(AN) Sorry, I just had to get this into a chapter. This idea has been floating in my head for so long that I couldn't ignore it anymore. So, what you see here is a little experimentation of the idea I had. The theme may have been repeated, but I had to post it.

Sasuke participating in the Fifth Holy Grail War. If you don't like the idea, then you might want to turn away. I'll work on the next chapter depending on the feedback.

So, anyway... on with the chapter.

(((Finding oneself)))

'By making revenge your goal, he hoped to make you strong…'

'My foolish little brother…'

'He wanted you to keep believing that Uchiha was a proud clan of the leaf…'

'You really have gotten stronger… Sasuke.'

'He accepted disgrace in the place of honor and hate in place of love… and despite that, he died with a smile on his face.'

'Forgive me, Sasuke… but this is it…'

A shrilling sound pierced his ears. Onyx eyes opened slowly, blinking a couple of times to get adjusted to the bright light in his room, before slowly focusing on the device beside him. He groaned a bit before bringing his hand down in a lazy move and slamming it onto the alarm to rid the annoying buzzing sound. Then, he slowly pushed himself up off the bed, and ran his hand through his messy spikes before shooting a look through his bangs at the clock.

It read 6:25 am as he looked around at the small and simple room he was residing at, before leaving the bed and picking up the crumpled shirt off the floor near one of its legs. Throwing the shirt into the pile of clothes set for washing, he picked up a fresh set of shirt and pant from his cupboard.

He then gave a long stretch of his arms and yawned, before dreading himself with the routine that he has been doing for a while now.

He scratched his head, staring absently at the gross circular symbol that lay in the center of the hall. The previous tenant had rather weird artistic skills, he jested. His focus shifted back at the clock, looking at the led time before charcoal eyes turned to a simple necklace that lay beside the digital device. He stared at the ornament for a few silent moments before shifting his gaze away.

"...Guess I'll have to go today as well."

He almost sighed, for which he had a very good reason.

(((Finding oneself)))

Walking down the streets, Sasuke watched a few students from Homurahara School walking down the same lane as him. Of course, since this was one of the larger lanes and the main route to Homurahara school - the school that he attended. The students were busy talking among themselves, probably excited about the beginning of a new day or some trivial gossip. Seeing them all excited about the robotic kind of life they led, and mushy always felt a bit weird to Sasuke.

No matter how many times he had taken this road, and watched the same identical faces socialize with each other.

It felt out of place for him, given that he was always a loner to begin with. Or, probably he was the one that felt out of place. He seriously didn't understand what was there to be so joyous about attending an academic institution. From what he had experienced so far, he had only been facing problems since his arrival at this school last fall.

He was busy judging the social lives others led that he slightly cringed when he suddenly heard giggling and whispers from a group of girls. They apparently were not so behind him. That immediately halted his train of thought, and he didn't even need to guess their reason for the pointless giggling and incessant whispering. It was because of him.

Like he had been thinking, this was the biggest hurdle of his school life so far.

He had somehow managed to accumulate a horde of personal stalkers just by ignoring them. For some reason, that made them think he was cool and made them even more persistent. Which was odd and confusing because he couldn't relate this kind of pattern to anything else. But, at least they still hadn't physically assaulted him.

So, for now, he had his privacy intact though he wasn't sure if it would be that way for long. Sooner or later, some girl might actually wind up the courage and approach him. And that would only be the beginning of something he was not looking forward to.

That was why he always chose to go over early and still a few dedicated girls managed to follow him. Even at this early hour. Seriously, who got to school this early, that too before an hour of its opening time. Didn't they have other important tasks like flaunting over themselves in the mirror?

He sighed as he walked around the corner, and stopped at the crossing on seeing the red light, as a small crowd gathered. As he waited patiently for the green color, he heard a couple of students beside him talk about some game that has been released yesterday. For some reason, most of the boys of his age liked to play, and talk about the games. It was sort of a norm for boys while girls liked, and discussed things regarding clothing, ornament, and stuff that helped them beautify their exterior.

He idly wondered if something was wrong with him for not being able to follow with the 'trend' that was going on. Was he the only one that saw all that discussion as a waste of time? Was he always like this? Or, was it some sort of deviance from the life he led before he lost himself?

Did he also talk stuff like that with his friends? Or, the question to be asked was - did he, in fact, have any...?

There was no way for knowing if he did, or didn't. Because, when he had woken up in the hospital, he found himself alone with no one by his side. The nurse had hurried and brought the doctor immediately when she saw him trying to rid himself of the saline injects. The doc had persuaded him then, and asked his name and tried to contact his family or friends, but it seemed like he didn't have any. There were no records of his name as well in the database.

But the doc seemed kind enough because it probably reminded the old doctor something bad that happened to someone he knew. Probably a relative or a family friend who met a similar injury as Sasuke, but weren't so fortunate.

Whether Sasuke was fortunate or not, depended on how one would define the definition. According to Sasuke, being stabbed in the heart and knocked on the head so bad would not count as being fortunate, as one would normally not have those things happen to them in the first place.

But, Sasuke was allowed to walk away without paying anything, with the doc's help of course. And, the doc still tried to stay in touch with him like occasionally calling him, and asking him if he was doing alright.

He didn't know how to feel, or what to do back then. But, the only things that kept him moving forward were his broken dreams and a promise.

The light turned green as Sasuke walked blending with the crowd, keenly observing his surroundings, the people and the vehicles that had stopped. He wrote off this strange behavior as some peculiar habit that had been ingrained into his mind. Like something bad would happen as soon as he would let his guard down. Just a silly habit, but maybe he was always paranoid, to begin with.

And, since he was already keenly observing his surroundings, he did not feel the need to act surprised when one of the most annoying people he met tried to pat him on the back. Nevertheless, he allowed himself to be patted as the short and primp boy stepped to his side.

"I would say, stop trying to steal girls from me, but you would simply ignore me again," The blue haired guy grinned, wrapping an arm over his shoulder and ignored the slight twitch of Sasuke's brow. "I do not get how you manage to do it. You do not even try."

"I never cared about that," The last Uchiha turned towards the short guy, nodding at him and greeting out of formality. "Matou."

"Matou again? I thought I told you to call me Shinji, remember?" The guy put on a face, but Sasuke could tell he was just trying to entice a reaction from him.

Sasuke idly wondered if a curse had been placed on him by fate that always made Shinji run into him every other day. He knew that Shinji also had to get up early since he was the vice president of the archery club. He had seen them occasionally hold practice sessions at the dojo, early in the morning.

He closed his eyes as they continued walking down the road, "I don't remember being friendly enough to be calling first names, Matou." That guy only tried to be polite and befriend Sasuke, since he was also one of the popular kids at the school. "So, I would like it if you remove your arm from me. It would give others the wrong impression."

"You really haven't changed a bit in these last six months," Shinji twisted his mouth into a smile. He wasn't fazed by Sasuke's rudeness, probably because he was already used to it. But, he complied as he removed his arm from him. "I swear I don't know what the chicks see in you. All I see is an arrogant and brooding guy like he is carrying the fate of the entire world or something."

"And, all I see is an overconfident and spoiled brat that could learn a lesson or two from his sister."

"Ever the snide remarks, I see," He did not let Sasuke's comment get to him. "…Or, could it be that you are actually stalking Sakura behind my back, eh?"

That name felt eerily familiar to the Uchiha for reasons unknown, just like one of the ramen toppings they served here. But, the Sakura Shinji was referring to wasn't the one that felt familiar. It was only in name.

"I am just observant, that is all," Sasuke said, stopping at the front gate. Letting other students see him socialize with Shinji at school may be beneficial for Shinji, but not for him. While, he didn't have a problem with the shorter male, Shinji was notorious for entertaining many girls from his year. There were chances that one of his rabid 'fangirls' could use Shinji as a medium to bother him.

The Uchiha glanced around for a moment before spotting a certain idol of their school.

"Don't you have to annoy another person?"

Shinji did not understand what he meant for a moment but got what he implied after looking around a bit. The Matou noticed the ever so beautiful Tohsaka taking her leave from the archery dojo. His face was lit up for obvious reasons as he left Sasuke's side, "Of course. See you later, Sasuke!"

"Hn." Sasuke just walked along as Shinji ran ahead of him, confronting the said pigtailed girl just as she was about to enter the main building. Sasuke walked past those both after a few moments as he walked at a slower pace, and passed the entrance. Before he passed the duo though, he noticed the irritated expression that Tohsaka was desperately trying to hide out of politeness while she talked to the Matou before she caught a glance of him.

He may have imagined but he thought he saw her glare at him for a brief moment. Possibly cursing him for pointing her whereabouts to Shinji.

Well, what happened between her and Shinji was least of his concerns. He set aside his shoes in his locker and started walking up the stairs when he heard a loud cry of Shinji from downstairs. He smirked despite himself, thinking that Tohsaka probably decided to stop being polite at last and gave him a piece of her mind.

After getting into his class with a relatively better mood, the students began showing up and greeted each other with enthusiasm. Few of them even tried to greet him, but he was busy staring out of the window and lost in his thoughts to really care. It wasn't before long the class filled up and the overly enthusiastic homeroom teacher entered and began teaching. Sasuke again didn't really pay any attention to what was taught, as the clouds seemed far more interesting to him than what Fujimura sensei taught.

It was pointless studying all that, he felt. And, still, he had one of the best scores in his year.

He was already very good at Japanese. Math, he felt pointless and English came to him naturally. History was just plain boring to him and he curb stomped everyone for some reason in PE.

In fact, his PE teacher had been so impressed with him that he proposed to mentor him personally for finding his ideal sport and help him excel in order to win prizes and awards on a national level. Upon Sasuke's immediate rejection, he just tried convincing again. But, when Sasuke stayed impassive and did not show even an ounce of interest, he had muttered something along the lines as a complete waste of talent.

His PE teacher wasn't completely wrong though. Sasuke did feel that every other student was considerably weaker than him and had lesser stamina than him. But, that only increased his popularity among the girls seeing as he had rejected a proposal from their famous PE teacher, who was a big shot in his younger days.

Girls thought it was cool for some reason. To them, this totally uncaring attitude only made him more want-able.

This made him sigh heavily at the thought, earning an odd look from his shared voice buddy that sat behind him. This was bad. It was only morning in time, and he was already sighing and already exhausted. Made him question literally why he bothered to attend today.

(((Finding oneself)))

It was a monotone process as the bell rang and teachers shifted and taught the same thing again and the whole process repeats, Sasuke felt as he stopped at the vending machine outside the building. Popping in some coins, he pressed the red button labeled 'coke' and picked up the can, as he glanced at the entrance of the club not far from him.

With its doors always open, and situated outside the main building due to the activities held by it. The archery club.

Archery club was one of the few clubs he hadn't touched since his entry into this institution. Probably because Sasuke did not want a repeat of what happened with the Kendo club. To this day, the male members of the Kendo club give him a dirty eye whenever he entered their sight. He probably should have held back on them when he gave his trails...

And knowing that Shinji was a key member of the Archery club, he did not even want to imagine what would happen if he had tried out for this club.

He knew he was always good with a bow and arrow. Probably because he trained a lot when he was younger, or he was ridiculously good because of his dormant talent. The latter reason would mean that he was a true prodigy. But, he did not feel the need to enroll in it or demonstrate his abilities. Because honestly, he didn't know how that skill could be useful in the peaceful society that they were living in currently.

The society that consisted of much more dangerous weapons than bow and arrow like guns, grenades.

He took a sip as saw a young girl with purple hair, clad in a kimono kind of dress that the archery club wore, walk towards the vending machine. He moved away from the machine without her saying anything, and gave her way to use it. The girl got into his previous spot, and popped a few coins and helped herself with a drink.

She then bowed slightly and gave a silent thanks, before going back to the archery club.

Sasuke wordlessly watched as she headed back into the archery club in short steps, and was no longer visible to him.

That girl was Matou Sakura. With such politeness and humility, and the kind smile she sported on her face, Sasuke had a hard time imagining her as Shinji's sister. Well, whatever he thought. It wasn't exactly uncommon for siblings to be total opposites of each other.

He shrugged, before deciding to be on his way as he was already getting late by 30 minutes. He blamed it mostly on Shinji this time for his lack of time sense, seeing as he managed to get a hold of him again since they were in the same class. He was whining like an idiot about how he would take revenge on Tohsaka for humiliating him in front of everyone.

Sasuke had wanted to point out that it was Shinji's own fault, and many students had not witnessed his apparent humiliation but decided against it.

He was already late for his part-time job and was already getting migraines of his very angry manager.

He worked at many places, like fast food centers and the one where he had to go now was a postal office. His duty was to care of the incoming packages and sort it out for the delivery man to take it later.

It was monotone and totally uninteresting, he knew. But, he had no complaints regarding the job, as it allowed him to get through the whole month. The pay was good enough too, there really wasn't any point complaining.

But, he just didn't know how much his fate would change because of this unexpected tardiness on that particular day.

In the hindsight, Sasuke probably should have thanked Shinji.

(((Finding oneself)))

Tohsaka Rin decided her day couldn't get any worse.

First, she woke up early because for some reason all the clocks in her house had been reset to an hour early. As a result, she arrived at the school an hour early, which wasn't like her at all. Then as if fate decided to mock her, Shinji somehow got whiff of her early arrival and found her, which she found quite annoying.

And, finally the man she hated the most decided to call her today of all days… well, left a voice mail to be exact. But, still hearing his voice was enough to make her entire demeanor from partially cheery to sullen. That man wasn't exactly evil… but she just didn't feel comfortable enough around him, as he always sent shivers down her spine whenever they were in the same room.

He was also the one to teach her magecraft after her father passed away ten years ago. Still, she could never stand him. Because that man wasn't able to protect her father after promising that he would to her. He failed to uphold his promise. That was unforgivable in her books, as it also left her mother devastated.

Still, since he was an overseer in this war, she supposed she could hear what he had to say. Still dreading about it, she pressed the button almost involuntarily and allowed his message to be processed.

"It's me."

That was just like him to start a conversation. She looked off to her side as she slightly clenched the bag in her hand and prepared herself as the message continued.

"As I am sure you are aware, tomorrow is the deadline, Rin. I insist that you start taking this seriously soon." She just stared with no expression at the landline as the message paused for a bit to let her think about it. "Only three openings remain; the knight classes – the Archer, Saber, and Lancer classes. The ranks of the masters should be filled without delay."

Of course, she knew that. Since she was the heir of the Tohsaka household after all. She also felt like it was her responsibility to fulfill her father's wishes he had for the grail. Since it was the least she could do to honor her father and his name. Plus, it had always been the dream of the Tohsaka house to win the grail... the dream that had been left unfulfilled for so long.

"Summon your servant and establish your command spells immediately." The message seemed to order. "Of course, if you do not wish to participate in the Holy Grail war, that is a different matter. If you value your life, seek shelter with the church-"

She cut the line and didn't allow the message to be completed. She scoffed lightly, thinking he was just plain mocking her now, "I know what I have to do. You don't need to tell me."

She felt a burning sensation at that moment like something was engraving onto her right wrist, which she did not bother looking down to confirm. It was the command spells, something that identifies her as a master and one of the participants in the coming Holy Grail war.

(((Finding oneself)))

"Since you were pretty late, I suggest you take up the responsibility and hand this package personally. Right now!" The short old man ordered.

Sasuke could only frown at that. "Come on, I already worked for an extra hour to make up for it." He said and looked around to get his point across. Most of the staff had already left and gone home. "Are you sure you aren't pushing it onto me since you have no else to deliver it for you at the moment?"

"Shut up!" The manager hated whenever the kid seemed to get smart and cocky. "Just take this package to the address on it, will ya? It is very important that they reach this at the earliest. Do you understand?"

Sasuke just sighed. It seemed like he had no other choice. "Fine."

The old guy handed a casket-sized brown parcel to Sasuke and warned in a stern tone, "Remember! Misplacing this package will cost you your job! Tread this carefully!"

"I will," Sasuke said taking it in his own hands. He saw multiple stamps all across the brown package. Probably was an international package, and got here from another country. That was why his usually bitchy manager was being even bitchier and was constantly stressing on the need to deliver it immediately. He was tempted to say deliver it on your own, but decided against it and left the place without sparing a glance at the address.

He only got to check the address after reaching outside under the street lights, and he couldn't believe his luck. "Again?" He groaned.

Or, misfortune…

This must be like the nth time he was going to meet Shinji in a day alone. Because the package read 'To Matou Zouken,' and the address of Matou residence was specified. Which appeared to be far away from his curr place.

It was already late night, close to twelve and he wasn't in the mood to take it that prick's house, seeing that idiotic smug of his again. Even if it was addressed to that particular idiot's grandfather.

"I suppose I could just hand it to him in the school tomorrow." He mumbled, before deciding to go in his house's direction instead. He went to the sub, and boarded the train that was supposed to take him to his home, and got down at his stop. The rest of the journey to his apartment was by walk.

Stuffing his hands into the pockets of his long black coat, he let out a chilly breath. It was starting to get cold around the area, and he guessed that winter was probably around the corner. A drink might help him.

Of course, he couldn't let his school know of this, since he was still underage, and would probably be stripped of the scholarship with which he was enrolled. Attendance was also checked when issuing the scholarship, so in a way, he was forced to attend it... almost daily.

And, speaking of drinking, his phone began to ring suddenly, playing rock music.

He took it out of his breast pocket, and a frown made it to his face as he stopped walking and read the number. It was the drunk doc… again.

The doc had been doing this occasionally, where he would inquire how he had been doing. And, then he would rant like how an old person behaves and tries to preach to Sasuke. But, the Uchiha supposed he could listen to the doc, who let him off the hook and even helped him register his identity ever since he woke up in the hospital.

He was also the one who enrolled him into this school, by allowing him to take up the test. Sasuke supposed he was more than in debt to the doc.

Another ring went by, as he sighed and picked up the call. He waited for a moment, before talking into the receiver, "...Hello?"

"Ah… and here I was afraid you were gonna hang up like usual!"

Sasuke continued walking, "You know I have never hung up on you, doc."

"Just joking, just joking… Geez, learn to take a joke, young man."

His brow twitched slightly. While the doc had always been kind and friendly, he always tried to tease him about the need to loosen up. The doc liked to see himself as his guardian, while Sasuke had never asked him to. On any day, he probably would have felt grateful about that…

But, lately, the nightmares he had been having made his whole mood sour for most of the time. He had been getting repeated flashes of a woman with long black hair, and a stout, stern man with black hair. And, their dead and slashed bodies lying over one another…

He had no doubt that they were probably his parents… or, his aunt and uncle given the resemblance. That was the reason he tried to focus on the most trivial things, to take his mind off that particular and gruesome images.

That little reminder he had again, made his already sour mood to even more bitter. He was in no mood for a cheery chat. "Tell me, why did you call?"

"Why are you so edgy…? Had a fight with your girlfriend?" The older voice joked from the other side.

His burrows folded even more. "If it is nothing, then I am hanging…"

"No!" The voice on the other end said quickly, causing Sasuke to raise his eyebrows slightly. "You are probably upset about something. I shouldn't have pried. Sorry. I… just called… because…"

Sasuke waited but received no reply for a few seconds. Which was quite unlike the doc. "…What happened?" He asked, changing his voice to a more softer tone.

"…And here I thought you didn't like showing any kind of emotion because you think of it as a weakness."

Sasuke ignored that little jab, "No, what happened?"

"…"

"…"

He heard the old man sigh heavily on the other end, "…you know that I think of you as my son, right?" The doc said, at last, trying to mask his concern with a lighthearted tone.

The doc was probably drinking if he brought that up. He was probably thinking about his lost son...

The doc had already told him the story of how he lost his family ten years ago, over a drink. The old doctor had gone upstate for some conference, leaving his family behind. He only had his son with him and left him in his maid's care, his wife having passed many years ago. A serial murderer was on the prowl then but wasn't caught as many more strange things were happening in the town back then.

The serial killer's targets were mainly women and children. His son was also one of his victims, his body mutated beyond recognition in a forest, near a castle. His maid's body was found in his mansion.

This was shortly before what the doc called 'The dark period' the town ever saw, with many thousands dying later in a catastrophic event which no one knew how it happened to this day.

That was right, the doc said his son died probably around this time, ten years ago. So, that was why…

"…if he was alive, he would have been your age now."

Sasuke didn't need to know who the doc was talking about. He had probably called to check up on him, to reaffirm if he was still alive, living somewhere. Safe and sound... unlike what happened to his son.

Sasuke's bitterness was slowly fading away, and he found himself saying, "Thank you, doc."

"What are you thanking me for, young man? You are the one who is making it happen on all on your own! I just did what any responsible old man might have done…!" The old voice tried to mask indifference and tried to change the subject. "You are getting soft, Sasuke. But, maybe it's because of your girl. If so, be sure to send her my thanks."

"…I will."

"Right… wait!? Does that mean you really-"

"Goodbye, doc." Sasuke cut off the line before the doc decided to meddle into his non-existent romantic life. But, still… it felt nice to have someone to talk to sometimes. Even if the doc was annoying at times.

He opened the lock of his apartment and went in, closing the door behind him. On switching on the lights, he came face to face with the weird design that took a majority of his floor.

The owner said that the police had decided to draw it with chalk, what was previously supposed to be drawn with human blood. Then, one of the previous tenants decided to make it permanent with graffiti and as a result, it was left that way.

He couldn't really complain much since that previous crime scene was what allowed him to get this place for cheap. The same crime scene, whose murderer was the one who took the life of the doc's son. This place, his apartment was apparently another one of the psychopath's crime scenes.

If Sasuke didn't know any better, he would have tried to hunt this mass murderer down as a way of repaying his debt to the doc. But, it was stated in the news that the murderer was also found dead on a bridge, with a bullet shot to the gut and to the head. Ten years ago. Apparently, someone had given this maniac his due karma.

In the same way, he should be going after the man in his dreams.

The last Uchiha winced as a flash of red flashed before his eyes at that thought, the pain suddenly chorusing through his entire body. He placed his left palm over his left eye, as his legs suddenly gave away, bringing him to his knees right in the middle of the circle. He felt the same stinging pain again in his eyes, as he again began seeing a series of images again of dead people completely loitered around in a compound, alley, and streets.

Admist the images, he could hear a clear voice. A cold whisper from his dreams.

"You don't have enough hatred."

The package dropped from his arms, as he clenched his right arm, digging his fingers into the palms of his hand. He was clenching so tightly that, if his nails were a bit sharper, they would have drawn blood by now.

If only he knew what happened to him! If only he knew what happened to his parents and who his dream's psychopath was! If only… he remembered everything… he wouldn't have to go through the death of people closer to him...!

That was when the grail decided to select the sixth master for the Holy Grail war. His desperate pleas were heard.

Sasuke suddenly felt like someone was burning and imprinting something on the back of his right hand, as he watched through the stinging pain in his eyes. Three red dots appeared, shaped to chase after each other appear in a circle on the back of his hand.

He momentarily forgot the stinging pain in his eyes, as he gripped his right hand, just below the wrist tightly with his left hand.

"What the…!"

(AN) That's it for the first chapter. And, by the way, the 8th episode of Fate/Apocrypha was LIT! If you haven't watched it, do watch it.