Author's Notes: Now I'm gonna be clear here: PEARL DESERVES LOVE TOO YOU MONSTERS!

But that doesn't mean I can't make fun of her for liking the wrong condiment… Thanks to Maxaro for editing.

Editor's Notes: I may absolutely adore Marina, but Lone is right: Pearl is still adorable in her own way.


Marina rubbed at her eyes, yawning as her tentacles undulated around her almost as if they had minds of their own. Sometimes she was never quite sure if they were actual limbs or her hair… but that's another story for another day. She slowly made her way out of her room, holding her arms around her to stave off some of the morning chill. It was a bit colder in her apartment than it normally was.

She stopped in her tracks, her eyes widening as a thought came to her. The cold really was unnatural, and the only other time it was this cold was when...

She shook her head. That's impossible. After all, Pearl wouldn't do that again, would she?

No, Marina thought. She had learned her lesson. The last time was bad enough. Marina didn't like locking her up like she was some common criminal, she was far too nice to ever like doing something against anyone's wishes; let alone her best friend's. But sometimes you have to take a stand, you have to make a statement; you gotta draw the line in the sand. You have to ask yourself: What am I willing to put up with today?

"Not freaking THIS AGAIN!" Marina said, dropping the loudest F-bomb she ever had. Though F-bombs to her were relatively more tame than F-bombs to others. But to be fair to her, it was at the very least warranted. I mean, like you'd be any more reserved seeing your best friend crumpled up on the floor, a mess of mayo all over her face as she desperately shoveled handfuls of the condiment directly into her oral orifice.

"More! More! MORE!" Pearl cried as she consumed the eggy spread, wanting nothing more than to drown in the rather nauseatingly noxious smelling concoction of daemonkind. "ONLY MAYO CAN SUSTAIN ME!"

Marina put a hand to her forehead, feeling like she already wanted to go back to bed and forget that the day had ever happened. It wasn't that she felt that way often, indeed she was normally so happy and carefree. She just wanted to play music with Pearl and do her thang. But her thang was totally not dealing with a mayo-obsessed gremlin who didn't know her own limits. And who broke into her best friend's studio-apartment just to raid her fridge.

"Come on, Pearlie…" Marina said softly, making her approach. Pearl immediately stopped eating, going completely stiff, as if she were suddenly frozen solid. She slowly turned her head around and stared Marina dead in the eyes. "Nice little gremlin… can I please have my mayo back?" Marina cringed visibly as Pearl shrank away, getting up on all fours and crawling into the corner of the room. She hissed, and Marina just groaned in response.

She didn't even want the mayo, not anymore at least. Not after Pearl got her hand in it, and said hand had been shoveling it into her mouth. She only even had it for cooking. But, of course, she had to do something.

"No! No one takes the precious! No one takes! Especially not the filthy Octolings!" Pearl said, her voice seemingly changed and terribly distorted. Marina just frowned, her entire demeanor changing as she rushed for Pearl, who suddenly shrieked and started crawling up the wall, clinging onto the ceiling like she was Spider-Squid. Or something.

"Pearlie! I don't know how you're doing that, but this is seriously starting to get on my nerves! If you don't get down here right now, I'll- I'll- OOH, girl, I'll do something! Something… REALLY mean! I… swear I will!" Marina crossed her arms, staring up at Pearl sternly as she started tapping her foot.

"You'll never catch me alive, copper!" Pearl shouted back in response, crawling along the ceiling and jumping out of the open window in the main room. Marina rushed over to the window and looked out in time to see Pearl scampering along the street outside, heading in the direction of the supermarket.

"Oh… that's not good." Marina was dreading the mess she'd see on the news come evening. She was going to have to call the store and warn them. Again.