Just like high school students who like to text during lessons, the teachers are pretty much the same—except that they do it by e-mail, using their PC, so that their supervisors think they are doing work errands. A little bit of Royai.
Chapter 1 – First day of class
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To : Roy Mustang
From : Heymans Breda
Subject : Gotta find your new chess playmate, pal
It's been weeks pass the new year eve and I still got to see the 'new year, new me' bullshit. Well guess what? More like 'new academic year, more new responsibility' for me.
Apparently I was appointed as the homeroom teacher for those 10th grade freshmen. Damn Bradley and his cunning ways—I was busy finishing my brunch, and he (intentionally, I bet) chose that exact moment to shove me a piece of paper. I signed it right away without paying much attention (well don't blame me. Sciezka's big mac was really good, just so you know) and the next thing I knew, my name was included in the homeroom teacher list.
Am I being theatrical? Trust me, I almost 'meh'-ed it until I saw the list of students placed in my class. And, godforsaken, one of them was Alphonse. Fckn. Elric.
As if one Elric is not enough for this school already (yes, I did check his personal information—they are indeed brothers).
If something could make it better tho, the 11th-grader Elric is placed in Hawkeye's homeroom class. Let's just see what kind of chaos that prankster dares to pull off under her nose.
Him who gained 10 lbs during the winter break,
Heymans Breda
Teacher, Mathematics
East Amestris Senior High School | 75 Sycamore Lane, East City
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To : Riza Hawkeye
Cc : Maria Ross
From : King Bradley
Attachment : 032_Ling_Yao .zip, 033_Lan_Fan .zip
Subject : Transfer Students
Ms. Hawkeye,
I write to inform you that in addition to the students placed in your homeroom class, there will be two transfer students to enroll:
Yao, Ling (class of 2016, transfer student from Xing Private School)
Fan, Lan (class of 2016, transfer student from Xing Private School)
Please note that these students have completed the administrative requirement and are ready to attend classes starting this new academic year.
I attached their personal information files in this e-mail. Gladly contact the School Guidance Counselor, Ms. Maria Ross, to proceed according to the standard operating procedure.
Regards,
King Bradley
Staff, Head of Administrative Affairs
East Amestris Senior High School | 75 Sycamore Lane, East City
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To : Heymans Breda
From : Roy Mustang
Subject : Re: Gotta find your new chess playmate, pal
An old saying that a man's brain contain is inversely proportional to his stomach's contain is true, apparently.
Don't be so dramatic. Been there done that—being a homeroom teacher is not as bad as they say it is. (Or, that was what I was going to say before I knew that you've got an Elric to tend. In this case, just good luck with that.)
Speaking of which, Hawkeye's homeroom class this year is really something, indeed. That pipsqueak and three at-risk-students and two foreign transfer students who, are still struggling to adapt to this country's language and culture. That old man really knows how to solve things quickly.
P.s give me back my chess set ASAP.
Regards,
Roy Mustang
Teacher, Chemistry
East Amestris Senior High School | 75 Sycamore Lane, East City
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To : Riza Hawkeye
From : Rebecca Catalina
Subject : I met Fatty at the water cooler and he told me
You hit the 'jackpot', Ri. No joke. Not even a senior teacher like Vato had been assigned to a class like that. See? Your grandpop is indeed heartless! I was not exaggerating anything!
But objectively speaking, that is in fact an efficient move, considering the accreditation is only months away. You can do it, girl—in fact, you're the best one who can handle this situation. I've spent my cash on those latest winter collection items I stashed in your room that I can't afford to treat you a whole pan of that infamous strawberry shortcake from that café near the subway so, cheer up!
Anyway, there will be a new teaching staff this year. Seems that she teaches some sort of literature, I don't know. Just wait till the Principal give us an official announcement.
And if rumours (which rumours? Water-cooler-chat rumours, for the winner!) are to be believed, that woman is scary. As. Heck. Maybe scarier than you, if that is even possible. Chill down a little, Honey—else Mustang won't have enough gut to make further move on you!
P.s I'll let you know if Maria offers a counseling session for teachers—seems that you really need it.
Your most beautiful flatmate,
Rebecca Catalina
Staff, Principal's Secretary
East Amestris Senior High School | 75 Sycamore Lane, East City
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To : Heracle Poarma
From : Izumi Curtis
Subject : Where are all the al dente?
You read that. And don't bullshit me, Scar—your culinary art class won't be starting in the next three days. I need them for tomorrow's lunch menu and Greed (also known as Christopher Vinther, the school's treasurer. Heaven knows where that nickname came from) will not give me even a penny to restock.
Ignore this message until 5 p.m and I will take back those pans you borrowed for your class.
Izumi Curtis
Staff, Head of School-managed Canteen
East Amestris Senior High School | 75 Sycamore Lane, East City
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To : Roy Mustang
From : Maes Hughes
Attachment : Elycia_on_winter_vacation .zip, Gracia_and_elycia_building_a_snowman .jpg
Subject : Your girlfriend seems pretty pissed off
First thing first,
LOOK AT MY BABES ELYCIA AND GRACIA ENJOYING OUR VACATION! WOOHOO!
Okay, so what did our renowned womanizer do to his blonde? I saw her when she walked out of her class and—wow, she got that look Gracia has everytime our neighbor's dog pooped on our yard!
Were you that bad in bed, seriously?
A preacher to Elysia's beauty,
Maes Hughes
Teacher, English Literature
East Amestris Senior High School | 75 Sycamore Lane, East City
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To : Maes Hughes
From : Roy Mustang
Subject : Re: Your girlfriend seems pretty pissed off
No. I'm not wasting 34 GB bandwith to download your vacation documentaries, for fck's sake.
How many times do I have to tell you, Maes, she is NOT my girlfriend. Yet. Whatever you take it.
It has something to do with her new homeroom class. Stop collaging 200-ish photos of Elysia all day and go out to chat a bit at the water cooler or pantry to catch some news.
Gotta catch my next class soon,
Roy Mustang
Teacher, Chemistry
East Amestris Senior High School | 75 Sycamore Lane, East City
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To : Maes Hughes
From : Kain Fuery
Subject : Bandwith limit
Mr. Hughes,
With all due respect, you have reached half of the limit of your bandwith this month on the first day of this semester. I suggest you to reduce unnecessary internet usage in order to continue using the wifi until the end of this month.
(Seriously, manipulating your data usage can bring me serious consequences. I did it once. I'm not doing it for the second time. Uh, sorry…)
Warmth,
Kain Fuery
Staff, Department of Information and Technology
East Amestris Senior High School | 75 Sycamore Lane, East City
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To : All contacts
From : Eugene Grumman
Subject : Announcement Letter : New Academic Year 2017
My dearest staffs,
Happy belated new year, and welcome to the new academic year of 2017. I really appreciate your hardwork in the previous year, and I hope this time, too, we can also work together, hand-in-hand, to achieve the same success just like last term, if not better.
First, as we all know, the next Triennial Accreditation for Amestris State Senior High Schools will be held this year. In order to prepare ourselves to face it, we have made several adjustments both in structural and functional positions;
Board of Accreditation Preparation : Roy Mustang, Miles, Vato Falman
Head of the Laboratory : Tim Marcoh
Homeroom teachers for class of 2015 : Maes Hughes, Heracle Poarma
Homeroom teachers for class of 2016 : Alex Louis Armstrong, Queen Rizzie
Homeroom teachers for class of 2017 : Heymans Breda, Jean Havoc
Second, I write this letter as well to announce that we will be welcoming a new teacher into our big family. Her name is Olivier Mira Armstrong, and she teaches German literatures. An expert in her major, she had been teaching the subject at North Amestris Senior High School for years prior to her transfer here. Ms. Armstrong will be arriving tomorrow, so make sure to spare some of your time to get to know each others better.
Feel free to knock on my office door should you have any concern.
Warmest regards,
Eugene Grumman
Principal
East Amestris Senior High School | 75 Sycamore Lane, East City
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To : Eugene Grumman
From : Riza Hawkeye
Subject : Re: Announcement Letter : New Academic Year 2017
Mr. Grumman,
I am honored to be trusted with such a responsibility without any prior notice, let alone my consent. In the future, should anyone find any trouble-maker students in their room, they are more than welcomed in my class. Thank you, Sir, I mean it. Thank you.
Thank. You.
And please start calling me by my proper name and title, especially in official letters.
With the biggest gratitude,
Riza Hawkeye
Teacher, Biology
East Amestris Senior High School | 75 Sycamore Lane, East City
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To be continued
Okay… how was that? This is my first time writing AU. And writing multichaptered fic. And writing it in unconventional way. So if you find anything weird of a bit off, let me know.
Fic inspired by a fanfiction I found on ffn written literally years ago, titled Failing Mailing from Hetalia fandom (it is not in English, though.) That fic was sooo good and funny and I was devastated to see that the author decided to discontinue the fic halfway through… So I kinda want to write something like that (with different plot and settings, of course.)
If you happen to stop by this fic, wilting protea, I dedicate this fic to you teehee.
Should I continue this? Or should I drop it? Please tell me your thoughts—reviewreviewreview!
Thanks for reading! And, ahem, kindly review?