10 YEARS LATER

I had resorted to living in my blanket cocoon to deal with my heartache. The stupid man had only gone and dumped me – again. After dating Dean for a while I realised that he was very on again, off again about his emotions. This was the fourth, or was it the fifth, time we'd split up since we had gotten together. Following each subsequent break up, my outward emotional reaction had decreased until I had decided to isolate myself within the safety of my blanket cocoon.

The first time we'd broken up was at the end of our sixth year when he'd gone on the run for his safety. I had understood then why he was doing it; I wasn't pleased about it – I was damned near heartbroken – but I had understood. The stupid man had found me in the middle of the battle and we had gotten caught up in our emotions in a scene where we really shouldn't have been but we had gotten back together again.

I had understood that time and I refused to understand this time.

Our next break up had been a result of tension filling our already fractured relationship. We had begun arguing over every little thing until it seemed like a day wouldn't pass without us raising our voices at each other. It was obvious to me that we were both stressed because of both of our struggles at work and I had remained firm in my belief that if we managed to stop fighting long enough to talk then we'd fix things. He hadn't thought so and had thought that we both needed some time apart.

The 'time' he asked for ended up lasting just over two weeks before he showed up in my apartment, heavily intoxicated. Seamus had apparated him into the apartment and ordered for us to sort ourselves out and that he was sick of listening to Dean's moping. And when Dean woke up the next morning, completely sober, we had decided to give things another shot.

Perhaps our next break up was my fault. I had accepted a promotion quickly, maybe even too quickly as I had no clue that I was to be transferred halfway around the world as a result. It was unfair for me to assume that Dean would be happy with dating me whilst we were countries apart and so I had been forced to put a deadline on our relationship. Of course, Dean hadn't been happy with that. He had insisted that there was no reason for us to break up over something so 'trivial' but it wasn't trivial to me. And yet I had listened to him. I had continued to date him and moved halfway around the world.

It was ridiculous to believe that the distance would have no effect on our relationship. We were both flowering in our respective careers and didn't have any time to visit each other. As the time between visits grew, so did some unnecessary resentment. We had both come to the conclusion that our relationship wasn't to last; I didn't want my love for Dean to turn into my resentment for him.

After that break up, I had been firm in telling myself that this was it. We had tried our best to make our relationship to work and surely there was a reason that it didn't work out. Even when I became disillusioned with working in a foreign country and requested transfer back to England, I did it with the understanding that seeing Dean would be hard but I wouldn't lose his friendship.

I hadn't expected Dean to contest my wishes to remain just friends. I hadn't been easily swayed and it took months and a dozen or so long talks over tea for me to be willing to do it all again. As we started all over again, I was hesitant in showing him any affection because I couldn't shake the feeling that this would end all over again. Dean had seen my hesitance and knew that each break up had broken me a little more and was more firm in reassuring me of his feelings and that this wasn't going to end.

It took a while but I opened up to him again. It had been over a year since our last break up and there had been no fights, no tension, nothing. Everything had been perfect and I was surprised to find myself more and more in love with him. That was why his declaration of 'I don't think we should date anymore' startled me so much. It had come out of nowhere, stealing the strength from my knees until all I wanted to do was collapse to the ground. I didn't think I had any more of my heart to break over him.

He had looked like he wanted to say something but he hadn't had the chance. He had been summoned urgently to St Mungo's by Patronus and he had disappeared after apologising to me and telling me that we'd talk more when he came back to our shared apartment. As if I was going to wait around for that.

When he had apparated out of our home I had begun to gather my things and removed each memento of my existence from the apartment. Gathering my things, I apparated away with them and arrived at Padma's apartment. She threatened to hex some sense into him before ushering me inside when I collapsed into sobs.

That had been last night and I hadn't left my position since. Padma had been kind to me, taking care of me the entire time before informing me regretfully that she needed to head off to work for an early start. After reminding me that she was a short way away, she left me alone in the apartment, just as the sun was beginning to rise.

As the sun began to properly rise, I forced myself to rise to my feet and looked through her fridge. I decided on helping myself to a simple breakfast and planned on making Padma something for lunch to thank her for being so kind. I could always drop by her workplace to give her lunch later.

Looking through her cupboards, I levitated the cereal box down to the counter when the doorbell rang. I frowned, looking back towards the front door; not many wizards used the doorbell. Walking towards the front door, I peered through the peephole to see who was on the other side.

The small child standing on the doorstep took me by surprise, especially because I recognised the muggle child in a heartbeat. How had he gotten into the wizarding world?

Opening the front door quickly, I looked down at the child who looked up at me. "Matt, what the hell are you doing here?"

The seven-year-old grinned at me, showing off his missing front tooth. Stepping forward, he wrapped his arms around my legs, "I missed you."

Crouching down in front of me, I peered out into the hallway. "How did you get here?"

"Dean brought me with him."

I rose to my feet when sure enough, Dean appeared beside his half-brother and entered the apartment behind him. He shut the door and I cleared my throat, offering Matthew my hand without addressing his brother.

"Have you had breakfast yet?" I asked as I led him into the apartment. "It's still really early?"

The young boy shook his head and I steered him towards the kitchen, "Dean said I needed to help him with something."

"Did he now?" I muttered as I threw the older male a look as he trailed silently after us. Matthew made himself comfortable at one of the stool. "Cereal? Toast?"

"Toast please."

The young boy stared around the kitchen, leaning eagerly on the kitchen isle as he saw magic working around the kitchen. Smiling at the fascination on his face, I made my way round the kitchen and decided to address the elephant in the room.

"How could you bring him here without feeding him?" I demanded, turning my eyes to Dean's as I put some toast into the toaster, "It's 7am!"

"You were more likely to open the door to him then you were to me," he said with a shrug, leaning against the wall to watch as I moved around the kitchen.

"How did you know I was here?"

"Padma sent me a howler demanding to know why I'd broken up with you again." Matthew gasped at his brother's words as if they had broken his heart. Dean looked to his brother with an affectionate smile as I buttered his toast, "Don't worry Matt, we're not broken up."

"Well that's news to me," I muttered dryly, placing the toast before Matthew and pouring him a glass of milk.

Dean moved closer to me then, lowering his voice as he said, "You didn't let me finish talking yesterday. And you misunderstood what I said."

"What else is there to hear?" I demanded with a raised eyebrow. "You said you didn't want to date anymore. How is it possible to misunderstand that?"

He seemed to have no answer for my question and instead of giving me a verbal answer, he kept his eyes on mine for a moment. Clearing his throat, he crossed the kitchen to stand beside Matt who looked cautiously up at his older brother, obviously sensing that something was wrong.

Dean held his hand out to him, "Did you do what I said and keep it safe?"

Matthew nodded eagerly before reaching into his hoodie pocket and handing something to Dean. "Here."

"Thanks, buddy." Dean ruffled his brother's hair before throwing something at me. I caught it with both hands and my heart sank as I stared down at the box nestled in the palms of my hand. "That is what you misunderstood."

"Merlin," I muttered, opening the box with shaking fingers. Dean crossed the distance between us, taking me in his arms. Wrapping my arms around his waist, I muttered into his stomach, "I feel like the biggest idiot."

"I bet your Ravenclaw pride is stinging quite a bit," he teased, burrowing his face in my hair and releasing a big sigh. From over his shoulder I saw Matthew grin as the tension dissipated and he began to finally dig into his breakfast.

He called my name quietly and I pulled back slightly, looking up into his face.

"So? What's your answer?"