A/N: Hello, and welcome to an odd experience. Some months ago, several writers in Discord were inspired by a color-swapped Weiss to go down a very strange rabbit hole: what if Weiss' personality was swapped along with her color? From this strange question came a series of jokes, art edits, and plot premises. So many, in fact, we decided that they had to be collected in some manner!

The chapters of this story are the various one-shots and stories created in the process of exploring the concept of "Bleiss", as we have taken to calling her: a crude, lewd, and rude girl with a rather strong affinity to a certain scraggly boy. While they may draw upon one another from time to time, they are not a cohesive story or canonical between themselves: this is an anthology. These stories, as indicated by the M rating, will be mature in nature, and heavily feature this altered Weiss. You have been warned. Enjoy!

Black Gold, by Aetheling

Being at Beacon, all the weapons, watching Yang speed away with her mass of friends: it was all too much! Ruby dizzily lost her balance, toppling back with a crash into something hard. She watched as a collection of black suitcases barely missed her face, and a shrill voice yelled from above her. "What the fuck are you doing?!"

Sitting up, Ruby found herself facing down a girl that actually looked a lot like her. Her long hair, in some weird side ponytail, was pitch black, matching a really short black dress and jacket. Ruby could see hints of red peeking out at the ends of the sleeves and skirt, kinda like her own skirt. "Sorry!" She squeacked.

"Sorry? Do you even know what the hell you did?" The girl screeched back, yanking a suitcase from Ruby's hands. She flipped open a case, pulling out a stoppered vial. 'This is dust, fresh from the Schnee mines! What kind of stupid are you?!" She shook the vial at Ruby, but only Ruby seemed to see all the red dust spilling into the air. Ruby only noticed because she felt it getting into her nose.

She had a bad feeling.

"What do you have to say for yourself?" The other girl accused.

Ruby's oh so elegant response was to sneeze, igniting the airborne dust in a tremendously loud, but thankfully harmless, explosion. This, of course, se the other girl off again.

"Un-fuckin-believable! This is exactly what I mean."

"I'm really sorry…" Ruby whimpered from under the other girl's glare, but she wasn't finished with her.

"What are you even doing here, you're just a fucking kid!" Ruby, who'd spent the last couple minutes being terrified, finally felt something building as the girl continued. She felt anger.

"I said I was sorry, princess!" Ruby finally yelled back.

"It's heiress, actually." Came a voice from beside them, and both girls turned to see another girl in black approaching, carrying the offending vial of dust. "Bleiss Schnee, heiress to the Schnee Dust Company: one of the largest producers of energy propellant in the world."

"Heh, about time." The bitchy girl, Bleiss apparently, huffed. The new arrival, though, wasn't done.

"The same company infamous for its controversial labor forces and questionable business practices." Bleiss stopped strutting for a moment. "Oh, and I suppose it's ex-heiress, following her most recent 'explosive' incident in Atlas." The girl with the bow smirked viciously as she added the last.

"Bitch!" Bleiss snatched away the dust vial, before storming off. Ruby turned to thank her savior, but saw the other girl leaving too. With a defeated sigh, she dropped down onto the ground.

"Welcome to Beacon…" She muttered. An arm appeared above her.

"Hey, I'm Jaune."

Jaune was alright, Ruby supposed, but she was unbelievably relieved to be reunited with her crappy older sister! Ditching her aside, Ruby knew she could count on Yang to let her get it all out of her system, so she started to explain and or rant about what had happened in the courtyard.

"-And then I sneezed, and then I EXPLODED, and then she yelled again, and then I felt really really bad and I just wanted her to stop yelling at me."

"YOU!" Ruby heard the horrible voice again, and she leapt to Yang for defense.

"Oh my god, you really did explode." Yang said in an awed voice. Bleiss was not done with her, though. She shoved a pamphlet in her face and started on some legal mumbo-jumbo in a tone that was furious and dry at the same time. The girl was in the middle of telling Ruby to never talk to her again when Yang finally came to her baby sister's rescue.

"Look, it sounds like you two just got off on the wrong foot." That sounded about right to Ruby! "Why don't you try and start over, and be friends, okay?" Ruby pivoted to Bleiss, totally agreeing with Yang.

"Yeah, great idea, sis! Ahem: Hello, Bleiss, I'm Ruby, wanna hang out? We can go shopping for school supplies?" Ruby didn't know why she thought buying binders with this girl was the solution to her problems, but she'd take anything right now.

"Yeah!" Bleiss cheered excitedly. "And we can paint our nails, and try on clothes, and talk about cute boys like… tall, blond, and fuckable over there!" Bleiss gestured towards a distant Jaune of all people, but Ruby never got to respond. Yang's hands closed around her head, and she felt her sister pulling her away. Yang's attempts to preserve her innocence or something were ruined by the speakers coming to life, and Professor Ozpin taking the stage.

"I'll keep this brief…"

Jaune wandered down the locker room, completely dumbfounded; how could his gear possibly so far? He could have sworn it was closer than this last night? He looked up from his hopeless walk to see that angel in black. Black hair, a black and red jacket, a black skirt that left pristine pale skin exposed. It took everything in his power not to stare at her.

She'd called him cute last night, hadn't she? He could barely hear her talk with Ruby, but he knew he'd heard that! Jaune had never been good with girls, except taking care of his little sisters, but he suddenly felt compelled to take his fate into his hands and follow his father's footsteps.

"Awesome!" He heard the most beautiful girl in the world say to a tall redhead, and Jaune Arc struck.

"You know what else is awesome? Me: Jaune Arc, nice to meet you." Jaune was hoping he'd get lucky and earn a giggle, but a smile would be just as great. He got a smile from her, but something about it made Jaune Arc… nervous.

"You again." She said; the tone in her voice sent shivers down his spine, wonderful and terrible at the same time. Jaune felt his confidence waver at the sound, but he would push on! He'd earned a smile, even if it scared him, that meant he was doing alright. Right?

"Nice to meet you, Jaune." The redhead popped between him and the beautiful girl, but Jaune stepped past her. She seemed nice enough, but eyes on the prize!

"So, Bleiss, I couldn't help but overhear your fondness of me the other day." He playfully flexed, and looking back he saw her running her tongue over her lips.

"You did, huh?" Again, the sound of her voice sent alarms clamoring in his mind, but he pushed on.

"So, been hearing a lot of rumors about teams; I was thinking you and me would make a good one. Whaddya say? Bleiss smiled again, her eyes dipped down from his face for a moment, and she made to speak.

"Actually, I think the teams are comprised of four students each." Came the voice behind him, and Jaune turned to see the redhead talking to them again. Jaune was dead set on Bleiss, but he knew it would be rude to just ignore someone talking to him. Besides, Bleiss and this girl had been talking earlier.

"You don't say? Well, hot stuff, play your cards right, and you could end up on the winning team." In a flash, Bleiss was between him and Pyrrha.

"Listen, Jaune was it? Don't you pay the champ any mind here." Jaune stared blankly at them.

"The who?" The redhead started slightly, while Bleiss stared at him.

"Pyrrha, the champ? Pyrrha Nikos here is the four time Mistral Regional Champion." She said flatly, still watching him carefully.

"Never heard of it." He said simply. It might have sounded rude, Bleiss thought it was important, but it was the plain truth. Pyrrha smiled a bit, so he knew she didn't mind, and Bleiss seemed to gain a bit of cheer too.

"Well that's good then." She stepped close to him, very close. "You were asking about you and me?" She said in a low, almost throaty, voice.

"Uh… yeah. As partners." Jaune felt the hairs on his neck stand up under Bleiss' gaze.

"I could definitely have some fun with you as a partner, Jaune." Suddenly, Bleiss was growing very very small. His back slammed into a locker hard, and he heard Bleiss calling from down the hall: "What the hell are you fucking up to Nikos?!"

"I'm sorry!" Pyrrha called. The PA announced the call for all the students to report to the cliffs, of all things, and the girls began to walk by him. "It was nice meeting you." Pyrrha said, withdrawing a red and gold javelin from his hood.

"Likewise…" Jaune muttered, hanging his head, but it was promptly pulled back up. Bleiss was running her hand through his hair, gripping hard but not painfully. Her dark red eyes didn't leave his until she passed, and her fingers slid out of his hair with a final tug.

"Having some trouble there, ladykiller?" Yang quipped as she and Ruby approached. Jaune watched after Bleiss, short skirt and hips swaying as she sashayed from the room.

"My dad did say all women looked for confidence…" Bleiss certainly seemed to like his confidence, but something had seemed off. She watched him like a wolf watched a rabbit! And had she pulled out some of his hairs on her way past?

"That one is probably a bad choice." Yang warned as Ruby hoisted him up, but they spared him more dire messages.

"Come on, Jaune." Ruby said, and the three headed for the exit.

Bleiss knew that Nikos bitch was up to something as soon as she'd heard the rifle. Sure,she could be fighting, but she'd seen how Nikos had looked at her man. Those hopeful, hungry eyes she'd turned on Jaune, and then she'd gone and pushed him away right as she was getting to the good part! Bleiss wanted to stew in her anger, but she had an objective right now. Jaune Arc.

The moment she'd seen him, she knew she had to have him. He was tall, but not ridiculously so. He was lithe, not some hulking gorilla. He had beautiful blond hair, a few strands of which were stowed in a pocket, and the most gorgeous eyes she had ever seen. When he had spoken to her this morning, though? That was when she knew she not only had to have him, but to keep him. To make him hers, and to make herself his.

That cocky smile, that gungho approach, the way he leaned towards her and how absolutely sure she would agree with him: everything about his mannerisms had her drunker than the vodka she'd stolen from Mom's cabinets. She needed more of it, more of him. She stalked through the woods, but a skidding turned her about.

To stare into the eyes of that kid Ruby.

She turned her back and kept walking. She heard Ruby call for her to wait, but fuck the rules! Jaune Arc would be hers! She popped back into the underbrush for a moment, and her heart nearly burst when she emerged from it again.

Jaune Arc was dangling from a tree like the sweetest fruit the gods had ever graced Remnant with, and Pyrrha fucking Nikos was going to pluck it. Her javelin was in his hoodie again, while she had shimmied up the trunk next to him to pull it out. The two were talking and very obviously making eye contact.

"Of course it can't be easy…" She whispered to herself, before turning back and taking hold of Ruby's hood. "At least your taste in clothes is good…"

"You came back!" the kid cheered.

"From this day forward, you will work together as Team Juniper." The initials "JNPR" flashed on the screen as Bleiss saw Nikos steal away Jaune from her again. She felt her mood worsen, watching them on the stage. She couldn't do anything yet, however, as her own group was waiting to be called up.

"And finally", old man Ozpin droned, "Blake Belladonna, Ruby Rose, Bleiss Schnee, and Yang Xiao Long. The four of you retrieved the White Knight pieces: from this day forward, you will work together as Team Ruby."

"Are you fucking shitting me?" Bleiss whispered at the stupid name, watching RBBY appear above them.

"Led by Ruby Rose!" The man declared, and Bleiss felt something crack inside herself. Yang crushed her sister into the watermelons she called a chest, while Bleiss did her best to remain in control.

As they walked to their dorms, she tired to think about the positives.

"It's not all bad. That Yang chick seems like she knows how to have a good time, even if she's overprotective. Winter was like that, too. It's fucking stupid that Ruby's the leader, but she's got good taste and Jaune's friends with her.

"Of course, if she touches Jaune then she'll just have to die, but she's young!" She looked over to Blake, her other black-clad teammate. "Yeah, no bright side there, she's just a bitch."

The cafeteria was crowded as JNPR entered, but Jaune spotted Ruby waving towards them easily enough. A brief wait in the lines, and his team was sitting down across from their hallmates. They'd had a few classes yesterday, but hadn't had the time to really hang out beyond a lightning-fast dinner. At the moment, he felt like it was a tale of two teams.

Team JNPR was going really well! Pyrrha was super friendly, so was Nora, and he just felt like he clicked with Ren, despite their barely talking. They'd almost been late to their first class, which was embarrassing, but they'd just made it! Beacon was new to all of them, they all understood day one was going to be hard, but they got to all their remaining classes and got their meals without issue.

RBBY were not so lucky. They showed up late to Grimm Studies, none of the girls had really noticed the time until they'd already finished examining a schedule, apparently. Bleiss had crushed a Boarbatusk, but the whole team had to remain behind with Port for tardiness. Bleiss and Ruby hadn't been talking at dinner, and he'd heard some shouting from their room too, but things had gotten quiet. This morning, the two semed on edge but not angry, so maybe the issue was gone.

"Things going good for JNPR?" Yang asked hopefully from opposite Pyrrha, just as they began to dig into their meals. Nora, across from Ruby, responded as she slurped her pancakes.

"Oh yeah! Jaune's the funny one, Pyrrha's the helpful one, Ren's the cute one, and I'm the smart one! Perfect team composition!" Jaune and the rest of his team chuckled a little at the silly answer, but Ren across from Blake picked up the question.

"I believe things are going well. Aside from our schedule issue, we haven't really had many issues. Pyrrha and I have similar sleep habits, as do Nora and Jaune, and no one takes up much time in the shower, or makes too much of a mess." Jaune felt a foot tap his shin, so he moved it aside: legroom was a commodity, but he was happy to make way.

"Or rather, Ren is used to the mess." Pyrrha said quietly, hiding a smile. Nora elbowed Pyrrha playfully, and the girls began to giggle. Pyrrha had been a little stiff around them yesterday morning, but she'd been getting better about it. She'd told them she'd never shared a room before, so he guessed she was adjusting to co-ed living. He felt a foot tap him just below the knee, and he looked up. Bleiss was sitting across from him, wearing an neutral expression as she listened to Nora and Pyrrha go on about laundry. Her eyes flicked to him, and Jaune saw something behind them that sent shivers through his core.

"But what about you guys?" Nora asked Team RBBY, and Jaune noticed how Ruby went a little stiff.

"Oh, you know." Ruby said looking away. "We're just… finding our stride!"

"Bleiss sings in the shower." Yang said simply. "Or she calls it singing, sounds more like screams of pain to me."

"You've got no taste, Xiao Long." Bleiss said, Resting her chin in her palm, facing Jaune. "And you also use all the damn hot water. But, at least your bookshelf isn't dirty." Blake stiffened at the words, but Jaune wasn't surprised. Even now, her nose was in a book; she probably left them everywhere.

"Our scheduling could use some improvement as well." Blake said quickly, face further hidden behind the physics textbook she was holding. Ruby looked at her boots at that, and Juane guessed it was she who bungled the time yesterday morning. Another tapping on his leg, and Jaune looked up to Bleiss.

Her delicate fingers were splayed, forming a V on either side of her mouth. Playful red eyes on his transfixed blue, Bleiss' tongue darted out between her fingers for a split moment. Jaune wasn't quite sure he'd actually seen her do it.

"I'm sure you have it down now." Ren said, probably trying to assuage Ruby. Bleiss' tongue came out again, this time slowly running from the base of the V to the top.

"We've set about a billion alarms, so I think we should be okay this time." Jaune distantly heard the words, but he wasn't paying attention. Bleiss ran her tongue again along the course of the V her hand formed, all the while her eyes fixed on him. The faint glistening on her fingers as her tongue inched by might have been the hottest thing he'd ever seen.

"Yeah, Bleiss is a really hard sleeper, but we think we could- BLEISS!" The shocked screech shattered the spell, but Jaune saw Bleiss wink at him before he turned to see Ruby staring at him and Bleiss. Or she would be, were it not for Yang's hands over her eyes. Yang was glowering at Bleiss, and Blake looked more than a little shocked. Jaune turned farther to see his own team staring at the mesmerizing girl even more intensely than Yang. He felt another poke to his leg, and he whirled around.

Bleiss was leaning forward across the table, and his eyes dipped for a fraction to the top of her dress before returning to her face. "Just letting him know what he can get up to if he ever brings that lovely ass by the room, Yang." Bleiss said, certainly not loud enough for the distant Yang to hear.

Bleiss watched in amusement and envy as JNPR hauled their leader away. Jaune was so red-faced she thought he'd pass out from blood loss, but she knew she had his attention. For a while there, she knew that she was all that existed for him.

She shuddered at the thought.

Ruby had excused herself to get some more food, really to get away from the table like JNPR, but Bleiss was on cloud fucking nine right now, even with Xiao Long fuming.

"Bleiss, can you leave off on the jokes while my sister is around? And don't you think you put it on a little heavy there?" Bleiss shrugged effortlessly, still watching her blond beauty as his team led him away.

"Don't be a fucking prude, Yang, Ruby's a big girl. Besides," she felt a devious grin form, "who said I was kidding with Arc?" She felt the stares of the other girls on her back, but didn't turn. Schnees did not care for the opinions of others. She didn't even care for the opinions of Schnees!

"Jaune. Arc." Yang said flatly. "Are we seeing the same person?"

"Okay, team, ready to go?" Ruby announced, and Bleiss heard the clack of a platter being set down on the table. The main doors shut, and her golden vision was gone. Finally, she turned to face Yang. She smiled at the confusion in Yang's eyes: it meant she wasn't a threat.

"I will ride him like the goddamn pony Mom and Dad never got me." She declared to her team, with total assurity.

Blake let out a suffering sigh, standing from the bench and taking up her bag. Ruby let out a loud "Eep!", turning a red as dark as Jaune. Yang once again acted like she could hide her sister from words she'd already heard, glaring at Bleiss as she pulled the younger girl in her wake for the exit. Bleiss herself burst into laughter.

"Oh, it's too easy!" She wheezed through her laugh. Her team expressed their disapproval while they made their way to their first class of the morning, but Bleiss couldn't care less, she knew what she wanted. Her hand settled on her pocket, where she covetously felt at a few precious strands of gold. Four years was a long time. Plenty, in fact.