Disclaimer: I do not own some of the characters in this story, and I do not own Sword Art Online. They are all the works of Reki Kawahara, and all credit goes to him.

Enjoy

The new Klein-ent

A gentle breeze flew through the city of coal. Literally, the place was called Coal. Composed of mostly soot, stone, and wood, the buildings stood tall-crushed against each other like samie twins. Huddeled inside them were the faces of tired NPC, whose life was hell compared to the players who played it for fun. It was ironic, then, that the roads running like veins within the town were as big as any other city. Anyone strolling through them wouldn't notice this thought-the whole place was packed to the nose-bleed section with players. Slyphs, Salamanders, Leprechauns, the roads were more colorful than the houses. Arguably, this was because it was so close to the mountains. A neutral-territory town that provided rest for the journey to the World Tree? No Slyph could pass it up. And neither could Klein. He was running through its crowded streets: jostling players aside, constantly checking his flank for his pursuers.

He couldn't fight them-they outnumbered him 10 to 1. What's worse, based on their guild's dress code, they could hide better than an underground Tarrasque (or, something else). So he just had to find somewhere to hide; someplace where they would miss him, or where they would have to reveal themselves.

Turning across a final corner, he saw a lone blacksmith shop. It looked like a typical village hut, with the exception of a chimney pouring thick smoke at the top of it. On the door, a sign read "open", next to a long-rusted name plate, "Wright, available bounty hunter!" Considering his circumstances, it fit his needs, and it was empty. A perfect place to wait out this pursuers. Glancing over his shoulders, Klein walked into the empty shop.

Wright's store barely had any customers. He didn't know if it was because his house looked 'average,' or because the blacksmith sign wasn't large enough, but business was usually slow. No matter where he went, Sylph, Salamander, heck, even around the world tree, business rarely came to him. Maybe it was because of its design; some customers came in, asking if he could 'tailor their clothes,' 'fill their beers,' or just thought he was an NPC. Yet the nostalgia the house gave just made him keep the design. Besides, the basement it provided gave him just enough space for him to work on spells and tools, especially on his "masterpiece": Kaleidoscope.

So it was a surprise when he heard the front door's bell ring. Too bad. He was working on Kaleidoscope's draugr-skinned sheath. He was still trying to figure out how to make it fit. Who knew it was hard to sculpt the undead's skin? With a reluctant sigh, he placed the sword in his inventory, and went out to greet this customer.

The customer, called "Klein" (unusual) was hiding behind a stack of maces. He was wielding a fearsome long sword and dressed like he was ready for the world's deadliest slumber party-being covered in red silk and everything. So far, his attention seemed to be directly on the front door-warily watching through its windows for any sign of movement.

Unfortunately, he wasn't paying attention to what was behind him.

"What's up?" With a shriek of surprise, Klein swung his sword at him. Wright ducked, then gave a satisfying CRUNCH kick to his underside. The poor player fell like a dead fish to the ground.

"What the hell was that for!" He asked

"Me! I could ask you the same question!"

"Okay, okay, sorry. I thought this house was abandoned, or something. From the outside, the whole place looked deserted, you know?"
Wright glared at him, "I could still kick you."
"NO! I actually have a much better proposition," Klein brushed the dust off his clothes as he stood up. "But first, introductions. I am Klein, a famous samurai warrior!" The guy began to flex in mock-fashion.

"Really, a samurai?" He couldn't resist a facepalm, "how much do you know about samurai?"

"Well, that they had a code…"

"Called Bushido,"

"They held a sword,"

"3 swords, actually. One of the swords was used to kill themselves." Klein looked at him, his jaw slack.

"Kill themselves?"

"Yes. It was called seppuku. They would stab themselves with a specially-made knife, right through the heart, whenever they dishonored themselves," Wright couldn't resist leaning in closer, "Which just happened a minute ago…." A heavy lump started to form in Klein's throat.

"Okay, moving on!" Klein rubbed his hands anxiously, "what's your name?'

Honestly, the whole thing felt pointless, what with their player icons above their heads. But basic courtesy still applied to virtual reality, he guessed.

"My name's Wright, expert blacksmith and sword fighter"

"Really? Are you in any guilds?"

"Well," Wright's soot-filled hands nervously brushed his hair, "Not really, but I'm especially good at fighting monsters!"

"Alright, Wright!" Klein said. "I just need your help for a while. You're a bounty hunter, right?"

"More like a service provider, really." He explained. "Except, the last time I was 'open for service', some girl took it the wrong way and tried... getting laid. Thank goodness for parental controls." Was it Wright's imagination, or did Klein actually smile at that image? "Anyway, what do you need from me?"

"Well. I was asking if you could protect me? Until I reach Legrue?'

"Protect you? You do know what game we're in, right?"
"Yes. It's just that, I have this bounty on my head and everything, and I have to be somewhere quick."

"Wait a second, you have a bounty on you? How much?" Now Wright was intrigued.

"Not Important." It obviously was if this 'master samurai' needed help from some stranger like him.

"Sure. So I take you Legrue, which is a 10-minute flight from here, I kick some butt, you pay me, and everyone's happy." He knew it was a mistake not to look up the bounty on this guy, but Wright didn't care anyway. This was the most exciting thing that had happened in a while, and he wasn't going to greedily pass up it for some cash. "We can talk money on the way. Now if you'll excuse me, I'll go get geared up."

"Yeah, you go do that, I'll go outside. Need some fresh air from all the dust here…" Wright made the motion of kicking at Klein again, to which he yelped and ran out the door. Chuckling, Wright went to go get his stuff.

What did he need? Wright always wore light orange Helheim-steel. It was strong and light enough for his needs (especially stylish). His health and mana potions were a standard for him; no trouble there. That just left his choice of weapons. He surveyed the basement. It was filled with hours of works on spells, weapons, and armor. Mainly weapons, which were his forte. They filled the room, from broken axes to scythes covered in colorful auras. They were meant to be sold, but business was usually slow, so they ended up being unused. He could've used any number of them, and he sometimes did, out of boredom, but he only had two main weapons. One of which was always equipped in his inventory, the other, Kaleidoscope, he already had equipped. But there was something missing…

Two nerves made a connection in his brain, and he realized that he had forgotten Kaleidoscope's sheath.

Nearby the cobblestone furnace, the massive horse-leather object hung from the rank like a drunk man. The sheath was full of scratches, burns, and holes. Sure, it wasn't the prettiest, sturdiest, or most comfortable sheathe, but it was the only one that fit Kaleidoscope. His other option was the Draugr sheath he was working on. Right now, the lower end of it was a tattered mess; it hadn't been sewed together yet. On second thought, maybe he should wear Kaleidoscope on his back, just like that guy, Gatso, from the Berserk manga.

No, that could mess up his flight, or result in him impaling himself every time he bent over backward. Still it was worth a shot.

Before he could decide, he heard a high pitch scream from outside. In a rush, he left the sheath behind, and he ran out the basement. He slammed open the front door, and was greeted by a group of…oh shoot. Oh no.

A group of role players. It was easy to tell; they all dressed in knight-like silver armor. In contrast to his plain-looking orange armor, theirs had a more complex and medieval design. On their chest plates, they wore the symbol of a proud golden eagle; its fierce jaws threatening to come to life. Like any proper RP player, they used generic swords, axes, and books seaming with ancient magic. Wright didn't mind the combat style RP player's chose-they could still put up a fight. It was just, their accent. The supposed leader was the perfect reason why they were so annoying. Towering above them all, he wore a brass-colored armor with high shoulder guards. The face of a golden eagle (it was the color gold) jutted out of his breastplate, its ruby eyes and closed mouth giving the creature a gentle manner. He had on a red cape that furled along with the wind, revealing the 2-handed longsword by his waist. He looked like a true work of Greek art (minus the nudity).

But, dammit, the way they talked.

"Push, squire, attack the enemy with all you have!" yelled the leader, brimming with more gusto than any male voice actor could ever achieve.

He looked in the direction of the 'squire,' and found a teenage-sized player gutting Klein through the heart with a spear. Likewise, Klein had his sword stuck through the squire's chest. From the look of both player's health bars, it was likely the squire's scream was the one he had heard. "For god's sake, squire, pusheth him with a force of a thousand men! Send the enemy flying to the grave!" Not wanting to fail Klein, Wright went over and kicked the squire aside, sending him flying towards the crowd of knights.

"Cometh, I failed you sire." The squire muttered, his eyes threatening to give out.

"But your health bar is…oh yeah." The knight regained his previous stature, "Don't worry lad, we, the Knights of Honorable Affairs will avenge you!" Then he looked right at him. "Smith master! What is the meaning of your treachery?"

"I'm protecting him for a…indefinite time," Wright said, keeping their plans a secret.

The knight chuckled. "You, protect him!" He pointed at Klein, "Hah! And you call yourself a bounty hunter."

"More or less."

"Aye, I simply laugh at the irony of the situation, for you appear oblivious for the price on his head," the leader grinned.

"So? I mean, as long as he pays…"

"5 million golden coins back? I think not!" The leader unsheathed his sword. "Sadly, it's only if he be brought back alive. Fortunately for us, though, Miss Guivineire had the generosity to equip us with teleportation magic!" He revealed from his inventory an ordinary knife glowing with blue runes. "One slice at the red and he will be at the mercy of the powers-that-be Miss Guivinere!" He tossed the knife over to Wright.

"You should be KILLING him, rather than protecting him from the unstoppable force that be the Knights of Honor…"
"Okay, cut the accent, or I cut your neck." Wright snapped. His hands began reaching for his weapon slot, not before glaring at Klein. "I'm sure he'll have some explaining to do, but for now, I'm going to have to smack your assess back to Dungeons and Dragons." Wright paused. "Because he's my customer. Or you could say, he's my Klie-nt?" an awkward silence filled the air, as the knights begin to sigh at the terrible pun.

"Sir? Should we just put him out of his misery?" Asked one of the soldiers.

"Aye, sir bottomstarch. Best to pun-nish those who cannot wordplay." As requested, the soldier called 'bottomstarch' pulled out a two-handed axe embroiled with diamonds.

"Well?" Wright asked, "c'mon then, sour ass!"

"For the Noble Knights!" He yelled, as he made a beeline for Wright, just as his fingers brushed Kaleidoscope's icon.

The poor soldier didn't even have time to react, as a 5 ½ foot long mega sword severed his head off. The Knights of Noble Affairs stood back, stunned.

"Holy Grail!" One of them screamed. "It's a big one!"

"Calm down, I've seen bigger sword," one of them snickered.

Oh it's much more than that. Wright thought.

The sword was a bit longer than a broad-sword, but it was much wider than one. Slightly wider than Wright's body, it could also double as a shield. It also had a bit of a triangle-tip, something Wright wondered was way too similar to Gut's Dragonslayer. It was mainly made out of cold Helheim-steel. Mainly, because the sword also had other metal's mixed into it, all covered by a draugr-oil finish (those useful dead guys). Along the black sword's edges were runes; emitting a faint blue under the Alfheim sun. Similar runes could be seen on the sword's hilt, if you could see past the gauze that wrapped around it. Besides that, the sword was only unique for its Kaleidoscope of metals and its size. Really, the only thing holding it together was three massive bolts at the end. This made it extremely heavy to carry, but also extremely deadly when swung. As one player learned…

"You fiend!" yelled one of the soldiers, as he charged at Wright. In defense, blocked the player's sword, the blade making a resounding ding! Against Kaleidoscope.

"Hey!" Wright yelled as he used the blunt side of Kaleidoscope to shove the person into a meaty overhead slash.

It didn't stop there though. The knights began to flank him from all sides, which made things simple.

Swing. The first row of knights advanced. They tried to parry his sword, but it had too much momentum, and just crashed right through it. The group after it tried performing a mage-circle; a row of shield-bearers protecting mages who would rain down heck on the enemy. Wright simply used Kaleidoscope as a pole to vault over the the knights and cut them down to size (get it? He was short? Aw, forget it.)

One by one, each knight tasted the cold edges of Kaleidoscope, until he heard someone scream.

"STOP THIS AT ONCE!" to his surprise, the leader had drawn his sword, and was pointing it aggressively at him.

"Knights! Call of your siege," Then a sly grin formed on his face, "this one is MINE'S!"

Wright shrugged. "Sure" And then Wright charged straight at the leader. As he swung his sword, the leader parried the blade, too much effort, and charged at Wright's now prone body. He swung it down to stop him, forcing the knight to use his sword to block it, almost crushed under the weapon's sheer weight.

"I," he gasped, "Sir Cometh, will not fall," He loosed one hand on his sword, "TODAY!" and gave Wright a direct punch to the gut, sending Wright flying back.

As Cometh was about to follow-up with a counter attack, Wright activated a sword skill, and made a stabbing-motion at Cometh. The force launched Wright forward, knocking the blade out of Cometh's hands. And right through Cometh. At this point, Wright momentum was too much for him to handle that, like a person holding the leash to an estranged dog, Wright launched himself through the barrack of Knights ahead, and only slowed down right in front of an innocent bystander.

"Heh heh," he laughed, nervously. "Oops?" The player just stood there, mouth agape at the massive weapon. Bystanders aside, the remaining Knights were all shocked at how efficiently Wright had destroyed their guild. Terrified, they ran off, screaming less like chivalrous knights of old, and more like the Nerdy 24hr D&Dr's they were. With that comfort, Wright went back to Klein.

"Well you have some explaining to do."

"Wha-me!" Wright's eye ticked, "mind telling me why your ass cost more than some rich boy's car?"

"Really? You want to know? You weren't that interested before…"

"Before I looked at this knife better?" Klein took another look at the blue knife in Wright's hand. On the handle was a tall feminine-looking figure, holding a mighty battle axe above her head. "This is the mark of Guivinere. The Game Master Guivinere. Cometh wasn't joking around." He looked at the blue knife in his hand, shaking with raw teleportation power. "What did you do to tick her off?"

"Well, it's a long story?"

"Longer than my sword?' Wright asked, immediately regretting the decision. "Not in that way."

Klein seemed oblivious to his comment and tooka d0eep breath. "It all began yesterday when my friends decided to do this raid for some legendary ghost-sword, which one doesn't matter. Well, my friends thought that we should log of near the mountains, so we each found out own spots to log off at. I was going to log off at a nearby town, inside this bar, but then I saw this pretty little lady…" Klein smiled with ecstasy from ear to ear

Oh god, Wright thought in horror, this man's a leaky faucet. At least, I hope he's man, not some gross 6-year old.

"And she was all alone," Klein said, "So I came over and asked her if she wanted to hang out. She rejected, and I got desperate, then drunk," Wright stares at him, doubtful, "Apperantly, when I came to, I discovered I had seriously pissed her off. That's when I found out she was a GM, since she had this super-rare weapon pointed at me, and the whole 'Miss Guinevere' name became familiar. Fortunately, GM's aren't allowed to abuse their powers against others anymore." Wright shivered at the thought, remembering the ALO crisis several months ago-the insane GM who experimented on 300 helpless SAO survivors, and how shell-shocked he had been. That incident had hit way too close to home. "And I managed to escape, in good part to my trusty samurai skills and agility."
"You just threw mugs at her, didn't you?" Klein's embarrassed face was the answer he needed. "Well, serves you right for turning of parent controls."
"Hey! I'm not going to pass up free alcohol for some mind-clarity. Besides, it wasn't obvious that she was a GM!"

"It should've been!" Wright screamed, "It literally says it right next to their name tag" Klein's embarrassed face just made Wright even more frustrated. "You turned off name tags, didn't you?"

"Well, I would like to blame it against stoned Klein!" Klein argued, "But we're off topic now! Basically, I ran away, got this bounty on my head, and now I have to make it to Legrue in one-hour and a half, so that I'm not late to that raid!" Wright looks at Klein, confused.

"How are your friends going to protect you from a horde of bounty hunters?" At that, Klein looked smug.

"Oh you'll see." Wright, once again, questioned this man's sanity.

"And I'm guessing you don't want to capture because then Guinevere will torture you?" Klein looked shock at that observation.

"I...didn't think about that."

"It's kind of obvious, with the teleportation knives and everything." Wright showed Klein's bounty from his HUD, and there it was. Under the picture of a drunk Klein, a 5 million coin reward, and the words WANTED ALIVE written, and underlined, several times in thick red marker. Or was that blood?

"My nose is not that big" Klein muttered.

"This isn't! This… Ah forget it!" Wright looked into his inventory, and found several hook used to saddle horses. He equipped it around his neck and waist, and tried fitting Kaleidoscopes into it. With some minor adjustment, the sword now hung at his back like a metal backpack. A metal back pack with a handle towering over Wright's head, but it worked. He should've really done this sooner. "Let's just get you to the mountains."
"Wait, you aren't going to turn me in? 5 million coins?"

Wright took a good hard look at him. "Buddy, with a bounty like that, all types of fighters are after you" he gave a sly smile "protecting you is a perfect way to get into a good fight! Plus, excitement! No way am I passing up an opportunity like this!" Wright summoned his wings, before realizing they don't fit around his back. He un-equipped Kaleidoscope, and summoned them again. "Ready to fly?"

"he he…well, there's this whole 'flying curse' thing…" With a groan, Wright retracted his wings.

"Then we're running, I guess" Vivaciousness pouring through him, Wright began to run off toward the distant, imposing mountains with high spirits.

Klein looked exasperated. "Wait…run? Hey! WAITFORMEYOU'RESUPPOSEDTOPROTECTME!" He screamed, as he chases after his fellow bodyguard.

Nearby, several hooded figures lurked in the darkness.

"He has a bodyguard now," One of the figures muttered.

"It's your fault!"

"No, it's your!"

"Shut up!" The leader, a red-headed female, commanded. "It's all your faults! You had a chance to trap him! You put a curse on him for goodness sake! Why didn't you grab him!"

"Cometh's men had cornered him," The figured complained, "I considered it rude to interrupt him"
"Rude! We're the Titans Hands! That's the whole POINT!" the leader pulled out a dagger. "and you better believe we are going to be hella rude to them on their way to the mountain!"

"Politely?" Rosalia made a motion of chocking him, before she reluctantly slumped down.

It had been a grueling time for her, since SAO fell down. After a year of prison, thanks to Kirito, in SAO, Rosalia was glad when she was finally able to disconnect.

Back into another prison. Sort of. Word of criminal guild members spread like wildfire over the internet, sprouting fears of former members refusing to give up the dream they had lived in the game.

As such, being one of the top members of Titans Hands didn't help. She was questioned, tried, but they could only accuse her off harming minors. They (fortunately) couldn't pit any murders against her. Therefore, after spending 6 months in jail, she was let off the hook, back into a world where she struggled to reconnect with her parents, a job, and any relatives she may or may not have killed by accident.

The rest, as they say, is pretty much history.

Too bad her old allies couldn't aid her-after the incident that landed them in jail, they had lost all faith in her. Now she was stuck with these idiotic mobile-gamers who couldn't tell a goblin from their own sword. But it was something she could use in her sweet vengeance upon Kirito. And she would do it through Klein, Miss Guinevere, and a whole lot of torture.

"All right," Rosalia was now feeling optimistic-a secret smile forming on her puffy lips. "On the count of three, we're all getting up, and following those two"

"Got it"

"One…Two"

"Three" Whispered a voice behind them. In a furious blur of red-and-black, the whole guild found their avatars dead on the spot.

And a confident figure standing over their corpses.