She angrily pressed the heels of her palms to her eyes,inhaling a stuttering breath as she tried to stop the ugly sounds from escaping her mouth.

In...out...in...out...in...out...in...out...in...out...in...out...please,please just stop...

She did the breathing exercise repeatedly,just like how mama taught her when she got lost in the streets months ago.

When she significantly calmed down,her sweaty palms slid down her face to gently rest on her rumpled skirt,her body slumped on the ground as she tiredly leaned her head on the trunk of the tree behind her,gazing blankly at the afternoon sky.

She almost didn't want to go back home,having no energy to even stand up or move.A sudden noise caught her attention,realizing quickly that it came from her frowned as a wave of hunger washed through her along with the unwelcome memories of why she wasn't able to eat her mama's delicious cooking.

She bit her lip,and after a few more minutes of just sitting there on the dirty ground,finally stood up and brushed her clothes to clean it as much as possible before walking to the small fountain of the park near the school she had taken as refuge and splashed the water gathered in her cupped pale hands on her face repeatedly.

She looked attentively around the quiet park and once deeming it empty of any passerby,carefully turned her skirt around,so that the back was at then grimaced at the dark stain on the back of the skirt of her school uniform,eyeing it for a moment,before wetting it and rubbing her fingers against the dirty patch and sighed when she failed at removing it.

Mama would be so disappointed in her.

She went back to her hiding place to retrieve her school bag and after a moment of deliberation,placed it in front of her skirt to hide the dark spot and headed home.

"Tadaima"she quietly called after entering her later,the soft padding of footsteps resonated down the corridor before her mama's beaming face greeted her.

"Okaeri,Chi-chan"her mama happily responded back."Did something wrong happen?You're rather late."she asked worriedly.

Her cheeks felt hot and she run her tongue over her front teeth as she stared at her mama's concerned chocolate brown eyes,embarrassment and shame churning in her stomach.

"I just tripped a few times on the way home,mama"she said with a sheepish smile-fake,a voice faintly whispered-on her face"is there anything to eat?I am really hungry"she asked before the older woman could question her couldn't bear lying to her mama more than necessary.

Her mama sighed at her with fond exasperation.

"Oh,Chi-chan.I'll go prepare you something to eat, wash yourself,alright?"

She nodded before hurriedly going to her room.

She tossed her schoolbag at the front before locking herself in the immediately opened the faucet of the shower,stripped her clothes and entered the shower with her skirt and underwear in hand.

She sighed contently as the warm water soothed the tensions on her body,joints and limbs relaxing and allowed herself to sit down,back touching the almost cold glass wall,creating an almost mirror copy of the event inner tighs were stiffened when she noticed the water swirling on the floor become a light red,knowing that it couldn't come from just her dirty clothes ,so she run a finger over the slit of her vagina and grimaced in disgust at the thing she found when she pulled back her was covered in a slimy dark red substance that couldn't possibly be blood,it was too solid and strange though it was the same frowned and decided to ignore it for now.

She took the liquid soap to her left and poured a generous amount at her clothes,imitating what her mama did that one time their washing machine broke and mama had to wash with her bare hands one of her dirty school uniforms.

"Chi-chan,hurry up!The food will get cold"

She startled abruptly at the sudden voice coming from the other side of the door.

"10 minutes,mama!"she said loudly in response,eyes wide in panic and heart beating faster as she stood up and put shampoo on,deciding to forgo using the conditioner as she hurriedly washed herself with soap-making sure to also remove the remaining slimy red thing on her body-and when any trace of shampoo and soap or questionable substances had been washed away,she dried her body with her fluffy towel and combed her shoulder lenght hair,quickly putting some clothes on and made sure to roll over many strips of tissue on her exited quickly the bathroom and her room and run down, tripping during her descent of the stairs and landing none too gently on the thankfully carpeted floor.

"Chi-chan!"mama's voice said loudly from the kitchen"how many times do i have to tell you again to not run down the stairs?Now come here and eat."

"Hai,mama"she responded meekly as she obbediently went to the kitchen at a more sedate pace,adjusting her underwear subtly and running her hand on her backside to make sure it was not in any way wet.

Her stomach growled once again at the mouth-watering smells drifting through the air and she hungrily eyed the food placed on the dining table.

"Itadakimasu"

She ate the food contently,mama humming in the background to the beat of the song playing at the radio for the moment as she cleaned the stove and she could almost forget her tighs' ache for a moment.

"How was school,Chi-chan?Were there any tests?Did you do well on them?Did you make any friends today?Did you like your lunch?"mama asked her cheerily and her shoulder drooped at the unwanted questions,knowing the other wouldn't like any of her chewed slowly and sipped her jasmine tea after blowing on licked her front teeth,sighing in defeat.

"It was fine, how about you?Is the bakery doing alright?"she asked.

Mama chattered happily about the bakery,saying how it was full of costumers and progressing nicely."Would you like me to bring you something for dessert,tonight?This weeks' special is beyond delicious,you should try it!"And as per usual,mama asked her weekly question.

She agreed to the proposition without never said no to the other,after all,when it came to 'Fate's Bakery',knowing how important it was to her mama,especially since it was one of the only things mama could expect to never change without her explicit order and was the owner of the bakery and the one who tends to it lovingly every single day without fail.

She sometimes felt as though it was the most important thing to the older woman whenever she would talk about it proudly,but she always made sure to stuff these thoughts away in a dark and forgotten corner of her mind.

Mama beamed at her and she found her own lips curling up in response.
It was fine.
She could deal with it.
She was long used to it anyway.