Later in the morning, Sam and Max were sitting in a Waffle House booth not far from their home. Both were eating all the food they could get their hands on, especially Max.

"I'm glad your appetite has returned to normal, little pal," Sam said between taking bites of his waffles. "You had me worried."

"I am, too," Max said between taking bites out of his pancakes. "I was getting so sick of all the soup, water, and fruit juice crap you were forcing down my throat."

"I couldn't just let you starve because of your illness and oversensitive stomach. Could I? It's not my fault you couldn't digest anything else without throwing up. By the way, I must ask. Of all the places you could choose to celebrate your stomach's regained ability to function normally, why would you choose Waffle House? I like cheap food as much as the next canine, but this does seem like an odd choice for someone who hasn't eaten solid food in a week, especially when there are much better breakfast selections available, like IHOP for instance."

"I told you earlier. I wanted to come because of all the sketchy people, but no…you had to go and kiss me and force me to brush my teeth for two hours and shower for four more…"

"That explains why you smell good for once and why there was no hot water for my shower this morning."

"That's less than what you deserved for your sexual assault, Sam. You should be happy. Legally, I could have called the cops, but since we're both technically cops, it seemed like a moot point. Besides, I don't have the patience for the paperwork or the funds to bribe a judge."

"It was just a quick peck on your mouth to get you to stop pestering me for several hours so I could have some much-needed rest."

"I know certain overpaid and morally bankrupt lawyers that could convince a jury otherwise," Max said with his mouth full.

"You crack me up…" Sam started to say as his eyes spotted a certain someone that he never thought he would see again.

It was his ex-girlfriend Cleo, a grey poodle wearing a gaudy red dress who looked harmless on the outside, but on the inside, was the evilest person he had ever encountered in his life.

Seeing her again launched a flashback that Sam thought he succeeded in suppressing…

He was back in his college apartment in the dark cowering in a corner while his girlfriend was beating him in her psychotic rage yet again.

Sam was in his early twenties and had only recently become a freelance cop. He was dating Cleo at the time, going to college and working at the petting zoo. Everything had gone so well for the first few months, so well that the two of them moved in together. Sam thought it was a little fast, but Cleo had convinced him that it was the natural thing to do.

Cleo convinced him that a lot of things were okay. She convinced him to cut classes. She convinced him to skip work. She convinced him to listen to her more than anyone else. She convinced him to spend less time with his family and his best friend. She convinced him that she loved him even as she began to show her true colors. She convinced him that nothing was wrong when she started acting more unstable and getting angry more easily. She convinced him that it was his fault that she was losing her temper and beating him so much.

Sam eventually realized how terrible things had become. He was scared but even more so he was ashamed of himself for letting it happen. He was so ashamed that he hid the truth from everyone, including Max. He hid the bruises and lied about where they came from. Sam knew that Max was suspicious. He was not Einstein, but he wasn't stupid either. Sam wanted to tell him the truth, but he was afraid of what he would say. They were bullied as children, and Sam was afraid that Max would look down on him for letting himself be bullied as an adult.

This is how the situation was as Cleo was beating Sam for saying something she didn't like.

"You're lucky I'm here to take care of you or you'd be nothing!" Cleo yelled as her feet tenderized Sam's backside as he turned away from her and held his arms over his sore head and prayed for it to end. "You pathetic piece of shit, how dare you say that to me!"

"I'm sorry," Sam said quietly hoping it would stop. "I'm sorry! Please stop it! I won't say anything bad again."

"No! Not until you've learned your lesson!"

"You're hurting me."

"Good!"

Suddenly, as if an answer to prayer, Sam heard a battery ram being tossed against the door knocking it over instantly. Cleo evidently heard nothing as she continued her assault. He then turned around in time to see a bunch of flashing lights. That caught Cleo's attention. When the flashing subsided, he saw his little buddy being highlighted by the light in the hall standing there with his luger aimed at Cleo's face while Sam turned away in shame.

"What the hell is he doing here, Sam?!" Cleo yelled in panic.

Max kept the gun aimed at her and ran past her to look at Sam.

"Let me see, Sam," Max said trying to look him in the eye.

"No, Max," Sam said trying to look away. "Go away! I'm fine! Max don't…"

Max turned on a flashlight and shined it in Sam's face. Sam reluctantly turned to face him revealing a black eye, scratches, and bruises everywhere.

"Oh, my God," Max said in horror mixed with anger as he turned off the flashlight. "I knew it."

Then turning to Cleo, he said, "Get the hell out of here now, you evil harpy!"

"You can't tell me what to do," Cleo said in a sassy voice. "I'm his girlfriend."

"Did I stutter?" Max asked before he aimed his gun at the ceiling and shot a bullet into the air to show that it was loaded.

"You're #$%^&* crazy!" Cleo yelled.

"Yes, I am, but at least, I'm not a $%^&. GET OUT!"

Max aimed the gun at her face as Cleo grabbed her purse and ran out the door.

Sam was in shock. He had never seen Max that angry. There was a moment of silence before Max walked over to the light switch and turned on the light.

"Max…" Sam said standing up and trying to brush off his jeans and t-shirt. "I'm sorry…"

"You should be," Max replied turning to look at him.

"I know. I shouldn't have let this happen. I was so stupid. I don't know why I believed her…"

"That's not why you should be sorry. You didn't know that she would be a goddamn psycho, Sam. That's not your fault. You should be sorry for letting her get away with treating you like shit once you knew…"

Max looked down and Sam saw him surprisingly wipe away a few tears.

"Look, Sam," Max said looking back up at him with angry tears streaming down his face. "You and I were bullied as kids. We couldn't do anything about it then, but if we really want to be cops, we cannot let anyone bully us anymore. I don't let my family push me around and you can't let psychotic #$%^*& push you around either. If you do, you can't be a cop, you can't help people, and one day, I might not be there to protect you. You have to protect yourself, Sam. I don't want to have to go to prison for avenging your death. I can't lose you like that…"

While Max was wiping his eyes, Sam thought for a while and realized he was right. He couldn't be a victim anymore.

He said, "You're right, Max. I'm sorry. I won't let that happen again. Ever."

"You're damn right. You're not," Max replied as he resumed his normal psychotic demeanor. "Now, if you're done feeling bad, we have an errand to run."

"What are you talking about?"

"We have to arrest a certain psychotic ex for domestic violence and assaulting a police officer."

"What? But how will we convict her? The system is prejudiced against abused men. Besides, we don't have proof…"

Max's psychotic grin returned as he showed him polaroid pictures that he had snapped that showed Cleo beating Sam mercilessly and Sam's messed up face from the floor.

"We have all the proof we need, Sam," Max said showing his polaroid camera. "We also have the testimony of another police officer, namely me. So, what are we waiting for?"

Sam straightened up, smiled, and said, "Nothing. Let's go. Actually, wait a minute. I need to change."

"Why?" Max asked. "What's wrong with what you're wearing? Is this one of those 'clothes change as a sign of character transformation' clichés?"

"Yes, it is, Max," Sam said running into his bedroom. "Wait a moment."

After several minutes, Sam came out dressed in his film noir outfit that he would wear every day for the rest of his life.

"I found this get up at a Good Will," Sam said. "I always loved the style of film noir detectives so I thought I would take it on for myself. What do you think?"

"It's classy yet outdated," Max said. "It suits you. Now, are you ready to get back at your psycho girlfriend or what?"

"Readier than I've ever been in my whole life, little pal. Let's go."

Sam and Max ran to the DeSoto and tracked Cleo down. It was a fun adventure that was very rewarding and will not be detailed here. Once they did, they drove her to the police station and presented their evidence. Cleo was angry. She was going to be put away for a long time.

"How could you do this to me, Sam?" Cleo asked in her manipulatively helpless tone. "I just lost my temper. It's not my fault. We could still make this work."

"I know better than to believe any of your bullshit anymore, sister," Sam said sounding as callous as he could with his beaten face. "I never want to see you again."

"You'll pay for this!" Cleo yelled as another cop dragged her away. "You'll be alone forever!"

"No, I won't," Sam said looking at Max.

The two were paid for their work and went back to their car.

"I'm proud of you, Sam," Max said. "You did good. Now, if you're hungry, I'd like to…Sam?"

Sam pulled his hat over his eyes to disguise the fact that he was now the one who was crying. They were tears of relief.

"Sam?" Max asked in confusion. "What's the matter, Sam?"

Sam wrapped his arms around Max in a hug and said, "You saved my life. Thank you!"

"Come on, Sam. Have some dignity."

Sam continued crying so Max relented and said, "You're welcome, you big baby."

It was that night that Sam invited Max to move in so he wouldn't have to deal with his dysfunctional family anymore. After that, the rest was history.

In the present, Sam was snapped out of his trance by Max's hands snapping in his face.

"Sam, what is it? Wake up, boy!" Max said.

Sam blinked his eyes and shook his head.

"What's the matter, Sam? Were you hypnotized again?" Max asked. "You've been staring like that for a while."

Sam looked down and said, "Look behind you but don't make it obvious."

Max did what he asked, turned around quickly, and said, "Oh, shit. How did she get out?"

"So, that was the same in your timeline, too," Sam said.

"Of course, everything was the same except for the elder god thing," Max said. "I told you. What do you want to do?"

"We have to get out of here before she…Oh, God…" Cleo suddenly noticed Sam and walked over to say hello.

Max saw what was happening and said, "Remember, Sam. Be strong."

"Hi, Sam," Cleo said as she put her hands on him again causing Sam's hair to stand on end.

"Don't touch me," Sam said slapping her hands away.

"You can touch me if you want, lady," Max quipped. "Of course, it will result in a trip to the ER, but you can do it anyway."

"I see you're still with…that," Cleo said looking at Max.

"I see you're still a #$%^," Max said happily as he stuffed his face full of more pancakes and watched the scene proceed.

"Oh, Sam," Cleo said sitting next to Sam who refused to look at her. "I have felt just terrible about what happened all those years ago. We were both so young and immature. You did some bad things and I didn't react well. We both messed up."

"Oh, is that what happened?" Sam said sarcastically as he took a sip of his coffee. "I must not remember it right."

"It was so long ago," Cleo replied completely missing the sarcasm. "So, what do you say? Want to get back together?"

"Two words, Cleo," Sam said. "Piss off."

Cleo stepped back in shock and said, "You're going to die alone."

"No, I won't," Sam said finally looking her in the eye. "Piss off."

Cleo turned around and walked off in a huff. Sam looked down and went back to eating his waffles.

Max looked at him and said, "I'm proud of you, ya big baby."

Sam's only response was to smile.