Eggman is OOCed
First humor fic! I don't own the Sonic characters or Sega! If I did, I would probably waste all of the money from it on partying and gambling!
Jack: Live, with all the Sonic characters on stage, welcome to Sonic: Truth or Dare! You send in the truths and dares, we perform them on the Sonic characters! I will be your host, Jack!
Jill: Hey, don't forget me!
Jack: Of course not! This is my OC, Jill, who will be co-hosting this fic with me!
Rouge: Can we just start this already?
Jack: Sure thing! Now for a warning! Do NOT read this fic if you are under 10! There will probably be tons of violence and swearing and sexual suggestions….so this is rated T for a reason!
Tails: But I'm 8!
Cream: And I'm 6!
Jack: I know how to deal with that! AUTHOR POWERS! (turns them both 16) (teaches them "facts of life")
Tails: (fetal position) Find my happy place…find my happy place…
Jack: Anyways, to our rules! For the truths, you reviewers can make any of the characters answer any question you pose. For the dares, you can make any of the characters do what you want them to do. It's very simple! We have many different ways which we can torture these characters!
Knuckles: Did you say TORTURE us?
Jack: BWAHAHAHAHA! I did indeed! You can shove characters together into our broom closet over there (points to broom closet), you can make them die incredibly painful deaths, and lots of other stuff!
Fan girls: (cheering)
Jack: Oh, and I almost forgot. You can also throw any Sonic characters to our fan girl-filled audience! To demonstrate…(grabs Knuckles) (throws him to fan girls)
Fan girls: (screaming doubles)
Knuckles: Whoa! What are you doing!? AUGGHHHH!(is dragged off by fan girls)
Jill: Knuckles! (jumps in after him) (fights with fan girls over him)
Shadow: Wow…poor Knuckles.
Jack: You might experience the same too! If the fan girls try to rise up at us, we'll have to throw you in the crowd as a distraction. You're basically our emergency exit!
Shadow: (rolls eyes) Well, that's nice to know!
Knuckles: (being dragged behind Jill back onto the stage, covered in fan girl lipstick, phone numbers, etc., and with clumps of fur torn out) Uuuggggghhhhh...
Jill: (slaps Jack) How DARE you hurt my Knuckie!?
Sonic: (chuckles) Knuckie?
Knuckles: Quiet, you! (glares)
Jack: Technically, I didn't hurt Knuckles, the fan girls did!
Jill: (gasps) You can't blame fan girls like me!
Jack: Well, I do!
Shadow: (panicky expression on face) Wait…did you just say that you're a fan girl!? OH (bleep)!
Jill: Don't worry. I'm not that much of Shadow fan girl…I'm more of a KNUCKLES fan girl! (drools looking at Knuckles' body)
Tails: Disturbing…(all back away from Jill)
Eggman: Hmmm…all of you seem so scared of these creatures known as "fan girls". I've got it! I'll command a fan girl army to take over the world! MWAHAHAHAAHAHAHA!
Jack: (sighs) You really think you can control the fan girls? Well, you can't! I can't control Jill here from going after Knuckles! You won't be able to either! It's your stupid plans like this that make you, Eggman, my least favorite Sonic character!
Eggman: Wha-?
Jack: Also, you are such an annoying, idiotic, (bleep)-ing Bond villain rip-off whom always easily gets beaten by Sonic! I hate you!
Eggman: You-you HATE me!? (runs off crying)
Eggman: What? Why am I running off crying? That's not like me…(gasps) You're OOCing me, author! (in a whiny voice)
Eggman: Hey! Stop that! (throws a temper tantrum)
Eggman: (sighs)
Jack: That's the end of this chapter! Make sure to send in your truths and/or dares for any Sonic characters!