Chapter 1: Yet Another Trip Gone Bad

In whatever life he lived, Shirou Emiya always seemed to attract the strangest people. Then again, perhaps his unorthodox mindset was to blame. Rin always did say he was distorted.

He didn't think it was just superstition. His foster father was a notorious assassin, his guardian was a hyperactive yakuza princess, and as a child his roster of friends included a monk, a prodigy mage, a rapist and… Sakura. Granted, some of those details were unknown to him at the time, but still.

Despite knowing this tendency, he couldn't help but think his two new friends were a just a bit stranger that what was warranted.

Perseus, Percy Jackson smelled like saltwater. All the time. He could be covered in chili or wet paint, both instances that he had observed, and he would still smell like a fresh ocean breeze. Grover Underwood, his crippled companion, was harder to place. His scent mingled together the forests and what seemed like… goat hair.

The strangers didn't end there. Two of their teachers in particular made him weary. Mr. Brunner was middle-aged man in a wheelchair, who smelled like coffee and horses. But behind his gentle countenance, Shirou recognized the hardened instincts of a warrior. He had no doubt that Mr. Brunner was much older than he seemed. Ms. Dodds was just smelled… bad. Sulphur and aged leather was a surprisingly bad cocktail. But more alarmingly was the killing intent that she emitted sporadically towards, well everyone. But mostly Percy.

Now, he may be dense, but stupidity was something that Rin had beaten out of him a long time ago.

It only took one accidental meeting with a dryad for him to learn of the supernatural of this world. What he found did not impress him. Gods. Demigods. Monsters. The Underworld. Olympus. The Mist. Camp Half-Blood. Camp Jupiter. It took him four years to gather that much information as discreetly as he could. It could have taken a fraction of that time, but his adopted family was rather… overbearing. His excursions were difficult enough to manage.

"Mr. Emiya. May I trouble you for your opinion?"

Shirou finally acknowledged the elbow jabbing into his side and turned his attention to the painting that Mr. Brunner was gesturing to. "That is the Titan, Kronos, eating the gods."

"Correct. Kronos, the Titan King was afraid of being overthrown. As his children were being born, he swallowed them whole, except for the youngest. Mr. Jackson, what happened to Zeus?"

Percy adopted the look of a goldfish before the answer came to him. "Ahh… Kronos' wife, she fed him a rock instead of Zeus, then she hid him away."

That part of the myth always confused Shirou. He knew that divinity did not always equate to intelligence, but he also knew they were all pretty ruthless. One would think that killing a baby would not be as reviled as eating it alive. But he supposed legends were legends for a reason.

Of course, he could admit that he was a bit biased. He could vividly remember a past conversation with Rider, one of the rare moments where she was comfortable enough to totally open up to him. She talked of the selfish, cruel and meddlesome gods. It would seem the gods here were no different, even after thousands of years.

"Ugh, all due respect to Mr. Brunner, when are we going to use this in the real world? Am I gonna apply for a job and say, 'No, I don't have any special skills, but I can tell you about the legend of Kronos and the gods!'" Percy griped as he ate his sandwich.

Grover and Shirou exchanged an amused glance. This was a common complaint from Percy, but he didn't fool either of them. They knew that Mr. Brunner's class was his favorite since it was the only one where he could enjoy class and even excel. What Shirou didn't say was that there would probably be a need for that knowledge very, very soon.

Their friendly banter was unfortunately interrupted by the charming Nancy Bobofit. The redhead had been a constant thorn in their sides. Shirou preferred to see the good points in people, but this girl was just unbearable. She constantly made fun of Percy's dyslexia, Grover's disability, and Shirou's Japanese heritage. Her most recent annoyance was dumping her culinary disaster of a lunch into Grover's lap.

Shirou immediately grabbed a hold of Percy's arm, to stop him from doing something incredibly stupid that would land him in detention. Again. But it seems his efforts were for naught.

In plain view of everyone, a tentacle of water wrapped around Bobofit's waist, and yanked her into the fountain.

Before any of them could protest, their Math teacher had swooped in and had taken Percy away for a talk. Shirou did not miss the panicked look on Grover's face and the anxiety over Mr. Brunner's. "Grover, think fast!" Grover yelped and nearly dropped the apple that he had thrown his way. "Hold on to that for me please! I need to use the restroom."

Trace on. Two words that he had relied on his entire life. Completely unnecessary at this point, but even running them through his head was its own little ritual that set him at ease. Once the rest of the class were out of sight, the faint glow of Reinforcement filling his legs. Following the scent of ocean and brimstone, he bounded across the museum, taking the stairs five at a time. A horrifying screech reached his ears and entered the grand hall just in time to see a bat-like creature leap off the side of the wall and swoop down with claws like kitchen knives.

Percy ducked down on to the marble floor, Mrs. Dodds missing him by mere inches.

"Give it to me!" The creature hissed, her veiny skin pulsing in rage. She tucked her wings in, diving forwards, but an abnormally long sword slammed into one of her wings, pinning her to the walls. Growling, she attempted to grasp the short red hilt, but found her body sluggish and numb, her energy sapped by the blade in her flesh.

"I've never your seen your kind before, but I'm glad that these work on you." The Black Keys have been his go-to weapons when fighting these monsters. While their original purpose was to fight against demons and vampires, they were also highly spiritually effective against those who are deemed 'evil'. It would seem that most, if not all monsters qualify. For example, right now the Internment Rite has fully petrified Mrs. Dodds.

"Release me, morta- "

Shirou didn't let her say another word. With a snap of his fingers, Mrs. Dodds burst into flame, until she was reduced to scattered golden dust. "It seems a normal school life is beyond my capabilities." He muttered.

He dismissed the Key and faced his shocked and awe-stricken friend. "You have questions."

"As do I."

They both turned to see Mr. Brunner and Grover at the hall's entrance, the former looking grave, and the latter incredulous. Shirou noted the bronze pen in Mr. Brunner's clenched fist. Anaklusmos. Xiphos. 0.914 meters in length. 2.27 kilograms in weight. Celestial Bronze. Wielded by Zoe Nightshade. Wielded by Heracles. Wielded by-

He tore his gaze away from the magic item as Mr. Brunner resumed talking. "This is not what I had hoped to happen when I said this trip would be educational."

"I don't know, Mr. Brunner. I feel like Percy will learn quite a lot today."

"No. It is far too earl- "

"Ok, all of you. What in the hell just happened? And will you please not talk like I'm not here? Somebody start explaining or I'm gonna start having a psychotic break!" Shirou could hear the growing distress in his voice. It was a stark reminder to everyone in the room that Percy was not a warrior. He was an twelve-year-old boy. This needed to be handled gently but firmly.

"You heard him. I don't know about either of you, but I'm not going to lie to a friend. Especially not about something this important. This life-changing." He turned to Percy, whose confusion was only growing. "Alright Percy. As of now, you have entered a new world. This world is dangerous, confusing, which is why Mr. Brunner wants to tell you nothing about it."

"That makes zero sense. If it's dangerous, shouldn't I know everything I can?"

"Knowledge is power Perseus." Mr. Brunner cut in. "And the more you possess, the more of these monsters that you will attract. If you truly wish to know, then I promise I can tell you everything and answer any question you might have, but only after summer vacation begins. That's when we can get you to safety."

Percy looked at both of them. "Those monsters. You can kill them?"

"I've been killing them for years." Shirou assured him, getting narrowed eyes from Mr. Brunner. "And Percy? 'Safety' is a relative term. No matter where you're told, if you are what I think you are, these monsters will be the least of your problems. But I will protect you."

One might call that hubristic, but Shirou meant every word of it. Even if he wasn't a friend, Percy was innocent. He wasn't a fighter, just a confused youngster who was in way over his head and needed reassurance that he was going to be alright. No, that wasn't giving him enough credit. He was more than that, Percy was as bullheaded and as strong-willed as they came. He didn't trust people easily, and he needed to know that he could do something on his own.

He needed a sword.

He looked once again to the scattering golden dust on the floor, the spiderwebbed marble walls, and looked back at him in resolution. "Tell me everything."

Yeah, yeah, I know. What the hell am I doing with another story in a completely different fandom. I already have two that I'm struggling with. But I saw this challenge from A Dyslexic Writer. It's not on his page, it's on Ch 11 of his story 'Bird of Prey', and the idea just would not leave me alone. As you can see, it's rather short, but it is only a trial run. Tell me what you think! This is my first foray into the crossover realm, so I could use some criticisms.

By the way, if I'm going to continue this story, then I'll be using Shirou from the True End of Heaven's Feel, Return to the Spring, for no particular reason other than I really want Sakura to have her happy ending And Rider's just really hot. But Sakura is Best Girl. Though I will concede that Rin is Best Tsundere.

Also, if anyone can come up with a better title, it would be much appreciated.

Later bitches!