was even more grateful when he saw the Impala parked around one side of the abandoned factory. It was then he realized he had started to associate the vehicle with a sense of comfort and safety, exactly how he felt with the Winchesters.

"Let's get you two cleaned up a little," Dean said, opening the trunk and rooting around for the first aid kit.

Castiel sat down on the Impala's hood and Meg joined him. He glanced over at her while Sam and Dean were still rummaging around in the trunk, and saw the bloody welt on the side of her face. A memory flashed behind his eyes of him hitting her with the angel blade. Guilt clenched in his chest and he reached out to gently run his fingers over the bruise.

"I'm so sorry," he said softly. "I didn't want to hurt you."

Meg smiled, and took his hand from her face, capturing it in both of hers. "I know you didn't. Besides, we're even." She nudged his knee with her own, and Castiel snorted and shook his head with some amusement. He had wondered why it was somewhat sore.

He brought his other hand up and carefully swept some of Meg's hair away from her face, noticing some blood matted in it that would have to be cleaned out. "Thank you," he told her. "If it hadn't been for you…you broke her hold on me. I don't want to think about what would have happened if you hadn't."

Meg smiled and reached up to touch his face. "I couldn't have you be her puppet, Clarence. That's not you. Thanks for ganking her in the end too."

Cas smiled wryly. "You got more hits in."

She smirked. "It felt good too. That bitch."

Dean came over with the first aid bag then, but stopped as he saw their closeness. "Um, need a minute?"

Castiel pulled away slightly and shook his head. "No, I want to tend to her wounds."

Meg raised an eyebrow at him. "What about yours?"

"Yeah, are you good, Cas?" Dean asked worriedly. "I mean, you bled out your eyeballs."

Castiel reached up and touched the now dry tracks of blood on his cheeks. Dean grabbed a handkerchief from his pocket and pulled a bottle of water from the bag, wetting it. Castiel thanked him and started to clean the blood off. "I…think that was a result of breaking her hold on me. But I will be fine. I just have a headache. Mostly I'm just feeling a bit overwhelmed."

"I bet," Sam said as he joined them, holding a bundle of tan fabric in his hands. He handed it to Castiel with a smile. "You left this in the room," he said.

Castiel gratefully took his trench coat from the younger Winchester. He was still wearing the jeans and blue button down, but as soon as he held the trench coat again he felt a little more complete. "Thank you," he said sincerely.

There was some makeshift first aid then, cleaning up their wounds. Nothing really needed bandaging, thankfully, even though they were all beat up and sore. Not to mention exhausted. Even Castiel was tired, feeling drained. It had been a long day.

Meg grabbed her bag from the trunk, pulling out a fresh pair of clothes that didn't have blood on them and glanced at the others with a cocked eyebrow. "You gonna turn around so I can change?"

The three men swiftly turned, and Castiel was surprised at the urge he had to glance over his shoulder. He felt his face heat up at that thought, and was even more embarrassed when Meg walked up to them, in clean clothes, having even washed the blood out of her hair with the water bottle. There was only some bruises on her cheek that told of their capture. Castiel was perfectly happy to forget it.

"Did you peek?" Meg asked him with a twinkle in her eye, and his face only heated up more.

"No," he said and glared at Dean who was smirking at him with a raised eyebrow. "No, I did not!"

"Oh, Cas," Dean chuckled, shaking his head. "Never change."

Castiel glared indignantly at him, wondering what was wrong with a little chivalry, but Meg took his hand and pulled him back toward the car. "Don't mind them, Cas. We gonna get out of here or what?"

"Hell yes," Dean agreed and slid into the driver's seat. Cas and Meg got into the back and pretty soon the four of them were speeding down the highway, far away from the bad memories that remained at the factory.

A few hours later, they stopped in a small town in the middle of nowhere, where they hoped no one would look for them. The sun was setting as Dean pulled into a brightly lit, cheerful diner, and they trooped inside for some supper.

"I don't know about you, but I think we deserve some pie after that," Dean told them.

Sam shook his head but was smiling. "I'm for a banana split, myself."

The four of them sank into a booth and a motherly waitress took their orders, soon bringing heaping plates of food. Castiel had even ordered a hamburger, so low on energy he didn't think food would be a bad idea. The coffee he'd gotten had already helped his headache and warmed his body nicely. He picked up the hamburger and took a cautious bite. It tasted like cooked meat and cheese and a toasted bun, not like molecules. Normally, that might have alarmed him, since it meant he was very low on power, but for tonight, he was just going to enjoy it.

Meg smiled at him and stole a French fry off his plate to dip into her chili. He glanced over at her, saw her watching him, and smiled shyly. He was still processing everything, the capture—before the capture—her kiss that had broken his contact with Naomi…but mostly he was just glad she was back with him. That she was alive. That Sam and Dean were too. If Meg hadn't been there to snap him out of Naomi's control, he might have lost all of them and never remembered what he'd had before.

Meg seemed to see the emotions roiling inside of him, because she reached out and rested a hand just above his knee, squeezing comfortingly. Castiel felt some tension wash out of him, as she kept the contact, a constant reminder that she was there.

"So, what now?" Dean asked around a mouthful of bacon cheeseburger.

Sam shot him a look. "Dude, the last time you asked that, a whole ton of crap happened," he said.

Dean shrugged. "Well, nothing is ever gonna stop, you know that, right? That's kind of part of the gig. But still. I think we deserve a little R&R. Maybe we should go to the beach?"

Sam gave a bemused smile. "Seriously?"

"Yeah, man," Dean insisted. "Sun, sand…chicks in bikinis. When was the last time we went to the beach?"

"Um, never," Sam said.

"Exactly! It's time, dude."

"I'd like that," Meg said, surprising Castiel. She narrowed a glance at the Winchesters. "If I'm invited."

"Oh, well, sure," Dean said with a shrug. Sam and Castiel both shot him a surprised look. "I mean, you're kinda one of the gang now, right? Besides, I don't think Cas wants to set you adrift anytime soon."

Castiel looked down at his plate in embarrassment as Meg glanced at him questioningly, but he flicked his eyes up to hers with a shy smile. "I…would like to have you around if you want to stay, Meg," he said.

"I'd love to stay, Clarence," she said with a smirk and moved the hand she had on his leg upwards, surprising him. Castiel jumped, his face heating up as Sam and Dean chuckled. He cleared his throat and gulped the last of his coffee. Meg gave him a devilish look.

"It's settled then," Dean said, clapping his hands together eagerly. "The beach it is!"

"Only after we get a good night's rest," Sam insisted. "I'm beat."

Dean agreed with that. They spent the rest of the meal talking about where to go for their impromptu vacation and what they would do there. Castiel sank into the feeling of warmth and friendship the atmosphere provided, finding it easier to forget what Naomi had done to him than he had expected. He was just glad that everyone he cared about was here, and okay and planning a vacation of all things. It was almost surreal, but he was thankful that it wasn't just a good dream. It was real, and miraculously, they were all okay in what seemed like the first time in forever. Maybe that boded well for the future.

After they'd finished their meal, they went to the nearest motel and Dean and Sam bid Castiel and Meg goodnight.

"Just keep it down, you two," Dean told them, as he handed them their key. "Some of us sleep."

Castiel narrowed his eyes at him. Honestly, that night, he was hoping to sleep himself, and he figured Meg probably would too. All four of them were exhausted.

"And don't worry, Dean," he said in parting. "I have my angel blade and will keep it closer to hand this time."

Dean's eyes widened and he made the face he did when he was trying not to laugh. Castiel still didn't understand what was funny, but Dean simply clapped a hand to his shoulder, winked at Meg, and left to go to his and Sam's room.

However, even though weariness pulled at him, as Castiel lay in the bed with Meg curled up next to him, he just couldn't sleep and it wasn't because he wasn't low on energy. He needed to rest, but he couldn't put his mind at ease. Every time he closed his eyes, the flashes of what he had done under Naomi's control assaulted him, the sound of the drill as she tore into his mind, rearranging it as she pleased. It made him feel exposed, violated, and he couldn't relax with the thoughts of how much worse it could have been.

Finally, he got up and slipped out of the room. The night was cool, and there were many stars in the sky. Castiel walked over to where the Impala was parked and settled himself on the hood, craning his neck back to look up at the millions of twinkling lights up there in the darkness. He let the cool breeze wash over him, calming and soft, and closed his eyes, trying to clear his mind.

"Can't sleep?"

His eyes flew open and he glanced over to see Meg standing beside him, wearing his trench coat against the chill. He smiled at the sight of it enveloping her small figure, looking ridiculous, but at the same time, he liked seeing her in it.

"No, there's…much going on inside my head," he admitted.

"Well, at least there's something going on in there," she said sincerely.

Castiel gave her a rueful smile and nodded. "Yes. That is something to be thankful for."

Meg settled next to him, their thighs and shoulders pressed together. After a moment, he awkwardly settled an arm around her, pulling her closer. He was still rather unpracticed with these motions, but Meg seemed to like that, and settled against him, head resting on his shoulder.

"Castiel," she asked after a while. "Why do you not find me…repulsive…like the other angels do?"

Castiel glanced down at her, his brow furrowed, wondering what had brought that up. Then he thought about Naomi, and had a feeling she had spoken with Meg, probably said some very offensive things. "I guess it's because I see you for who you really are," he told her simply. "You are not like any other demon I have ever met. There is not all darkness in you."

Meg craned her neck to look up at him somewhat incredulously. "Really?"

He smiled softly. "There is some, yes, and there are thorns, but there are roses too." He brought a hand up to trace his fingers right under her collarbone on her left side, where her heart was. "Roses are never without their thorns, but that's what makes them stronger. Perhaps they're even more beautiful because of it."

Meg's smile was illuminated in the starlight, and he felt his stomach flip as if he had flown too quickly. "That's really how you see me?" she asked incredulously.

He smiled back. "Yes."

"You really think I'm beautiful even under this meatsuit?" She cocked an eyebrow, sounding skeptical.

Castiel stared at her for a long moment, reaching up to cup her face gently before he replied in earnest, "Yes. I do."

Her eyes gleamed and he leaned over to press a soft kiss to her lips before pulling back. Meg looked slightly disappointed, and he would like to continue kissing her more too, but he still had things to say.

"Meg," he began. "The angels will come for me again. It's only a matter of time."

"So?" she asked.

He shook his head. "I don't want them to hurt you."

She straightened, pulling away from him slightly so she could face him instead. "I think I can handle a few featherdusters," she told him. "Castiel, our lives are always going to be dangerous, just like Sam and Dean said earlier. We're never going to have a peaceful white picket fence life. The angels want your head, Crowley wants mine…the only thing we can do is live each day to the fullest. Keep going, and fight off whatever comes. I don't know about you, but I sure as hell am not gonna let that ruin what we have here, or what you have with the Winchesters." She smiled. "This is good, you know, the four of us. I think everyone else is just gonna have to learn to run."

Castiel smiled, a warmth spreading through his chest at her words. "As long as you know what you're getting into," he said.

She grinned. "I've known I was doomed since I met you."

"But not a bad doomed, I hope?"

"Only the best," she said, taking his face between her hands and leaning forward to kiss him.

He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close, a pleased moan escaping his throat as she deepened the kiss and pressed him back against the hood of the Impala. It was a long moment before they broke apart, both panting slightly in the starlight, Meg hovering over him, her hair a dark curtain shadowing one side of his face.

She smirked cheekily as she traced her fingers over the hollow of his throat, playing with the buttons on his shirt. His stomach flipped again with her light, teasing touch. She leaned in closer, her breath tickling his neck as she put her lips close to his ear. "What do you say we order some pizza?" she whispered to him before kissing his jaw.

Castiel levered himself up into a sitting position again, pulling her with him as he smiled at her, somewhat shyly but with a dose of resolve. "I think we can skip the pizza."

Meg grinned and he hooked his arm around her waist as they retreated back toward their room. Meg's lips were already on his again as they got inside and he felt a warmth of contentment wash over him as he slipped his coat from her shoulders and kicked the door shut behind them.

The End

Thanks as always to everyone who read and/or reviewed this story! I've got a One Shot coming next Monday, a S12 case!fic with much Cas whump and a Cas, Crowley and Mary team up.

After that On Friday July 14th I'm going to start posting the sequel to "Family First" so if you haven't read that one yet, now is the time to do so so you can be ready for the next story :)