Author's Notes

Fandom: SMITE

Fan-fiction: Shape-Shifting Scoundrel

Summary: One of The Morrigan's favourite pastimes is impersonating other Gods and wreaking havoc on their lives and the people around them. Just because you can, doesn't mean you should.

Characters: The Morrigan (as a variety of Gods), Ah Puch, Anhur, Anubis, Arachne, Athena, Bakasura, Bastet, Cu Chulainn, Erlang Shen, Izanami, Loki, Medusa, Mercury, Ra, Raijin and Susano

Warnings: None

Request for thana-roast on Tumblr, who said 'I would absolutely love to read anything with some Morrigan or Belloma!'

Credit for this entire concept goes to thana-roast. I had no idea what to do with The Morrigan and they gave me this amazing idea where she transforms into other gods and starts screwing with them and the people around them.

The Morrigan heaved her travel bag over her shoulder, all ready to go. There was just one more thing to do: actually decide where she was going. She grabbed her phone, and opened up the Random God Wheel. As it spun, Cu Chulainn passed her by, knowing full well what she was preparing for. She did this most days and every day, he would condemn it. He couldn't understand how she could transform into other Gods and willingly put them in troubling situations, some with quite severe consequences. He despised the fact that she got pleasure from these activities, something he couldn't fathom.

"You cannae' just go 'round committing fraud Morri'," He said sternly, in passing.

The Morrigan smirked. She would never let criticism of her go unpunished and dealt with haters in a relatively unique way. A sharp breath in, taking in Cu Chulainn's man-scent, musky and vile in her opinion, and she took his form, morphing smoothly. As the form solidified, she bent over, hands on her hips, and mimicked him, her voice highly exaggerated, "YOu cAnNae' jUst gO 'rOuNd cOmMiTtIng fRaUd MOrRi'."

The more she shaved, the harder it became for her to bring herself to a stop. The longer she carried on, the worse she looked which was what she wanted. Suddenly, she caught herself with the blade, prompting her to put it down sourly. She did a couple of final checks: though she knew the answer, she checked that Anhur – the real Anhur – was fast asleep (lions are lazy); she made sure that she looked as horrific as possible as a lion with their mane badly shaved could get.

Sucking herself up and sucking herself in (while Anhur was a lot bigger than she was and it made her feel rather strange), she exited the room and headed to wherever she could hear voices which proved to be a bit of a chore, given the complexities of Egyptian structures.

Finally, she spotted the rest of Anhur's family and quickly backed up behind a pillar. How should I enter, she pondered: Care-free and confident, pretending not to be aware of his new look, or straight-up announcing that he'd made a change?

Bastet decided for her.

The Morrigan jumped at a scream. She had no time to recover before one of her paws were grabbed by who she now realised was Bastet. She was a sneaky little thing, she snarled.

"Oh my god. Oh my god," Bastet rattled off quickly, "Look what Anhur did!" She cried as she entered the living space where her pantheon were sat. They all stood when they noticed one of their own in distress, though they couldn't quite decide who it was.

The Morrigan had gone for a neutral expression, as a lack of a reaction from 'Anhur' might spark a more intense one from his family.

Anubis just held his snout, trying to stifle his laughter, though a few snickers came through. It wasn't out of humour but shock. He didn't know what to say, so he just laughed. He glanced at Ra, expecting to have the Sun God glaring at him but he was fixated on Anhur. His expression forced Anubis to silence himself; Ra looked as if he was seeing Anhur injured or worse. He approached him slowly, and The Morrigan had to attempt to silence herself; it was such an over the top reaction for what was essentially a bad hair-cut but she thrived off of this.

"Anhur, son, what did you do?" Ra took her by the shoulders, and Bastet appeared at his side. They both looked into her eyes, "Your mane was your pride and joy! Why get rid of it? Don't tell me it's not a phase because it most certainly is! Oh my goodness, what have you done? You're going to regret it in the future. It'll never grow to the same length again!" He began tearing up. This was gold, The Morrigan thought.

"Anhur, why did you do it? Is there something wrong?" Bastet asked softly as she comforted Ra.

Now The Morrigan could get creative with her excuses. Alas, she was interrupted once again, this time by a smooth, deep voice, making all of her impromptu hairs stand on end.

"I heard a scream! Is everyone alright?" Anhur called.

Bastet continued to stare at The Morrigan, still in disguise even though she knew it was wearing thin, "Your mouth didn't move when you spoke," She stammered.

The Morrigan shrugged her shoulders. She had to admit that this scenario would probably play out rather predictably with a game of 'No, I'm the real…' and she'd been there and done that. There was no more excitement to be had here. A snap of her fingers (albeit, rather muffled because of Anhur's hairy paws), and a puff of smoke and feathers, and she was gone, darting away in her raven form.

The real Anhur came into view when the cloud dispelled with his mane intact, though not for much longer as his family lunged for him and began running their fingers through it, just to make sure it was still there.

When Mercury was at his top speed, everything became an abstract blur. There was a thrill to be had with not quite knowing where you were or what was ahead, even though, secretly, he knew exactly where he was. At this speed, it seemed as if he was the only living thing on the planet, everything else grinding to a halt to make way for him as he did his rounds. You can imagine he was quite shocked when, out of the corner of his eye, he could actually make out a clear shape against the blur, that of a man… Of him.

He didn't want to stop but a panic was making him slow down as it engulfed his heart, making it sting. He powered through. He didn't want to give 'himself' an opportunity to catch up with him further, not knowing their…his intentions. He was still very startled. There was so much he wanted to understand about what was happening but he'd rather find out in his own time, when he wasn't preoccupied with running faster than every being in existence, apart from the entity running alongside him.

He looked down at his feet, as if it would beckon them to move faster. He lifted his head back up and found his double running directly beside him. He yelped as he nearly tripped over. It was only for a moment that he had taken his eyes off…himself and they were already level. He'd never felt this kind of terror. The other Mercury was looking him straight in the eye, a smirk that could've meant any number of things causing his cheeks to bundle up into devious wrinkles.

Mercury finally noticed the one thing him and his double didn't have in common; their eye colours were different.

He finally found some strength in the back of his throat to try and make a sound, "Who…Who are you?" He stammered, very unlike him.

The Morrigan couldn't help but smile harder. This couldn't have gone any more perfect. She had the perfect set up for in order to say next few words, "I am you but faster."

Mercury was immediately halted in his tracks, watching his double speed off into the blue horizon which, after feeling his boots becoming rather wet, realised was the ocean. He was still wondering what on earth just happened as he sank into the Atlantic.

Now, this was something to get excited about, The Morrigan thought.

Of course, Bakasura couldn't just waltz in to a fast food restaurant, out in the open, on any normal day. He'd attract more than just stares. But The Morrigan had already carefully considered the date and the location; This weekend, Manchester Comic-Con was taking place so there would be people in cosplay both in around the venue, including herself, 'cosplaying' as SMITE's very own Bakasura. But she was not here for any contest. She had her eyes set on a very different prize: a feast worthy of a queen.

Though it was true, she wasn't here for the attention. In fact, it was the last thing she wanted. That said, she didn't reject anyone asking for a photo with her. She figured Bakasura would get quite the shock when he saw himself at Comic Con.

Eventually, she made it to the food court. The whole area was her oyster, providing nobody at the counters checked the name on her card (it being her own).

As she approached the first counter, selling Chinese cuisine, a tangy scent filled her nostrils, only making her more excited for what was to come. She kept her head down, hopeful that it would deter anyone else from disturbing her in her quest. When she lifted her head up, her eyes met those of the server at the till, wide and brimming with excitement, "That is one amazing cosplay, wow!" He shook his head in disbelief, his mouth hanging open.

This was the bit she hated: talking. She always ended up over-thinking it, and could never get used to the fact that she didn't have to alter her to sound like who she was portraying. Their voice was exactly the same. "Thanks!" She spoke quickly.

"Honestly, it's amazing! So, what can I get for you? I imagine you're pretty hungry, huh Baka'?"

The Morrigan made sure her laugh sounded as fake as possible. She wanted him to know how basic his joke was. "I'll take one of everything, please." The server laughed, a far more genuine display than The Morrigan's. She frowned, not intending to make a joke. She was deadly serious, "I'm not joking," She said plainly.

"Oh! Um…So, you're ordering for the group?" The server tried to make small talk as he began pushing various buttons on the tablet in front of him.

"No," The Morrigan smirked, keeping a close eye on his reaction. He paused for a moment.

"You want these in like, snack-sized portions?"

"No, full-sized items please," She widened her grin, "Oh, and a diet coke please!"

"Uh…sure!" She could've sworn the server was beginning to sweat. His turmoil was of little concern to her. Nothing could ruin this moment. Nothing had ever, and would never, come close to this. She was about to eat some amazing food and, the best part, she would never feel full; she could just carry on, and have even more amazing food! It was every girl's dream. She eyed up the other food stands, yet to feel the wrath of her taste buds, and licked her lips.

She took absolute care whilst sliding the balcony door shut, though there was little chance Susano would be stirred. She grimaced at his disgusting face, contorted as it was pressed against his pillow. He snored suddenly, and The Morrigan quickened her pace for she couldn't stand the sound, no matter who it came from. She opened his bedroom door with haste, and quickly exited, closing it behind her. She gritted her teeth when she heard the sound again, despite being out of the room. Damn, these thin walls, she frowned whilst she morphed.

The feeling of stubble on her face was something that she was grateful not to experience on a daily basis. Her face stung as she rotated her jaw, trying to dispel the feeling. She wondered why some men did not shave.

She heard more noise, and found herself in a brightly lit room.

"Susan', are you ill? You're actually up before noon!" She heard a booming voice say. Raijin tapped her on the shoulder, just as forceful.

She coughed, "No, just wanted to wake up early, you know? Have some breakfast," Taking a deep breath in, she hesitated for once; though she was used to disrespecting people on other's behalves, she wondered if this was taking it too far. She barely knew Izanami, but knew of her ferocious tendencies. She gave her a glance and her form's mother gave her a sweet smile. She went in for the kill, "Hey Mom, can I get some pancakes?" She sat herself down next the table.

There was a silence, not dangerous, but there was an element of confusion. The Morrigan caught Raijin stretching his palms to question her actions.

"Susano, I shouldn't have to tell you what the magic word is now, should I?" Her tone was gentle, but her lack of eye contact as she placed a juice carton on the table was a little unsettling.

"Mom, I'm not five," The Morrigan blurted out, overcoming her anxiety by acting straight off the bat.

Izanami's head immediately turned to face her son, hanging at a grotesque angle. The Morrigan had to admit, she was rightfully intimidated. "Then you should know your manners by now." Keeping his head down, Raijin carefully took the carton and poured himself a drink. As he sighed, he let out a quiet whistle, his only comment on Susano's abnormal behaviour.

Izanami gracefully slipped away back to the stove where she was preparing breakfast. The Morrigan didn't dare look at her again, for she would undoubtedly crumble, and she had done know where near enough damage yet.

Raijin offered her the carton, and she took it, then immediately realised what he was snickering about. There was no more juice left in it. There was something so appropriate she could do in this moment. It took every ounce of her being, knowing she would not have to experience the consequences, to do what she did next, "This bitch empty! Yeet!" She proclaimed as she swung her arm with as much force as she could muster, throwing the carton straight into the back of Izanami's head.

At the sound of a loud 'pop' as the carton hit Izanami, Raijin stumbled out of the kitchen.

At the sound of an ungodly screech, Susano woke up with a jolt.

"Oh!" The Morrigan had made a break through. She had been fiddling with the mask for what felt like an eternity, trying to get it off. Finally, something had clicked; She had managed to shift one of the spikes on the appendage at the back of her head. She slid her hand down and pushed all three of the spikes down until they stopped. With another click, the mask became lose around her face. This was it, she thought. She would finally get to see what Ah Puch looked like, who he really was (something she may be able to use to her advantage later on).

She patted her face, trying to find another weak point. She pinched the chin of the mask and it shifted slightly. Holding her breath, she closed her eyes and pulled it off of her head, then tossed it to one side.

She opened her eyes but, for a second, thought she hadn't.

Everything looked milky, for lack of a better word. She could see only faint outlines of objects. The lack of focus even began to irritate her as she tried to adjust. She looked to where she knew there was a mirror, there so she could see herself (or, rather, himself).

Nothing but white.

"Are you kidding me? He's blind?" She groaned, as disgusting raspy noise escaping through her many, many teeth.

She then fumbled around for her phone so she could take a picture of herself to look at later, but to no avail.

She then tried to recover the mask so she could see again, to no avail.

She gave it up as a bad job and moved onto her next venture. In truth, she wasn't sure whether she wanted to know who she had just transformed into.

Medusa wrapped her tail around the leg of the chair, squeezing that instead of the phone in her hand as she struggled to comprehend what she was seeing.

"Arachne, look away for a moment," She said.

Arachne swallowed her cocktail and turned to her friend, "I beg your pardon?"

"Look away! I need to look at this with my own eyes," Medusa prepared to slip her mask off.

The weaver shuffled round, away from Medusa. She eyed the other deities in Mama Nyx's, "Don't you want to tell them to look away too?"

"I don't really care about them," Medusa muttered absentmindedly as she perused the messages on her phone. She wondered whether she was dreaming, as it tended to bring out the worst in her. But this wasn't her; this was someone else's depravity.

"Can I turn around yet?" Arachne called.

Medusa gasped and put her mask back down, "Sure. I don't think you're ready for this though."

"Ready for what?" Medusa flipped her phone round, and a white, bright light offended Arachne's eyesight, "Ew," She said instinctively. She squinted as she focused on the screen, the lines and the curves becoming all too clear.

She went to speak but found no words. She didn't know what to ask first: Who or why? To be fair, she knew why someone might think that Medusa would want pictures like these, but she couldn't help but feel offended on her behalf that someone would even comprehend that Medusa was capable of such evil. Herself, yes, absolutely, but not Medusa.

"Yep," Medusa nodded, looking at her phone once more.

"Who…Who sent you those?" Arachne said quickly, before taking a deep breath. This wasn't a situation she'd ever thought she'd be in, harbouring crude photos that she wasn't necessarily meant to see (though they weren't on her phone at least).

"The Morrigan," Medusa paused, noting her friend's confusion, "Dear, it's The Morrigan as Athena. There's no way she'd take nudes of herself, let alone, put them online. She's nowhere near that stupid."

"The Morrigan sent you nudes of herself as Athena? That's something you couldn't write," Arachne grabbed her cocktail and glanced around, casually checking for anyone listening to their conversation, "What did she say?"

"Just to do what we wanted with them, and she added a kiss. She's sent them to you as well," Arachne spluttered, darting for her phone. Medusa rolled her eyes when she saw her smirk at the pictures.

"I must admit, I'm a little offended that she thinks that we would stoop so low as to post revenge porn."

But you would, Medusa wanted to say but it wasn't worth it. "I'm surprised she stooped that low, if I'm honest." She scrolled through the pictures once more, not quite sure what to do with them, whether to delete them or to send them to Kali in case she didn't receive them (as she too loved a good bitch about Athena). There was always the risk that it would escalate, Kali also being a goddess who thrived on creating chaos.

"I'm surprised she didn't gag throughout the whole affair. I've never wanted a female less in my life. No angle of Athena looks pretty," Arachne locked her phone with scorn and went back to her cocktail, but kept an eye on Medusa to see what she was doing with this new-found material.

"For the last time, I know it's you Morri'," Loki grew tired of her persistence. He was fully aware that the being standing in front of him was The Morrigan. Also a being that could shapeshift, he knew where the flaws in her disguise were. One being her eyes, still her own, and the other being the fact that she could not stop laughing.

"I won't have you changing the subject decoy!" She spluttered, her voice quivering under the pressure not to laugh, "I am the real Loki. I am your commander and you will disapparate! I am through with you!" She held firm, but only for a moment. She couldn't be serious. Even Loki was beginning to smile which made her crumble. She had to put her hand on his shoulder while she regained her composure.

"How about you disapparate?" Without even looking, he pinched her funny bone, a sure fire way to reveal a shape-shifter's trued form. She let out an enormous yelp, a horrifying sound that undulated in tone as she transitioned from one form to another. The sound she made tickled her even more. Loki had to hold her to stop her from collapsing. He rolled her eyes at her over exaggerated display, though he knew shape-shifting made you a little loopy (too many changes all going on at once).

"Oh, you could've played along," She tapped him playfully to let him know she was alright, though she was still giggling as she straightened up. "Do you not ever just shape-shift for fun?"

"Not any-."

"You should do. I have had the best day. Like, so much has gone on but the best thing – oh my god, you're going to love this – was I transformed into Erlang Shen, and untrained his dog and told him it was okay to shit on the carpet!" She erupted into a fresh set of giggles. Loki tilted his head, somewhat impressed.

"That sounds horrifying."

She suddenly stopped, looking him dead in the eye, "Do you really think so? Because I am such a big fan of your work and it means so much to hear you say that." That was something Loki hadn't received in a very long time: a genuine compliment. Before he had a chance to thank her, she interrupted him again, "Do you want to…maybe…come out with me sometime and we can go screw up some other god's lives?" She gave him a huge smile. He almost felt bad that he was about to deny her but alas it was for the greater good.

"Like I said before, I don't do that anymore."

"But why?" She looked upon him with sad eyes, "I thought you loved causing mischief?"

"Oh, of course I do! Don't you know me at all?" He put his hand on his chest and another on her shoulder to reassure her that he wasn't criticising her, "I love causing trouble as much as you do but the last I shape-shifted, I got in trouble; I got pregnant, and when you have children of your own, you'll understand. So no, never again."

Author's Notes

This was so much fun to write. Thank you thana-roast for the amazing initial concept! I hope you love what became of it. Enjoy!