The first day had come as an unexpected surprise.

Blake had been dealing with a lot of stressors as of late. There was the White Fang. Roman Torchwick. The upcoming school dance. Being a student of Beacon Academy in general. And then there were all the sleepless nights that came with those things. There were times she could barely keep herself awake and upright, be it in the middle of class or here in the cafeteria.

Ruby was talking about something, though at this point she was having a hard time focusing on the words. She wanted to continue on her quest to discover why the White Fang was operating with not just a known criminal, but a human criminal. Even more so she wanted to sleep. But she knew she couldn't do that. She had to do something. She wasn't sure what. But something.

That was when she smelled it. A scent which she had smelled many times before. One which was burned into both her nostrils and her brain. The smell of the food of the gods.

Tuna.

Not just any tuna. Northern Bluefin Tuna. Thunnus thynnus. An Atlesian delicacy. The single best thing to come out of that frozen continent. Blake would gladly hold true to that opinion even with Weiss present in the room.

In an instant her weariness had evaporated. Her head perked up. Underneath her concealing bow her ears did the same. Then she saw it. A veritable mountain of the ambrosia sitting on a plate making its way through the cafeteria. Blake's mouth began to salivate as she watched the boy holding the plate grow closer to the table she sat at.

Jaune Arc.

He was coming toward her. Not just to her table. To her. Her. Dare she hold out hope? Could this be real?

Jaune set the plate down in front of her. "Hey, Blake," he greeted warmly. She could not remember that this was what his voice sounded like. Had they ever even spoken to one another? "I remember hearing you like tuna. So, this is for you."

The blonde boy flashed her a warm smile before he turned and walked away to go and sit with the rest of his team. He had not even waited for her to accept or decline the dish. As if he knew that she would accept it with no questions asked. Perhaps he wasn't as much of a fool that other people believed he was.

As Blake looked down at the plate of tuna which sat before her, she could not help but feel just a little bit suspicious. It was too good to be true. What was wrong with it? Was it laced with a laxative? Had it fallen on the floor? Was this all part of some elaborate prank orchestrated by Yang? Or maybe this was just her tired and paranoid mind playing tricks on her?

"Blake?" she heard her partner say.

She wasn't sure if Yang had said anything before that moment. The sight of the tuna had drowned out all other sensations.

"Huh?" she quickly asked, her eyes finally averting from the tuna and onto Yang.

"Is something wrong?" Yang pointed over to the newly-arrived plate with the fork that was still in her hand. "You've been staring down at that food for like five minutes."

Surely the blonde girl was exaggerating. There was no way that could be right.

"No, I don't think anything's wrong." Blake sighed lightly, looking down at the food once more. "You don't think there's something wrong with it, do you?"

Yang waved off the girl's concerns. "Nah. Jaune wouldn't do that. Besides, you shouldn't look a gift fish in the mouth. It's not like free tuna just falls from the sky."

Sky fish was indeed a rare and legendary treat. While free tuna was by no means as special, it was still nothing to snub your nose at.

"It is unusual though," Weiss chimed in.

"Who cares! Free tuna! Dig in, Blake."

For the first time in her life, Yang was right. And so she decided to do just that. Blake picked up her fork and scooped up a large helping of the species of tuna known for its high fat content, extensive migration patterns, and who could also reach an age of twenty years or more.

It was bliss. Pure bliss.

The second day had been equally as surprising as the first, but not quite as shocking.

Once more Blake's attention was garnered as her nose picked up the distinct scene of tuna. Today it was Albacore. Thunnus alalunga. Long finned tuna.

Jaune set the plate in front of her. "This is for you." He smiled again before once more walking away to rejoin his team.

For a couple seconds Blake looked at the food, but this time she had no reservations. She had not gotten sick yesterday by consuming the free tuna. It had not turned out to be any kind of prank. It was just what it looked to be. Free tuna. Blake liked to complain about a lot of things, but she could not complain about that.

Scooping up a forkful of the white fish, she put it in her mouth and her taste buds exploded with flavor. With a dry texture and a taste slightly resembling chicken, this species of tuna was known as the "chicken of the sea" for a reason. While not as rare as the Northern Bluefin Tuna, it was no less satisfying to the tongue.

"Okay, this is getting weird," Weiss said.

Looking up, Blake realized that all eyes were on her. "What?" she asked after swallowing.

"I think someone has a secret admirer," Yang cooed.

"Yeah, we all know about Sun," Ruby pointed out.

"No, not Sun. Don't you think it's weird that Jaune is suddenly giving Blake tuna out of the blue?"

Blake rolled her eyes at the accusation. "Come on, Yang. He's just being nice. We shouldn't go assuming things."

"He does have an unusual courtship process," Weiss countered. "If you'll recall he did try to serenade me outside of our room."

With a soft shake of her head, Blake resumed eating her free tuna. They could argue about such stupid ideas on their own. But this tuna wasn't going to eat itself.

The third day had not come as a surprise at all. She had been hoping, and was pleased to see Jaune approach her as he had the past two days.

"Here ya go, Blake," Jaune said with that usual smile of his. And as usual, he walked off without saying another word or waiting for her to say one to him.

Today's dish was Tongol. Thunnus tonggol. Longtail tuna. Who knew Beacon offered such a wide variety of species?

Blake certainly did not. How had she not known?

This was criminal.

As with the previous two days she could hardly keep her mouth from watering at the sight and smell of the dish. And like the previous day she wasted little time in digging in.

"Okay, seriously," Yang huffed as she looked at her partner chowing down on free fish. "What is going on here?"

What was going on? Blake was finally being rewarded for all of her late nights and hard work. At least somebody around here appreciated all that she did. Somebody decided to thank her for everything she was doing to try and help combat terrorism and fight for equality.

It was just a shame that those people couldn't be her own teammates. Or the boy who claimed to like her as more than a friend. Sun never gave her free tuna.

"I'm telling you, this must be his strange idea of trying to earn Blake's attention," Weiss explained. "And with the way Blake is... ahem, consuming it, can you truly blame him?"

The sharply spoken word earned an ireful glare from the faunus girl. "Sfutuhp," she said through a mouthful of fish.

Weiss produced a handkerchief and delicately dabbed the surface of the table around her which had been graced with bits of tuna. "Please finish chewing your food before speaking."

She was just jealous. Weiss didn't have free tuna. For a girl who Jaune claimed to like, the heiress was distinctly lacking in any edible gifts from him.

Amber eyes glanced over to the table at which Jaune sat. Surely that wasn't what was going on. Was it?

By the time the second week had started, Blake had come to expect the daily gifts of tuna. Yellowfin. Bonito. Bigeye. Day after day Blake was continuously surprised by the variety in tuna which Beacon offered. It made sense though, the defenders of humanity could only operate on the finest foods. An army fought on its stomach, after all. And so a huntress must fight on hers as well.

"For you, Blake," Jaune said before walking off.

Her stomach was already growling at the sight of her meal. Blake wasted no time in annihilating the contents of the plate in front of her.

Weiss recoiled from the sight of her feeding. Yang grinned as she watched her partner devour what was hers. Surprisingly it was Ruby who made a fuss this day.

"Oh come on!" her leader said as she slammed her palms down onto the table's surface. "Why isn't he bringing me strawberries every day? I was his friend first!"

Blake looked up to regard her tiny teammate. She made sure to swallow this time before speaking. "So?"

Ruby looked as if she had just been physically struck. "So? So!? Do the bonds of friendship mean nothing to you? How would you feel if... if... Yang just started making puns to Ren or something? Wouldn't you feel betrayed?"

Blake regarded her own partner. She glanced at Ren before looking back to Ruby. "Do you think he'd agree to such a burden?"

"Hey!"

"Look, the point is that Jaune is my second best friend, only after my very best BFF for life!" Ruby swung an arm around Weiss' shoulders to emphasize the point, but was quickly fought off by the heiress. She recovered quickly enough and continued. "Have you two even shared a single conversation together all year?"

Now that Blake thought about it, they hadn't. Ruby was right. Other than giving her plates of tuna, she and Jaune had not once interacted in their entire time at Beacon.

It was the perfect relationship.

"So in other words you're jealous of what we have," Blake surmised.

"Ooooohhhh~?" Yang chimed in. "And what do you have?"

Nothing. Nothing at all. It was just tuna.

They were just jealous.

At the end of the second week Blake realized she had a problem. While sitting in Professor Port's room waiting for class to begin, she saw Jaune walk in... and it made her happy to see him. The sight of his golden blonde hair and made her heart rate suddenly spike. Her tongue ran over her lips at the very sight of him. She wanted him...

...to give her tuna.

Maybe her friends were right. Maybe tuna was just his way of trying to say that he liked her. As Weiss had said, he had a fairly unusual courtship process. If the was the case, if he did have those kinds of feelings for her... maybe he wasn't so bad at all. In fact, maybe he was perfect.

So what if they had never once spoken to each other in earnest conversation? Blake liked her space! He was into comic books... that was reading. Sort of. They had that in common! He let her read in peace, and she returned the favor. What more could one want in a relationship? Was it not every girl's dream to find a partner who would just shut up and let her live in peace?

Unlike Adam, Jaune was not an obsessive psychopath who wanted to destroy humanity. Unlike Sun, Jaune was not super clingy toward her. Perhaps... perhaps he truly was her perfect boyfriend. Her perfect husband. Her perfect mate.

After all, imagine the benefits that could be had for human/faunus relations if the daughter of Menagerie's Chieftain dated a normal human. It would be so much more helpful than if she decided to date Sun. Now that she thought about it, dating Sun would be racist! Only dating the guy because he was faunus? Blake was not shallow. Nope. Not at all.

Anything Sun had, Jaune had as well. Sun had blonde hair, Jaune had blonde hair. Sun had blue eyes, Jaune had blue eyes. Sun did not give her tuna... Jaune did give her tuna.

There was an obvious winner there.

Blake had not even realized that her mouth began to water as she stared at Jaune in his seat. After a few moments their eyes met, and Blake made a fateful decision. She decided to return Jaune's feelings for her.

She did the one thing she reserved for only truly special people in the world. A show of her love and affection. For someone who got her on a level that few others did, Jaune would see it as an undeniable sign that she was reciprocating his amorous feelings for her.

She made solid eye contact with Jaune, and smiled.

Blake felt on top of the world. Was this what love felt like? If so, she finally understood what the authors of Ninjas of Love and Cold Heart Hot Love were trying to convey. Love was beautiful. Love could stop wars. It could end world hunger. It could bring faunus racism to a grinding halt. The White Fang had it wrong all along. They didn't need to fight. All they needed was love. Love was all they needed.

After practically floating to her seat in the cafeteria, Blake took her usual seat with her teammates. With no sign of her new boyfriend yet, she decided to wait patiently for her daily dose of love tuna. To them it was an expression of love that mere words could not convey. She desired it. She craved it. She needed Jaune to show his affection for her.

But obviously there were a few jealous girls at the table here who were not as fortunate as she. Her own partner was one of them. "Okay, what's got you so happy today?" Yang asked.

Wearing a girlish grin that she had once read about in her favorite novels, Blake sighed happily. "Oh nothing. Just... waiting for my boyfriend to come."

Three pairs of eyes stared blankly at her. To no one's surprise it was Weiss who broke the silence with her ear-splitting Schnee shriek. Her Schreek? Blake shook her head. Careful, Blake. Don't let these new emotions of yours cloud your judgment. Don't become like Yang.

"Boyfriend!?" Weiss shouted. "You mean you actually gave in to Sun's constant pestering?"

Who?

Oh. Right. The one who didn't give her tuna.

"Oh him? No. I meant Jaune."

Three jaws dropped to the floor. One quickly recovered though, and Yang pumped her fist into the air. "Yes! I knew it! You owe me five lien, Ruby."

Ruby sighed in defeat, her head hung low and eyes gazing down to the floor. She held out a hand toward Weiss. "Weiss, can I borrow five lien?" She paused in thought momentarily. "Wait, can I borrow ten lien?"

Rather than answer, and almost assuredly deny the request, Weiss just sputtered out sentence fragments. "But- but- That's- ...how? I mean- what? Why? That's... HIM!?"

But Weiss' babbling was quickly muted at the sight of Blake's boyfriend. Like a knight riding into the cafeteria atop a scraggly blue two-legged horse, Jaune had arrived.

And he carried his tuna with him.

Blake licked her lips with barely contained excitement, and had to swallow the saliva which had built up in her mouth at the sight of the boy. He was coming this way. He was about to show everyone at the table just how much he loved her. And she would smile back to him to return the favor. If only the dance had not taken place only weeks before. They would have been able to turn heads at the event together.

Her hand squeezed down on the flimsy cafeteria fork. Lungs sucked in air in anticipation for Jaune to say those magic words to her before setting the plate before her like a tribute to his queen. Then she would feast like one. He was almost here. He was... he was...

Sitting down at his own team's table.

"Hey, Pyr, want some tuna?"

...he was a dirty good for nothing cheater!

A cold lance of pain shot through her heart. Was this... was this... heartbreak? It felt like the time she had uncoupled the train car Adam stood on from the rest of the train and watched him drift away.

No. Worse than that. It felt how it did when she got to the ending of The Man with Two Souls.

The hurt. The pain. It was too much to bear.

"Blake?" Yang asked worriedly. "Are you okay? Do you feel sick?"

Yes. Yes she did. Only her affliction was not of the body, but rather of the heart.

"Excuse me," Blake murmured as she stood from her table.

Jaune was there with the rest of his team happily chatting away. Seemingly without a care in the world. All the while, Pyrrha was taking delicate bites of what should have been Blake's tuna. What did Pyrrha have that she didn't? Lien? Success? Fame? Legions of adoring fans? Sponsorship deals? A past not clouded by terrorism and regret? So what? That didn't make her better than Blake. It just made the faunus' journey all the more rewarding when she finally reached its end.

Steeling herself, Blake came up behind Jaune and tapped him on the shoulder. The boy turned around and smiled up at her. "Oh, hey, Blake. What's up?"

What's up? What's up? Did he have no compassion? Did he have no heart?

Blake could barely hold back tears as she spoke. "Jaune... I thought we had something special."

The way he squinted at her told her that he was probably trying to play dumb. But she knew better. This boy alone had figured out the key to her heart. He was smarter than he let on. And if Pyrrha was gladly accepting his gift of free tuna, far more suave than he let on as well.

When he said nothing, Blake went on. "I thought the fish did the speaking for both of us... was I wrong, Jaune?"

"Oh, the tuna?" he asked. Blake did not know whether to be happy or upset that he suddenly remembered his romantic overtures toward her. "Well about a month ago Pyrrha and me came up with a new training regimen. It called for lots of tuna. Tons of protein in it for building muscle, and apparently they call it brain food too. So it'd help with my studies. So I ordered a month's worth of meals in advance... I didn't think I'd get sick of it so easily."

Sick. Of. Tuna? What madness was this? Was he the one who was feeling under the weather? Surely that was it. That was the only explanation to the nonsense he was talking.

"So when that happened I thought to myself, hey, Blake likes tuna. I'll just give it to her and get something else for lunch. So I've been giving you the tuna for the past few weeks. But I figured today Pyrrha might want some."

So he admitted it. Betrayal. The horrible and utter betrayal. "I see," Blake whispered. "So you'll just give your delicious white goodness to any girl? How much have you given to Weiss, Jaune? How much!"

"Excuse me!?"

Now was not the time for Schreeking, however. Blake was crushed. Completely crushed. She could not bear to be in the same room as him. "I... I have to go now."

The girl stormed out of the cafeteria, leaving a group of confused teenagers in her wake.

Scratch scratch scratch.

Jaune pressed the pillow over his head. He knew he would not be able to fall asleep like this, but at least the noise was drowned out. Mostly.

"Jauuuuuune..."

She'd been at it for only a few minutes, but those minutes seemed like hours. It wasn't the first time it had happened either.

"Jauuuuuuuuuuuuuuune..."

That poor, pathetic, pitiful moaning of his name. Full of need. Sorrow. The scratching of fingernails on the wood only made it worse. It was painful to hear. He was not the only one who felt that way either.

"Aaargh!" Nora cried out, throwing her covers aside before standing up. "I can't take it anymore!"

Stomping over to where Magnhild was stored, she grabbed the mighty hammer and held it upside down so that the handle thrust outward. Nora then moved over to their dorm's door, and a flood of light came in through when she pulled it open.

"Go away!" she said as she whacked Blake atop the head with Magnhild's handle. "Go! Shoo!"

Jaune could have sworn that he heard a hissing noise before the sound of boots on carpet thudded away.

When Nora returned it was clear she was not in a good mood. None of them were when they were being prevented their sleep by a noisy cat faunus. That anger was turned on Jaune, who was on the receiving end of the hammer being tossed at him.

Nora's hands moved to rest on her hips. "You need to do something about her!"

"What can I do?" he wondered. This whole thing was some kind of misunderstanding. He hadn't meant to condition a girl into liking him by giving her tuna every day.

"I don't know! But you'd better get your butt out there right now and do something! Because if I don't get any sleep tonight, I'm going to be a very angry Nora. And you wouldn't like me when I'm angry."

Of that there was no doubt.

Jaune got up from his own bed an went over to his dresser. After rummaging around for a few seconds he slid on his slippers and went to the door. "I'll be back."

He received no response. The silence was deafening.

Stepping out into the hall, he found Blake in her nightgown currently nursing a minor head wound she had suffered courtesy of Nora. Poor girl. No one but the Grimm deserved to be on the receiving end of that kind of force.

"Hey, Blake..."

Amber eyes met his briefly before moving to the floor. "Jaune..."

It was now or never. He produced a small cylindrical can from behind his back, and slid his finger into the tiny can opener on its lid. "Would you... like some tuna?"

Her bow twitched, and those sorrowful eyes lit up at the sound of the can opening. "Tuna?"

"Yup." Jaune moved against the wall and slid down to sit on the floor. "I brought a spoon."

Blake eagerly sat down next to him. She stared expectantly at the open container of canned fish. Clearly she was waiting for him to begin.

"Uh..." He dipped the plastic spoon in and took out a generous chunk of the white meat. "Say aaah?"

Blake did so willingly, and Jaune slid the spoon of tuna into her waiting mouth. She clamped her lips down on it happily, chewing with a satisfied grin on her face.

When she swallowed Blake rubbed her face lovingly against his shoulder. She remained like that until Jaune slid an arm around her.

Did I seriously just get a girlfriend because of tuna? he wondered.

With a soft sigh he shook his head and smiled. Jaune dipped the spoon back in and prepared to continue feeding his strange new girlfriend.

Author's Note: Uh... April Fools?

Yeah. Once again, blame Discord for this one. Just a dumb little story about the best versions of Blake: her Chibi self, and her exaggerated cat self.

Also if you haven't already, check out another new one shot on my profile called: Weiss is Too Short to do Things. If you're into that whole White Knight thing, that is.

Thanks for reading. I hope you enjoyed it.