Craig had read books and seen movies where they had those cheesy romances, and something threatened the person that the protagonist loved. Their whole world falls apart, time seems to stop, and nothing makes sense anymore.

What a load of bull.

'Come on, you've got to do something.' Stan yanked him out of his seat.

'What the-'

'Come on, Craig,' Stan rushed, pulling him down the hall.

'What is it?' Craig asked, mourning the lunch that he was abandoning.

'Tweek and Clyde are fighting,' Stan replied. 'You gotta break it up.'

'Me? Why me?' Craig sighed. Then, after a minute, 'Is Tweek winning?'

They turned the corner to see a huge crowd of students blocking the way. Stan and Craig pushed through to the front. Tweek was on top of Clyde, throwing punch after punch after punch. Craig couldn't help but smirk. Of course Tweek was winning.

'Say it again!' Tweek screeched, landing another punch on Clyde's nose.

'What are they fighting about?' Craig asked, hesitant to step in.

'Clyde called him a pussy,' Kyle said, jumping up and down as Tweek thrashed at Clyde with the ferocity of a wild animal.

'That's it?'

'It was kind of… more than that, dude,' Kyle said. 'Like, he's a pussy for being gay, and dating you, and being submissive, and having anxiety, and… I mean, Clyde basically attacked Tweek's entire life. I know I'd be pissed.'

'Aren't you gonna stop them?' Stan asked.

'Ehhh…' Craig half-smiled. 'I'm not his keeper.'

'You're his boyfriend,' Stan said. 'That means you're his keeper. That is literally what you are.'

'Untrue.'

Craig flinched as Clyde delivered a swift punch to Tweek's stomach to wind him. He used the opportunity to smack his fist against Tweek's face, and blood dripped from his split lip. Craig went to take a step forward but faltered.

'Do something,' Stan said.

'If I rescue him, Clyde will just see him as more of a coward,' Craig muttered.

'Fine.' Stan rolled his eyes and turned to watch the show. 'He's not my boyfriend.'

Clyde was on top of Tweek now, grabbing his hair and trying to smash his head against the floor. Tweek screamed, kicking his legs, but he wasn't able to get free.

'Fuck,' Craig breathed, then took a step forward. There would have been a time when he would have let the fight happen and just been there to pick up the pieces afterwards. When had he become so mellow?

He grabbed the back of Clyde's jacket and tugged him away, throwing him backwards until he smacked into a locker.

'Playtime's over,' Craig said, standing between the two of them.

Clyde had a steady stream of blood trickling down his nose and he'd be lucky not to get a black eye. Craig saw Tweek struggle to his feet, and though he appeared less injured, he was trembling and hunched over.

'Should have known the damsel in distress would have her prince come save her,' Clyde said with a sneer. He pushed off into the crowd and out of sight. There were moans of disappointment, and the huddle of students started to clear.

'You okay babe?' Craig went to put his hand on Tweek's shoulder but Tweek jerked away.

'Why did you help me?' he said quietly. 'I was doing fine.'

'Yeah, for a punching bag.' Craig regretted the words the second they left his mouth.

'Oh, s-so you think I'm a pussy too now?'

'That's not what I said, babe.'

'Well now-agh!' Tweek's voice was getting louder. 'Well now you just proved his point!'

'I know,' Craig said. 'I didn't want to get involved for that exact reason, okay?'

He could feel his patience wearing thin, just like that day they had their date at the amusement park. He had to keep his emotions in check. Tweek was the emotional one, not him. He had to control-

'You shouldn't have done anything,' Tweek said, glaring at him.

'Fine, next time I won't,' Craig snapped. 'Happy?'

'Next time? Next t-time you can try being there in the first place. He was saying… he was saying… you weren't even there to stand up for me!'

'Wait,' Craig said, throwing his hands up. 'I just did stand up for you and you got pissed. So let me get this straight. If I don't help you, I'm an asshole. If I do help you, I'm an asshole. Is that right?'

Tweek had flinched away when he was talking, and it was only then that he realised he was nearly shouting in the middle of the hall. So much for controlling his emotions. But he wasn't wrong. What kind of logic was Tweek using?

Tweek didn't say anything, but was glancing around at the prying eyes with tears in his eyes. Craig tried to take a deep breath.

'So what do you want me to do?' Craig asked. His chest tightened as he saw tears streak down Tweek's face.

'Stop treating our relationship like a fucking j-joke,' Tweek said quietly. Craig reached out a hand again but Tweek stepped back. He pushed Craig's chest to shove him away and Craig stumbled backwards, nearly losing balance.

'I get that being a cold-hearted, uncaring asshole is who you like to be,' Tweek said, his voice rising again. 'But I thought once we were dating you'd at least not be like that with me.'

'That's not fair-'

'What's not fair is having you for a boyfriend!' Tweek shouted, and the hall went quiet. 'What do I want you to do? What do I want you to do? Try caring about me for once in your fucking life.'

Craig was sure he had some brilliant reply to that, but it disappeared from his head the moment Tweek burst into tears and ran away. They'd fallen out before and Tweek had argued as much as Craig, but he'd never cried.

Craig didn't know if it was because he was still emotional after the fight with Clyde, or if Craig had just really, really struck a nerve this time.

'Fine,' Craig muttered. 'Whatever.'

The entire afternoon Tweek wouldn't look at him. Not that Craig was trying to get his attention. He couldn't care less. Really.

He scribbled in the margins of his notebooks furiously.

'You okay?' Kyle leaned over to whisper to him.

'Fuck off.'

Kyle straightened up and returned to his work. Fuck. Was he really getting emotional over this? No. Saying 'fuck off' was normal for him, right? It was a lack of emotion.

Right?

'Kyle,' Craig muttered, and Kyle leaned over again. 'Do you think I'm… cold-hearted?'

'Uhh… I don't know.' Kyle gave an uncomfortable smile. 'I mean… I guess it wouldn't be totally wrong.'

'Really?'

'You did just tell me to fuck off.'

'Oh. Right.'

'Come on dude. Isn't being basically a robot kind of your thing?'

'My thing…' Craig scribbled tight spirals of frustration on the paper. 'Even around Tweek?'

'Kind of… I mean, whenever you're Super Craig and he's Wonder Tweek, he's always complimenting you and worrying if you get hurt and you kind of just…'

Craig looked up, feeling offended before Kyle had even finished the sentence.

'Kind of just what?'

'Well… uh… treat him like crap is maybe a bit too strong, but…'

'Right. I get it.'

'I guess brush him off would be better worded-'

'I said I get it,' Craig hissed.

When the bell rang for the end of the day Tweek left the classroom before Craig had even scooped up his things. There was no point even trying to talk to him right now, Craig knew that. But…

Craig unlocked his phone and stared at the screen.

No. He was right. There was no talking to him when he was like this. And Craig wasn't exactly feeling ready to make up either. If he tried anything now, he'd probably make things worse. He walked home alone, had his dinner in silence, and went to stretch out on his bed and sulk.

Stop treating our relationship like a fucking joke.

Craig rolled over and buried his face in the pillow. He wasn't going to text him. He was not going to text him. No way. Tweek was going to have to give in first on this one.

He fell into a restless sleep, thinking about the tears on Tweek's face, the tears he'd caused.

Try caring about me for once in your fucking life.

The next morning Craig was tired and grumpy as all hell.

'My, my,' Craig's mum said as he chewed on his cereal like a zombie. 'You look like you haven't slept at all.'

'I'm fine,' Craig mumbled, jabbing at the bowl with his spoon.

'Do you want to stay home today?'

'Y…' Craig stopped, thinking about Tweek. 'No, it's okay.'

Craig picked up his backpack and hesitated by the door.

'Did Tweek call at all?' he asked.

'I don't think so, why?'

'No reason.'

Craig shut the door behind him and walked lazily to school. As if he was losing sleep over this. Like he was actually worried. Like he actually cared.

'God fucking damn it,' Craig muttered, rubbing his face with his hands to try and wake up.

Wasn't Clyde normally their friend anyway? They weren't exactly baking cookies together on the weekend but they were all friends. Why did Tweek take the remark so personally?

Kyle said it was like Clyde was attacking his whole life. Craig tried to see it from Tweek's point of view. If even Kyle could understand, then surely he could. He was Tweek's boyfriend after all.

He glanced up and saw Tweek at the entrance to school. He was saying something to Stan and Kyle, who looked like they were trying to calm him down. Were they talking about him? Was Tweek worried Craig was going to break up with him? He walked closer.

'No, are you crazy?' Kyle said, his voice panicked. 'You can't do that.'

Kyle glanced up and saw him, and Tweek followed the gaze. He met Craig's eye for only a second before turning and walking away.

'What was that about?' Craig asked, his eyes narrowing in suspicion.

'Uh…' Kyle looked like he was considering if he should say anything.

Stan elbowed Kyle in the ribs in the least subtle way imaginable.

'Nothing,' Stan said quickly.

Craig followed them to class, feeling numb. Was Tweek going to split up with him? Over a stupid argument, over Craig trying to step in and help? Was he the only one that saw how much he was trying, how much he had changed since he'd been with Tweek?

At lunch, Craig sat next to Stan, Kyle, and Cartman. Down the other end of the table, Tweek was sitting next to Clyde and Token. Both Tweek and Clyde looked exhausted and sore from the fight the day before, and Tweek was listening intently to Clyde, who was hunched over, speaking with serious expression. Since when were they on good terms again? Fights happened all the time at school and it rarely took long for it to become old news and for people to be friends again, but still…

'What the hell is going on?' Craig muttered to himself. He turned to see Kyle biting his lip, but if he had something to say, he didn't say it.

Craig managed to go the entire day without speaking to Tweek. He became unsure whether it was deliberate or accidental, but he never seemed to find a moment to go up to Tweek and say something. When school was done, Craig stalked home in a foul mood. It had been just one day since they'd fallen out but he felt like he was going insane. Didn't his boyfriend want him anymore? He sat at home staring at his cell phone.

By sitting here doing nothing, even if it was out of fear, he was proving Tweek's point. Every moment that he wasn't trying to make up, he was being cold and emotionless. But the last 30 hours didn't feel emotionless to him. He typed in a hesitant text.

I still love you, you know.

He sent it, then after a moment, typed another.

Please don't hate me.

He sent that too, and then slumped onto the sofa with a sigh. Less than five minutes passed before there was a rapid knock at the door. He leapt up with a surge of relief. All it took was a text, he thought as he raced to the door. All it took was for him to drop his guard just once-

Kyle stood on his doorstep, panting for breath.

'Oh. Hi Kyle.'

'You need to come with me,' he said, grabbing Craig's wrist and pulling him out the door.

'What, why?'

They began to run, heading towards the edge of town near the woods and wilderness.

'Kyle, why?'

'Clyde convinced Tweek to jump off of Devil's Point.'

Craig yanked Kyle to a halt.

'What?!'

'To prove he's not a pussy,' Kyle said like it was obvious. 'It was a joke but Tweek took the dare.'

He motioned for them to move again. Devil's Point wasn't exactly a mountain, but it was a tall, steep hillside with a rocky surface sharp enough to do some serious damage. High schoolers used skateboards and toboggans to jump off the top and slide down as a challenge, but everyone knew high schoolers were stupid.

'He has a plastic sled thing that he's going to slide on… it doesn't look safe, dude.'

'Is this what you were trying to talk him out of today?' Craig asked, running faster. 'Why wouldn't you tell me?'

'Tweek told us not to. He wants to do it. And everyone else just thinks it's funny, but…' Kyle stopped, gasping for breath. He stood up and looked Craig hard in the eyes.

'I'm rooting for you to fix things with him, you know. You two together… it means…'

'Means what?' Craig pressed, desperate to get to Devil's Point.

'It means there's hope for… for other people. It gives them courage to be themselves and… and maybe be with the person they love, no matter who that is.'

There was an unreadable expression in Kyle's eyes, but he didn't elaborate, so Craig didn't push it. Kyle took a deep breath and started running again.

'Kyle?'

'Yeah?'

'Thanks.'

They crossed the train tracks and pushed through some trees to Devil's Point. Craig looked up at the top, but he couldn't see Tweek. Clyde, Token, Stan, Cartman, and a handful of other kids all sat in a line on a log. They had blank stares and pale faces, and they all sat in silence.

'Where's Tweek?' Kyle asked.

'Our…' Stan hunched over, staring to the side. 'Our parents are coming to get us.'

Craig marched over to them.

'Where. Is. Tweek?'

Stan just kept staring, and Craig turned to see what he was looking at. His heart thudded painfully in his chest at the blood staining the snow.

'An ambulance came,' Clyde said hoarsely. 'We called an ambulance and it came and took him.'

This.

This was the moment.

Time slowed down for him, but the world kept moving at the same pace, leaving him behind. Everything seemed loud and quiet at the same time. He felt agony and numbness. He felt an anger that made him feel strong and a hurt that made him feel weak.

'Is he okay?' Craig asked.

'It was just a joke,' Clyde said. 'I promise, I didn't mean for this to happen. It was just a joke.'

Craig couldn't breathe. His hands were shaking and he felt like he was burning up. Was this a panic attack? Was this how Tweek felt all the time? At any other moment, the idea of Craig being the one freaking out instead of his boyfriend would have made him laugh. But right now… he turned and ran.

His legs ached but he didn't stop running.

Think. Control the emotions. Would it be better to go home and get driven to the hospital, or quicker to run? There was nobody home right now. Craig had just been there and the house had been empty. It would be better to run.

He crossed back over the tracks but instead of making his way back the way he'd come, he turned and went over the bridge, heading directly into town. Someone called his name but he didn't stop until he was on the same street as the hospital. He looked up at the looming sign.

Hells Pass Hospital.

He dashed inside. Tweek's parents were seated in the waiting room.

'Is he…?' Craig gasped for breath. 'Is he…?'

'He's okay,' Mr Tweak said. 'Minor injuries. They're just getting him patched up now.'

'Ugh.' Craig collapsed onto the floor with shaky breaths. 'Good.'

He waited while Tweek's parents went in to see him, sitting in the waiting room with all the emotional stability of a train wreck. He clenched his fists, determined to keep it together. He checked his phone. A light was flashing on it.

Tweek had texted him just a few minutes after Kyle had come to the house, so he hadn't checked his phone.

I could never hate you. I can do anything as long as I have you.

Craig gripped his phone tightly. Tweek's parents came back into the waiting room and sat down next to him.

'You can go in and see him now, if you'd like,' Mrs Tweak said. Craig nodded numbly and followed her directions to the room, letting himself in. Tweek was sitting on the hospital bed, his wrist in a cast and butterfly stitches over the gashes on his head and cheek. He looked up at Craig and gave a hesitant smile.

'Are you still m-mad at me?' he asked.

Craig couldn't hold back any longer. He rushed up to Tweek, tears spilling down his cheeks.

'Yes,' he sobbed, throwing his arms around Tweek and burying his face against his shoulder. 'I'm fucking furious.'

'Sorry,' Tweek said quietly. 'I was being stupid.'

'So stupid.'

'And I wasn't thinking.'

'Not thinking at all,' Craig sniffed.

'But I'm cute and totally forgivable.'

'Don't push your luck,' Craig said, and they laughed. Craig looked down at the cast.

'Is it…?'

'Just a fracture. You can stop looking like I'm about to die.'

Tweek shifted so that they could lie down on the bed together. Craig rested his head on Tweek's shoulder, surprised by how calm his boyfriend was.

'Are you okay?' Tweek asked.

'No.'

'Are we still fighting?'

'…No.'

'Did you hear I did a flip?'

'Don't joke about it,' Craig snapped, wiping the tears from his face. 'Just because you feel like you can do anything when you have me, it doesn't mean you should, you dork.'

'Sorry,' Tweek said after a moment.

They cuddled quietly on the bed while the doctor and Tweek's parents sorted through paperwork and painkiller medication.

'I'm sorry for being a robot,' Craig said at last. It was just him and Tweek now. He could be honest. He could be open. He could let Tweek in. He wanted that.

'Craig, I didn't mean that stuff I said.'

'Okay, but… I'm still sorry. I want to be close with you. And I don't think it makes you a pussy or a girl just because I'm there for you. You're the only person who makes me feel like I care about anything in the whole world, so I want-'

The door clicked open. Clyde, Kyle, and Stan all stepped inside.

'There's uh… more of us outside,' Clyde said. 'But they only let three of us come through.'

Craig sat up, aware of his tear-stained face.

'If you ever, ever get him to do something like that again-'

'I won't,' Clyde said quickly. 'I told you, it was just a joke. I didn't mean for it to go so far. Tweek, I'm really sorry dude.'

'It's o-okay,' Tweek said.

'You're letting him off the hook just like that?' Craig looked down at him incredulously.

'Yeah,' Tweek said nervously, pulling Craig back down next to him. 'I'm scared what you'll do to him if I don't.'

Craig glared protectively, wrapping his arms around Tweek.

'Next time you pick a fight with him, you pick a fight with me,' Craig warned. 'If you think that makes us pussies then I don't care.'

'I don't think he needs the help, man,' Clyde said, holding up his hands in surrender. 'He was badass today.'

'He doesn't need the help,' Craig agreed. 'But he gets it regardless. He's my boyfriend and my sidekick, and we are a couple. You can't fight him without fighting me.'

'Noted,' Clyde said.

'And I know for a fact,' Craig said, pulling Tweek closer, 'that if you start a fight with me, Tweek will fuck you up.'