Hey, guys. This has been sitting in my writing folder since last Friday and honestly, I wasn't going to post it. I know Ariliza is (probably) done, but I feel like some people need some sort of ending, or not, for them. I've no idea where this fic will go but it won't be updated as quickly as my others, and it won't be as long as my others. Like I said, it's more of an ending for the people who want it.

It also isn't necessarily an Ariliza or a Carizona fic. It's more of an Arizona dealing with her situation fic. Both Eliza and Carina will be in it, but since it relates to the outcome of Ariliza, it will be those characters POV that I use.

I own nothing. All characters/storylines belong to Shonda. I'm simply 'borrowing' them.

Chapter One

ELIZA'S POV

I've sat in a hotel room for the past week. I don't know why I'm here or why I even checked in, but I did and I don't know what to do with my life. I don't know what to do with my relationship. Arizona deserves answers, but I don't have any. I don't have anything acceptable to say to her. I walked away from her and it really is as simple as that. She doesn't deserve that. She doesn't deserve to be walked out on. That's happened to her before, and I told her I wasn't that kind of person. I told her I was the one who could make her happy. I told her I wanted to wine and dine her...spend our evenings together...travel to work together. We did that, but I still walked away. I don't know how to figure out what I'm doing with my life. I mean, I've just packed up my apartment and left. Does she even know? Does she even care? I don't imagine she would since I've just hurt her. She is probably glad to see me gone. Everyone in that damn hospital is glad to see the back of me. I mean, should I have given up on that place a soon as I got there? Probably. Had I done that, though, I probably wouldn't have ever gotten close to Arizona. Every cloud, huh?

My cell in my hands, I toy with it and think about sending her another message. I sent her one last night asking if we could talk, but she hasn't replied. I tried calling but it sent me straight to voicemail. She's probably thrown herself into her work, so I don't expect to hear back from her immediately. She's probably sleeping. I know how much she loves to climb into bed after a killer shift. I know how she likes to take a quick shower...and head straight for bed. Usually with a hot chocolate in her hand and a little Iight reading. I used to love watching her settle down for the night. I hate that we didn't get to do it more often. Conflicting schedules, as usual.

Deciding that it's now or never, I unlock my cell and hit the message tab. A blank message ready and waiting for my words, I take a deep breath and tap my fingers on my screen. My fingers that used to lace with Arizona's.

Are you getting my messages? If you are, and you don't want to speak to me...I just want you to know that I'm sorry. Eliza x

Releasing the breath I've been holding, I hit send and wait for a response. Honestly, I don't expect to hear from her, but she is a good person so I hope she will at least give me five minutes to grovel and tell her how sorry I am. Why did I walk? I don't know. Humiliation? Embarrassment? The fact that I got fired? I know they all hate me at the hospital and I guess I was worried that Arizona would feel the same way. I guess I expected her to turn her back on me and call us off. They are her friends, after all. They are her extended family. Her go-to people. If she sided with me, it would only cause issues and I really don't want that for her. I don't want her to feel like she has to choose one or the other. I just, I don't even know anymore. I don't know where I go from here and I don't like it. I don't like not having control over my own life. I don't like wondering what my future holds. I thought it held Arizona. I thought it held an awesome relationship and an amazing life together...clearly I was wrong since I messed that up a week ago.

I'd call my mom and ask her opinion but she will be just as disappointed in me as I am in myself. So, no...my mom is a no go. Honestly, I don't have anyone else to turn to. The only person I was kinda close to was Steph. Steph...the girl who I almost got killed. I mean, I stand by the fact that Richard should never have allowed her back so soon after her lame attempt at counseling, but I've had a week to think about it and yeah…I could have informed the powers that be that she was missing. I'm sure others did, but since everyone is blaming me, I may as well blame myself, too.

Slumping back down into the bed I've barely removed myself from for seven days, I try to contain the lump in my throat and close my eyes. If I open them...tears will slip out and honestly, I'm not sure I have any more tears left. I'm clearly a cold-hearted bitch, so tears are irrelevant right now. Everything is irrelevant because I hurt the one person who has meant more to me than anyone else ever has.

Stepping out of the hotel I've been staying at, the cool Seattle air pierces through my skin and straight into my bones. I hate this feeling of being alone in an unfamiliar place, but I have nowhere else to go right now. I sold my last place since I figured I'd be staying here long term. Now I've handed back the keys to my apartment here…I don't have a choice but to walk the streets and live at a hotel. Why did I give back my keys? I needed to get out. If I didn't, Arizona would have found me and I don't know what I would have said to her. I don't know what she would have said to me. A week later and I'm desperate to see her. A week later and I know I've made the biggest mistake of my life walking away from her. From us. From everything that could have been. I've made a terrible mistake, and I hope to god I can somehow fix this. I hope I can try and make this better in some way.

Heading down a familiar street, I glance at my watch and it's almost 7 pm. I'm about to head into Joe's, but I don't expect to see Arizona there. She rarely drinks out alone, and she may even be working right now. My hope is that I may bump into April. She was always polite and civil to me, and she knows Arizona pretty well. She may decide that she wants nothing to do with me, too, but I'm willing to try if it means I can find out how Arizona is feeling. If I have to beg and plead with someone close to her, I totally will.

That familiar atmosphere hitting me as I step through the doors to the bar, it's pretty quiet right now. A few guys playing darts in the corner of the room, I don't recognize any of them. That can only be a good thing. Heading further inside, I shrug my jacket from my shoulders and hang it in its usual spot. I can hear the familiar voice of Alex Karev at a nearby table but I don't imagine he would want to hear anything I have to say. Sighing, I pull my body up onto a stool and grab the attention of the bartender. Ordering myself a shot of tequila and a neat whiskey, I'm going to need all of the liquid courage I can get before I even attempt to hold a conversation with anyone from the hospital.

My heart stopping as I catch sight of familiar blonde hair, I turn away from her in my seat and take a minute to breathe through the feelings I have right now. I didn't expect her to be here tonight. I didn't expect to have to come face to face with her as I walked through the door to this bar. I thought she would be home, probably talking with Sofia, but no…she's here. She's here and I feel like my heart is about to collapse into my stomach. Ending my life forevermore. The bartender placing my drinks in front of me, I glance out of the corner of my eye and breath a sigh of relief when I find that Arizona hasn't noticed me. I should leave, I know that…but she's so close to me right now. So close that I can smell that familiar perfume she always wears. So close that I can almost hear her soft breathing.

Turning in my seat ever so slightly, I study her profile and she seems…okay? I can't quite describe the look on her face, but she doesn't look sad or upset. She is in her own world, but I'm happy that she is okay. I mean, I don't expect her to miss me as much as I miss her, but she doesn't even look a little messed up. It makes me feel a little better to see her like this. If she never wants to speak to me again, at least I know that she is doing okay. At least I know that I haven't hurt her to the point where she is drowning her sorrows at home. At least it's only me who is hurting.

Knocking back my tequila, I enjoy the rush and the burn it provides as it slips down my throat. I've avoided alcohol whilst being at the hotel. Simply because I'd have drunk myself into oblivion and that wouldn't have done me any favors. Once I start that downward spiral, I'll never stop. Once I get that taste sitting alone in a hotel room…that will be the only thing on my mind. I don't want to sit and cry over the mess I've made of my life. I don't want to sit and worry about where I'm going next. I don't have a plan and I don't have a future. Who will hire me once they know I've been fired? Who will hire me once Miranda Bailey spreads her words of hate about me? No one, that's who.

Smiling as I watch Arizona sip on her usual drink, I suddenly feel the need to head over to her. I know she will probably scream at me and make a fool out of me, but I'm willing to take that risk if it means I get to breathe the same air as her. I'm willing to take that risk just in case there is a slim chance that she may one day forgive me. It's clear now that she is avoiding my calls and my texts, but she is only giving me what I gave her…nothing. She is only avoiding me like I avoided her when she just wanted answers.

Turning fully in my seat, I take my whiskey in my hand and glance down at my outfit. I'm not looking amazing right now, but getting Arizona's attention was never my plan for tonight. Seeing her was never in my plans. My left foot hitting the tiled floor beneath me, my ass barely lifts from the seat when I find a woman heading Arizona's way. Stopping myself from going any further, I watch as her lips attach to my 'what I thought' girlfriend's neck and my body shudders. I don't think I've ever really experienced this feeling. Complete heartbreak. Devastation. Hurt. I know I did the wrong thing in walking away from her, but a week? It has only been a week. My body doesn't feel like it belongs to me right now. Nothing is real. Any sounds I'm hearing are dulled. Like, I'm underwater. My legs are refusing to work. My eyes, fixed firmly on the woman I wanted to tell 'I love you' to. I can't do this. I can't watch this. It is complete torture. Complete torture brought on by myself.

Judging by the smile on Arizona's face, she hasn't just met this woman. This woman has been around for some time. More than once, that's for sure. I don't know how long, but I don't like it. Her arms wrapping around her waist, she whispers something in her ear and it's not English. She's not American. She's…Italian? How could I ever compete with a woman like that? She just oozes sex and fun. She oozes everything I don't. Arizona's eyes closing, she throws her head back and laughs that infectious laugh she has. The laugh I was quickly falling in love with way before I should have.

Catching the attention of the bartender, I place an order and scribble down a note on a napkin. Bringing me my drink, I ask him to wait for a moment whilst I sign my name.

I'm happy for you. She is beautiful. - Eliza x

Handing him the folded napkin, I motion for him to place it down in front of my now ex-girlfriend with the drink and stand. Grabbing my jacket, I shrug it on and take my purse from the counter. Throwing down some bills, I give my ex-girlfriend a glance and head for the door. My palm placed flat on the glass separating me from the street, I take one final look and she has the napkin in her hand. Her head shooting up, the other woman's hands still on her body, she finds my eyes and I drop my gaze. Stepping out onto the street, I hear her call my name but I don't look back. Quickening my pace, my lungs burn and my head hurts. My heart is absolutely breaking right now. I'm not sure I'll ever experience this pain again in my life. Everything about me being in Seattle is totally wrong. I have to leave. I need to leave.

Arizona no longer has room for me in her life, and that's okay. It's okay because I only have myself to blame for this. Nobody asked me to walk away. Nobody asked me to leave the one woman I saw a future with, but I did…and now she's moved on. "ELIZA!" Her voice piercing through the quiet Seattle evening, I shake my head and the tears fall. They fall faster than they ever have.

Move on, Minnick. Move on…

So, do you guys want more of this or?

Reviews are welcome and appreciated. The next chapter is pretty much ready to go so majority rules, once again…

For anyone who is following my other fics, I'm working on 'Hiding My Heart' and 'Don't Forget To Remember Me'. Updates soon, hopefully.