Let It Go

Believe it or not, spending the night crying over loss with Monkey in my arms was surprisingly therapeutic. I realised, since I can't make the person I love the most happy, I could at least honour her by becoming the man she always believed I could.

So it was time to step up, focus on my work and my character.

I even ended up helping Dan Humphrey, as he attempted to destroy Blair's engagement. As much as it pained me to find out his feelings for Blair, I was also glad I wasn't losing her to him!

No good deed goes unpunished

Blair obviously thought my new found niceties were a facade. Who could blame her after Louis had turned to the dark side, so to speak. She was set on uncovering her self-fulfilling prophecy.

Giving into Blair's seduction techniques was as satisfying as it was excruciating. Just getting a taste of her made me realise I would feel weak, but I had to be strong, I had to do this for Dorota. Giving into pleasure would have to remain just a lucky coincidence.

With Blair following me around to turn back her Prince Charming, I had to tell her the truth. In order for her to be happy she would have to say those five words I had needed to hear, to someone else, You will never lose me.

Even Nate was shocked I had told her the entire truth about how I had only turned dark because I was afraid she was leaving me. But if that's what I had to do to make her happy, then so be it. After all, I can't imagine the day I won't love her.

Time is running out

I thought I was doing the right thing, but after that phone call with Blair, all I could think about was how I could not beg her for a second chance and I couldn't take her away from her fairytale, especially after convincing her to pursue it for her own happiness. But when Dan came to me, letting me know that Blair truly wanted me too, I had to fight for her. If Blair knew I loved her so much that I'd make her child my own, then she'd believe I could make her happy.

It seemed everything I had dreamed about was becoming a reality. A future with Blair is back on the table? I could really have it all.

Percussion Gun

But the accident shook us all. I don't know what had happened during the coma, but I was determined to find out how Blair could swear she loves me and she'd never leave me and then suddenly be planning her wedding to Louis all over again.

So when Serena told me the truth about Blair doing all of this just to save my life, and even Eleanor realising that Blair's heart lies with me, I had to stop the wedding. And even though someone succeeded in doing so, I still didn't win my love back. I begged and pleaded for her to let me help but Blair was determined to not let herself become my property, which I had to respect, she wanted to do this on her own.

Of course, Dan's tricks lead her right into his arms, and I was determined to present Brooklyn's Lonely Boy for the sneaky traitor he was. But Blair was right, if I had continued to scheme, I'd push them closer together, and just as Nate said, I should let it ride out.

So I paid her dowry, no matter how jealous I was, I still loved her and wanted her to be free. I may struggle to withstand her with someone else, but at least Louis' family wasn't holding her prisoner.

Dodged a bullet? Lost the love of my life?

It wasn't easy watching Blair and Dan attempt a relationship. The Waldorf I know wasn't there, she was merely a ghost of her old self, even Humphrey wasn't the smart moral compass that we met 5 years ago. I think they both lost sight of who they truly were in that relationship and all I could do was stand by and watch.

But Blair still loved me, I know she did, even if she felt she was doing the right thing, she lead me to my father's return. I was already unstable after everything and dear old Dad was ready to come stir it up all over again.

But this time, my father didn't get in my head but rather said things that alerted all my insecurities. He was right, no matter what happened, I took that ring. I still held on to the hope of a woman who maybe didn't love me the way I thought. I abandoned The Empire when I lost her, I bankrupted myself saving her from her marriage and yet she paraded around with Louis and Dan all the while.

So when she came to reveal her true feelings, I wasn't ready to hear them. I was tired of her games and I had to start something for myself. If she really still respected me, saw me as the same man she fell in love with then she wouldn't have a problem with me building my legacy. And I guess I was right.

You can't imagine my surprise when things actually went my way, Blair Waldorf had finally come to fight for me. She's all in.

Pleasure Delayer

While things were finally perfect and my future bride had returned to me, I had to defeat my father, I had to prove to myself I could do it and I wanted to prove to Blair that she had made the right decision in believing in me. I needed her to see I was worthy, and her fighting for me was worth it.

But then I realised the beauty of me and Blair is that together we are invincible, combining our power meant we were indestructible. Everyone knows that if Chuck and Blair declare war on you, you were no match for us.

But my father was unfortunately a worthy opponent

I had no choice but to follow his orders, it was the only way to keep Blair safe, I couldn't risk her getting in danger like she did with Russell.

But my Queen of Scheme was a force to be reckoned with. She did know how to gather an army to drive Bart crazy. I was impressed, and well Dan did win my respect by saving my life, even if he did it to win back Serena's heart, it proved he cared about my family.

The worst night of my life was watching Bart fall from the roof, if Blair hadn't been there I don't know what would have happened and believe it or not Jack came to my rescue. I guess he was really in love with my mother, maybe that's where his hatred for Bart came from, and once and for all we had defeated Bart together. But when he propositioned for Blair and I to get married, I was skeptical. All I wanted to do was give Blair her fairytale, I didn't want her to have to marry me like this, but she was surprisingly fine with it, she didn't care how we got married, she just wanted to spend the rest of her life with me, and that was all the reassurance I needed.

And I gave her, her fairytale wedding.

Blair Waldorf-Bass was finally my wife. My dreams came true, and about 8 months later, Henry Charles Bass was born.

Everything I had been dreaming of since I was 17 was finally in my hands.

Blair was mine forever, and she gave me the greatest gift I could ever ask for, my smart, scheming, beautiful, fiery, passionate, classy, 1920s girl

Gave me a family.