Peach the Punk Princess

Chapter 7: Closing Song

Disclaimer: Mario belongs to Nintendo. All bands parodied to themselves. Lyrics, if any, to me.

-She knew the group from anywhere, figures that could occasionally show up in the back row of a show but never stick around after. They had a demo tape but it wasn't one that Peach could ever play aloud on her home stereo due to the 'controversial' lyrics. The quad of younger guys were somehow even bigger than Bowser Flag and meaner than The Mario Clash and yet-

they were her only hope with the wave approaching…

Bowser and Mario both fell from the chain and plummet onto a flower patch on the outskirts of Royal Raceway. The fake Bowser stomp up to both hero and villain only to collapse.

"Oof!...tired….so….hot..." Daisy admitted, face down. Drenched now in buckets of sweat from the foot race from Dark Land to the Mushroom Kingdom, the sneaky parasol finally short out. The Bowser disguise flashed a few times before fading away to reveal Princess Daisy at their feet.

Mario gawked. "What the?!"

Bowser growled with no sentiment. "That ain't who I wanted to see." He noticed a cab coming down the raceway and grin all of a sudden. "Yeah, now that's more like it!"

The cab stop and let two punks out who were actually Peach and Toadette. Peach shot across the yard in a panic while Toadette did the same but back towards the castle.

"I'm too late," Peach cried, dropping to her knees at Daisy's side. "I let them hurt you!"

"Ah-hem!"

Everyone's attention was directed to the raceway again because the vicious 'Mario Clash' band were standing there armed with plungers. The leader Cosmic Mario wore a sadistic smirk that put even Bowser to shame, not that the Koopa King wasn't scowling back with fierceness.

"Hey! Didn't I kidnap you losers?! Why aren't you stuck at my castle like the other bands?!"

Cosmic Mario chuckled dryly. "So you admit what that son of yours was talkin' about. I gotta admit you are an inspiration 'Bowsy'. Kidnapping? The oldest trick in the book yet so effective.."

"I KNOW IT'S GREAT. Why do ya think I keep doing it?" Bowser spat, stepping forward.

"Stop stop!" Peach spread her arms between Bowser and Cosmic Mario.

"Peach?" Mario interjected.

"Just let me say this Mario." Peach paused to get herself together. "Bowser really didn't do anything..this time. I shouldn't have snuck out without telling anyone. I'm sorry for worrying you guys and I've learned my lesson."

Cosmic Mario and his band raised eyebrows.

"-Punk as a subculture is fun but not to be taken lightly. In the end of the day it's filled with real people trying to make it in a cruel world, some good some bad."

"Like us?" Cosmic Mario sharply butt in.

Peach spun to him with a weak smile. "I don't want to call you a bad person. I know about your struggles from your music and it's not fair the way 'baddies' are treated compared to those more privileged. It's not your fault that some of you turn to villainy."

The koopa, goomba, and even yoshi band member nodded and Cosmic Mario was thoughtfully quiet but as usual someone ruined the mood.

"But I ain't poor and I'm a villain!" Bowser remark with some humor in his tone.

"Emotionally you are," Mario reply seriously, nudging him with an elbow.

Red fiery eyes dart to the plumber before realization set in. The tension then drained from Bowser and he became quiet and awkward as Cosmic Mario slowly clapped.

"Know what kid?" he asked with a softened face. "You're alright. I mean, you're young and sitting pretty yet you seem to know the way the world works. You ain't a poser I mean." He cooly dusted his leather jacket off.

"Teehee, thank you. I just read a lot about history and government and, well, you lean a lot about the plight of common people that way."

Cosmic Mario winked. "Keep studying, sweetheart."

Peach was ashamed to admit she was blushing and the clone was sort of cute all over again like the entire episode hadn't happened. Thankfully, Mario was still right behind her to shut anything down before it began.

"See you guys later," the hero said, artificially cordial. Mario's attention wasn't going to leave the punk group until they were over the horizon but before anyone could move a bright light was flashed on the backs of Mario, Peach, and Bowser.

"Over there!" Luigi shout atop a hill. The green plumber rushed down with the entire cavalry! The Mushroom King, Toadsworth, Buckenberry, Alagold, a few other toads from the castle and finally Toadette holding a flaming torch stormed down causing the band members of Cosmic Mario to shriek and run while the clone himself stared wide eyed before liquefying into a blue matter that sunk into the grass without a trace.

Just then Daisy's eyes fluttered just as many feet stomp by her from the group. They stop and pant while looking around.

"I think we scared them, bro. We did it!" Luigi proudly told Mario. Mario only shrug and pat him on the back, not knowing what else to say. He guessed they did do 'it', whatever it was.

"What I miss?" Daisy groggily ask.

Luigi help her up and supported her. "We ran off the horrible punks, except for Bowser, but he's not a punk."

"He is a menace though. Ya!" Buckenberry slung a very small butterfly net over Bowser's head that didn't fit. Bowser glared and flicked him off like a flea.

Meanwhile father reunited with daughter. "I was so worried I wouldn't see you again." The King pulled the blonde close for a hug. Peach was embarrassed for a moment only, this was long day and she wished to see her bed soon. Her eyes were closed and her head tucked up against her father's thick majestic robe with she heard the gasps of many.

"Heheheheheheh!" cackle a multitude of dark red miniature cosmic mario clones raising from the ground like a horror show come true. They scatter among the startled crowd attempting to run into anyone and then explode on impact with a red mist. Most toads were knocked out quickly. Mario and Luigi knew the extraterrestrial threat well but they weren't prepared for an infinity spawning pack who could copy movements so perfectly. Mario got caught, then Luigi. Peach scream in horror when her own father was tagged next in front of her. An arm turned her around firmly and she was then staring at her friend.

"Get outta here, sister," Daisy said, nodding at Bowser for some reason.

"What flower chick said. Save ya self. The ships on auto." And then Bowser hauled Peach high into the air before she could react. There was a chain and an airship above that had just swept through. She grab the chain and was brought higher into the sky and away from her front yard and the chaos. Panic set in again, where was this unmanned sky vessel actually taking her? It seemed to dip a bit once they were in Toad Town so the princess saw her chance and let go. She fell into a soft pile of leaves on the side of the street. The airship kept going downward and crash into a shop a block away with an explosion. She shield her eyes from the flames, heart racing but safe.

Peach took about ten or so numb steps away from the disaster before she saw a group at the bus stop with luggage. A group of punks. One, a tall hammer bro, noticed her.

"Hey girl. You a local?"

Peach nodded cautiously.

"Do you know when the next bus to Dark Land's coming? We saw an ad-"

"Don't do that! It's a trap, Bowser kidnaps bands!"

Another member, a boom boom with glasses laughed it off. "We know. Don't you know who we are?"

Peach was about to say something else before she saw the worse thing possible down the street. The cosmic clones had caught up. "Watch out!"

The band however took a look at the horde and drop their bags and gear. A string or so might have popped but it didn't matter.

"Let's treat em like we do all 'Bowser punks'," the Piranha plant member said in a distinctively raspy tone. Peach did know these people. The Dead Koopas. Infamously hardcore. Infamously political. Infamously anti-Bowser. And judging by them quickly grabbing their guitars and three piece drum set she was about to finally hear their song that she dare not play at home.

"1, 2, 3," the singer said unfettered with the clones mere yards away.

"Punk ain't no videogame cult

Punk means thinking for yourself

You ain't hardcore because you wish you were Bowser

When a scared little toad lives inside your head

Bowser punks

Bowser punks

Bowser punks screw off!"

Peach meant to run but became mesmerized. The sound of their ruckus was like a wave rolling through the clone army reducing them all to motionless screaming forms covering their ears before poofing out of existence. Her ears stung by the rawness and passion of the acoustic version of the hit song, or maybe they just sounded kind of bad. Either way her fears could ebb away.. and also she had a headache.

The band stop playing. "Where'd they go? Oh well. This how how most of our concerts go..."

Peach woke up in her own room and bed. Everything was in place, her posters, the stereo, and crown on the dresser. The closed blinds were completely dark so she must have woken up early morning. Cutting on a little lamp, she reach for something to read. The punk fanzine was tempting on the nightstand but there was also a slightly dusty but thick world history book. She decided that, maybe she was in the mood for that and would continue to be for some time. Tomorrow she'd explain to friends and family that, while a punk at heart, she'd slow down a bit with it and explore other things in life…

Meanwhile Bowser was soon at his own castle beaten down by a clone or two or three or several but still determined to bounce back as always, even if that mean revisiting the same idea with a new gimmick tacked on. The Koopa King's stride slowed and he became perplexed as he approached the castle's courtyard and found Ludwig and Junior guarding the entrance with a red velvet ribbon across. There was even a 'please wait here' sign.

"This is the new entrance for the Dark Land History Museum, Vater," the blue haired prince explain after yawning.

Junior nodded eagerly. "And no meanie punk bands!"

Bowser said nothing and stomp inside, taking a gander at how they'd taken the normally empty field meant for military training and scattered a few paintings and sculptures around with a gravel path linking the 'exhibits'. He could dig it though, in fact he liked it!

"What are you thinking dad?" Junior asked, walking along side him.

Bowser spun dramatically to Ludwig who was still at the entrance. "You're a freaking genius. The Princess does had a second hobby about this stuff."

Ludwig did a double take. "Uh what- I mean… Yes, vater. I am! I have more art shipping in tomorrow and the entire layout meticulously planned. It is perfect because I am perfect. Bwa ha ha ha!" the koopaling laughed maniacally until some thunder boomed and a drops of rain drip on to his head and roll down onto his nice suit. The genius had forgotten one little thing. The courtyard didn't have a roof.

The END

Author note: So.. not really a book end, more of a hook for the adventures to continue off-screen. Thanks for reading.

Created: (drafts)3/6/39, (digital) 3/9/19, 3/10